Finding Truth
by Raych
Summary: Lucas left for Charlotte with Keith end of s1. He returns almost 5 years later to find a drastic change for the Tree Hill residents.
1. Returning Home

**I've never done a OTH fanfic before but I much prefer Brucas to Leyton. Peyton seems quite a selfish, whiney character and until the episode with Q's funeral I never really thought she was that nice a person.**

**Basic premise to this fic is that when Brooke told Lucas in season 1 that she was pregnant she was telling the truth, but when she later told him that she'd previously lied that was the lie. Lucas went off to Charlotte with Keith. Dan never had his heart attack so Keith and Lucas stayed in Charlotte. This fic is set just after the gang leave college so they're all 21/22.**

"Mom? Who is this?" Lucas asked the question of his mother, but looking at the child before him, at her raven hair and blue eyes, he felt a drop in his stomach. Deep down inside there was something telling him who the child was.

"Grandma who is he?" The girl spoke her question at the same exact moment as Lucas and the dread deepened within him. He had not been back here since leaving with his uncle Keith over four and a half years ago. His mother had always found some reason for her to visit them rather than allowing them here. Now he felt like he finally understood why. When he'd walked in the door of his childhood home and been confronted by the girl for a split second he wondered if his mother had sold her home, until he heard her singing in the kitchen.

Karen Roe could barely breathe. She knew exactly who had walked into her home, what she didn't know was how the hell she could explain the last few years to her son, or her granddaughter. She had no idea how Lucas would react and felt desperately out of her depth at being flung into this situation. This wasn't her story to tell! It never had been. She begged for Lucas to be told the truth many times over the years, each time there was always an excuse.

"_Please Karen, I told you this in confidence. And because I need your help. I can't tell Lucas. After everything that has happened, I just can't. We both know what he'll do. He could never be like Dan Scott. We'll both be miserable and he will be throwing his life away. You know I'm right. I'm trying to give him his life, and do the right thing for all of us." The girl was pleading with her, and against her better judgement Karen agreed. True she didn't want this kind of life for her son, nor did she want it for the poor girl sobbing on her couch. She'd been through so much in the past few weeks. The hurt and lies and betrayal. The shock news. Her parents' vicious reaction. Becoming homeless and broke._

"_I won't say a word – for now. This isn't permanent. Just until the dust settles and everyone adjusts. I want you to move in here with me. I know how hard your life is going to become. I was lucky- I had Keith. You cannot do this alone." The tears came crashing down more heavily, but beneath them a smile was beginning to surface._

Karen stepped slowly forward, she needn't have tried to delay the inevitable though as the two occupants of the other room were both in the doorway to the kitchen in a second. Just when Karen thought things couldn't get any worse, she walked in.

"Karen, Haley came in early and sent me home, said she'd lock up and I looked far too exhausted to be at…" the girl's words trailed off as her eyes focused on her daughter, and the man stood next to her. "Luke." His name came out as barely more than a whisper. The blood had drained from her face and she stared around ashen. She opened and closed her mouth several times before finally tearing her gaze away from him and to his mother. Wordlessly they communicated a million things. Karen breathed a shy of relief at being able to leave the room, however she debated whether to stay regardless. It was not going to be an easy conversation. Against her better judgement she led Lauren away muttering something about getting an ice cream. The two remaining occupants of the kitchen waiting in silence until the child's voice disappeared and the door to the house closed. "You're home." For lack of anything better to say she stated the obvious, being clueless as how to start upon anything else.

Lucas stared at her and felt the bitterness of hate rise up in his chest and threaten to overwhelm him. "How could you never tell me?" There was little point in asking the paternity of the child he had seen, with her raven hair and blue eyes it was obvious her parentage. To find them both living in his mother's house only served to prove what he already thought. When he had left Tree Hill he had never planned on staying away so long. But his mother had always found reasons for him to do so. His anger knew no bounds as it slowly dawned on him just how many people were responsible for him being unaware he had a child.

"It was complicated." She looked away from him. He sneered at her.

"Complicated? Is that the best you have? For never telling me about having a daughter, for convincing my mother to never tell me. All of my friends here – Haley!" His blood boiled frantically in his body. Had he been the type he would have gladly struck her his anger was so great.

"Lucas I was confused and hurt. I had just found out about you and Peyton…"

"Peyton!" He cut her off sharply. "This is about her, I never got to know about my child because you were hurt and wanted revenge."

"No! It wasn't revenge. But I won't lie and say that wasn't related to it."

"You won't lie. How can I believe a word that you say? Nothing you ever say will mean anything to me. I can barely stand the sight of you Brooke Davis – you can burn in hell for all I care." He barged past her and out the kitchen door before she could respond. His thoughts were jumbled and he tried to figure out where he should go, he didn't feel like there was a single person he could trust anymore, at least not in Tree Hill. But he decided he didn't need a confidante, he needed someone to vent his anger at. And knew exactly who that someone was.

* * *

He stalked through town to his destination and slammed the door open as he burst in.

"Lucas! What are you doing here? Oh god I've missed you so much." Lucas backed away from the girl he had once loved, his anger knew no bounds and he was not in the mood for happy reunions.

"Missed me huh? Is that why you lied to me every time we spoke for almost 5 years!" People were staring at the two and he didn't care. His family had provided fodder for the people of Tree Hill his whole life, why bother stopping now. She looked like she'd been slapped.

"Lucas it's not that simple. There were reasons to not tell you."

"No Hales, you don't get to feed me some lines to make it better. I have a daughter and no one considered that I should know about her." The anger was beginning to subside as he accepted how painful it was to know the people he loved most had lied to him for so long. He sank down into a chair and Haley took the one next to him.

"Surely Brooke has explained why."

"I haven't really talked to Brooke. We exchanged words." Haley sighed.

"Luke, I was going to tell you. Clearly my loyalties were with you. But your mom said Brooke had her reasons and they good ones. That I should listen to her first. Brooke made it clear that not telling you wouldn't last forever. But I think the longer it went on the harder she found it to think of figuring out what to say." Lucas couldn't understand why Haley, his Haley, would lie for Brooke Davis. Nor why she'd defend her. "Luke things have changed a lot round here since you left. Brooke and I have spent a lot of time together, firstly because she works here and lives with your mom, but we just grew close and I saw a side of her I think she probably showed you back then. The side none of the popular kids know, except maybe Nathan and Peyton, saw. She even asked Nathan and me to be Lauren's godparents." It then dawned on Lucas that in all his rage at Brooke he had not asked a single question about his child.

"Her name's Lauren?" Haley tilted her head to the side and gave him an odd look.

"Yeah, Lauren Scott Davis. Her birthday is September 10th and her favourite colour is green. She wants a puppy." Sadness overwhelmed him as he realised that Lauren, his daughter, was a real person with her own likes and dislikes that he had no clue about. That she had grown and developed and he has missed everything. Just like that the anger returned.

"I'll never forgive any of you for keeping her a secret." With that he stormed out leaving Haley trying to figure out what had just happened.

* * *

"Still leave your door open." Peyton jumped at the voice and turned away from her extensive record collection to look at the owner of it.

"Luke, oh my god." She rushed to him and her arms went round him. Unlike with Haley he let her for a second. But then he gently pushed her away.

"You got anything you'd like to tell me?" The way he gazed at her she knew exactly what he was referring to. Peyton Sawyer was a lot of things, devious when it suited yet with the ability to be an amazing friend. But deep down she was one of life's victims and she justified her selfishness with that fact. She deserved to take what she wanted in life regardless of who got hurt and serve just herself because she had had something so intrinsic to her life taken away. Once again this destructive behaviour had led to trouble. "I know we aren't close Peyton, a few e-mails over the years, but you could have, SHOULD have told me about her." Peyton went to her bed and sat down. She couldn't tell whether it was anger or disappointment that flashed in his eyes.

"Lucas a few weeks after you left Brooke showed up here after either ignoring me or making hurtful comments towards me since she found out. I was shocked to say the least."

"_Brooke…I'm so glad you're here. I think." Truth be told Peyton was a little nervous to see her former best friend walk into her room. Brooke walked slowly round the room, leaving Peyton wondering why she was there. This wasn't an easy visit for Brooke to make, but for now it was necessary. In truth Peyton's room still felt very much like home and she allowed herself a moment to mourn the loss of her friend. In any other circumstance she would be clinging to that friendship right now. She'd always known she was alone, but for the first time in her life she faced the fact that being truly alone wasn't about being lonely in a room full of 'friends' – it was knowing that you had no one who cared. Peyton would probably be quick to say she did care, in her more reflective moments Brooke accepted she should have steered clear of Lucas Scott. That she should never have chosen to believe the words Peyton Sawyer spoke about not wanting him, that the veiled looks and glazed eyes spoke louder than her words ever could. But for the first time in her life Brooke had let a boy into her heart and she put her own desire before Peyton's. She'd never done that before, if Peyton had been honest with her about Lucas just once Brooke wouldn't have done it. But she hadn't been and so Brooke went with her feelings and fell in love for the first time. She bitterly regretted her mistake. It had cost her everything. She finally sat on Peyton's bed and looked at the blonde._

"_Do you regret what you did?" It hadn't been what Brooke had planned to say but the words were out her mouth before she could stop them. Peyton stepped forward._

"_God yes Brooke, so much. You're my best friend and I should never have done that to you." Brooke smirked on the inside, Peyton may not have wanted to hurt her but it still seemed clear that she didn't really regret being with Lucas._

"_We'll never be friends like we were." Brooke let her statement hang in the air, she half thought Peyton might object but she didn't. For once Peyton Sawyer accepted the cold truth. "We might salvage something though." Hope surged in Peyton's eyes. "There's just one thing. How much do I mean to you Peyton?"_

"_So much Brooke, you're like my sister. I'd do anything to make it right." Peyton's voice had wobbled slightly and for the first time Brooke questioned whether this would work._

"_I hoped you'd say that because I'm about to tell you something and if you ever tell anyone else, particularly Lucas Scott then you will be dead to me." Brooke knew she was being unfair and manipulative. She had become the bad guy in this scenario somehow, but she truly believed that this was necessary. Not just with Peyton but all of it, she had to protect her baby, and for now that meant keeping the father away._

"_Whatever you say stays in this room I swear Brooke." Peyton's desperation was obvious to Brooke and she felt guilty at using her like she was._

"_I'm pregnant." Peyton stumbled back into her closet door stunned by Brooke's revelation. She had not been expecting that at all. Peyton had felt guilt over what she and Lucas had done to Brooke. But she'd always been able to justify her actions with her belief that Brooke had been filling in for Peyton in Lucas' life. That Peyton herself was the one Lucas was meant to be with. For the first time now though the full weight of what she had done came crashing down onto her. "Peyton?"_

"_I'm stunned Brooke. You have to tell Lucas." Brooke shot up from the bed._

"_You swore Peyton!"_

"_But Brooke it's his baby too."_

"_It's not that easy. You know him, almost, as well I do. You know he'll come running back and stand by me to not be Dan. We'll all be miserable and sooner or later he'll come for you again. This time it will be a child's heart that breaks not mine."_

"_Just tell him that you need his support not a relationship for a child's sake."_

"_This isn't up for discussion Peyton. I've thought of every scenario for reasons I won't explain to you right now I've made my decision. You keep my secret and we can work on being friends again."_

"I think I knew even then that we'd never really be friends. But I missed her so much and knew that she was facing a huge challenge. I felt I owed it to her and to the kids we used to be to try and save our friendship. I know that she would never have come to me to fix things if she hadn't needed to blackmail me into silence. I just couldn't betray her again Luke, I'm sorry." Lucas sighed and sank onto the bed next to Peyton, he hung his head in his hands and felt like his entire world had crumbled in the past 24 hours. Nothing would ever be the same and he didn't know if there was a single relationship that was salvageable for him here.

"Peyton was it worth it?" He swung his gaze to hers. His eyes were almost dead as they looked into her own.

"Probably not." Her hand reached to touch his shoulder but she pulled back. Peyton sighed. "What now?"


	2. Conflicting Emotions

**Firstly I want to thank everyone for their reviews. This story has been in my head for a while and I was going to get a few chapters written at once but decided to post the first one as soon as I'd done it to see whether there was an audience for it.**

**Also Nathan and Haley did not have a baby at the end of high school. It just doesn't fit with this story.**

Lucas looked at the display on his cell expecting it to read either 'MOM' or 'HALEY' he was shocked to see it was his uncle Keith. He suspected Keith had been asked to call him by his mother so declined the call. He hadn't seen anyone since leaving Peyton's two days ago, well he'd seen one person – but he didn't count. His mother and Haley had both called him intermittently. He'd not answered once; he'd listened to the voicemails. There was still a huge part of him that felt massive guilt over the worry he was causing them both. But he was still too hurt and too angry to reply. When he'd returned to Tree Hill to see his mom and his friends he certainly had never intended to end up here. But with the betrayal running through everyone he knew in Tree Hill he'd been left with few options. There was a knock at the door and he felt safe in answering it, he had no doubt no one would have been able to figure out where he was staying. He wasn't avoiding everyone just because he was angry, he needed to figure out where his head was at. He was shocked to find Nathan standing there. He didn't say a word nor did he move so Nathan barged past him and into the house. He turned to face Lucas a look of distain on his face.

"Here? You ended up here?" Lucas shrugged and moved further into the room.

"I ran into him, told me he knew about Lauren, doesn't surprise me. Yet another person didn't tell me. But I don't feel betrayed by him, not about this anyway, it's not like we have a relationship. He suggested I stayed with him. It's free and I was under the impression no one would know I was here." Both the men looked uncomfortable in the beach house, with Dan's portrait gazing down on them. Lucas hadn't asked how it had all panned out with the other Scott family. He'd had other more pressing things on his mind.

"Luke you need to call your mom or Haley. They're worried about you." Lucas let out a cold laugh. "I mean it Lucas, I get that you're mad but you need to talk to them. You can't ignore them. They love you and want to explain what happened."

"They decided to keep Brooke's secret and never tell me I had a daughter. That's what happened." Nathan shook his head.

"Wake up Lucas, when has life ever been that simple. So what's your great plan hide out at Dan Scott's beach house forever." Lucas turned away, he didn't want Nathan to know he was without a plan.

"My plan is to stay here until they really get just how hurt and betrayed I feel. They are the two people I love the most." Lucas sighed. Of all the people to be here it was Nathan. They were not that close, but over the years they'd seen each other a few times when he and Haley had been to Charlotte. He knew from what Haley had told him that Nathan had changed a lot while he'd been away. Then again everything had changed a lot.

"The two people you love most betraying you, maybe now you know how Brooke felt back then after what you and Peyton did to her. Her best friend and the only guy she's ever cared about – there's no wonder her life is like it is." Lucas was too incensed to pick up on the latter part of Nathan's sentence.

"It's not the same thing! We were just kids. This has gone on years. Besides let's not pretend here, Brooke probably didn't care that much about me, she was never bothered by any of the guys she screwed and by her actions over the past few years not much was different about me. Good old Brooke Davis, anyone's after a few drinks." Nathan swallowed and spoke slowly.

"One day very soon you'll regret what just said about Brooke. But until then…" Nathan's fist caught Lucas squarely on the jaw and Lucas staggered back against the wall. Instantly his hand went to his face. "Remember that and remember this being a parent means putting crap aside and thinking of your child. Whatever has happened in the past if you want to be a good dad to Lauren, the kind she deserves then you need to realise Brooke is an amazing mother and you need to respect her because of it." With that Nathan was gone leaving Lucas to trudge slowly into the kitchen to retrieve some ice for his aching jaw. No matter what had gone on or how angry he was he knew he'd been out of line in what he'd said about Brooke. Brooke had cared about him very much back then and what he and Peyton had done to her was wrong. But to everyone else it seemed like that was an excuse for keeping Lauren's existence from him, he knew that was not an adequate justification for all that followed his betrayal of Brooke.

* * *

"Hey Hales." Haley's face was a picture of surprise at opening her door and finding Lucas stood there. Lucas with a very large bruise on his face.

"Come on in Luke." She opened the door wider and gestured for him to step inside. Once he was inside she walked to the couch and sat. He followed suit and they sat side by side in silence. They'd never sat in an awkward silence before and it was a new experience neither liked. It felt like there was a chasm between the two friends at the moment that neither knew how to bridge.

"I got your messages." It seemed like an idiotic thing to say to her but he didn't know how to start. He was reluctant to tell her that one of the reasons he was there at all was because of Nathan. "Part of me is still sorry I didn't answer you or my mom. It seems wrong. But I have no idea what to say. The two of you, it hurts far more that neither of you told me than that Brooke didn't." Lucas had never had a problem sharing his thoughts and feelings with Haley, but now it seemed foreign and unbelievably difficult to open up to her.

"Luke it's not like it was an easy decision. Brooke swore she was going to tell you. You know I never really thought too much of her. But Nathan and Brooke go back a long way and they were friends. She was so alone after what happened with you and Peyton. I know Peyton and I were building a friendship before you left but I just couldn't maintain that after what she'd done. I know I stayed friends with you, but you're just a guy. She was her best friend, since they were just kids. With her living with your mom I knew something was up. It didn't take long to figure out what when she was working at the café. The non-stop rushing to the bathroom to vomit was a give away. I couldn't know for sure that it was yours. But I guess I knew deep down it had to be for your mom to be so good to her. But the thing is Luke when you left can you for a second imagine how abandoned your mom felt. She'd given up everything for you, you were her world and you just left. It must have been such a slap in the face. Then this girl shows up alone and pregnant with your child. Not only were there huge similarities in the way your mom looked at her own past and Brooke's present, your mom found hope in Brooke. She was facing being alone and rejected by her own child. Then there was Brooke – a girl who desperately needed a mother, and she was carrying your child. Without the two of them I have no idea how your mom would have survived with you gone." He'd never before sat down and thought – or been told – about how badly his leaving would have affected his mother. He suddenly needed to talk to her more than anything in the world. He realised then that the bridges that had seemed so badly burned just a few hours ago could be fixed, the realisation that he had been partly responsible for his mother's actions showed the past few years in a vastly different light.

"I need to see my mom now Hales." She nodded at him and watched as he darted out the door.

* * *

He was taken aback to see the brunette answer the door.

"Brooke." He knew he even sounded surprised.

"Lucas why so surprised to see me where I live?" He cursed himself for being so obvious.

"I thought you'd be working." She smiled a little and nodded.

"You should probably know that everyday on the way home from school Lauren and I drop by the café to see Karen. Lucas if you want to talk to your mom and not have us around then be a man and knock on the door. I'd take Lauren out and leave you both to it. Don't play childish games like calling the café to see if I'm there and hanging up when I answer. It's pathetic." Her words cut through him and he hung his head before she would be able to see his face turning beetroot. Perhaps it had been childish but he had not wanted to be anywhere near Brooke, even if it was merely in passing.

"Obviously my mom isn't here so I'll go" Part of him wanted to ask to see Lauren, but he wasn't sure if he was ready. He was halfway towards the street before she spoke.

"Lucas there was someone waiting on the porch when we got home. I think you'll want to see them." He turned back and slowly walked closer to Brooke. She opened the door wider to let him through and it felt very strange for her to be inviting him into his mother's house. He couldn't help the grin that broke out on his face as he stepped inside. The man on the couch next to Lauren stood when Lucas walked in and the two embraced like it had been a lifetime since they'd seen one another.

"Uncle Keith what are you doing here?" The pair pulled apart neither noticing the awkward brunette still stood at the wide open door.

"Well I thought it was about time I met Lauren here." As Keith spoke he half turned to toss a grin at the girl. "Well it's about time for you to be getting washed up for dinner so I'll be getting going now."

"Will you come and see us again tomorrow? When my grandma is here." The little girl sounded so eager and earnest that Lucas had to smile. If Keith had been there for more than an hour Lucas would be surprised, but it sounded like Lauren had known him much longer.

"I sure will, I haven't seen your grandma in a real long time. Is she still as pretty as she used to be?" Keith smiled at Lauren as she beamed up at him.

"My grandma is the second prettiest lady in the world!" Keith laughed.

"So who can the first be?" Lauren puffed her chest up and gave the most amazing smile.

"My momma of course." Even Lucas was forced to smile at that. He wondered if Lauren realised just how like her mother she looked.

"Well of course she is, but I bet when you get older you'll be the prettiest lady in the world, cos you sure are the prettiest little girl." Lauren gave another megawatt smile at Keith before swinging to face her mother.

"Am I momma?" Brooke finally came to life and walked over to her daughter swinging her into her arms.

"You most certainly are." Keith stood back up from being at Lauren's height and slapped a hand on Lucas' shoulder.

"Well like I said I'm going to get going now, and Lucas here is going to take a walk with me. But I will see both you lovely ladies tomorrow." Brooke finally let go of a smile and stepped towards Keith. She leaned into him and he placed his arms round both Brooke and Lauren.

"It's so good to see you Keith." Lucas had forgotten how fast Brooke had become attached to Keith in the brief time they'd dated while his mother had been away. But that was Keith, everyone loved him. He was such an amiable guy that people couldn't help but like him. Lucas had once thought he himself was the same but had recently come to realise it was far more likely the opposite was true. He walked towards the door as the trio pulled apart. With another smile at the girls Keith followed him outside. Neither spoke a word until they were halfway down the street.

"So where you been hiding Luke? And how the hell did you get that bruise on your face?" Lucas was reluctant to tell Keith he'd taken Dan's offer of staying with him at the beach house.

"Nathan hit me. I deserved it though - possibly. So really why are you here?" Lucas knew Keith wouldn't press so changed the subject. Keith smiled.

"Your mom was worried. So was I. It's a pretty huge thing you've just found out Luke. I figured you might need someone to talk to."

"How do I even begin to wrap my head around the fact I have a child who is almost 5 years old?" Keith sighed.

"Luke it's not going to be easy for you, but you need to decide whether having a child is the same thing as being a father. I know that after Dan you probably have always thought that when you had a child you'd be a good father. But after everything that's happened since Lauren was born you need to figure out if there is a way past the hurt and anger because if there isn't it may be the case that being a good father is walking away and not destroying that girl's life. Ultimately Brooke is her world and if you can't get past how you feel right now but try to be in Lauren's life that hatred will destroy that little girl. She will be torn in two. Being a parent Luke means putting a child's best interests first even if we loathe what we're doing."

"I did always think I'd be there – so why is it so difficult to decide that I want Lauren to know I'm her dad?" Keith chuckled.

"I'm going to go with it's because this is not how you pictured it. If you screw up now she'll know about it. If you make a little mistake with a baby they forget it, it doesn't mean anything. Lucas sometimes in life things don't happen the way we think they will. We achieve the things we thought we would but it doesn't always mean that we got there how we thought we would. Luke I strongly feel like a parent to you." Keith paused and Lucas jumped in.

"Keith you are my father, in every way that matters." Keith nodded.

"I know Luke, and I love you as my son. What I'm saying is, when I was younger and thought about being a dad I never thought that it would be to my brother's child that he abandoned. I thought, like you probably did, that I'd meet someone, fall in love, get married and have a baby. That was how I'd become a dad, but it didn't happen. This happened and the end result is the same. I feel like a father. My point is that if being Lauren's father is the destination, does the journey really matter?"

**I did think I'd be getting some of Brooke's POV in this chapter but now I'm thinking it will be the next one, the one after that at the latest.**


	3. Building Bridges

"Lucas." The pleasure in his mother's voice at opening her door and finding him there was unmissable. Guilt almost overwhelmed him when he considered that he'd barely spoken 10 words to her since arriving in Tree Hill four days ago. "Are you coming inside?" He didn't respond immediately, though he did think he may have pulled some sort of expression filled face. "It's just me." He had for a moment worried his mother might have taken his reluctance personally, but it was a comfort to know that despite everything she could still read him. He nodded and she walked inside leaving him to follow her. She turned back to face him but didn't sit.

Lucas carefully appraised what he could see of his mother's home. The places where his baby pictures had sat were now occupied by baby pictures of Lauren, he briefly wondered if he had been completely erased from the house. He smiled when he saw the door jam with the measurements they had taken every year on his birthday for as long as he could remember. The marks in the wood showing his progression in height. His birthdays had always been spent with his mother and Keith. But the first thing that happened the morning of his birthday, before breakfast and presents, before Keith even arrived was that his mother would stand him in the doorway and chip the wood to show how much he'd grown in a year. He also noticed that the door jam on the other side of the doorway had the same marks in it. There were much fewer and all low down marks but there nonetheless. He wanted to ask if they were done on Lauren's birthday, if his daughter shared the same tradition with his mother that he had. But he didn't ask. Something stopped him from asking his mother the questions he wanted answers too.

"I'm sorry." She looked surprised.

"I thought was supposed to be my line." She smiled at him.

"We've both done things that hurt each other. But I think that my actions probably helped you make the decision to side with Brooke." She shook her head.

"Don't blame yourself for what I've done. You're my son and whatever had gone on is no excuse. I should have told you. Brooke was so desperate and broken when she first came here. And so adamant you didn't know. She had her reasons and as temporary ones they seemed adequate to keep you out the picture short-term. I did try and get her to tell you when Lauren was about 1, but she wouldn't."

* * *

"_Brooke I'm giving you this week off, go to Charlotte and tell Lucas about Lauren – or I will. It's been long enough."_

"_I won't go there and see him Karen, if you have to tell him there's not much I can do to stop you. But make no mistake Lauren and I will not be here when you get back."_

* * *

Lucas' blood boiled as his mother revealed how Brooke had threatened his mother in order to keep Lucas in the dark about Lauren. Brooke had been taking everything she could off his mother and had used an innocent child to get her own way.

"Mom I can't believe she did that and you let her continue to stay here and help her."

"Lucas don't be so mad at her."

"Why are you trying to defend her?" Lucas' voice rose and he realised he was shouting at his mother. When he'd come here he had come knowing that they would be well on the way to re-establishing their close relationship by the time he left but the way his mother was leaping to Brooke's defence made it hard to be rational.

"Lucas don't you yell at me. You don't know everything you know. There's more to everything than what you're seeing. A few difficult conversations regarding you can't erase all the other moments Brooke and I have shared. She has become like a daughter to me over the years and I love her deeply. I won't have you coming into this house and speaking badly of her without knowing all the facts." Lucas didn't know what to say. When all was said and done he felt so bad about things with his mother, but it seemed obvious to him that his mother didn't feel the same. It sounded like he'd been replaced by Brooke.

"Fine you want to preserve this special relationship you have with Brooke you can. I never realised that just because I needed to leave Tree Hill I would lose my mother." He was almost out the door before Karen had gathered herself enough to respond.

"Lucas Eugene Scott you don't just walk away like that." He turned back and stayed in the doorway. "You're my son and I'll never love anyone like I love you. But Brooke has been here with me now for 5 years and she has given me the chance to be with my beautiful granddaughter. I won't just dismiss that because you're back and you suddenly want a relationship with me again."

"I'm sorry I left like I did mom. I was young and selfish and so focussed on my desire to leave behind my mistakes and identity as Dan's unwanted son that I never considered how I was hurting you. I should have given you more consideration than I did. I'm sorry mom. I did miss you I know that I haven't been in touch much the past year or so but in all the time I was away you never asked me to visit and when I said that I was going to you either made excuses so I wouldn't or surprised me with a visit days before I was due here. Part of me thought that maybe with me gone you'd found the life you were meant to have if you'd never had me." Lucas looked away from her then, ashamed to admit that while he'd walked away from her part of him had blamed her for their estrangement.

"Oh Lucas." Her arms were around him within seconds. "I wouldn't have had a life without you. I never missed out on anything, my life was so much richer with you in it than it would ever have been without my having had you. I'm sorry I made you feel that way. I was just trying to find a way of keeping everyone happy." In his head he rephrased her words to say that she was trying to keep Brooke happy. His resentment of the brunette girl was steadily growing inside of him and he knew that if he saw her there would be hell.

"I love you mom." The words came out easily and though he meant them with his whole heart his mind was in a much darker place, thinking of Brooke Davis.

"I love you too Luke." He held to his mother tight, feeling better than he had done since he'd first stepped in her house upon his return. Yet strangely he felt worse too.

* * *

Lucas arrived at the River Court a little earlier than planned. His Uncle Keith had called him and asked to meet there around 7. Lucas knew today had been the day Keith would have spent with his mother, Lauren and Brooke. Lucas sat on the table and let his legs skim the bench hanging almost to the floor. The River Court hadn't changed all that much since he'd left, but there had been one thing that caught his eye. There sprawled in a circular pattern were the names of some of his dearest friends.

He knew that after he'd left Tree Hill Skills had tried out for his spot on the Ravens. He smiled, pleased his friend had made a success of his life. He'd been scouted a few months ago and was soon to make his NBA debut. Skills had attained the life that Lucas had dreamed of, that he knew Nathan had dreamed of also. The irony that Skills who had had so little chance of making it compared to both Nathan and Lucas should be the one whose dreams were coming true.

He looked at the writing and could almost picture them all there. The night that high school had ended. His best friend Haley and his brother Nathan. Skills and Mouth with Junk and Fergie hanging in the background as usual. And then there was Peyton and Brooke. The artwork itself was very Peyton, though he mused the idea seemed more Brooke. Despite the livid contempt he felt for Brooke he did feel a small prickle of guilt over the fact that he had destroyed what had once been a close friendship. He'd not spoken to Peyton since his first day back but from what hadn't been said by others, what had been said by her and the court in front of him he guessed that Peyton was an outsider of the group.

He smiled to himself as he realised that Haley was the centre of things and from her everyone connected. A far cry from little Haley James that was just a tutor, hiding away from the popular crowd. Things had obviously changed in Tree Hill since he'd left.

He felt entirely responsible for Peyton being a relative loner, she'd lost Brooke and because Brooke had by default gotten Haley via his mother and therefore Nathan and the others Lucas guessed Peyton had found the past few years hard. He idly wondered why she'd not left Tree Hill after graduation.

"Deep in thought there Luke." Lucas' head snapped up to see the owner of the voice approaching him. He slid off the bench and stood for a brief embrace. "Your mom told me you two had a talk this morning." Lucas smiled, it seemed as though Keith had never been away for how quickly he was accepted back by everyone.

"It was a good start." Keith produced a ball from behind his back.

"Fancy a little one on one?" Lucas smiled and grabbed the ball from him. The past few years living with Keith in Charlotte had been incredibly happy ones. Basketball had become a game again with Keith. Competition was something Dan was obsessed with and somehow Lucas had felt compelled to take part while in Tree Hill, being a Raven and the unwanted son he'd had something to prove. But shooting around with Keith at the local court in Charlotte brought his love of the game back to life again. The two stepped onto the court and were lost to the game. As usual Lucas wiped the floor with the older man, both were hot and sweaty when they collapsed on the bench at the end of the game.

"What was it like seeing my mom back where it all happened?" Keith exhaled loudly and Lucas was unsure whether it was due to the exertion or the question.

"Seeing your mom is always a little tough but it was a long time ago. We've both been in serious relationships since then."

"All those feelings gone then?" Keith laughed.

"Not exactly, you always hold part of the love you had for the first one forever." Lucas contemplated that statement. It was Keith's way of saying his mother still mattered to him, but Lucas questioned if by the reasoning in his statement Dan still mattered to his mother. And would…Peyton? Always matter to him. If he was unsure as to whether his first love, only love, was Peyton did that mean she wasn't? From what he'd heard you knew when you loved someone, especially the first time. "But it was a good time, being with your mom and getting to know a little more about Lauren. Mostly though Luke I enjoyed talking to Brooke. I know you may not think it but she's one hell of a girl, or should that be woman now?" Keith grinned. Lucas silently fumed. He had no idea what it was about Brooke Davis that let everyone he cared about see her as a good person when he saw the true Brooke.

"Rather you talking to her than me." Keith shook his head sadly.

"You any closer to knowing what you want to do about Lauren?" Lucas had thought of little else other than Lauren. His emotions were still conflicted and he knew that he had a lot he would need to swallow regarding Brooke if he had any chance of being part of her life. But he knew he couldn't leave Tree Hill now. Deep down he'd known from the second he laid eyes on her.

"I'm going to stick around here for a while."

"I'm glad you said that, though I figured you would. I've rented a small place for us to stay, unless you intend to remain with Dan." Lucas wanted the ground to open up and swallow him. He had not wanted Keith of all people to know he'd been at Dan's. He opened his mouth to explain but Keith waved his hand to let him know there was no need. "I figured that since it's the summer break and I've no work for a while I'd stay here with you until school starts up again. I think there's more need for me here than at home." Neither of them commented on the fact that Charlotte was home to the two of them now, and while Tree Hill was familiar it wasn't home anymore. Lucas was grateful Keith was hanging round. He was still the only person he really felt he could talk to.

"Thanks Keith. You're always there when I need you."

"I always will be Luke. You do know that you're going to have to talk to Brooke." Lucas nodded glumly "Look Luke I know you don't want to but you know you have to. What I'm asking of you is that you don't walk in there with all this hate towards her. Listen to the girl, go in there with an open mind."

"I'll try uncle Keith, I'm not sure how open I can be with her right now though."

"Well try hard Luke, for Lauren's sake." Lucas nodded.

* * *

His hand went out to knock on the door but before it connected he drew it back. He'd spoken to his mother and knew that she was the only one home. He'd planned it that way, no interruptions. But now he was faced with it he didn't want to go inside. All the emotions in him were fighting to be let out and he wasn't sure it was a good idea. The decision was taken from his hands though as the door was opened.

"I saw you walk up to the door ten minutes ago, were you planning on knocking or just admiring the paintwork?"

"Brooke, we need to talk."

**So this one is perhaps slightly short but I felt like I wanted to do their first proper conversation in Brooke's POV.**

**I know the thing with Karen makes Brooke seem very hard and cruel but there will be more on that later by way of explaining her actions.**


	4. Confrontation

**Thanks so much for all the positive reviews. I did want people to be able to understand both Brooke and Lucas' feelings and actions and not condemn either of them.**

**Also one of my favourite parts of this story has to be that with Keith being in Charlotte he is obviously still alive.**

She'd been waiting for him to show up, for not only a chance to begin to explain things to him but also to try her best to make sure that he blamed only her for everything. She hated that she'd caused such rifts between Karen and her son and Haley and her best friend. Now Lucas was here though she was terrified. The thought of opening herself up to Lucas Scott of all people was possibly the most horrifying thing she could think of happening right now. She'd tried to make light of the fact that he'd been stood on the doorstep for so long without knocking, but deep down she was scared that he was so angry with her still that he couldn't stand even talking to her.

"Brooke we need to talk." He sounded so contained and in control while she thought she was verging on physically shaking. His words from almost a week ago still resounded in her head. _I can barely stand the sight of you Brooke Davis – you can burn in hell for all I care._ Despite everything hearing him say that had hurt her deeply. Yet one more thing she'd never admit to a soul.

"Come on in." The second the words left her mouth she regretted them. She had a nerve really, inviting him into HIS childhood home, HIS mother's house. She watched him closely as he came inside, for the first time she looked at the place that she called home through his eyes. She'd always thought that Karen's house hadn't changed at all since she'd moved in 5 years ago, except for Lucas' room. But she suddenly noticed how she and Lauren had taken over the place. "Your pictures are in your mom's room." She didn't know why she'd told him that. It hadn't been a conscious attempt to push Lucas out, but as Lauren got older and there were more and more pictures of her on display Lucas' childhood pictures had just ebbed away into Karen's room until there was just one or two in the main house. Lucas didn't respond and she kicked herself for even mentioning it. Truth was she was more nervous than she'd ever been in her entire life.

"Does Lauren know who I am?" Brooke sighed and sunk into the lounger. Lucas remained standing though which made things more awkward and tense.

"She knows that you're Karen's son. She knows that you don't live here, I told her that was because Keith was alone in Charlotte and lonely so you went to live with him, but Karen had us so it was okay that you left." Lucas snorted. It was a harsh, bitter sound and Brooke's insides shrivelled.

"What have you told her about her father?" Brooke licked her lips.

"Nothing, not a single word." She watched as Lucas rubbed his hands over his face.

"How the hell could you not have told me?"

"Lucas I did tell you." He laughed at her then.

"You told me you were pregnant, it wasn't mine and then you told me it was all a lie."

"I know, when I said it to you it was because you were pushing me. I didn't plan on telling you until I was certain and I knew what I was doing. But then when I saw the look on your face saying it wasn't your baby made sense. Plus you had just called me a slut. I was never with anyone else." Brooke knew that tiny detail didn't matter now but for some reason she wanted him to know all the same. "Then when I did find out I was scared and I wanted to pretend it wasn't happening. So that's what I did. By the time I was forced into facing facts you'd gone to Charlotte. That's when I went to your mom."

"You could have called and I would come straight back here." She nodded, she'd known he would have. That was part of the problem.

"Luke I was a scared, knocked up kid. My parents had disowned me and I had nothing. My whole world had fallen down around me in weeks. My parents were never great but losing them completely, along with my oldest and best friend and the only guy I ever cared about. I was such a mess. I just needed to figure things out by myself before you knew. Your mom got that which is why she said she'd keep quiet for a while."

"Yeah and then when she'd had enough you blackmailed her by threatening to take Lauren away if she told me. That's about a year after blackmailing Peyton to keep quiet too. Congrats Brooke stunning." The contempt in his voice made her question herself for a moment. Then she dragged herself back together and stood up, letting herself become angry too.

"You have no right to judge that. Your mom knew deep down I never meant a word of it. I could never have taken Lauren away from her, not after she'd lost you. Besides your mom had become the parent I needed. And Peyton, let's not go down that road. Because between the three of us what's fair and right and, and, and just. That got screwed up way before I did what I did. I don't regret what I said to Peyton, in some ways it was a good thing. Needing her on my side made me try and be her friend again and for that I'm glad. If I hadn't I might just be sat here thinking we could have made it right. But we couldn't."

"Maybe your friendship wasn't as strong as you'd made out then." His words were sneered at her. She resisted the urge to slap him.

"Our friendship was EVERYTHING to me. And you two destroyed it all. The stupid thing is if she'd have once told me she wanted you I wouldn't have gone after you. If either of you had had the courage and decency to tell me how you both felt then maybe just maybe we'd have salvaged something from the whole mess." Brooke hadn't wanted to get sucked into a discussion about what had happened in their high school love triangle. While their betrayal perhaps had coloured her view when considering telling Lucas about being pregnant or not it hadn't been the entire reason.

"So emotional blackmail aside then, were you ever going to tell me?" Yes she was going to tell him. There had been many times when she'd considered doing it. But she'd always been so afraid of his reaction. As the time had gone on she'd become more scared. So she'd eventually made a decision about when would be the right time.

"I was, I decided that when Lauren asked me I'd tell her everything and I'd tell you too." It was the truth, she'd dreaded the day Lauren asked questions about her father but it hadn't happened. "I thought that once she got to school and other kids talked about their fathers she'd ask but she hasn't." Lucas shook his head.

"Look around you Brooke, are you surprised? Where are all the fathers in everyone's lives? Has she ever witnessed any of you spending time with a father? You obviously never see your dad, Nathan has as little to do with Dan as possible. Both Haley's are god knows where. What do you expect from her? She probably thinks the kids from school have strange lives, not that any of us do." Lucas was right Brooke mused. Lauren had grown up with Nathan being the only male she really had in her life. There was little wonder she'd not been curious.

"She would have asked eventually."

"When Brooke? How long you going to wait for her?" Brooke had no idea. "I just don't understand how you could do this to me." Brooke hung her head for a second before flinging it back and staring him straight in the eyes.

"To you? I did it for you. The fear I saw when I told you was real. Lucas you had so many dreams and I didn't want to ruin those. Being a teenage parent wasn't a plan for me, but I had the final choice. It was a tough situation to be in but ultimately to keep the baby or not keep the baby was my choice. And I chose to be a 17 year old mom. It didn't seem fair to ask you to be a 17 year old father."

"I wouldn't have been Dan, I would have taken my responsibility seriously." Brooke knew he would have, she wasn't afraid of Lucas being like his father – she'd been more afraid of him being like Nathan's.

"I didn't want you to lose your dreams Lucas and become bitter. I refused to raise a child like Nathan had been raised. By two parents who hated each other and blamed each other for the wreckage that was their lives."

"It wouldn't have been like that."

"So you wouldn't have made the suggestion that we be a family?" Brooke challenged him knowing that his answer would most certainly be in line with her opinion of him.

"Yeah ok so maybe I would have done that, but Brooke you despised me after Peyton you wouldn't have said yes. Maybe then we would have been two people who raised a child – apart." Brooke refused to comment, she refused to let Lucas see her.

"And then what? Eventually you and Peyton would have hooked up and I'd be left stuck home with OUR child while you lived the teenage life with _her._" Brooke was unable to stop the venom in her voice. She knew that in order to protect her inner self from Lucas she had effectively let him think she was a bitter, twisted, vengeful person.

"Once again we're back to Peyton. Why not just admit it Brooke? This was all out of spite. This was your revenge cos I cheated on you." Brooke wouldn't tell Lucas the truth, nor would she agree with what Lucas believed was the reason behind her keeping Lauren a secret. Lucas was yelling now with his face twisted in anger. She supposed she'd known things would turn out this way between them but had still held out the faint hope that they wouldn't.

"I'm sorry I kept her existence a secret from you for so long." She said it to defuse the charged atmosphere. But she wasn't lying when she said it either. She knew Lucas would take what she'd said as her admitting that revenge had been her motivation, for now though she had to leave it be. She really only wanted to salvage everyone else's relationships with Lucas, and if he wanted, for one to be established between him and her daughter.

"Sorry doesn't make it better."

"I know. Lucas I know you don't believe I planned on telling you, but please believe this I never meant to hurt the relationships you had with your mom and Haley. You mean the world to them both and that never changed for a second. I know you need to hate me but please don't hate them."

"I want Lauren to know me." Brooke nodded. She hadn't expected any less.

"I won't stop that Lucas, but it's important for you to realise that I won't just let you take her. I thought that maybe 2 afternoons a week you can collect her from school and one afternoon on weekend you can take her out. Obviously from that you know I'm looking at long term as school's just finished. I thought that during summer vacation what would be a good idea is introducing you to her slowly. Maybe coming by for dinner, nights when I'm working." Brooke knew neither would be able to be around one another, and any atmosphere Lauren sensed would certainly make forging a bond harder for Lucas.

"That sounds good. But I'm not sure I can face so long with just dinner once or twice a week."

"No I didn't mean that, just maybe a week or two, then progress to having her once a week, building it up before school starts."

"Ok then."

"Lucas there's one more thing. Like I said I won't just you let you take her, initially either your mom or Haley, people Lauren is very comfortable with, will go out with you."

"Brooke I can look after her myself. I don't need supervising."

"I thinking of Lauren, I don't want to fight again about the reasons for it but you're a stranger to her. Please Lucas think how daunting it would be for her. It's not like it's forever." Brooke expected more of a fight from Lucas so was surprised when he nodded. She knew it would be a long time before she and Lucas came face to face again.

**I just wanted to say there isn't going to be that much interaction with Lauren. The story is more about the adult relationships, Lauren is the catalyst rather than the story.**


	5. Baby Steps

**The next few chapters will probably be a little shorter as the next main part of the story needs some things to happen first to work.**

"Hey." Brooke turned her head to the voice that greeted her.

"Haley what are you doing here?" Brooke had been sat deep in her thoughts on a park bench while Lauren played happily on the swings.

"I was visiting Keith when Lucas got home, I figured you might need a friend to talk to. I called by your house and Karen said you were here." Haley reached Brooke and sat beside her.

"Thanks Haley, but there's not much to say. He hates me but wants to see Lauren. That's pretty much it." Haley pulled a face.

"He was there for a while Brooke, surely more happened than that." Brooke knew why Haley was pushing. She wanted to know whether Brooke had been honest with Lucas.

"That's a brief summary, there was yelling and awkwardness. And Haley I just couldn't bring myself to tell him everything. I covered the main reasons." Brooke doubted Haley would believe her, but at the same time knew it didn't really matter. Haley would be loyal to Brooke and she knew it. It's not like telling Lucas the truth would really change anything. The truth behind things wasn't some amazing justification for what she'd done anyway. That's what she told herself. Lucas probably would have a better understanding of things but he'd still be angry. No matter what the reasons were he still missed Lauren's first years.

"Brooke I thought that you were…oh my god." Brooke turned sharply from watching her daughter to look at her friend.

"What's wrong?" Brooke watched as the unreadable look on Haley's face turned to a smile.

"The baby just kicked for the first time." Brooke let out a sigh of relief before grinning.

"Haley that's great." Haley guided Brooke's hand to her stomach so she could share the moment with her.

"I can't wait to tell Nathan, for him to feel this." Brooke let her smile stay fixed in place for Haley's sake but inside she was sorrowful. She didn't ever see a day where she would have what Haley and Nathan had. While she loved Lauren dearly she admitted only to herself that she wished for more children, and a husband she loved to share the joy with her like Nathan did with Haley. She wished for the life her friend had. She wanted a family, and regretted that she'd never been able to give her daughter the stability she herself had craved as a child.

"Haley I'm ok and you should go tell Nathan the good news." Haley looked at her quizzically obviously assessing whether she really was ok and Haley could go to her husband.

"Brooke no one expects this to be easy for you." Brooke nodded.

"Haley go see Nathan." Brooke's words were strong and forceful and with one last glance Haley hugged her and left. "Lauren!" Brooke shouted to her daughter who came running over. Brooke winced as she watched her jump from the swing and almost shouted at her for not waiting until she was closer to the ground. But she didn't shout, she knew she'd done much more dangerous things.

"Yes mommy." Brooke smiled at her daughter and picked her up and sat her on the spot Haley had just vacated.

"It's your birthday in a couple of months, what would you like?" Lauren's birthday was a little over 2 months away and it was early for Brooke to ask her about it. She couldn't believe her baby was going to be 5 years old soon. She wanted to give her the world. She knew she couldn't though.

"Momma can I have a puppy?" Brooke smiled, Lauren had been asking for a puppy incessantly for a few months now and she'd constantly found excuses. Now though she wanted to make her child happy before she told her the truth.

"Maybe if you're real good." Lauren grinned.

"Momma you always say I'm real good." Brooke laughed. She wanted to hold her child tight and never tell her how weak her mother was. She wanted Lauren to always see her as she did now.

"Lauren baby you know Grandma Karen's son Lucas is in town now." Lauren nodded. "Well he's going to be spending time with you, not on your own but sometimes with grandma and sometimes with aunt Haley, is that okay?" Lauren wrinkled her nose.

"I guess so." As Lucas had pointed out the concept of male parent had obviously not entered Lauren's head previously because no one in their world seemed to have one.

"Lauren you know that I told you that Aunt Haley and Uncle Nathan were going to have a baby." Lauren nodded again staring at her mother wide eyed and confused. "Well when the baby is here Aunt Haley will be that baby's momma. Uncle Nathan will by the baby's dad. Every baby has a momma and a dad." Brooke wanted to slap herself and tell herself she was doing an awful job of explaining.

"Does that mean I have one?" Brooke sighed, Lauren maybe was beginning to see where she'd been headed.

"Yes honey you do. The way it works is, two people have a baby and those people are the momma and the dad, then when the baby grows up and becomes a grown up and has their own baby they become a momma or a dad. That momma or dad's momma becomes the new baby's grandma. So if you're the new baby and Grandma Karen is your grandma then what it means is that grandma Karen's baby grew up and had you and became…" Lauren interrupted with sparkling eyes, pleased she was grasping what her mother was saying

"My momma." Lauren smiled.

"Well baby grandma Karen isn't my momma, which means that since she's your grandma her baby must be your dad. Do you see?"

"I think so. So Grandma Karen has a son and he's my dad." Brooke nodded.

"Yeah honey that's right. Lucas is Grandma Karen's son, which means that he's your dad too. Which is why he wants to start spending some time with you." Brooke paused and waited for a response from her daughter.

"Momma if you've always been my momma and Aunt Haley and Uncle Nathan have always been their baby's momma and dad why hasn't Lucas always been my dad?"

"Well sweetie Lucas has always been your dad, but for grown up reasons he hasn't been able to be with you, it doesn't mean he loves you any less than I do. It's just too complicated for you to understand. But now all the grown up reasons for Lucas not being in Tree Hill are gone and he's here. He wants to be a proper dad to you now, which starts with just spending time with you like I said with grandma or Aunt Haley there too." Lauren yawned.

"OK momma, can we go home now? I'm hungry and a little tired." Brooke smiled.

"Sure sweetie." Children were definitely resilient. Brooke was surprised Lauren wasn't doing her usual chorus of why to everything Brooke said. She was however grateful for that fact.

* * *

Brooke flopped back onto the couch and her hand reached for the chilled glass of white wine Karen had thoughtfully poured for her. She'd just tucked Lauren into bed and felt after the stressful day she'd had Karen had read her mind.

"Thanks Karen." Brooke turned her head slightly to look at the older woman who was sat with her feet curled underneath her body on the lounger to the right of Brooke. She too had a glass of what Brooke thought tasted like Pinot Grigio in her hand. Brooke sighed, it was more of a happy sigh than anything though. While her day had been stressful she was glad it had happened. Since Lucas' return she'd been waiting for the confrontation and for what demands he would make upon her. She'd also known the day she told Lauren about her father was looming. It was a relief to have it all done now and she was pleasantly surprised with how well Lauren had taken things.

"How did things go with Lucas?" Brooke looked Karen straight in the eye.

"I told him not to blame you or Haley, to just be mad at me." Karen shook her head slightly.

"I don't need you to do that, nor does Haley. If either of us had truly thought your reasons weren't valid then we wouldn't have kept quiet. Nor would we have kept quiet if we believed you wouldn't tell him. I take responsibility for what I did Brooke, no one forced me." Brooke hung her head in shame.

"I told you I'd take Lauren away." Her words were quiet such was her guilt.

"Brooke I never believed you. I thought if I pushed you a little you'd tell him, but what you said didn't worry me that you'd go. It showed me you still weren't ready. Besides I'd be an idiot to have believed that, with no money and a child where would you have gone?" While Brooke had told Lucas earlier in the day Karen had not been emotionally blackmailed by herself into staying quiet because she'd known Brooke would never carry out her threat it was a relief to know she was right in her thinking.

"I still should never have said it Karen. It was so cruel of me given that Lucas was in Charlotte."

"I don't dwell on it. As I told Lucas a few bad conversations about him don't erase all the good ones we've shared." Karen was right Brooke mused, they had shared some good times. It wasn't just the big moments they'd had, nor was it the help and support Karen had provided her. Mainly for Brooke the times she most cherished were the ones just like this. The nights the two would settle down with a drink together and just talk, or watch a movie together. It was those moments where Brooke was finally able to forgive her own mother for never doing any of these things with her. Karen was an amazing grandmother to her daughter and she was the mother Brooke had always wished for.

"Karen I'm sorry for never thinking of the strain I was placing on your relationship with your son. But mostly I feel nothing but gratitude for every single thing you've done for us both." Brooke felt tears well in her eyes and it was the closest she'd gotten to showing emotion to anyone in a long time.

"Oh Brooke, you gave me more than enough back. You're like a daughter to me." Brooke smiled. The storm had hit when Lucas returned and she'd been terrified but really despite the hardships on the horizon she really was blessed with a good life. A beautiful daughter, great friends and more than anyone could ask for - a mother she'd been able to choose.


	6. The Other Scott Family I

Lucas stood in the doorway watching for a few minutes before speaking. She'd always intrigued him and nothing about that had changed. Now life seemed to be settling into a routine he was able to find time to give his curiosity a chance to find answers.

"Hey you." She looked up startled and hit her head on a shelf. Lucas stepped forward. "Sorry." She shrugged and rubbed her head.

"How's it going?" He smiled.

"Pretty good. I took Lauren swimming with my mom on Tuesday and then on Friday we went ice-skating with Haley, yesterday we went for picnic with my mom. It's been a good week." She smiled at him and reached out to touch his arm.

"I'm happy for you Luke, the first big week of outings seems to be a success. But apart from treating her to exciting places, how was it really?" She sat down at the chair from her desk and scooted closer to the bed where he'd placed himself.

"It was weird obviously. I'm a stranger to her still, but she was pretty curious about me which I took as a good sign. She's an adorable little girl." Peyton nodded along with him knowing only too well how charming Brooke Davis' daughter was. "Friday was awkward with Haley. Things are easier with my mom than her. It feels like she's team Brooke, whereas my mom is starting to feel kinda like Switzerland." They shared a smile.

"If it helps I'm team Lucas."

"Actually Peyton I wanted to talk to you about Brooke, well not Brooke completely. It's just clearly you're not close, in fact I think you probably haven't spoken since I got back like a month ago. I might be out of line here but most people seem like they're team Brooke and since you're not I just wondered why you never left after high school." Peyton stretched where she was sat raising her arms far above her head.

"Wow tough question. I spent a long time hoping that we'd get there. When it became clear we wouldn't I did think about leaving. But the magazine work is good and I live at home still rent free so financially I'm probably better off. But the truth is Lucas I knew you'd come home. I thought that since I'd waited around so long a couple more years waiting for you didn't make much difference, sure enough 9 months later here you are." Lucas shook his head.

"Peyton you needn't have put your life on hold just so you could justify your actions to me."

"I didn't." Her words hung in the air, Lucas knew exactly what she meant by that. He wondered whether it was that easy, for either of them. Peyton had refused him back then because she couldn't or wouldn't hurt Brooke, things had changed between the two of them but would it honestly be any easier now. The more important question was did he even feel the same about her as he did then.

* * *

Lucas had been making big plans every time he was due to take Lauren out, but he realised it wasn't about impressing her with what he could give her, he wanted to connect with her. Today would be special, he would take her to his favourite place in the world. He almost had a spring in his step as he hopped onto the porch to knock on the door. His heart fell when Brooke answered. She should be at work today he knew. Haley should be waiting for him with Lauren. Brooke being here meant something bad and he suspected it would mean problems for him seeing his daughter.

"Brooke." He knew his voice was cold yet didn't care. He was already mentally preparing his argument against her decision not to let him see Lauren.

"Haley's in the hospital." That he wasn't expecting. "They're running checks but it's pretty certain that she's gone into premature labour, they're hoping given the right treatment they can prevent her giving birth so early."

"But she's hardly even showing how can she be in labour?"

"She's not showing because she lost weight in early pregnancy from such severe morning sickness, she's actually almost 27 weeks."

"What's that in real terms?"

"Roughly 6, 6 and a half months."

"So how is she in labour?"

"I don't know, in a small number of cases premature labour can happen. Look Luke this is silly, standing talking about this on the doorstep, come in." Lucas was unsure how to act, he and Brooke hadn't spoke in almost a month and he'd been so convinced that she was ready to turf him out of Lauren's life. He followed her indoors. She held a finger to her lips and inclined her head to his old room. "She was really excited about her little cousin. I didn't want to say anything to her until I know what's happening."

"That makes sense." It had become clear to Lucas that whatever else she may be and whatever he felt about her Brooke was an incredibly good mother to Lauren. They both sat and Brooke began to whisper more information to him.

"Apparently it can be something as simple as stress or overworking. Haley was so insistent she help out at the café over the summer, we didn't think it was too much for her though I suppose she should have rested once school was done. Then again I worked right until 3 weeks before Lauren was due so…" the way Brooke left her sentence hanging made Lucas wonder if there was even a reason for what was happening to Haley, was it just as simple as bad luck?

"When will you know anymore?" Brooke shrugged.

"Lucas the thing is that I know you have a day planned for Lauren and Haley was supposed to supervise." And now it was coming, while he knew Haley's condition couldn't be helped he had known that he would miss seeing his daughter. "I don't want you or her to miss out. So I'll supervise if that's okay. If not we can reschedule for when your mom's free." Lucas was shocked, he suspected Brooke had as much desire to spend time around him as he did around her. But if she was willing to put her feelings aside for Lauren then he certainly would.

"No Brooke, today is fine. Plus I'd like to be around to hear about Hales." Brooke nodded and stood up.

"Lauren your dad's here." A brunette whirlwind entered the room. Lucas had been overwhelmed by Lauren's seamless transition into a girl with a father. He'd expected awkwardness but she always seemed so pleased to see him.

"Hey daddy. What are we doing today? Mommy said that auntie Haley can't come with us today so we might not be able to go?" Lucas knelt to his daughter's level and looked her straight in the eye.

"Well no honey she can't come but since I had such special plans for today your mom has said we can still go and she's coming instead of auntie Haley." Lauren's face lit up.

"I get both of you." Lucas didn't know whether Brooke felt the same anguish at her joy that he did. The fact they couldn't even be in the same room with one another when it clearly made Lauren so happy seemed insane.

"You sure do baby, now come get your jacket and shoes on, while I put mine on then we can go." Lucas stood as Lauren raced to the door and followed Brooke's instructions. A few minutes later Lauren was skipping down the street with her parents trailing behind her.

"I wanted to take her to the Rivercourt." Brooke didn't respond. "I feel maybe I have been spoiling her with big outings so I thought it'd be nice to go there and just get to know each other without all the bells and whistles."

"She doesn't need all that stuff Luke, it's not the life she's led. She thrives on love and attention. Just do the stuff Keith did with you. I know from experience money is not a substitute for a parent." Lucas hoped he'd be a good father to do justice to the two people that had raised him. He realised then though that Brooke was a good mother purely from learning from her own parents' mistakes.

"What is this place daddy?" Lauren turned to look at him. Lucas walked towards her and swung her into his arms.

"This is where I spent almost all my time when I was growing up. I came here with auntie Haley and our friends."

"Did uncle Nathan come too? He loves basketball and he tells boys how to play. Did he tell you daddy?" Lucas laughed.

"No he didn't tell me. See I'm actually a few months older than your uncle Nathan so everything he knows he learnt from me." Lucas heard Brooke's snort of laughter from where she sat on the bench. He turned to look at her and for a second glimpsed her as she was at 16. All confident and sexy, so at ease sat there talking to Mouth as if she'd belonged there her whole life. She seemed almost broken now compared to then. Lucas set Lauren down at the free throw line and handed her the ball.

"How about daddy teaches you everything he knows so when you grow up you can play for the WNBA?" Lauren wrinkled her nose and again Lucas saw how much of Brooke was in his child.

"I want to be an actress daddy, so I can wear all the pretty clothes. I dress up in momma's old clothes so I can be a pretend actress." Lucas chuckled.

"Do you really? Well how about I teach you so that if you ever need to act like someone who can play basketball you'll be fine." Lauren's forehead creased in concentrated thought.

"I guess that makes sense." Lucas knelt beside his daughter and talked her through how to get the ball through the net. They practised for a while happily until the unmistakeable sound of Brooke's cell was heard. Lucas then tried to split his focus between his daughter and the call, something in him told him it was about Haley before Brooke even answered.

"Nathan, how are Haley and the baby?....Well what's the next step?....And if doesn't do that?...Yeah sure tell her I'll come see her soon. Be strong Nate, it'll be okay." Lucas watched as her face fell and he left Lauren practising and sat beside Brooke.

"What is it?"

"It's definitely premature labour. In half the cases it stops on it's own but Haley hasn't. They're going to give her this drug, I can't remember what Nathan said it was, to stop the contractions. If it works it usually only works for a few days maybe a week."

"Will they give her another after that?"

"No. As well as that for Hales they're planning on giving the baby steroid injections to help the baby's lungs mature for delivery. It's likely she'll not last until 28 weeks, so she's extremely premature. The baby will need to go to a neonatal intensive care unit. Luke there's only 50% survival rate and of those that do survive there's around a 50% chance that it'll have cerebral palsy and some kind of learning difficulty. I just can't imagine how they're feeling right now." Lucas didn't say anything. He didn't think there was a single word that could be said. Silence descended on the pair as they watched Lauren throwing the ball through the hoop.

"Was Lauren early or on time?" Brooke smiled.

"She was 9 days late and I cursed her for it. Pregnancy is not what it's made out to be and I was ready for her come out a few weeks before she was due, so when the due date came and went I wasn't happy. If she'd waited much longer then the doctors were discussing inducing labour. It's strange that people just had babies at some point in history. Now there's all these drugs to bring labour on or stop labour."

"I know this is supposed to be supervised but we'll be fine if you want to go see her."

"I do."

"Then go." Brooke nodded and went over to Lauren to say goodbye. While Lucas was upset for Haley and Nathan he knew that this was a milestone both for him and Lauren and for him and Brooke. She was ready to let go and leave Lauren with just him. It seemed ironic that while things were going so well for him and his child they were going so bad for Haley and Nathan's baby.


	7. Preparation

**Thanks for the reviews just to clarify yes this is a Brucas story however there will be mentions of Leyton as there are issues that need dealing with there.**

"Hey tutor girl." Haley looked almost childlike in the hospital bed. She seemed so fragile and Brooke felt tears rising. Haley was like a sister to her now and she hated to witness the agony she was going through. Haley looked towards Brooke. Her face was marked with tear tracks but her eyes were empty. Brooke made her way to the bedside and sat next to her. She took hold of Haley's hand.

"I thought you were with Lucas and Lauren." Brooke gave a small smile.

"They didn't need me like you do." Those simple words brought Haley back to tears.

"Brooke this baby is too small this shouldn't be happening. The doctor said that since I was given the Indomethacin treatment instead of what they were originally planning on giving me that there's a chance labour will stop for a week or more. They say they can give me it for up to 72 hours before there will be any lasting effects on either me or the baby."

"That's good, you'll be like 28 maybe even 29 weeks. That's so much better."

"I know but it's still terrifying. Even if it happens and the baby is fine, I'm not ready to be a mom yet. I don't have anything ready I thought I had months to be there and I'm not." Brooke laughed.

"Honey you're never ready for a baby but all those practical things I can do. I know what you'll need."

"It seems stupid now but I wanted to be all traditional and old-fashioned like you were and not find out the sex but now it's like what clothes should I buy, what colour should the nursery be. But there's this part of me that says don't bother until you know there's a baby coming home."

"There is a baby coming home Haley James Scott. Don't ever think otherwise." Nathan came into the room just at that second.

"Brooke hey. Hales how are you feeling?" If Nathan was worried he didn't show it. Brooke admired him for how he was stepping up and being a man for Haley. She knew from speaking with him earlier he was as terrified as Haley was.

"A little nauseous but mainly tired."

"The doctor said that can happen honey, the drugs are relaxing your muscles you're meant to be tired." Brooke sometimes found it hard to see the Nathan she had known before Haley. The person he'd become under the influence and guidance of her love was a person of great strength and dignity. Brooke loved the couple more she could begin to say. She was given a new determination in that second to make their nursery the most amazing nursery there was for the baby Brooke knew would come home to it.

"Hales if you're tired I'm going to leave you to rest. Call me if you need anything." Brooke gave Haley a hug before turning to Nathan and doing the same.

"It'll be ok." She whispered in his ear before leaving them alone. Brooke stepped into the elevator her mind whirring. As she left the hospital she debated what the best course of action was. She decided to go the hardware store first, not because she didn't want to know her daughter was okay but because it meant delaying speaking to Lucas. Brooke arrived at her destination in record time – it was amazing how different her driving was without her precious child in the car. She went inside and strolled along the paint aisle debating which colour to choose when the most adorable wallpaper caught her eye. She knew without a doubt that it was exactly what should go in the Scott baby's nursery. Unfortunately she had absolutely no idea how to wallpaper. Nevertheless she purchased the paper and placed in it the back of her car along with the supplies the shop assistant had informed her she'd need. She drove to Haley and Nathan's house and let herself in with her key. Before attacking the wallpapering she decided to see how Lauren was getting on with Lucas and called him. He answered almost immediately sounding completely breathless.

"Hey I just wondered how Lauren was? Haley and Nate are doing as well as could be expected. I told Haley I'd do her a small favour so I'm actually at their place. Would you be able to bring Lauren here instead of taking her home?" Ok then I'll see you in an hour or so. Tell Lauren I love her." With that done Brooke searched for a bucket to make up some paste to hang the paper with. She dragged the step ladders she found in the garage up to the nursery and unwrapped the first roll. This couldn't be that hard surely! Ten minutes later both she and the paper – and parts of the floor were covered in the goopy mess that was supposed to stick the paper to the wall. And then she heard her daughter call her.

"Momma?"

"Up here." She tried to detangle herself from the mess she had created before Lauren came in but she only managed to make it worse and put her foot the in the bucket of paste just as the door opened. Both Lauren and Lucas burst into peals of laughter upon seeing her. She pulled her foot from the bucket and picked it up.

"If you two don't quit laughing at me this bucket of goop is going all over you." Lauren was unable to stop her giggles and Lucas barely concealed his smirk. Tempted as Brooke was to throw the stuff at them she needed it to get the paper up so managed to contain herself.

"Brooke what are you doing?" Lucas looked at her in wonderment and she cursed that he was here.

"Haley was really upset that she wasn't ready for the baby so I promised I'd get the nursery ready for her. I was going to paint it but I saw this wallpaper – it was so adorable I had to get it. But the truth is I've no idea how to put the stuff up." Lucas grinned.

"Well first off you're supposed to let the paper hang from the top of the wall and cut a strip off, not try and put it on the wall while it's on the roll. And second of all this is far too thick. It's also a good idea to have another bucket with a really thin paste to make sure the wall isn't dry so you can slide the paper around to get it in place. And a cloth to smooth it down with is a good idea too." Brooke stared at him incredulously. She was loathed to do what she was about to do but it was for Haley and Nathan.

"Would you happen to…you know…be able to…help?" Lucas gave her a curious look before taking off his jacket.

"Lauren why don't you go find me another bucket and a dry cloth. Brooke – go add about half a pint of water to this paste. Is there a match on the paper?"

"A match?"

"Yeah like a pattern that needs matching." Brooke shrugged.

"I didn't know I was supposed to look for one." Lucas sighed before shooing both girls from the room. Brooke returned a few minutes later to find Lucas had set up a tressle table and had begun to cut strips of paper from the roll. Lauren was mixing a watery version of the paste Brooke had in her own bucket.

"Can I help daddy?" Lucas' head spun to look at Lauren.

"Sure you can." Lucas took one strip to the table and laid it out. "How about you take this brush and use the paste your mom made to cover the paper." Lauren eagerly did as he said and Brooke stood back. Once the paper was covered Lucas briefly let his gaze rise to settle on Brooke. "When papering you always put your first strip in the centre of the wall so that when you're done there isn't a join in the middle." Brooke watched as he did just as he'd said. He held a pencil on a piece of string and Brooke realised it was to ensure the paper was straight. Once the first strip was up he turned to her. "How about you go along ahead of Lauren and me and use the thin paste to moisten the wall?" Brooke merely nodded. She acknowledged only to herself that without Lucas' help this was looking as though it would have been a huge disaster. They worked relatively silently for a while.

"Momma I'm hungry." Brooke glanced down at her watch to see it was gone 6pm.

"My gosh I didn't realise how much time had passed." She looked around the room and was impressed with how well they'd progressed. Another couple of hours and she thought they'd be done. "Since we're going so well as long as your father doesn't have plans how about I order pizza and we take a break to eat and then finish up. Maybe tomorrow we'll go see Auntie Haley and tell her what a good job you've done of decorating the nursery." Lauren's eyes lit up and she spun to Lucas.

"Daddy you've not got plans right?" Brooke suddenly felt awkward realising that she'd put Lucas in a bad situation. Her desire to finish the room had overridden her common sense and she figured that this wasn't how Lucas wanted to spend his evening.

"There's nothing I'd like more than to eat pizza with you honey. And it would be nice to get finished today so it can dry overnight. Then we can see what it looks like finished before you see Auntie Haley." Brooke let go of the breath she was holding. Lucas genuinely seemed to want to finish the papering as much as she did. She made a mental note to tell Haley how great he'd been. Their friendship was still frosty and she knew she was to blame. She wanted to make it right and she knew Lucas obviously cared.

"Can we get one with everything on it?"

"Even mushrooms?"

"Momma they're my favourite – you can pick them off." Brooke smiled.

"Ok then, you two carry on and I'll go order a pizza with everything on it." Lauren smiled happily as Brooke disappeared. Within minutes she was back and the trio went back to work. The doorbell interrupted them shortly after and Lauren bolted down the stairs with Brooke trailing behind. Lucas called after them.

"Save me some I'll just get this strip up so it doesn't dry."

"Sure." Brooke called back. She moved around Naley's kitchen as though it were her own. A testament to how much time she spent there. Lauren was settled with a slice on her plate while Brooke was making drinks for the three when Lucas came down. He slid onto the chair to the left of Lauren. Brooke handed him a glass of juice and settled one in front of Lauren.

"Thanks." He barely looked up at her when he said it. Brooke paused and watched him grab a slice of pizza.

"Actually – thank you. I think it's safe to say I was heading for disaster before you showed up." For the first time since Lucas found out about Lauren he looked Brooke straight in the eyes.

"Well despite everything I still love Hales – I couldn't let you destroy her nursery." Brooke was stunned at his words until she noticed the glint in his eye and the beginning of a smile on his face. She reached across and her hand clipped his head.

"That's cruel Lucas Scott." Lucas opened his mouth to respond but Lauren got there first.

"Is this what a family is?" Brooke couldn't find the words to give her an answer.

* * *

When they'd finally left Naley's the previous night Lauren had been exhausted. Lucas had carried her to Brooke's car and gently placed her inside. He'd wanted to see what their efforts had achieved in daylight and dry so Brooke had agreed to meet him back there at 10 the next morning to inspect their – or his – handiwork before she took Lauren to see Haley at the hospital.

It hadn't exactly been awkward last night, whether it was because of Lauren being there or because they were working on something for someone they both loved Brooke didn't know. But it was a relief. She acknowledged that now he knew of Lauren and was being a father to her they would inevitably have to be around one another.

She pulled into the driveway and saw Lucas sat on the front step waiting. His face was turned up towards the sun and Brooke glimpsed the boy she had fallen in love with. Lauren was out the car almost before Brooke had stopped it.

"Daddy!" She flung herself at Lucas who picked her up and swung her round. He placed her back down as Brooke joined them to open the door.

"Hey."

"Hey yourself." Brooke ducked her head down as she opened the door. They all made their way excitedly to the nursery. Brooke swung the door open and her mouth dropped. It looked amazing. The paper she had chosen was beautiful and Lucas had done a good job with it. "Wow." She breathed.

"Good choice Brooke."

"Momma the baby will love being in here. Maybe I should even give the baby one of my Pooh bears." Brooke smiled down at her daughter.

"I'm sure the baby would love that."

"I'll get everything cleared away if you want to take Lauren to the hospital." Brooke hesitated. It was one thing having Lucas in the house while she was there but was unsure about leaving him there. It's not like everyone was on good terms. But she reasoned it was Lucas and Haley loved him.

"Sure. I'll drop by later to lock up." The three bid their farewells as Lauren and Brooke left. Lauren was almost buzzing with excitement as they drew close to Haley's room in the hospital. She rushed towards her aunt and Nathan perched Lauren on the bed beside Haley. Brooke noted that she was looking better than the previous day. Brooke wanted to ask how they were doing but Lauren didn't yet know why her aunt was in the hospital. Brooke made eyes at Nathan and they excused themselves for a moment. Once outside the door Brooke reached a hand to his shoulder.

"How's everyone doing?"

"They're okay. Haley is feeling much better today which is good. The doctor said that labour seems to have stopped for now so it's just a case of preparing the baby as best they can. They did consider a caesarean section but they think Haley and the baby will both be able to handle a normal delivery and that if left there's a chance the baby will stay put for longer than if they hedged their bets and did a caesarean. So basically it's just a waiting game now. The doctor seems sure it won't be that long, though we're still praying for weeks rather than days."

"How are you holding up?" Nathan seemed surprised by her question and she guessed that he hadn't had time to even consider himself.

"I'm okay. I just need to keep Haley believing everything's going to be fine."

"It will be." Brooke pulled Nathan into a hug before they both went back inside. Haley turned towards them an inquisitive look on her face.

"Lauren's just been telling me about how she got to eat pizza for dinner last night and how she even got to eat dinner with her momma AND her daddy." Haley's eyebrows were raised and Brooke blushed. Nathan looked at her with a strange half-smirk.

"Did Lauren tell you about the nursery?" Haley didn't look like she could be distracted but Brooke knew that really Haley would be desperate to know.

"Oh Auntie Haley it's soooooooo nice. Momma chose some pretty Winnie the Pooh wallpaper. It's kinda yellowy but not like the sun. And it has Winnie the Pooh and Tigger and Eeyore and Piglet and Rabbit and Roo and Lumpy and trees on it."

"Wow that sounds great. I didn't know your momma knew how to wallpaper." Lauren giggled. Brooke shifted awkwardly.

"Well actually that's how we ended up having pizza with Lucas, he brought Lauren to your place and well it was chaos. I've no idea how to wallpaper – I didn't think it would be that hard but it was bordering on disaster until Lucas showed up. He really knows his stuff. He did a great job." Nathan gave Brooke a strange look.

"Lucas decorated the nursery?"

"Momma and I helped." Nathan smiled at his niece before turning his attention back to Brooke.

"Yeah he did, like I said it's really good too."

"But why?" Brooke turned to Haley to answer her question.

"He still loves you, it's obvious. He's really worried too." Haley looked away.

"Maybe he should visit me." Brooke nodded.

"I don't think he knows whether that's a good idea. But he asked me to keep him aware of any news." Haley nodded. Brooke knew how hard Haley had found Lucas leaving, even harder how his anger upon his return had caused such a breakdown in their friendship. Even with all the miles that had been between them both had still made a huge effort to keep their friendship going. Haley's doctor came in at that point.

"Hello Haley ready for some more injections?" Haley groaned.

"I think it's time Lauren and I left. I'll come by later Hales." Lauren hugged Haley and hopped down from the bedside. Nathan came to the door with them both. He took Brooke's hand and she felt the hardness in it. When he took his hand away she looked down. He'd left his credit card in her palm.

"I need it to be perfect, for our baby who IS coming home." Brooke smiled.

"As if I'd do anything less." Nathan smiled back at her before going back to Haley. Brooke needed to go back to Naley's house before she went shopping for some baby essentials. She'd told Lucas she'd go lock up and didn't want him waiting around. Lauren chattered away in the rear of the car the entire drive. She was so excited about getting a baby cousin. As she pulled her car into the driveway of Nathan and Haley's home Lucas opened the door. Lauren was out and over to him in a flash.

"Daddy uncle Nathan has told momma to go buy all the things for the baby and he gave her his magic card." Lucas laughed.

"His magic card really? Well your momma is probably really excited that she can go shopping and buy lots of nice things with someone else's magic card." He looked over Lauren's head to Brooke. "It'll be like old times." Brooke felt a stab of anger at his judgemental tone and words. True she'd done that with her father's money in high school – but the money was thrown at her to make up for never having them around. Besides she was different now.

"Daddy can you come shopping with us?" Brooke almost froze, yesterday had been bearable but she wasn't sure whether she could handle anymore time around Lucas. But then Lauren turned to her with her big blue eyes. "Can he momma?"

"Well honey your daddy might already have plans…but he can come if not." Brooke had been looking forward to creating the perfect nursery for Haley and now she felt her excitement wan at the prospect of Lucas joining them. But after he'd saved her yesterday with the wallpaper she didn't feel able to say no. Not that she'd be able to say no to Lauren anyway – she felt she constantly had to make up for what she'd deprived them both of.

"I don't have plans actually." Brooke drew in a deep breath.

"I guess you could be of use with any heavy lifting."

* * *

Despite Brooke's reservations shopping had still been exciting for her and as she once again surveyed not only the purchases she had been able to bring home but the ones in boxes men were currently delivering to the nursery 3 days later she acknowledged it had been a great success. Somewhere along the way Brooke was sure Lucas had become as invested in creating an amazing nursery for Haley as she was. She mused briefly about what others had thought of them as they had shopped. They probably assumed they were a family, but Brooke had seen the things none of the other shoppers would have noticed. She saw how Lucas' gaze flitted between herself and Lauren. She knew that he was thinking how much he'd missed out on because of her. The drive back to Naley's to drop off their purchases had been frosty, though Brooke didn't think Lauren, who had chatted ten to the dozen had noticed. Despite that though Lucas had been almost insistent on being there today when the rest of the items were delivered. Brooke hadn't admitted she was in truth grateful. She knew she'd need his help assembling the crib and the changing unit. Putting up the shelves for the display of the stuffed animals and the frames waiting to be filled. She idly wondered whether Lucas' dedication was for Haley's benefit or his own. She wondered if he was trying to create an idea of what it would have been like preparing a nursery for Lauren. Her musings were cut short as the delivery man asked her to sign for the items before disappearing leaving her with Lucas and Lauren.

"I think the crib seems the best place to start, I figure once we've got everything assembled we can figure where to put the big things before deciding on the shelves and pictures."

"Sure Lucas, sounds like a plan to me." Lucas had brought Keith's tools with him and together they set to building the crib. Lauren was in charge of relaying the instructions to them. Unsurprisingly it wasn't long until Brooke took over that particular job leaving Lauren to put in the bolts that would hold it all together – with a lot of help from her father.

Once the furniture was assembled they took a short break for lunch. Brooke was constantly on edge waiting for the call from Nathan to say Haley was in labour. She was heading towards the 28 week mark, which meant the baby's chances of survival were increasing. Brooke knew it couldn't hold out forever and this baby would certainly be very early, but the longer it rested where it was the better.

Brooke directed Lucas as he began to position the furniture, had they been on better terms they might have enjoyed and even teased one another about the constant moving and twisting of the furniture. But their exchange was getting terser with each movement. Brooke would be glad when the whole thing was done.

Once the furniture was in place and Lucas had securely attached the shelves to the walls he held Lauren up high enough to place one her precious – though many – Winnie the Pooh stuffed bears upon on of the shelves.

"That's perfect honey." Lauren grinned as Lucas placed her back down. The three stood and surveyed the room. It was indeed perfect, all it needed was a baby to fill it. There was one frame that took pride of place on the wall, the words emblazed underneath it read 'Me, Mommy and Daddy' Brooke was eager for the photo that would fill the frame. It was about time one of them finally had a happy family.


	8. The Other Scott Family II

Brooke lay silently in her bed, there was nothing new about that. She'd never really considered herself to be one of those people who craved their sleep – until Lauren was born. Suddenly when the sleep option was no longer there she desperately wished she could sleep. Over the years though her body had become attuned to her sleep/wake pattern and now she often woke before Lauren did. Unfortunately she was still confined to her bed as getting up would wake her daughter who was sleeping in the bed on the other side of the room.

Brooke had once or twice debated purchasing a sofa bed for the lounge but dismissed the idea uncomfortable with taking over more of Karen's space. But she was practical and knew that it wouldn't be long before she needed a permanent solution to the space issue. But she had no money to get somewhere for the two of them. It was something that plagued her. Sooner or later Lauren would want her own room, besides which it was getting harder and harder to find room for both their things in what had once been Lucas' bedroom. She could rent somewhere but she was concerned at what sort of place she could actually afford. In truth staying with Karen often seemed the easy option. When she was working Karen always had it arranged that she wasn't which meant one or the other was always there for Lauren. There was no disturbance to her routine if Brooke was opening or closing the café. She was still at home in her bed.

Brooke closed her eyes and tried to banish thoughts of impending room problems from her mind. Unfortunately for her that gave room for Lucas in her head. The finished nursery had been so lovely. Brooke was grateful for his help and had even given in to Lucas taking Lauren out on their own since then. She couldn't find any shock or surprise in her for how quickly her daughter had fallen in love with her father. Brooke yawned and stretched languidly in her bed. She'd managed to avoid any more 'family' time since finishing the nursery for which she was glad. They'd worked well together but now their project was over Brooke doubted it would be as easy to be around one another. The fact of the matter was that there were issues that wouldn't or couldn't go away.

Brooke's cell began to vibrate on her bedside table and she snatched it up.

"Hello?" Brooke sat up in bed upon hearing Nathan's voice. "Sure I can be there straight away Nate. It's going to be okay. The baby has lasted so much longer than anyone thought it would. Haley is almost 30 weeks now, the baby has had extra weeks not just days. I'll be there soon." Brooke shot out of bed as Lauren was rousing. Her frantic movements caused her daughter to become suddenly alert.

"Momma what's going on?" Brooke turned to her. She knew Karen was already at the café, she had one choice.

"I was just about to call your dad." Brooke flipped her phone open and dialled the number for Keith and Lucas' place. She greeted Keith warmly when he answered and asked for Lucas, only to be told that Lucas had gone for an early morning run. Once Brooke explained the situation Keith told her to drop Lauren off with him on her way to the hospital. Brooke breathed a sigh of relief, both of knowing her daughter was well cared for and that she would not have to see Lucas. She stuffed some of Lauren's clothes in a bag knowing it would take her daughter forever to get washed and dressed. It would be easier to let her get ready at Keith's. Once they were packed up Brooke set off for Keith's.

* * *

Brooke burst through the door she had been directed to. She had had a relatively easy labour but given the problems with Haley's she had no idea how quick labour would be. Haley was being examined as she went inside.

"Haley you're at around 8cm now so it won't be too much longer. I can give you a shot of pethadine for the pain now if you want it but otherwise it'll be too late and there will just be gas and air." Haley glanced over to Brooke.

"Have you had anything before now?"

"No she's just had a hot bath, but it's only been intense contractions for about 3 hours." Brooke felt awkward, no one could really tell anyone else how to handle their labour.

"Well honey I did have it, it made me feel much better, but if you've gone this far without anything you might be okay." Haley looked terrified. Brooke grasped her hand and squeezed. Nathan was on the other side holding her other hand. The midwife looked expectantly at Haley for an answer. Haley nodded her consent and the midwife disappeared, reappearing seconds later with the pethadine injection. Brooke glanced at the room and noted how many extra pieces of equipment was in there compared with when she'd had Lauren. She knew that every one of those items were to help this premature baby survive.

"How are you doing?" Brooke had been on tenterhooks daily waiting for the phone call. As the days had become a week she had even begun to hope that perhaps the baby had decided to wait until it was due. Brooke calculated Haley must be a couple of days shy of 30 weeks, a big improvement from when she was admitted to hospital just under 3 weeks earlier. At this stage 3 weeks meant a huge difference in what the baby's chances were.

"I'm okay. I'm scared." Brooke rubbed her shoulder.

"Honey it's going to be fine."

"More than anything though – I really need to pee." Brooke laughed and between her and Nathan they helped Haley to her feet and into the en-suite bathroom. With Haley behind the closed door Brooke gave Nathan a quick hug. She wasn't about to tell him but he looked awful. The stress and worry was piling up on him.

"Brooke?" Brooke panicked upon hearing Haley call her name sounding so helpless and unsure.

"Yeah honey."

"What does it feel like when your waters break?" Brooke's eyes went wide.

"Um well it feels like something popping inside of you then water just comes out, not like pee though." There was no response and Brooke and Nathan saw the panic on one another's faces.

"I um…I really feel like I need…"

"What Hales?" Nathan' voice didn't give away the worry to Haley and Brooke was impressed.

"I need the toilet." Nathan gave Brooke a quizzical look. Brooke smiled.

"You need it bad, like you just need to push it out?"

"Yeah." Brooke sighed.

"Don't!" She turned to Nathan and signalled to him to get a midwife. "Hales that feeling means the baby is coming. Is the door locked?"

"No." Brooke grabbed the handle and pushed the door open. Haley was stood hovering over the toilet looking almost fragile. Brooke went straight to her. She began to help her walk to the bed when Nathan and the midwife came in. Once Haley was back onto the bed the midwife came to her.

"Your husband tells me you think your water just broke and you want to push. Now I just need to examine you to see what's happening." The midwife did the examination and looked up at the three expectant faces. "It's time. Now I just need to call the paediatrics team and tell them the baby is coming, don't start pushing yet." The woman disappeared, with seconds she was back followed by a doctor and another midwife. "Okay what I need you to do is push when you feel a contraction and then stop when it goes. The baby has to get round a bit of a bend so it might feel like you're not getting anywhere but you are. Now when the baby's head starts coming out it's going to sting. If your two birthing partners can get you up because you'll need to bear down when you push." Nathan and Brooke pulled Haley almost into a sitting position. The room once again filled with more people, people they all knew were there for a premature baby.

* * *

Haley fell back against the pillows exhausted. The room held a flurry of activity while her part was over.

"I'm sorry we need to take her straight to paediatrics." Haley raised herself up slightly to look at the woman who had spoken.

"Her? She's a girl." Though her face was covered by a mask Haley knew she'd smiled.

"You have a daughter." As they rushed the baby from the room Haley fell back again.

"Nathan go with her, I'll stay with Haley." Nathan looked torn, desperate to follow and see how their baby was, just as sure his place was beside Haley. She looked up at him and nodded. He kissed her before disappearing. The midwife was cleaning around them.

"Come on Hales, let's get in the bath the midwife has run for you." Brooke knew the drill, mom goes in bath and comes out into a clean room that shows no indication of what had gone on. Brooke let Haley lean her tired body against her and helped her into the bathroom. She slipped the messy, over-sized t-shirt over Haley's head before helping her climb into the tub. She took the shampoo from Haley's bag and began massaging her friend's head.

"I didn't even see her." Haley's words sounded hollow.

"You'll see her soon. Once you're clean and you've been checked over I'm sure they'll let Nate wheel you up there to see her."

"It doesn't seem real. At least you had her in your arms afterwards, reality. I don't even know where my baby is." Brooke stood and reached for the shower head and turned it on letting the cold run near Haley's feet before rinsing the shampoo from her head.

"She's where she needs to be right now. Before you know it she'll be home and keeping you awake all night and this will be like a distant dream." As Brooke held a towel for Haley to wrap around herself she wished her words would be proved true. Haley stepped out the bath and sat on the side while Brooke dried her hair. Brooke ran a comb through her friend's locks before going and fetching clean nightwear from her bag. She helped Haley get dressed and then aiding her walk back to bed. As Brooke fluffed a pillow Nathan came back in. He smiled.

"She's perfect." Haley's head fell back and tears sprung to her eyes. "She's beautiful Haley and she's ours." Brooke smiled at the pair who hugged one another and dissolved into tears. "It's better than that she's breathing on her own." Brooke let out an enormous sigh of relief and the pair turned to her. They all just smiled. At that second one of the paediatric doctors came into the room.

"Mrs Scott how are you feeling?"

"I'm okay."

"Well you're daughter is very determined. She wanted nothing to do with the oxygen mask and has continued with her own breathing. It's very positive that there was no need for post-birth revival. We're still regulating her body temperature for her but that's more a precaution than anything else, it's likely that she'll be able to do that herself if she's developed enough to manage her own breathing. All the signs are very positive, including the fact that she's come in at a weight of 3lb 1oz, which is incredibly promising at 29 plus 5 weeks gestation. Now once your doctor has checked you over then I'm sure your husband can bring you up to see your daughter and I can discuss with you what the next few hours and days will entail." He nodded politely at them and smiled before leaving. Nathan perched on the bed beside Haley and held her hand while looking lovingly into her face. For Brooke this moment symbolised everything that was supposed to happen when two people became parents.

"Guys that's great news. I'm going to go tell Lauren and Karen the news. Call me and let me know how everything goes with the doctor." Brooke smiled and went to leave.

"Brooke." Brooke turned back as Nathan called her name. "I just need to thank you, for doing the nursery and for being so sure that our baby was going to be okay." She smiled.

"Me too Brooke, thank you so much." Brooke walked back inside the room to hug them both. When Nathan spoke again Brooke couldn't help but cry.

"And I'm sure that Hannah Brooke Scott would thank you too if she could."


	9. Birthday Girl

"Hey pretty girl." Brooke's head spun so fast to the owner of the voice she almost got whiplash. It had been years since Lucas had said those words. As she watched though she realised they were not aimed at her. It had been his name for her, what he called her and only her. But now those words obviously belonged to someone else. Brooke still smiled though. Her daughter was flinging herself across the yard to her father's waiting arms. It the words should pass to anyone Brooke was happy it was Lauren.

"Daddy! What took you so long?" Lucas grinned.

"I needed to make sure your present was just right."

"Is it a puppy?" Lucas grinned again. Lauren had talked of nothing else but a puppy for a few weeks now. He knew however that neither Brooke nor his mother would be happy had he given in to Lauren's talk.

"No it's not honey, but I'm sure you'll still really like it. How is my favourite girl on her birthday?" Lucas was knelt looking at her intently. This was the first moment he had been here to share with her and he didn't want to lose a moment.

"It's ok, but momma won't let me open my presents until after we have cake." Lucas smiled wishing that something so small could be the biggest problem in his life.

"Well isn't your momma mean to you." Lauren shook her head.

"My momma isn't mean, just today, but she has got me some good presents I think. And she's throwing me this really good party and she's got me a cake with a princess on it."

"Wow well in that case I think we can forgive her for not letting you open your presents right now." Lauren nodded her head.

"Wanna come on the bouncy castle daddy?"

"You go play with your friends baby girl, I'm just going to see grandma and then I'll come find you." Lauren kissed his cheek before running off into the chaotic fray. Lucas smiled as he watched her go. She really was adorable. He made his way across the yard careful to avoid being near Brooke. She'd called him after Haley had had the baby but since then they'd not spoken or seen one another. Since Lauren had started back at school last week they'd not even had to manage an awkward collection. Lucas always dropped Lauren at the café with his mom at closing and she took her home. It was sad in a way Lucas surmised. He knew Lauren had really enjoyed their time together while preparing the nursery for baby Hannah. He just didn't feel ready to move past his anger towards Brooke. She was avoiding him as well so she must feel the same about not being ready to be around him, though he couldn't understand her feelings unless it was shame. He stepped inside the house to greet his mother.

"Hey ma, you okay?" Karen turned round and looked at her son.

"I'm fine Luke, I just miss your uncle Keith. I guess I got used to having him around again. It's strange now he's back in Charlotte." Lucas reached a hand to his mother's arm.

"He's planning on visiting in a couple of weekends time. Now visiting Tree Hill is allowed." He'd meant it to lighten the mood, an attempt at a joke. But his tone hadn't managed and it fell flat, falling in the space between them stifling them both. Haley walked in the door then. Despite the fact that he'd picked up the phone to call her a hundred or so times since she'd been in hospital and subsequently returned home he'd not spoken to her or seen her. He'd managed a flower bouquet with a card congratulating her and Nathan but something had held him back from more.

"Karen Brooke has sent me for some more napkins." Karen handed them into Haley's outstretched arm. Just as Haley was about to disappear outside Lucas spoke.

"Haley how is Hannah doing?" Haley turned to Lucas with a quizzical look. She was angry with him that much he could tell. He could even understand it. She'd been through a lot lately and he had been too hurt and too stubborn to put aside his own feelings and visit or call her.

"She's fine." Haley answered him tersely before going outside. Lucas groaned. He'd screwed up.

"Hannah is not only breathing on her own but she's feeding too. She's doing really well, very good signs." Lucas smiled gratefully at his mother.

"I don't know how to be here anymore. I don't fit and I spend most of my time alone with nothing to keep me busy." Karen gave him a sad look.

"I know it's hard Luke, but you made the decision to stay here for a reason. Maybe it's time you actually committed yourself and found a job."

"I had a job lined up as an intern at a publishing house in New York. I was going to see if I could get my novel read while I was working there."

"I can see the logic in your plan, but perhaps if you still want to write you should try getting it read the old fashioned way." His mother was right he should still pursue his dream of being a writer. He could write in Tree Hill as much as he could in Charlotte or New York. As his mother busied herself Lucas found himself outside watching the children play. He just wasn't part of this world. A world of school friends parents who knew one another. His own best friend now so distant. There was only one person in Tree Hill he felt able to have an actual conversation with. It was a sad thought. He watched as Nathan came rushing to Haley panic written all over his face. He heard him telling her a nurse had called and asked them to come to the hospital. He watched as Brooke and his mother offered words of comfort as they rushed off. It was clear to see on Brooke's face how worried she was, yet it was obvious she was determined nothing would ruin Lauren's birthday.

"Cake time, everybody come over here." As Brooke gathered the children round the small table Lauren ran over and grabbed his hand bringing him to her side awaiting the cake. Lauren grabbed Brooke's hand and the three were lined up as his mother brought the cake over. He glanced down at his daughter and saw her focusing on him and Brooke and not the cake. As she saw his looking at her she smiled.

"I know what my wish is daddy." Any words he could say back would have been drowned out by the singing of Happy Birthday. She blew the candles out and her eyes shot back up to her parents. It didn't take a genius to realise what she'd wished for. It made sense really. She was beginning to understand the dynamics of a normal family. She loved them both, it was natural she'd want to have them both around full time. He wished it was that simple. Brooke disappeared inside with the cake ready to cut it up and place it in the pre-prepared party bags. Lauren followed her and came back out eyes gleaming. Within minutes Brooke was back and ushering everyone to the mountain of presents. Lauren showed unbridled joy as she ripped her way through the paper to the presents they held. He waited with baited breath for her to find his. He hoped she would love it – despite the fact it wasn't a puppy. It was the last present to be reached. She grinned as she read who it was from. She began to take the paper off to reveal a book, on the cover of the book was a giant silver swan and a small brunette girl. 'Lauren and the Silver Swan.' She opened the cover and there it was – To Lauren I wrote this book just for you. Love daddy. Her eyes went to his and she ran to him book in hand.

"You like it baby?" She hugged him tightly.

"Will read it to me tonight before bed?"

"I sure will." His mother came out the house then her face almost split in two with the enormous smile.

"Haley just called." His attention spun to her as he noticed did Brooke's. "Hannah is coming home today." He wondered if he imagined the tears in Brooke's eyes as she hugged his mother for they were gone as she pulled away.

"That's so amazing." Brooke said with relief. Lucas too was relieved and happy for Haley and Nathan, but he felt unable to join in with them. It no longer felt like his right.

* * *

He closed the book quietly and slipped from the room. Lauren was asleep after just a few pages. She'd had a long and exciting day. It was the first time he'd ever been able to tuck her in at night, the first birthday they'd shared. For Lucas the day was as close to perfect as could be. As he pulled the door to he looked up to find Brooke.

"It was a very thoughtful and well planned gift Lucas." He nodded but didn't reply. This was leading somewhere he could tell by the tone of her voice. "Your mom said you liked to write – I didn't realise you did your own illustrations too. You really are multi talented because they were marvellous."

"You know Peyton did them for me."

"I do. I'm surprised it didn't say the gift was from both of you." Lucas bit back his anger not wanting to wake Lauren.

"It was my idea, my words, my gift. Peyton did me a favour and drew a few pictures. I put it together and got it bound for her. Her part was pretty small." Lucas challenged Brooke with his gaze. He couldn't tell what it was he saw in her eyes before she brushed past him. He went into the kitchen and bid his mother a quick goodbye desperate to leave that house. His feet carried him to the place he wanted to be.

"Two shots." The bartender looked up and knew Lucas was the owner's son. He served the drinks and went off to a group of females that were obviously having fun. Lucas' plan was simple. Get wasted. He wanted to forget it all. He wanted to forget that he'd screwed up in high school, that Brooke, his mother and his best friend had lied to him, that he'd missed 5 years of his child's life. The part he would never admit was there he also needed to forget – the fact that it hadn't escaped his attention that Brooke Davis had grown more beautiful over the years. He needed to blot that idea out, along with the fact that part of him had enjoyed being with her and doing the nursery. Helping Brooke help Haley felt familiar, it felt like home. And he wanted to forget all of that.

"Has anyone ever told you that you should never drink alone?" He glanced up to see Peyton. She slipped into the seat beside him and signalled for another 4 shots to be brought over.

"What are you doing here?" She shrugged.

"The music. How was the party?" He shrugged.

"It was a children's party."

"Did Lauren like her present?" He smiled at the look on her face when she'd realised what it was.

"I think so. She asked me to read her it for her bedtime story – she was wiped out after a few pages. Hopefully Brooke will let me finish it one night soon."

"You should really see someone about your rights Lucas, get something set in stone so she can't screw you over again. After all she did threaten to up sticks without a word if you found out." Yeah true she had done that, but she'd been insistent that she hadn't meant it and his mother had said the same. Besides if that had been her plan she wouldn't have let Lauren get so attached to him.

"I'm done for the night Peyton. I'll see you around." He got up and flung some money on the bar before walking away. Peyton confused him. He didn't want confusion right now, he wanted oblivion. No doubt there's Keith's stash at home. Oblivion in his own home was a much better option. Maybe he'd figure out Peyton one day, but it wasn't today. He didn't care enough right now.

**This chapter was a bit of a filler chapter to get to the next important part of the story. I've been working on that part so there are a couple of chapters ready to go straight up.**


	10. Nothing Is As It Should Be

Lucas rolled over and his hand batted around on the bedside table for a few minutes before he cracked an eye open. His brain slowly realised it wasn't his bedroom. His hand reached further down and picked his cell off the floor. Confused and half asleep he fell back and closed his eyes again before answering the call.

"Yuh." He mumbled out something that resembled a greeting.

"Lucas?" Brooke's terrified voice said his name and in an instant he was wide awake and sitting up. Brooke would never call him that much he knew, so for her to be doing exactly that and sounding so scared was causing him panic.

"What's wrong?"

"I can't get in touch with your mom and I really need her." Lucas would put money on the fact that Brooke was seconds away from crying. "Luke it's Lauren, can you come please? We're at the hospital and I just can't reach Karen." Panic surged through him.

"Don't worry about a thing I will be there before you know it." He hung up and sprung out of bed. As he was pulling on his jeans Peyton sat up.

"Lucas what's happening?" Peyton voice was filled with sleep. "It's 2am. Who's calling you?"

"It was Brooke, Lauren's in hospital. She can't reach my mom." Peyton sat up.

"So if she had been able to contact Karen you wouldn't know Lauren was in hospital." Lucas looked over to her but didn't stop dressing.

"It doesn't matter."

"Of course it does, you have rights Luke and once again it seems Brooke wasn't thinking of you at all. This is why you need to go to court and get things set in stone."

"Peyton! Now is not the time for this." Lucas was almost through the bedroom door before Peyton called out to him.

"Let me know how she is." The front door slamming followed by silence was her response.

* * *

As the elevator doors opened he saw her pacing the floor.

"Brooke." Upon hearing her name she stood still and turned to him.

"Oh Lucas thank god you're here." Brooke face was lined in tear tracks and he was surprised when she flung herself into his arms. "Luke I'm so scared and they're not telling me anything and I can't reach your mom." Lucas put his arms gingerly around Brooke, unsure of what to do at this juncture. He'd never seen Brooke Davis anything less than resolutely strong. He pushed her gently away from him and looked at her face.

"Brooke what happened?" She sighed and sank into a nearby chair. He took the one beside her and waited for her to speak.

"You know how she's not been eating that much lately. I just put it down to stress about everything and maybe being a little under the weather nothing serious. Then yesterday she said she couldn't breathe properly. But we sat together for a little while and then she fine. I guess I thought things are so rocky right now it was all related to that. Just a reaction. But tonight she just seemed really off and wanted to sleep. So she went to lay down. I went to check on her, her breathing was so swallow and her lips were blue. I called 911 straight away. I've been calling your mom since 11, where the hell is she? We need her." Lucas tried not to be angry that Brooke had been calling his mom for 3 hours before she'd called him. Of course she'd prefer his mother there to him but he was Lauren's father. Peyton's voice repeated in his head and he wondered if she'd have called at all if she'd had his mother with her. "It's all my fault I should have known there was more to what was wrong before tonight." Lucas sighed, angry as he was at Brooke, for everything. He knew she loved their daughter more than life and it was certainly not her fault.

"Brooke this isn't your fault. There are hundreds of reasons kids go off their food. Something as simple as a cold could have explained the not eating, tiredness, even struggling to breathe. It's not your fault."

"Why is no one telling me what's happening to my baby?" Tears slipped silently down Brooke's cheeks and Lucas realised why she had been so desperate to have Karen there, he just couldn't provide the comfort she needed.

"I'm going to go try my mom again for you, then I'll find a doctor and figure out what's going on." Brooke nodded. Lucas went off in search of a pay phone, he glanced back before he turned the corner of the corridor. She looked so small sat there, so fragile. Lucas tried his mother's house and the café with no luck. But it was obvious Brooke really needed his mother there. He briefly thought about calling Haley to see if she'd any idea where his mother could be but dismissed the idea instantly. It wasn't a good time to call her home. His uncle Keith however wouldn't mind being disturbed and would be happy to search for Karen. Lucas dialled his number.

"Hello?" A sleepy, groggy voice answered.

"Keith it's me Lucas. I'm at the hospital with Brooke. It's Lauren. Something's wrong. But Brooke really needs my mom here. I can't reach her at home or the café, could you maybe see if you can track her down somewhere." Lucas was desperate at this point. He'd no idea what he'd say if he couldn't relay at least one positive thing to Brooke.

"Hold on Luke." Lucas heard some muffled talking in the background.

"Lucas." His mother's voice greeted him and he had the briefest of seconds to wonder why she'd be at his uncle Keith's at 3am before he spoke.

"Mom can you come to the hospital? Brooke's been here 4 hours and no one is saying a word. I think that must mean it's bad. She's really desperate to see you."

"I'm on my way Luke, tell Brooke I won't be long honey." Lucas hung up and made his way back to Brooke. She jumped up when she saw him. She raised her eyebrows for news.

"I got her, she's coming." Brooke released a sigh. They both sat again, neither spoke. Neither knew what to say. Things had become easier in the last few weeks but they were no where near close to being comfortable around each other. There were so many issues and so many things left to say. The sound of rushing feet caused both to look up. Karen and Keith were rushing from the elevator to them. Lucas couldn't help but notice their hands were entwined. As they reached them Karen's arms reached out and Brooke fell helplessly into them sobbing. Lucas felt a strong sense of envy that Brooke should be the one to receive the comfort from his mother. He admitted to himself for the first time that he missed the closeness of the relationship he'd once shared with his mother. Keith hugged Lucas tightly to him.

"She'll be fine." The sound of a voice being cleared ended the hugging as all four turned to the doctor.

"Miss Davis?" Brooke nodded, her hand clasped tightly in Karen's. "Would you like to sit down?" Brooke shook her head. "Miss Davis we've identified what is known as a heart murmur in your daughter. There are two types of heart murmur, one type is what's known as an 'innocent' murmur, and the other is an 'abnormal' one. It's an extra noise heard in the heartbeat rhythm. Now an 'innocent' murmur is caused by an increased blood flow in the heart, this can be due to something as simple as a fever. However an 'abnormal' murmur is a sign of something more serious, usually a congenital heart defect. Now all we know at this stage is that there is a murmur, however we need to do some tests on Lauren in order to discover what the cause of the murmur is." Brooke sank into a chair. She didn't speak a word leaving Lucas to question the doctor.

"If it is 'abnormal' what sort of defect is likely?" The doctor looked at him.

"Well Mr…"

"Scott, Lucas Scott. I'm Lauren's father." The doctor nodded

"Well Mr Scott the most common defect that would cause a murmur would be either a congenital septal defect or a congenital valve defect. Basically either a hole in the heart or leaking or narrow valves that restrict blood flow." It was Lucas' turn to sit in stunned silence.

"Doctor how likely is it that Lauren has an 'innocent' murmur rather than any major problem?" The doctor looked down away from the older man questioning him. It was never easy telling a family that a young child had such a serious problem.

"Given the presenting symptoms and the fact Lauren has not had any of the illnesses one would normally associate with an 'innocent' murmur it's unlikely that it's as simple as there. But we really don't know until we run more tests." They all knew what he was really saying. With or without the tests the doctors seemed fairly certain that Lauren did indeed have a serious heart condition.

"If she does have a defect?" Brooke's voice shook as she spoke.

"It's difficult to say at this point. It very much depends on what defect it is and how severe a case she has. But there is still a chance that there is nothing untoward."

"I saw my baby girl barely breathing and turning blue, I think it's fairly safe to say there is little chance it's not serious." Brooke's tears were falling again and Karen placed an arm round her. The doctor said nothing, he waited a few moments before excusing himself. "Karen." She got no further than the older woman's name before she cracked completely. Lucas watched her fall apart in his mother's arms and felt strangely detached from both Brooke and the situation. It felt as though this whole thing was happening to someone else. It was nearing a more reasonable hour of the day so he excused himself to call Haley. He didn't go straight the pay phone however he walked through the corridors. He had somehow made his way to the room where his daughter was being tested. She was unconscious still and for that he was thankful. She seemed like a doll, so perfect. He couldn't believe that he had only just got to know her and now there was something so enormous threatening her life. He walked away unable to watch and made his way to the pay phone. The phone was answered after one ring and he did feel guilt that it was still just 6.30am.

"Yes?" The voice was terse and he could hear a baby screaming in the background. He opened his mouth but no words came out, just a sob. "Who is it?" He swallowed and pulled himself together to respond.

"Hales it's me." He could hear the annoyed sigh coming down the phone.

"Hang on." He could hear her calling Nathan to take the baby. It must certainly seem strange to her that he'd be calling. They'd not spoken much since he'd been back in Tree Hill. When they had seen each other Lauren had been there, she was their buffer. "What?"

"I just thought you'd want to know, Lauren was admitted to hospital last night." All traces of annoyance and tiredness disappeared from Haley's voice when she replied.

"What happened Luke?" He swallowed again trying to keep himself composed. When he did speak his voice was thick with the tears he didn't want to shed and Haley could hear them.

"She has a heart murmur. They're running tests now to see if it's an 'innocent' murmur or a symptom of a heart defect." As Lucas said the words the truth of the situation seemed undeniable and he was devastated.

"Oh my god. How's Brooke doing?"

"Not so great. My mom and Keith are here though."

"Lucas I'm so sorry. About everything, it all seems so wasteful of our energy now. It's like what happened happened and we can't change it and we should make the most of what we have. I know there are so many bridges to build right now. And I know that your mom and Keith are there but I guess Brooke's getting a lot of support from them. Lucas I want you to know I still love you and if you need me I will be there." Lucas wiped a tear from his eye. Right now he couldn't feel any anger towards Haley for the past, she was right it was done. All that mattered was Lauren and making sure she'd be okay.

"Thanks Hales it means a lot. I should get back. I'll call you later. Bye." He leaned back against the wall trying to gather himself before going back. He made his way over to them. Brooke stepped towards him.

"The doctor said we can go see her now, just two people. Did you want to come with me?" They both knew Brooke would prefer Karen by her side. It meant a lot to Lucas that she'd asked him though. He desperately wanted to see Lauren. He nodded and she began to walk away. He followed. The bed dwarfed the small girl and it was heartbreaking to see her hooked up to so many machines. Brooke sat in the chair beside her bed and took her hand. "Lauren baby, it's mommy. I'm right here with you sweetheart, I promise won't leave you…daddy's here too baby girl." Lucas took the chair the other side of the bed and took Lauren's other hand.

"Hey kiddo, mommy and I are going to be right here as long as you need us." Lucas and Brooke looked at one another, a peace settled between them for now.

* * *

"Hey you two." Lucas turned to look at his friend who walked in. "I know you probably don't want it but I brought you both something to eat. Karen said you've not had anything for 2 days now." Brooke stood and moved to hug Haley.

"Thank you Haley, but I'm not really up to food. I just want these stupid test results to come back." Haley rubbed soft circles on Brooke's back.

"I know you do honey." As if her words had summoned him the doctor appeared in the doorway.

"Miss Davis, Mr Scott. I have the results back." Lucas stood and stepped forward while Brooke broke away from Haley. Brooke's hand was in Haley's while Haley grabbed Lucas' hand with her other. "Unfortunately it's what was suspected. I'm afraid Lauren's heart murmur is an 'abnormal' murmur. Now I've arranged for a paediatric cardiologist to come down and see Lauren. That will mean there will be more tests as he'll need to unearth exactly what is causing Lauren's murmur. My colleague Dr Walsh should be here sometime this afternoon. After he has seen Lauren she'll be taken for the tests before being transferred to the paediatric cardiology ward. For the moment I'm going to keep her in her sedated, given the circumstances not knowing what exactly we're dealing with the coma is giving Lauren's body, her heart a rest so to speak. It means she's not aware of what's happening and so she's not worried therefore there is no undue stress to her heart. Again I'm so sorry." He nodded towards them before vacating the room leaving the 3 adult occupants stunned. No words came for any of them, so they stood hand in hand, together. It wasn't long before Karen appeared at the door and found them like that. She knew without asking that the results were back and they weren't good.

"Lucas can I speak with you, outside?" He nodded and followed his mother out the door. "Peyton's downstairs." He sighed.

"She was there when Brooke called, she asked me to let her know what was happening and I just forgot I guess." Karen didn't say a word to give her son about her thoughts on Peyton being there.

"I guess you should go see her then. I'll stay with Brooke and Lauren, I doubt Haley will be leaving anytime soon either." He nodded they went their separate ways. Peyton rushed towards him as he walked towards her.

"Lucas what's happening?" He took a deep breath and she placed both hands on his chest. "Luke is she ok?" He shook his heart.

"She has a heart murmur and the tests just came back to show that it's a symptom of a serious problem. She has a heart defect Peyton." She pulled him into her arms and didn't say a word. She too felt a great sadness that the little girl she'd watched grow up was so seriously ill. Before she was able to say anything Haley's voice interrupted them and Lucas pulled sharply away from her.

"Luke the cardiologist is here." Haley disappeared back towards Lauren's room and Lucas cast a glance at Peyton before following her. He was being incredibly dismissive of Peyton right now but her presence here would just make things worse. Besides which he had no idea how to approach the mess he'd made of the previous night. He trudged towards Lauren's room not really wanting to hear what the doctor had to say. He was stunned by how quickly he had fallen in love with his daughter and it was killing him that she was so ill. He took a deep breath before stepping inside.

"Mr Scott – as I was saying to your family I'll be sending down my team shortly to begin some tests on your daughter. The quicker we establish the problem the better it is for Lauren. I assume my colleague Dr Reed has explained to you why we feel it's best for Lauren to keep her sleeping for now." Sleeping – it seemed far too innocent a word for what was happening to his daughter.

"Dr Walsh I thought heart defects were tested for in routine checks at birth." The doctor took off his glasses and sighed.

"Mr Scott a heart defect would only be tested for if there was underlying reasons to do so. If a murmur had been detected in the routine check then tests would be undertaken. A murmur is sometimes rather hard to find in such a young infant. If the child were particularly distressed by the examination then it may make the murmur harder to hear. There are cases where heart defects causing murmurs can occur after birth, those are usually associated with bacterial infections or aging, which obviously isn't the case for Lauren."

"I'm just trying to figure out how no one knew, she turned 5 two weeks ago why is it happening now?" Dr Walsh shook his head.

"Until I know what is causing the problem Mr Scott I couldn't begin to explain 'why now?' I'm sorry." Dr Walsh left the room.

"I should have known something – I'm her mother it's my job to know."

"Brooke honey you cannot blame yourself. I spent almost as much time with Lauren as you have, and I've more child experience than you do and I had no clue."

"Yeah Brooke this was inside of her with no symptoms, you couldn't have known." Lucas didn't say a word. Deep down he agreed wholeheartedly. Brooke shouldn't blame herself if the doctors hadn't picked up a problem then why would she have done so. But he couldn't bring himself to tell her that.

* * *

"Ok you two, you've both been here for 4 days now. You've not eaten and you've barely slept. Keith and I are going to stay here for today and the two of you are going to go home and…" Brooke cut Karen off.

"I can't leave her."

"Brooke we'll be here, if the results come back we'll call you. But it won't do her any good to wake up and find the two of you like you are. You need to be strong for her which requires food and rest. Go home, shower, change, eat, rest and come back tonight." Lucas knew his mother was right. He took a look at Brooke and wondered if he looked as bad as she did. If so they'd best sort themselves out otherwise Lauren would be terrified of them both if she woke up. Karen pulled Brooke from the chair and she offered little resistance. She propelled them both to the door. "Lauren will be fine, we won't leave her." Brooke nodded before hugging Karen goodbye. As the two made their way to the elevator it dawned on Lucas that if Brooke had ridden in the ambulance with Lauren then she had no way of getting home.

"You need a ride?" Brooke looked up at him through tired eyes. The fight seemed just to have left her and she nodded. They rode down to the ground floor in silence. Both blinked and were taken aback by the blinding sunlight. As Lucas started to make his way over to the parking lot Brooke placed a hand on his arm. He stopped and turned to her.

"Can we sit for a second?" She motioned to a nearby bench and he made his way to it. She sat beside him wordlessly for a few minutes before surprising him by hugging him. True she'd flung herself into his arms when he'd first arrived at the hospital but they'd barely spoken let alone touched since then. "Thank you for being with us every second."

"Yeah well I am her father." Brooke nodded and drew back as if bitten. He instantly regretted it.

"I know there's a lot to sort through in all your relationships, with your mom and Haley. Our relationship as Lauren's parents. But I just wanted to say…to ask if we could lay it all aside. I know that's a big thing to ask of you. I don't mean forever but just until Lauren's better. Lucas she's so sick and…" Brooke broke off as she started to cry again. "We need to be strong for her, as a unit. As a family, her family." Brooke was right, no matter what personal issues they may all have with one another above all they all loved Lauren and she needed them right now.

"It's not a big ask Brooke. It's exactly what we should do. Lauren is the priority." Brooke nodded. Her hands came up to cover her face as the damn in her broke.

"What am I going to do if my baby dies Lucas? She's the only thing I have in this world. I love her so much." Lucas pulled Brooke to him and cradled her against him.

"She won't die Brooke. Lauren is like the two women in her family. She is one of the strongest people I know, she'll fight this and she'll win because she's a survivor. Just like her grandma and just like you."

**Finally some Brucas sort of. At least they do not hate each other right now. I'm not sure if I'm getting all the details right of Lauren's condition but I'm doing my best.**


	11. Watching Yesterday

"So what have you been doing since you left?" Their vigil had begun again the previous night and mainly they had talked about Lauren. While Brooke was utterly devoted to her daughter she needed more than that.

"I don't think I'm comfortable talking about mundane things with you Brooke." She nodded and looked away from him. She understood, but understanding didn't make her need less great.

"Lucas I need something to talk about that isn't speculating over what is going to happen to her?" Her eyes pleaded with him.

"Keith and I were so undecided about staying, a few times we were ready to pack up and come home. Then school started. Keith loved the job he was doing and it really helped us both that we weren't Dan Scott's family. As much as we both missed home it was freeing to be away from him and his legacy. Plus I liked that no one knew me. I wasn't Dan's son. Nathan's brother. I wasn't the guy who screwed 2 girls over simultaneously. We made a life there. Then when I finished high school I just went to the college, I actually got in on a basketball scholarship. But I really found my place in English class. I wrote a novel. I came to see my mom to tell her that I'd been offered a year's internship at a publishing house in New York. I figured that if I worked in publishing maybe I'd get lucky and someone would read my book." He looked away from her then. Obviously he'd turned down the internship when he showed up and saw Lauren. Exactly one of the reasons she'd kept her a secret. She didn't like being the one responsible for taking his dreams away from him. As she had justified back in high school ultimately it was her decision to have Lauren, she knew that her life would change. Lucas was pushed into that place. He'd had no choice.

"So what about you, besides Lauren." Brooke licked her lips and debated what to say. She didn't want him to know how her life had turned out. But he'd been honest with her and she figured it was time she started doing the same with him.

"I had to work at your mom's café to pay her for taking care of us, and to get things for Lauren. Poor kid never really got the things other kids got. After high school I started night school. I take an art class. I'm not into drawing or anything but it helps me to find ways to get what's in my head onto paper. I'd love the chance to design but it probably won't happen. Your mom says if I finish the course and work my ass off to make enough stuff she'd consider leasing premises for me to open a store here for my work. I don't think I've really got time with working and Lauren to make my designs come to life." Brooke had once dreamed that after high school she'd move to New York and pursue her dream of becoming a major designer. But her dream had died when she seen the positive pregnancy test. The knowledge that she was pregnant by the boy who had broken her heart had devastated her. She'd known instantly she'd never be able to get rid of the baby. It was less a choice to keep her child and more the lack of other options. She'd not be able to face an abortion. She'd known that even then. So there she was a mother at just 17.

"You could always find a new dream – Nathan did." Brooke nodded. She'd seen how destroyed Nathan had become in senior year when an injury meant that he'd never play the game he loved professionally. Both she and Haley had worried that he'd not recover emotionally from the devastation of a lost dream. But he'd gone to college and studied sport. Whitey ever the coach both on and off the court had helped him see there was more to life than basketball. That he should be grateful he had Haley – Whitey would have given up the game to have his Camilla back. Nathan took more than just an appreciation for his wife from that speech. He'd taken a desire to be to a new generation of players what Whitey had been for him and the team. He was more than a coach he was a mentor. After he'd graduated Nathan had taken a job at college as assistant coach, then two months later when the job for head coach came up at Tree Hill High he'd applied not thinking he'd enough experience to get it. But Principal Turner had remembered Nathan Scott and given him a chance. Brooke was happy for both Nathan and Haley. They were both achieving dreams – neither dream was where they had originally wanted to be but she knew neither regretted the decision that got them where they were. But the careers they'd ended up in had been obvious choices for them both. Brooke had no such 'obvious choice' before Lucas she'd been a party girl who'd wanted to design. After Lucas she'd been a mother and there was little else in between.

"I wouldn't know where to start." Brooke felt uncomfortable having shared so much with Lucas and wondered whether she'd have been better sticking to discussing Lauren. "So how long have your mom and Keith been an item?" Lucas shook his head and smiled.

"Well first I knew about anything was when I called Keith from the hospital to see if he'd look for her and she was there." Brooke laughed for the first time in days.

"I can't believe I called you and you rushed here without even realising your mom was in the same apartment." She smiled. Then she noticed he wasn't smiling. He looked incredibly awkward. "What?"

"I wasn't technically there that night…I was at Peyton's." Brooke felt like someone had stuck a knife in her heart. While it had been years ago the two had betrayed her and broken her heart to know they'd picked up where they left off now Lucas was back in town distressed her. The conversation stopped then and an awkward silence covered the room. What little progress they'd made while Lauren had been in hospital had been shattered and they both knew it. So when the door opened minutes later both were relieved. Haley's face appeared in the doorway followed by Nathan.

"Deb has Hannah so we thought we drop by and see how you were all doing, if there was any news?" Brooke shook her head. "Brooke why don't you come for a walk with me, just for 10 minutes get some fresh air. Lucas and Nathan will be here." Brooke didn't want to leave her daughter but she did need air after Lucas' revelation. She stood and followed Haley out the door while Nathan took her vacated seat.

"Jeez man what was going on in here? I needed a chainsaw to cut the tension let alone a knife." Lucas rubbed a hand across his forehead.

"I told Brooke I was at Peyton's the night Lauren was admitted." Nathan stood and turned to look out the window. He could just make out his wife and their friend.

"You're a jackass you know that. As if she isn't going through enough." Lucas stood too, angry that he was being judged so unfairly.

"Hey! It came up, I could have lied to her but I didn't see that helping things. Nathan it was one night and I regret it happening." Once again the two brothers were at war with one another.

"Look Luke." Nathan started to speak and then turned and sat back beside Lauren. He lounged back in the chair and waited for Lucas to follow suit. "Did you date anyone in Charlotte?" Lucas had no idea where Nathan was headed.

"Yeah a few girls."

"Anyone special?" Lucas shrugged.

"There was one girl, Anna, it might have turned into something but her parents moved so that was that." Nathan nodded along with what his brother was saying.

"Haley, Karen and I have all offered to watch Lauren so Brooke could go on a date. And she's Brooke Davis, she's pretty hot. Yet do you wanna know who the last guy she went out with was?" Nathan paused. "It was you Lucas. There's been no one since you. It's not because she hasn't had offers, or chance, she tries to say it's because no guy our age is ready for her and a daughter but we know she's lying. The truth is she won't date anyone because she is terrified that if she lets anyone near her they will hurt her – just like you did. That is why no matter how many years pass you and Peyton will ALWAYS be like a bullet to her heart, whether it's one night or forever doesn't matter to her." Lucas didn't respond, there was nothing he could say. Brooke and Haley came back in then. Lucas stood immediately and went to Brooke. He took both her hands gently in his own.

"Brooke, about Peyton. This isn't just now either, it's back then too. I just want to say I'm really sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

"I know, but it doesn't really matter Lucas, in the end it all hurts just the same." Brooke took her hands away from his and before any more words could be spoken Lauren's paediatric cardiologist walked in. Brooke searched until she grasped Haley's hand and Nathan stood and put his arms around them both.

"Miss Davis, Mr Scott. We've got Lauren's test results back. I'm sorry to tell you that Lauren has what is known as an Atrial Septal Defect. This is when there is a hole in the atrial septum. The atrial septum separates the right and left filling chambers of the heart. Normally this sort of defect would have been discovered by now, with these defects one hopes that a small hole will heal itself, the fact that Lauren is only now displaying symptoms suggests that her condition is worsening meaning the hole is unlikely to heal itself. Due to the increased size and also the position of the hole I don't feel that the minimally invasive procedure of cardiac catheterization is the best path to take. Due to the severity of Lauren's case I really feel the best thing for her would be to close the hole in a surgical procedure."

"Open heart surgery."

"Yes Mr Scott it would mean open heart surgery." And all four of their hearts broke at the news.

"So what would happen?" Brooke's voice came out shaky and Nathan tightened his grip on her shoulder.

"Well the surgeon would make an incision in Lauren's chest and a heart and lung machine would keep her body functioning while the repair is made. With a hole the size of Lauren's what is needed is a man-made piece of material to be placed over the hole and once this is done the surgeon will close the incision and the surgery is finished. Lauren would likely make a full recovery, she'd have to be monitored for a year or so but her heart tissue would heal over the patch until around 6 months post-op the hole is completely covered by tissue. After that there's no reason she wouldn't be exactly like any other child."

"But there are risks."

"Miss Davis there are risks with any surgery, but Lauren really does need the surgery. I can't force you to give consent but I strongly advise that you do, for her sake. Not having surgery is far riskier than having it."

"When will…when will she be operated on?"

"Well I'd like to stop giving Lauren the sedatives now so she can wake up and have the situation explained to her as best we can. Then it's likely to be a few days for her to become accustomed to the idea and for a surgical team to become available. I will book her in if you're willing to give consent for the first available theatre and then inform you when she's scheduled for the surgery."

"Is there a form I need to sign?"

"I'll have one of the nurses bring you it. Do you have any other questions?" Brooke shook her head and shuffled to the chair beside Lauren before sliding down into it.

"Doctor how long will it be before she wakes up?"

"It's hard to say exactly Mr Scott but I would say it would probably be morning at least. I'll make the arrangements now." The doctor nodded at them before leaving.

"She left her purple monkey at your house when she stayed over. I think she'll want it when she wakes up."

"No problem honey Nathan or I can get it."

"Actually Lucas could you go and get it? I just would like a little time alone with her if that's okay."

"Brooke honey are you sure don't want Lucas to stay or I can or Nathan. Do you really want to be on your own right now?" Brooke turned her sad eyes towards Haley.

"I just need to be with my baby."

"I'll drive over get her monkey and be right back. Do you want me to call my mom and get her to come by?"

"I'll call her when you get back." Lucas nodded and watched as Nathan and Haley hugged Brooke tightly.

* * *

Lucas was just about to get in his car and return to the hospital with Lauren's stuffed monkey when Haley shouted him. He paused with one foot in the car as she came running down the driveway.

"Luke I want you to have this tape. It's everything, all the big moments in her life, ever since day one. I think you should really see everything." He took the tape in his hand and looked at it for a second.

"Thank you Haley, I'll call you when we know when the surgery is scheduled for."

"Lucas she's not as strong as you think she is. Please just remember that." Lucas got in the car and wondered whether Haley had meant Lauren or Brooke, he hoped she meant Brooke. He could handle her breakdown much better than the thought of Lauren not being okay. He pulled the car over and called the hospital.

"Hi can I get a message to Brooke Davis, she's in room 314 with her daughter Lauren Davis. Could you please tell her that I've got the monkey but that I'll be a little longer than expected but that I'll definitely be back tonight. It's Lauren's father by the way. Thank you." He turned the car round and drove to his mother's. He knew she was going straight to Keith's after closing the café and he wanted to be alone with the tape. He pulled the car into the driveway and for the first time in years let himself into the house. He pushed the tape into the machine and sat back and flicked the TV on. Instantly on the screen there was an image of a very young, exhausted and scared Brooke with Haley stood beside her both staring at the small bundle in Brooke's arms.

"_Brooke she's so beautiful."_ Haley looked so amazed as she looked down. Lucas heard Nathan's voice from off camera.

"_So Lauren Scott Davis this is your first ever day in this world. The messy one holding you is your mom and the girl next to her in the ugly ass poncho is your aunt Haley."_

"_Nathan you can't say that."_

"_Why not Hales it's true?"_

"_The a-word. She's less than an hour old."_

"_Yeah but when she's watching this she'll probably have heard worse." _Lucas smiled as he heard Nathan's laughter and saw the annoyed look on Haley's face.

"_I wish her father was here to meet her. I wish he'd got to be here and watch her come into this world." _Haley placed an arm around Brooke as the girl on the tape cried.

"_I can still call him if you want."_

"_And say what? By the way there's a baby here you should meet. I've waited this long I should at least find a good way of telling him." _

"_Ok Brooke." _After a few more minutes of crying Brooke looked directly at the camera, or so Lucas thought until she spoke.

"_Nathan turn it off and start over I don't want her first day to be all sad and crying. I want her to see how happy we all are she's here."_

"_Sure thing Brooke."_

The screen flicked and seconds later the same scene was displayed, except this time his mom was holding Lauren and Brooke had pulled herself together. Lucas watched his family passing his daughter between them all and felt keenly aware of every moment he had missed. As the images went on to reveal Lauren's first bath, her first crawl, walk, laugh, word, hair cut and so on Lucas let go of the anger of missing it all and was left with a deep sadness. The girl in that video wasn't the spiteful girl Brooke had let him believe she was.


	12. Honesty

**I just want to thank everyone for the reviews, they're amazing and it really does keep me motivated.**

Lucas walked into Lauren's room purple monkey in hand, Brooke glanced up and noticed that he seemed softer somehow.

"Brooke I want to talk to you about Peyton." Brooke didn't know whether she felt angry at his poor timing or not, but she knew whatever he had to say didn't matter to her.

"I don't want to hear it Lucas."

"Brooke you need to hear this. I need you to know this. We've become the people who we always should have been while Lauren's been in this place. We've become her parents who only care about her and forget everything and anything else. I feel like we might even be bordering on friendship or at least making a start in that direction and I don't want you knowing I was at Peyton's that night to ruin it all. It was one night and it hasn't happened since and I don't want it to. This is my life and I can't ever see Peyton being a part of it. It was a mistake Brooke. I felt nothing when it was happening." It didn't matter to Brooke though. It was all just words and she'd learnt a long time ago that what Lucas Scott said about Peyton Sawyer and what he felt were rarely the same thing. But he was right about them starting towards a friendship for Lauren's sake, which prompted her to confess.

"When I told you the reason I never told you about Lauren I let you believe it was revenge for Peyton. Lucas I was scared and if you'd known and come rushing to my rescue with all the promises you would have back then I just wasn't strong enough to say no. I had visions of becoming bitter and hateful like Dan and Deb. And worst of all I knew that eventually no matter how hard you tried or how guilty you felt you'd have ended up with Peyton. And by the time that happened I'd have remembered all the reasons I fell in love with you, because I knew you'd be an amazing dad. It would have broken my heart and probably our child's too. It seemed easier to not tell you until I wasn't scared anymore. But the thing is what I realised I'll always be scared. But I have to live with that fear and do things anyway because otherwise she'll miss out. I think being a parent you're always worried and scared and it never stops."

"Being scared is not a crime Brooke, you could have shared that with me."

"Lucas it was admitting something I can't ever admit, that I am vulnerable. There are people I've known my whole life who don't know me because I never let people see me. It's not your fault, but what happened back then it just confirmed everything I've ever felt about myself, all the bad things. I couldn't then show you of all people how much I needed help, how alone I was." She couldn't tell him anymore than she had. There were things locked inside her that she didn't think she'd share with anyone. The truth was her entire image of herself was coloured by her parents and their treatment of her. Even as she'd grown older and realised logically that nothing she'd done had made them the way they were, that there was nothing she could have done to make them love her there was still the illogical part that felt herself unlovable. And nothing that had happened with her 'best friend' and her ex-boyfriend had helped erase the derogatory self-image.

"Brooke Haley gave me a tape, of Lauren. So I could see her and the things I missed since she's so ill. Nathan never did start again. I saw everything you said right after she was born. For the first time I do believe you planned on telling me. I never thought that before." Brooke swallowed back tears.

"Nathan is such an ass. I can't believe he kept it. That was the happiest day of my life. I regret not giving you the chance to be there. Especially now, if this is all we get." She couldn't hold back anymore and tears flowed from her eyes. Lucas grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet. He wrapped his arms around her.

"I'm glad he's an ass. I promise you Brooke there will be so many more happy days in your life. When she graduates high school and college. When we see her get married. The day she makes us grandparents." Brooke felt his tears moistening her shoulder as they clung to one another. They both needed each other to make the other believe there was a lot more days they would get to spend with their daughter. That it wouldn't end like this. Lucas' grip on Brooke tightened. He wasn't willing to let any of this go. He was tired of the anger he carried inside he wanted his world to be good again, for his family and friends to be everything they used to be. He wanted his world to revolve around Lauren, his mom, Haley, Nathan and Hannah and Brooke. And that thought was the most startling of all, that Brooke was part of the world he wanted.

"I wish I could take it back, all the mistakes…" her voice was soft and he cut her off by placing a finger over her lips. He looked deep into her eyes as he spoke.

"Brooke reliving it all won't change anything now. I was hurt and angry, and I know you were too. But I think it's time that we put it all in perspective. 5 years ago I betrayed you and hurt you so badly, you lied to me and we messed up our daughter's life for 5 years. But we have the rest of our lives to do it all right for her. I missed stuff and I wish I hadn't but I still get everything else, her future. And so do you. The best part is she'll barely even remember all the bad feeling between us. When she gets out of hospital I want us to be as much of a family for her as possible. We need to be friends Brooke and raise her with nothing but love."

"I'm still sorry."

"I forgive you." The shock in her eyes when he spoke told him she wasn't ever expecting forgiveness. He had surprised himself by saying it. He hadn't known it was coming. But having accepted that they'd both done this, both created this situation it was easier to let go of the bad feeling towards her. Deep in his heart his belief that they'd got the future to make everything as it should have always been made forgiveness easier to achieve.

* * *

Lucas had left Brooke with a now awake Lauren to go and call his mom and Haley and tell them she was awake, he also had to tell them her surgery was set for two days time. He wanted the walk to the pay phone to last forever, once he'd called them both he had to go back to that room and he and Brooke had to tell Lauren what was happening. He thought of himself as a writer and had always had a way with words, yet he had no idea what the words were to explain this to his daughter. He called his mom first and told her the news. She promised to come visit Lauren as soon as the lunch time rush was over. He tried Haley but it went to voicemail. He didn't leave a message – it couldn't be said that way. As he made his way towards the elevator he saw her. The blonde woman coming through the hospital entrance.

"Lucas." She'd seen him and come straight to him. "I've tried leaving you messages to get back in touch with me and let me know what's happening but I've not heard a thing." He felt guilty, he knew that Peyton did have some feeling for Lauren, that she was worried. But he still wasn't sure how to speak to her, he knew at some point he'd have to tell her how he felt about that night. But he'd been so overwhelmed with everything he'd yet to figure out how to approach her. She was looking at him expectantly and he knew there was more to it than what she said. The hidden meaning behind her words was clear to him – why haven't you called me?

"She's scheduled for open heart surgery in two days time, she has an atrial septal defect. A hole basically that needs closing. Look Peyton I was just calling my mom but Lauren's awake and I really need to get back." He turned away from her when she grabbed his arm.

"Luke talk to me, I'm your girlfriend I'm here to support you."

"Peyton you're not my girlfriend." The words came out before he'd even had chance to think. He didn't want to hurt her and he was sorry when the words hit home with her. He hadn't wanted to do this now but it appeared he had no choice. "Sorry I didn't mean it to come out like that." He guided her to a seat in the waiting area. "Peyton I do care about you, since I came back it's felt like you're the only person I could talk to. But I have to be honest and say that for me the other night was a mistake. Mistake maybe is a little harsh but I never meant to give you the impression that there was a future for us." She looked devastated and he hated himself.

"This is her isn't it! She knows and she's using Lauren to make you do this." Lucas shook his head sadly. He knew that he was responsible for causing an end to the once strong friendship.

"Brooke does know, but she hasn't done anything. Honestly Peyton this is no one's decision but mine. The truth is watching my family and my friends since I got back and feeling so outside of it all, I was incredibly lonely and I was resentful at the time. That Brooke got everything and she was in the wrong. That's how I ended up at your door, you were the only person I could actually speak to." He wouldn't admit it to her but being around Peyton – the town misfit – had made him feel better, at least he was more connected than her. In his melancholy state he had selfishly used her life to make himself feel better which he deeply regretted. The fact she wanted him when no one else seemed to had led him to her door. "But things are different now. Brooke and I have decided that we both made mistakes that we both need to forgive and forget for Lauren's sake. This has shown us how precious she is to us and that nothing else should matter. I'm sorry Peyton."

"So you're back in the inner circle and you don't need me now." He wanted to deny it, hearing her say it like that made him feel awful. However it was essentially the truth.

"Peyton I've done nothing for you in the time we've known each other. I was responsible for destroying your relationship with Brooke, and now I've used you. Peyton you deserve more than that. I'm sorry." She stood up and he couldn't quite read the expression on her face.

"If that's the way you feel. I got job offer in L.A. I'm going to take it now. I'm only telling you so you'll know where to find me when you realise I'm it." She walked away before he could tell her that for him she'd never be 'it.' He sighed deeply and sunk back into the chair letting his head fall back against the top of the chair. Sometimes he wished he'd never left the Rivercourt. But then if he hadn't Haley and Nathan wouldn't have found one another, nor had their daughter. And he wouldn't have Lauren. However life would have been much simpler. He knew he had to go back. He was dying to see his daughter, to talk to her. He just didn't want to give her the news he knew he had to. With a heartfelt sigh he stood and made his way back to her room. As he went in Brooke raised a questioning eyebrow, she knew it wouldn't have taken that long to make two phone calls. Lauren's face lit up.

"Daddy, momma says that when I leave hospital we can all go out for the day." He smiled at her and sat down next to her. His gaze flicked up to Brooke's before it rested on Lauren again.

"We sure can honey, anywhere you want to go."

"There's lots of places. How soon can we go?"

"Well baby girl daddy and I have got to tell you something. It's about why you're in hospital and how long you're going to be here for."

"I can breathe okay now momma and I don't feel tired no more. Can't I go home now?" Lucas saw the tears in Brooke's eyes as she ducked her head down.

"I know you feel better now but that's because you've been asleep for a really long time. Soon you won't feel so good again. The doctors have found out what's wrong though. There is a hole in your heart which they need to close up."

"But my heart is in here." Her fist thumped against her chest and her beautiful face creased into a frown. Lucas held her other hand and gently ran his thumb over it. He took over where Brooke had left off.

"It is in there. But it still needs fixing, so what the doctors need to do is give you some medicine so that you are asleep again and then they need to open your chest up and fix your heart and then close your chest and wake you up. Then you'll all better."

"Open me up?" Fear fixed on her face. Brooke came up and pulled her into a hug.

"Only for a little while, then you'll be okay again."

"Momma I don't wanna be open."

"I know baby, but you won't feel a thing. You won't even know it's happened. Then you won't ever have problems breathing and you'll be super healthy."

"I still don't wanna momma." Lauren began to cry and Brooke held her tighter. Lucas stood and wrapped his arms round them both.

"I promise you Lauren that I will not let anything bad happen to you, we will watch over you while you're asleep and we will be right here when you wake up."

"I'm scared daddy." Lucas' felt helpless, there was nothing he could do for her, no words would make this better.

"I know princess, but I swear that if you weren't going to be absolutely fine I wouldn't let the doctors do it." It was a small lie, there was a chance that she wouldn't be absolutely fine. But he couldn't face telling her the other option. He had to believe that in 3 days times his daughter would wake up from her surgery and she would have the chance to live the same normal life as any other child. He rested his head on Brooke's as the three stayed in a tight group. A family.


	13. Waiting

Brooke gently smoothed her daughter's hair back desperately trying not to let Lauren see her fear.

"Before you know it you'll be back here, it's just a small sleep and then it's all done. You'll rest here for a while and then you'll be back at home with grandma and me." Brooke knew her voice was raspier than normal but hoped her daughter wouldn't notice. She felt choked by the tears in her throat. But she'd never let Lauren know that.

"Can daddy come too?" Hopeful blue eyes looked up into her own and Brooke smiled down at her.

"Sweetheart there's not enough room for everyone. But I'm sure that daddy will come and visit you everyday. And if you want him to he'll be there the second you wake up until right when you go to sleep, so it'll feel like he's with us." Brooke watched as her daughter debated what she'd said.

"I'd still rather it be real than pretend." Brooke whispered a kiss on her daughter's hair.

"Sometimes pretending just has to be enough." Brooke held back a sigh. She'd spent her entire life pretending, always knowing it was all she had. Though she'd also known it was never enough. She'd always wanted her daughter to have the things she hadn't. And she had had what Brooke hadn't. She'd had a mother who loved her. A proper family home, somewhat ironically she'd had the exact same things her father had had at her age.

"Momma how come baby Hannah gets both her momma and daddy at home? Did I start out that way too?" Brooke was mildly surprised that Lauren had picked now to ask. She'd expected questions such as this a long time ago, more recently when Lucas had first shown up. She squeezed herself onto the bed with her daughter and pulled her close.

"No you didn't start out like that. Your Aunt Haley and Uncle Nathan had a baby because they were married and they loved each other and they wanted to show everyone that love in a baby. But your daddy and I, well we loved each other in a different way and because that love was ending we were given a gift to remember it by and that gift was you."

"So you don't love daddy?" Brooke had no idea how to answer the question. Lucas had been the first guy she'd ever let see her. He was the first one who even wanted to see her. Prior to Lucas she'd been the head cheerleader – every guy's fantasy. Lucas rejected her as the guy fantasy though. It wasn't until he saw her as a person that he even wanted her. In hindsight maybe it was just coincidence that he began to see her as a person when he realised Peyton didn't want him. She questioned whether what they'd shared was love. She'd thought at the time she was in love with him but now she wasn't sure. She wondered if it could possibly have been love when it ended the way it did.

Brooke Davis head cheerleader had morphed into someone different for Lucas Scott. She'd done it willingly. She was unsure whether it had been love, or whether she'd not yet reached that stage. If she hadn't she'd certainly been close. Close to giving him everything. Then again looking at her life she had given him everything. The trouble with looking back at it all is that Brooke could well have loved the Lucas Scott who had become flustered with a naked girl on his backseat. The one who came to a college party to rescue a girl who'd blown him off. But the Lucas Scott who betrayed her with her best friend and lied to her she could never love that Lucas. She'd spent years second guessing when he changed. But she'd never truly know the answer to that. If she didn't know if she'd really loved him then how could she answer Lauren's question about her feelings for him now.

"Without him I wouldn't have you, so there's part of me that loves him for that, for you."

"Momma what's gonna happen to you and daddy if I'm not here anymore?" The pain shot through her heart at the innocent question. That Lauren was aware of the danger that she may not be around destroyed Brooke's theory that she was somehow managing to protect her daughter's childhood.

"You'll always be here." Brooke crushed Lauren's body closer to her own. If there was a god then her daughter would be okay.

"The doctors are ready for you now honey." Lucas had come into the room, but instead of disturbing the close embrace Brooke beckoned him to them. His arms slipped round them both and they clung together again.

"Daddy will you look after momma for me, if I don't wake up." Lucas jerked his body away from the group hug to be able to look at his daughter. His eyes flicked up to Brooke's and she wished that she'd been able to convince Lauren she'd be fine.

"You will wake up. And when you do your mom and I will be right here beside you." They pulled together in another hug as the orderlies and nurse came in to wheel Lauren down to theatre. Brooke slipped off the bed and pressed her lips to Lauren's forehead.

"I love you my little girl." Lucas followed her lead and kissed Lauren's forehead and squeezed her arm.

"I love you too baby." As the two followed Lauren out the room and watched as her gurney got farther away Brooke became aware of the other people watching with them.

"What are you guys doing here? Don't you have work?" Haley stepped forward to embrace her.

"We told Principal Turner about Lauren's surgery and that we both needed to be here." Brooke was touched. She placed a hand on Nate's arm as she returned Haley's hug.

"Karen who's at the café?"

"I closed the café today." Brooke was taken aback. She'd never known a day go by that the café wasn't open. And to her surprise as the elevator doors opened another familiar face appeared. She almost ran into the strong arms that held out to her.

"Keith what are you doing here?"

"I explained what was happening and my boss was really understanding. He's given me leave until Lauren is well on the way to recovery." Brooke pulled away from Keith and looked at the group.

"You guys really didn't need to be here. It's just waiting."

"Then we'll wait with you and Lucas Brooke, there is no where on this earth any of us would be today other than here for you both." Haley smiled supportively at her friend as her husband stepped in beside her. Nathan put an arm around Brooke's shoulder and his spare hand rested on Lucas' shoulder.

"We're all family, this is what we do." Brooke felt like her heart would burst from the love from the people around her.

"I'm going for some air." Lucas' voice was almost harsh when he spoke and with hardly a glance at any of them he disappeared. The group looked at one another in confusion before Karen went to follow. Haley grabbed her arm and stopped her.

"I'll go Karen, it's about time we talked." Haley sighed and left the others to find seats and wait.

* * *

"I'm sure there's a good reason that you just flaked up there." Haley's voice was pretty neutral and he didn't feel like she was accusing him. If anything she bordered on supportive and concerned and that made him feel worse. She sat on the bench beside him and looked at him.

"After Lauren's birthday party I decided the best thing for me to do was to get wasted. I came to this conclusion because on what should have been a happy day for me – which it was – I was incredibly miserable. At that party I felt so alone. I was in Tree Hill but I most certainly wasn't home. All I wanted right then was to be home. I wanted to feel part of things, mostly I wanted to have you back. While I've been gone we stayed in touch and Nathan and I managed to make a rough friendship. Since I came back that's all gone. I just wanted it back so badly. I thought to myself I'd give anything for that. Haley what's killing me is that I have that feeling now. What you guys said up there, I'm home. But to have that means there's a little girl up there having open heart surgery. She might die, and I wished that on her." Lucas' hands ran through his short hair before covering his face as his head fell down and he began to cry.

"You're a jackass Lucas Scott." His head jerked up to look at Haley. She smiled softly at him. "We'd have all got there eventually. Lauren being sick made it quicker. Lauren being sick is tragic and it is awful. And it was tragic and awful that my baby's life was so fretted about because she was premature. These awful, tragic things happen Luke. We can't control them. You wanting things to be good between us didn't make Lauren sick." She was right, deep down he knew that. But it broke his heart that he'd been given the feeling of belonging that he longed for at such a cost.

"I'm sorry I never visited you when Hannah was born."

"So am I. Thank you for everything you did with Brooke for the nursery. It's amazing."

"I was really mad Haley, you of all people didn't tell me. You were – are – my best friend. The last I knew you didn't even like Brooke. It felt like even though we'd stayed close while I was away there was a big chunk of your life you just left out. I think that hurt more, it felt like I didn't know you anymore." Haley looked down.

"Luke if I'd changed then I would have told you. Nathan said to me that I'd seen something in him and gambled on it. That because I'd had faith in him he was able to be the person he could be. He said the reason he and Brooke had always been friends was because they were so alike. He told me that Brooke needed someone to believe in her. She needed someone to see something good in her. So I tried seeing the good things, and it wasn't hard to do. Even before it was obvious she pregnant the thing that struck me first and foremost was how much she loved your mom and how fast she did it. She's a good person and I listened to her. I did what I believed was the right thing regardless of consequence. That is the person you always knew." The pair locked eyes.

"I want us to be like we were." Haley shook her head slowly.

"I don't Luke – I want us to be better." As they hugged Lucas felt his heart get lighter. Haley James had been his best friend for as long as he could remember and he never wanted that to change. Lucas pulled away from her.

"I guess we need to go wait now." They both stood and walked back inside the hospital hand in hand. If any of the others waiting thought it odd that they walked in like they did none commented – but all noticed.

* * *

Haley stretched and yawned. It felt like they'd been waiting days but as she glanced up at the clock on the wall she saw it had been just 3 hours.

"Hey you want to go on a vending machine run with me?" Nathan's eyes opened from their half closed, dreamy state and he stood up.

"Sure." The pair didn't bother to ask for any preferences for food or drink. They knew from experience that when waiting for news it was the last thing on anyone's mind. Haley could barely grasp that just a couple of months ago Brooke had been there making them eat and taking care of them when it was their daughter. It seemed unfair that there were two life and death tragedies happening to their family in such a short space of time. She leaned back against the wall as her husband fed money into the machine.

"How much longer do you think it'll be?" Nathan looked at her then.

"I don't know Hales. I don't know if it's a good thing it's taking so long. No news is good news right?" Haley shrugged in response. Sometimes you just needed news. "So what crawled up Luke's ass earlier?" Haley frowned at her husband.

"His daughter had just been taken to surgery." Nathan looked shocked at her defence of Lucas. It saddened her that her husband would be surprised. It was a true reflection of the state their friendship was – or had been. She felt like they were finally on track. Sadly it had taken this to make it happen. She fully understood his guilt. "Luke's had a rough few months with everything that's happened. Since Keith went back to Charlotte he's been through it all alone – well except for super bitch Peyton and god knows what damage she did. The way we told Brooke why we were here – we included him and he's happy that he's included. He's just heartbroken that Lauren being ill is what made it happen." Nathan began to hand snacks to his wife and looked up at her from his grounded position.

"Haley he hurt so many people when he left. He can't expect to just fit in like it never happened."

"He knows that." Nathan sighed.

"I never said he didn't. I just meant it was always going to take time to feel connected. Whether there were all the other issues or not. Have you told him just how much you missed him? Haley it's not just Lauren you didn't tell him about for all this time. I think you're both as bad as each other. I don't either of you have been honest. You were undoubtedly the world to one another for years before it all got different in junior year. I mean I remember you crying because you weren't graduating together. Maybe if you want you friendship back you need to tell him how much you missed sharing the big things."

"I missed sharing the small things too." Nathan stood and held his wife in his arms.

"I know you did Haley James-Scott."

* * *

Lucas felt someone's presence and pulled his gaze away from where Brooke sat clutching his mother's hand. The two women were wordless in their own worlds. He smiled at Keith as he sat.

"Hey buddy, you and Haley seemed pretty close when you came back up." Lucas couldn't stop the smile emerge on his face. Some days, like today, he thought Keith knew him better than he knew himself. There was something in the tone of his voice that suggested he knew everything.

"I missed her more living in Tree Hill than I ever did when I was in Charlotte."

"Sometimes it's harder to be so close to what you want but can't have than it is to be out of sight and out of mind. Luke there was a greater distance between the two of you these past few months than there ever was when you were in Charlotte."

"I had to let it go, all of it. If Lauren wakes up and she's okay then it's fresh start for us all. They're her family and I'm a guy who showed up who plays dad a few times a week. I want to be part of that family. To do that it means letting go of the past. Besides it's the right thing for Lauren." Keith let out a soft chuckle.

"I'm pretty sure I said that to you a few months back."

"Miss Davis, Mr Scott." All six of them leapt to their feet at the voice. Brooke and Lucas clasped their hands together tightly as united as one being they took a step towards the anxious looking doctor.


	14. Through The Tunnel

As Brooke systematically worked her way around the hateful hospital room that had become her home she carefully took each and every card and pressed them into the box file she'd bought. This wasn't a time she'd ever want to remember – nor was it something she'd ever forget. However the cards she did want. She wanted to look at them and know how much she and her daughter were loved by their make-shift family. She held one in her hand and smiled at the crazy colours and design. She'd been touched and knew Lauren had been to see the cards from her classmates upon waking. But now Brooke was taking them all down. The flowers at the bedside were almost dead and Brooke took them from the vase and threw them away. She trudged to the bathroom and tipped the water away before rinsing the vase out and placing it back beside the bed. It reminded her that in some ways this hospital room was like a factory production line. As soon as one left there would be another person in that bed. In the case of this ward another child. Another family facing such agony. Would that family receive the same news she had? Her tasks done she glanced around the room checking it was as bare now as when she'd first arrived.

She picked the bag up from her feet and slung it over her shoulder. Again she glanced round the room, it was cold and sterile once more. Just waiting. She shuddered and realised she'd left the window open. She turned and closed it. She picked the box file up from where it rested on the chair and hugged it to her chest.

"Hey." She turned to the door where Lucas had greeted her from. "You ready to go?" She nodded and surveyed the room for the last time before following Lucas out the door. She said nothing to him as they rode the elevator to the ground floor. It seemed pointless in trying to find words to say. He was feeling the exact things right now she was that she was certain of. As the doors opened she saw Karen and Keith.

"Momma I got my paper here, see. Grandma says I have to keep tight hold because this is the paper that says I can go home." Brooke grinned at her daughter. Lauren was sat in a wheelchair beside Karen with a big smile on her face. She had a piece of paper clutched tightly in her hands and was holding it up so Brooke could see.

"Well best not let go or you'll be stuck here for even longer." By this time Brooke and Lucas had reached Lauren and Brooke's hand messed with her daughter's hair.

"Oh no I don't think I ever want to see the inside of this place again so don't you dare let go sweetie." Lucas joked but deep down it was the truth. A truth they all felt. Brooke had known that when the doctor told them surgery had gone well that it was by no means the end of the road. They'd had to endure another two months of Lauren being in hospital. It hadn't been long until they'd seen improvements though. She and Lucas had been there everyday with her, alternating nights with her.

When Lucas returned to Tree Hill 6 months ago she'd never imagined there'd be a point in time where she would spend almost every hour of every day with him. But truthfully she'd been incredibly grateful for his constant presence. Though they'd not talked in any depth about anything other than their plans for Lauren's future she felt a peace with having him in her life. She almost dared to hope that they could now be called friends. It wasn't hard to see what had made him the first boy she'd 'given a rat's ass about'

* * *

Brooke opened the door to her home to hear the sound of laughter. She followed the sound into her bedroom.

"Lauren Scott-Davis what on earth are you doing?" Lauren froze and the remaining occupants of the room turned to see her.

"I'm playing with Hannah momma." Brooke frowned.

"I can see exactly what you were doing. I mean what are you doing chasing her round the room when you should be resting? And Lucas Eugene Scott why on earth are you just watching her?" She kinked an eyebrow at Haley who had scooped Hannah into her arms. Lauren sat meekly on the bed.

"Brooke she's been resting for 2 months in the hospital and over a week at home. The doctor said to introduce activity back into her life. Chasing Hannah for 15 minutes won't hurt her." She didn't miss the emphasis on the word 'won't.' Nor did she miss the puppy dog eyes her daughter was throwing her.

"I'm going to make dinner." She turned and flounced from the room. Once in the kitchen she gripped the work surface tightly trying to contain her emotions. She sighed and opened the fridge to retrieve the vegetables for dinner.

"Brooke." Her breath caught in her throat as she turned to see Lucas in the doorway. "What was that?" She turned back to the job at hand. Her hand shook as she began to chop. Her back was to him and she refused to look at him.

"Caring about her health." She heard rather than saw him draw closer to her.

"Brooke that was bordering on insanity." She slammed the knife down and spun to face him unaware just how close he was to her. His proximity shook her and she couldn't understand why.

"No Luke it wasn't. It was protecting her. It's keeping her safe."

"Brooke the doctor checked her and she is fine. We need to introduce things back to her life, we can't keep her chained to the bed."

"Yeah well the doctor checked her when she was born, and when she was 6 months old, and a year and 18 months. Forgive me if I'm sceptical about the doctor's check." Lucas reached a hand out to her. She shook it off and took a step back.

"Brooke you only have to look at her to see how healthy she is now. There's no way I'd take her out to the playground but Hannah can just about crawl, Lauren barely has to do more than shuffle to catch her. You can't wrap her in cotton wool forever because there WAS a problem."

"She's all I have Lucas is it so wrong of me to need to keep her safe. I just don't want to rush things and it go wrong. I don't…I can't have anything happen to her." She felt the tears in her eyes and brushed them fiercely away. This time when Lucas reached for her he successfully pulled her into his arms.

"I know you're scared, I am too Brooke. We've, she's been given this incredible chance for a healthy, long, happy life. I'm not suggesting she run a marathon but we need to let her start living her life again."

"I know Luke, it's hard though."

"It's hard for me too. I just want to hold her close and never let go to make sure nothing ever touches her. But what would that do to her? The point of the surgery was so she could be like every other child out there and live a normal life. Why put her through that if we don't let her use this opportunity?" Brooke let her neck muscles relax and her head came to rest on Lucas' shoulder.

"I hope you remember that speech well – I've a feeling you'll need to use it often over the next few weeks." Lucas laughed and she managed a smile. She didn't find it odd that neither moved away immediately.

* * *

Brooke smiled softly to herself as she cleaned the dishes. She could hear Lucas' steady voice read the story he'd written for Lauren to her as he tucked her in for the night. With Karen at work the three of them had eaten together and Brooke had cleared away while Lucas had bathed Lauren. Brooke had gotten her in her nightgown and made sure she brushed her teeth before hugging her and kissing her goodnight leaving Lucas to read her a story and tuck her in. She felt a glow about her and she realised why. This is what life should be like. She used to dream of the TV happy family scenario when she was a child and wish that her family was like that. When she'd been pregnant with Lauren it hadn't been an option. But now she began to hope. Hope that one day she'd find someone who she could share this life with. Brooke Davis head cheerleader and party girl had matured into a woman who placed her family above all else in life. Nothing was more important to her and she hoped that one day her wish of having the all American family would come true. She jumped as she turned and found Lucas sat at the table.

"You seemed so deep in thought I figured it was rude to disturb you." Brooke smiled and sat down opposite him.

"Lauren asleep?" Lucas nodded. "Luke I can't believe how good she's doing. The fact I've been working the past two weeks must mean I don't think anything will happen to her and I am truly grateful you've been here to take care of her. I think it will take forever to pay the bills off so it's good I'm back at work but I have to ask, what are doing?"

"Sat in the kitchen chatting to you." His voice was slightly sarcastic and he looked a bit confused. Brooke shook her head.

"I mean in hospital a gazillion years ago you said about an internship, I know that you don't want to leave Tree Hill now but what are you going to do?" Lucas blew some air out of his mouth.

"Honestly I've no idea. Once I realised basketball wasn't a career option I wanted to be a writer. Now I don't know."

"Do you have to be in New York to write?" Lucas pulled a face.

"Not to write but it would have been easier to get someone to read my novel if I was there." She was surprised.

"You already have a novel?" He grinned.

"I do, for a year or so actually. I suppose I could still attempt to find a publisher the old fashioned way. Mail them the novel and hope someone reads it. But publishers get hundreds of books it's unlikely it's a viable career choice for me."

"You don't get anything in life if you don't try. I guess you being a jobless loser is good for now, with regards to Lauren." The look on his face at being called a jobless loser was priceless and she laughed. She threw the towel that she was holding at him to break his stunned silence. The mischievous look that covered his face upon realising she was joking was not missed by her. She began to back slowly away from him as he advanced on her.

"You're so paying for that Davis." She squealed as he grabbed her and hoisted her towards the sink.

"Lucas don't you dare." It was too late, he pushed her head into the water. As he let her up shaking water from her outraged face he laughed. "Lucas Scott, you are a dead man!" He continued to laugh as she chased him with the pancake batter she'd prepared for the morning.

"Brooke my mom will go insane if you get pancake batter on her furniture."

"Well you best get outside for this then." She dived towards him but he managed to grab her arm turning it so the bowl was over her own head. Her eyes widened as she realised what he meant to do.

"I swear to god Luke if you dare to try and do this…" She felt the batter land on her head and her foot lashed out. He yelped and let go of her arm leaving her free to pour the majority of the mixture over him. He looked up from his position on the ground in shock. He leapt up and ran after her. She kept the couch between them and laughed as the batter began to drip down his face. He dived over the couch and began to tickle her mercilessly.

"Not so funny now huh Brooke." She yelled and squirmed underneath him.

"What on earth is going on? I'm surprised Lauren isn't awake with this noise." Both stopped what they were doing and turned to Karen at the door. She wordlessly took in the scene in front of her. Brooke laid on the floor with Lucas straddling her waist. Batter covered them. The two exchanged guilty looks before standing. They looked to Karen for her explosive response but she laughed.

"Mom aren't you mad?" Karen shook her head and came further into the room closing the door.

"For the last few months the two of you have gone through so much with Lauren, before that you were at each other's throats following years of anguish on both parts. You in particular Brooke grew up far too quickly. Honestly the mess is not great but I'm just happy to see you both happy and laughing." Brooke looked at Karen surprised, not so much the lack of anger but her words. Brooke was surprised that when she thought about it Karen was right. Tonight for the first time in an incredibly long time she'd felt happy.


	15. Finally Happy

**My apologies for this update being so long in coming. Season six is just showing here in the U.K and since the episode where Lucas refers to Peyton as 'pretty girl' it's been almost impossible for me to write anything for this.**

**I still adore Brooke but unfortunately I've reached a point in this where I need to write Lucas which is why it's taking so long.**

"BROOKE!" Lucas flung the door to his childhood home open as he shouted her name. He received no answer and began to march further into the house. "BROOKE!" He tried his old room to no avail. "BROO"

"What the hell Luke?!" She cut him off as she yanked the bathroom door open. He didn't even notice anything about her. Lucas pulled her to him. She hugged him back briefly before pulling away from him utterly confused.

"I wanted you to be the first one to know Brooke. I never would have this without you. I never thought it would happen so why try but then remember a few months ago you told me that if I didn't try there was really no chance." Brooke sighed heavily.

"Luke stop babbling."

"Lindsay something or other called me just now. She wants to publish my novel." Lucas was almost buzzing with excitement. Brooke's face broke into a wide grin as she moved to embrace him.

"I am so happy for you Luke, congratulations." He pulled away from her and smiled.

"Thank you for telling me to do. I can't believe it. I want to celebrate. Let's go out tonight." Brooke hesitated for a second. "Dinner and then Tric, I'll ask Nathan and Haley too."

"Sure Luke. You deserve a celebration." His face was beginning to hurt he was smiling that much.

"Brooke this year has been such a rollercoaster. I mean it's madness. But with Lauren doing so well and now my novel it seems like I'm getting there. We're getting there." He hugged her tightly again for a second before realising her. She shifted awkwardly suddenly feeling uncomfortable being with him stood so close in an empty house, her with nothing but a towel covering her.

"Luke let me just get dressed and we can talk some more." He pulled a face and for the first time since barging into the house looked at her.

"Geez Brooke I interrupted you sorry. Don't get dressed on my account." Her eyes widened in shock and he stuttered as he realised what he'd said. "I mean…um…don't rush to get dressed…I'll go and see Nate and Hales about tonight. You continue doing your thing. Bye." With that he turned and stumbled towards the door. Slamming it shut behind him he let out a breath of air and slumped back against the now closed door. Seeing Brooke with so little on was having an unexpected effect on him.

* * *

Lucas' hand moved to rest on Brooke's back as she stepped into the crowded club ahead of him. Dinner had been a joyful affair for the four. It felt as though their lives were beginning to go right. For Lucas his world was finally making sense to him.

"If I knew fat was in a style in Tree Hill I wouldn't have come slut." Lucas was stunned to hear the words. He felt Brooke freeze and felt a desire to rip the speaker's throat out. He watched as Brooke slowly turned. He was shocked to see a grin on her face.

"Well now ho, you done screwing all of Omaha decided to see if there was any fresh meat here." Lucas could barely believe what Brooke had said to what he now saw as a red-headed woman. The two then laughed and hugged one another tightly. He felt thoroughly confused by the display.

"They've always been like that." Lucas turned to his brother. "That's Rachel, she moved here after you'd left. They hated each other for a while but then something happened though neither will tell anyone what and they're just like that. Still the same insults as before they liked each other but best friends underneath it."

"Rachel this is Lauren's dad, Lucas." Lucas felt uncomfortable with the level of scrutiny he was receiving.

"Well I guess I should slap you and then hug you." He raised an eyebrow at her and she laughed. She held her hand to him and he shook it. "I'm Rachel, Rachel Gatina-McFadden."

"McFadden?" She laughed again.

"Yes I believe you know my husband." Even though he'd been back in Tree Hill almost 8 months there were still many surprises. There was no denying the woman in front of him was truly stunning, and as cruel a thought as it was he did briefly wonder how Mouth had married someone as beautiful as she was.

"What on earth are you doing here? Is Mouth here too?" Rachel nodded at Brooke's question. "Why didn't you call?"

"Well he's got a meeting in the morning and we wanted to see how it went before we saw you. He's meeting with a more local station about moving home and becoming an anchor here. We just thought we'd see how likely it was before we mentioned it. I didn't really think we'd run into you here." Lucas watched the exchange between the two girls mildly amused but mainly curious. He wondered how Brooke had ended up so close with this girl. He was also curious as to why he'd not heard anything about her or from her while Lauren had been in hospital.

"Lucas Scott?" Luke turned hearing his name being shouted above the music. He smiled and shook hands with his old friend.

"I just met your wife." There was an undeniable gleam about Mouth as he basked in the wordless approval of the woman he married. It had never escaped his notice that many thought that Mouth had married well out of his league

"Don't let her fool you, her claws might seem sharp but she's harmless – mostly." Lucas laughed. Tonight was definitely shaping up differently to how he'd expected. But as he looked at the happiness radiating from old friends and new he'd never felt more at home here.

* * *

Lucas stepped into the café and saw he was the last to arrive. His mother had demanded everyone show up for dinner at the café, she'd even closed it for just them. Deb was bouncing Hannah on her knee while Nathan coloured with Lauren. Both Brooke and Haley were moving tables around to accommodate the large gathering. He smiled and went over to help the girls.

"So has mom said anything to you about why she's organised this dinner?"

"I guess I just figured it was her celebration for you." Lucas shrugged at the response.

"She never said." The three exchanged a confused look. Tables ready Brooke went to help Karen bring out the food. Lucas turned as he heard the door open ready to tell the customer they had closed early today to find his uncle. He went over and hugged the older man. "I thought you'd headed back home already." The two pulled apart.

"It's all relevant Luke. Something smells good." Keith stepped further into the homely atmosphere of the café leaving Lucas pondering his words. Within minutes the occupants were all seated digging into the piles of food. Conversation was slow as they tucked into the delicious food. When they were sated Karen stood.

"Well thank you for all showing up considering I only asked you all this morning. I wanted you all here because there's something important I want to share with you all." Keith stood up next to her and took her hand.

"We wanted to share." Karen bestowed a loving smile on him before turned back to the others.

"Last night when Keith was getting ready to leave again I realised I didn't want to keep saying goodbye. So I asked him to move in with me." Before the happy congratulations could commence Keith cut them off.

"I told her I couldn't possibly move in with her…" The group were stunned. It was common knowledge Keith's feelings for Karen had been there for years. Though it was relatively new that Karen felt the same it seemed odd that he should be the one to refuse her. "Unless she married me first."

"So I said let's get married." As Deb hugged Karen and Nathan shook Keith's hands with Brooke and Haley fussing Lucas sat back and watched.

"This is okay with you isn't it Luke?" Luke smiled at Keith slowly. He shook his head.

"No it's not okay Keith, it's great. I'm so happy for you. I don't know about you, but it's a dream come true for me."

**Sorry for the shortness of the chapter but as I said it's been really difficult getting this part out.**

**In the show I love Millie/Mouth but I adore the Rachel/Brooke friendship so it was a choice that had to be made.**


	16. Book Tour

**Apologises for any grammar mistakes in this but I'm posting it straight away as it's been a while since I updated and if I don't do it now it won't happen until the weekend.**

It had taken a lot for her to agree to this, but Lucas' heartfelt please had worn away at her. She had been able to tell that he'd been completely honest with her when he'd told her that without them both coming on his book tour with him there would be no tour. Brooke knew that if there was no tour there'd be no book. She couldn't fault his reasons, she knew she'd never be able to leave Lauren for two whole months either, especially after everything. She also knew what it was like to live a life with no dreams left. So she'd given in and allowed Lauren to accompany Lucas on his tour. She briefly wondered how he'd convinced the publishers to provide accommodation for not only him and his daughter but for his child's mother too. True it had been the only option and Lucas had never ever suggested Brooke not being with them. He'd repeated what an amazing experience it would be for Lauren. That she'd be able to see and enjoy so many different places. Brooke knew that he'd only said that in order to try and convince her that it was a great thing for Lauren. She had grown to know him well enough over the past nine months to realise that for all he said the real and only reason Lucas Scott had wanted Lauren to come with him on his book tour was the simple fact that he couldn't bear to leave her behind. She admired him for that. She admired him for many things and had begun to see him as the man he was, she no longer felt tied to the past, their past and the subsequent pain.

Brooke turned the handle and gave the door a small push. She stopped in awe as she looked around the lavish room. The publishers had agreed to a suite for the small, unconventional family. The plan being that Brooke and Lauren would share the bedroom while Lucas slept on the pull out couch. She hadn't been expecting this. And in the middle of such splendour sat one of the most stunning, poised and composed women Brooke had ever laid eyes on. As the woman rose and walked to give Lucas a hug and a warm welcoming smile to both her and Lauren Brooke suddenly felt inadequate. And something else she dare not put a name to.

"Lindsey this is Lauren my daughter." Lindsey knelt to Lauren's level and greeted her.

"Hey Lauren I'm really glad to finally meet you, your dad talks about you non-stop." Lucas then gestured his hand towards Brooke.

"And this is Brooke. Brooke this is Lindsey Strauss my editor." Again Lindsey stepped forward with the heart warming smile.

"You're exactly how I pictured you Brooke." While the words were warm and Brooke wanted them to be heartfelt and kind some voice inside her told her that Lindsey was looking down on her, that she was exactly as she'd been pictured. Not at all like Lindsey herself. It dawned on her then that the only way Lindsey could picture her at all was from Lucas' words. Therefore it must be the way he saw her also.

"I want to take Lauren down for her swim." Lindsey brightened and turned to her bag.

"Oh I have the passes here for the pool. Lucas told me how important it was Lauren got her daily exercise and that swimming was a great non-intensive workout so I arranged some passes for the pool in the hotel just across the street rather than letting you trek across town to the public pool." Brooke saw the wide grin spread across Lucas' face and knew this was not a request he'd made. He was genuinely delighted at the gesture. While Brooke felt animosity towards the perfectly turned out woman even she couldn't deny how generous and thoughtful she'd been.

"Lindsey that is amazing." Lucas hugged her. "Thank you so much, we really appreciate it." As the pair pulled apart Lindsey smiled at Brooke.

"I hope you don't feel I overstepped my boundaries or anything. I just know how important it is for Lauren's health and…" Brooke held up a hand to stop her.

"It was incredibly thoughtful." Brooke could see the relief on her face and felt a pang of guilt for her feelings towards her.

"I arranged the same sort of thing for every stop of the tour." Brooke forced a smile at her.

"Thank you Lindsey, it's very kind of you to worry about Lauren." Lindsey smiled.

"To be honest I feel very concerned about her, Lucas talks about you both all the time, so much so that it feels like you're as much a part of my life as his. I didn't want you to feel like giving up so much of your time to accompany Lucas was causing any problems, especially with what you've all been through." Brooke hated her more in that minute. She just didn't know why. She didn't seem false in any way, which Brooke thought would in fact make the woman more tolerable. She seemed a genuinely nice, caring woman. That was the problem.

* * *

Brooke pushed open the door to the suite of the hotel. It wasn't as plush as the suite they'd had in New York, but then none of them had been. Then again what did she expect, she herself knew that everything was bigger and better in New York. Lucas was sat flicking through the channels.

"Where's Lauren?" The suite seemed quiet and it worried her. Lucas switched the television off and looked up at her.

"Lindsey took her for her swim. They seem to be getting on really well." Brooke felt incensed.

"You let that woman take my daughter swimming?" Lucas stood and mirrored her own confrontational pose.

"I let Lindsey my editor and my friend take our daughter swimming since they both seemed really excited by the idea. I suggested it so we could talk Brooke." His voice was rising to a yell now and she was surprised. "What the hell is with you Brooke? I have absolutely no idea what your problem with Lindsey is but it's clear you've got one. She'd been nothing but nice and helpful and friendly to you so why you're like you are with her I just don't know. For a month now we've been travelling round and Lauren and I have looked the sightseeing and spending time together whereas you disappear for large chunks of the day and when you are with us you're quiet and moody and sullen." He sighed deeply and ran a shaky hand through his hair. He sank back onto the couch and looked up at her concern etched over his features. When he did speak again his voice was soft and free of the anger of minutes earlier. "Brooke I'm worried about you." Her own anger left her and she calmly removed her coat and hung it on the back of the door before going and sitting opposite him.

"My problem with Lindsey is quite simply that I'm jealous of her." She smiled slightly at the shocked and quizzical look on his face. "And what's wrong with me is that I'm scared."

"Scared of what?"

"I spent the last 5 years worrying that if you'd been around we'd have ended up like Nathan's parents, the idea of turning out like my own never ever crossed my mind." Lucas shook his head.

"Brooke you're nothing like you're parents, you've always been there." She licked her lips slowly.

"I don't mean that I'm not around. Lucas the reason my mom was so dismissive of me was because she was bitter. She fell in love and got married. She had dreams of being successful Luke, dreams that were never going to fit in with my father's dream of a son and heir. If she gave my father a son then one day she'd get her chance. But when the big day arrived there was a girl. Neither of them wanted me, they wanted a son. The tragic part is that she couldn't have anymore children after me. My father was stuck with a girl, not the child he wanted. I wasn't his dream. My mother and I had destroyed his dream. So he destroyed hers. She never got the successful business life she wanted. And she hated me for it, as far as she was concerned it was all my fault that her dream died."

"Brooke you're not your mother. True things changed when Lauren was born, but I saw you with her when was sick, I see what an amazing mother you are and how much you love her. I didn't even know you felt like this."

"I didn't either. Until I met Lindsey and walked around New York. I walked into that room and saw this elegant, beautiful woman. And I was instantly jealous because a part of me said that should have been me. That's what I hear every time I see her. The fact that she is as lovely a person as she is just makes me hate her more because she's everything I wanted to be. Well almost, publishing wouldn't have been my career. After meeting her I spend couple of days wandering around Manhattan, looking in the designer stores and thinking about what my life could have been if I'd never had Lauren. And I'll admit Luke I'm starting to feel bitter. Fact is it may only be a café but it's a business and it's cooking which is your mom's dream and even after you grew up and left home she still had that. Lucas I'm a waitress. That's all I am. When Lauren grows up and leaves home I'll still be a waitress. I have trawled the ads for a place to live because I know that us living with your mom is ending soon, she's marrying Keith and we need to move out."

"They said that?"

"Of course not, they wouldn't ever I know that. But I can't stay there forever. Aside from everything else Lauren needs her own room, I need my own room. But it's just possible. I can't afford the rent on anywhere I would want her living. I guess the way I'm feeling is a lot of things that all show me exactly how bleak my life is outside of my daughter. I feel like I'm failing her. And I am bitter about how my life has turned out. I had dreams once Lucas." Lucas moved so he was knelt at her feet and took her hands in his. He looked into her face.

"Brooke Davis you are an amazing mother and Lauren is so lucky to have you. I see how much you love her and I am so proud of you. I know there is no one I would want to be the mother of my child more than you. You may not have achieved the dreams you once had but I look at what you have achieved and I'm stunned by it. It is more worthwhile than anything any fashion designer has done – you have raised a wonderful little girl on your own. Yes your dreams have fallen by the wayside but I promise you Brooke we will find a way of creating something you can enjoy, whether it be fashion or a new dream. We'll find something for you. I don't ever want you to think your life is a waste. Brooke Davis you gave me the world. You don't realise who you Brooke. You're fiercely independent. And you are brilliant, and beautiful, and brave. And I'll tell you this right now Brooke Davis is going to change the world someday. And I'm not sure you even know it." He pushed his knees into the ground and rose high enough to place his lips tenderly on her forehead.

"You really think there's something out there for me?" She hated the way she sounded like a child.

"I know there is a place for you Brooke, all we need to do is find it. And it's okay to be sad about the things you lost alone the way, look at Nate. He lost basketball and that was dream and he's sad but he's happy with what he has now. He didn't go down the same path Dan did when Dan got injured, there is no reason why you would be the same as your mother just because you lost your dream. Brooke losing your dream is awful but being like Dan and your mom isn't the result of that, it's the result of not finding a new one and enjoying the things you do have."

"You're right Luke. I just never thought there was time for me to do something for me. But you're here now and I guess that means I can figure my life out a little." He stood up and tugged on her hand until she was stood in front of him. He pulled her into a hug.

"It'll be okay Brooke. You'll find your way." She hugged him back and murmured too soft for him to hear.

"I never thought we'd end up here."

* * *

Brooke smiled at the other woman and nodded her head in approval. There was just a week left before she headed back to Tree Hill, she was a little sad the tour was ending. Lucas' book had been received really well and the past 3 weeks since her talk with Lucas she'd begun to enjoy being together as a family and seeing parts of the country she'd not seen. But she was excited to return home. Only two days after they got back Karen and Keith would be getting married. She almost developed a headache at the thought though. The rush of getting her and Lauren's bridesmaids' dresses fitted and altered along with Luke's tux. She felt bad that she'd not been around to help but knew Haley would be more than happy to step into Brooke's place.

"So where next?" Brooke was pulled out of her thoughts by her companion's voice. Finished with trying on the dress she'd changed and reappeared before Brooke. Brooke followed her to the counter where she stood beside her as she paid then turned her attention back to Brooke.

"How about lunch before we hit anymore shops Lindsey?" Lindsey smiled in agreement and they left the store. In the past few weeks Brooke had worked hard to get over her ill will towards Lindsey. She'd always accepted the truth being that Lindsey was a genuine person who would in all probability be a wonderful friend if Brooke had made the effort, which once she'd accepted her real issues with Lindsey she had tried to do. With great rewards. There was a side of Brooke that hadn't been let out for a while, a side that she didn't share with people purely because she didn't know anyone who'd understand her, not since Rachel had moved away, and before her only Peyton. Haley was still the thrift store girl at heart. As the two browsed the menu Brooke noticed the small smile playing across Lindsey's lips. "What is the smile about?" Lindsey cocked her head to the right and studied Brooke for a second before replying.

"When you apologised for being so frosty towards me at first you said things would be better after having spoken to Lucas. I just…I'm happy for you both." Brooke frowned.

"What does that mean?" Lindsey smiled.

"I assumed that your issue was over Lucas' relationship with me." Brooke laughed.

"Not at all why would you think that?" Lindsey shrugged.

"No reason I guess, obvious assumption." Brooke frowned again.

"I don't believe you. Something made you think that." Lindsey sighed and laid the menu she was holding on the table.

"Brooke when I met you and I said you were exactly how I pictured you I meant it. Lucas talks about all the time." Brooke smiled.

"I'm Lauren's mom what do you expect?" Lindsey shook her head.

"No not in reference to Lauren, he talks about you. As a person. He created an image my head of the person you were and I just thought that maybe there was a spark between you two."

"Don't be ridiculous, the last spark we had created Lauren and she's 5!"

* * *

As the signing was wound up Lucas stretched himself out. Lindsey finished up her conversation with the bookstore manager and went over.

"You have a good time with Brooke today?" Lindsey pulled a face at him. "What did she do now? I thought you guys were really getting along now."

"She didn't do anything I did." Lucas raised his eyebrows at her. "I think I put my foot in it. I think I annoyed her a little."

"Why?"

"Just some stupid comment about there being a spark between you two." Lucas let out a hearty laugh.

"Lindsey I think all this skipping around the country has messed your head up." Lindsey looked sharply at him in annoyance.

"Actually Lucas if we're being honest I think you're the one with the messed up head. You don't see what I see. Do you have any idea how much time you spend talking about her? Or how your face lights up when she walks into the room? Or even the smile in your eyes when you're talking about her? That's not friendship or a common bond over a child. That's more than that." Lucas shook his head.

"Lindsey that's just crazy okay, Brooke and I became friends when Lauren was sick. We put aside our differences for her sake, that's all there is to it." Lindsey shrugged.

"Whatever you say Luke. It's not really my business."


	17. Happy Wedding and Sudden Realisation

"Shouldn't I be the calm collected one doing your tie while you panic rather than you being calm doing mine?" Keith laughed and stepped back to check Lucas' tie was straight.

"What have I got to panic or worry about Luke? I love your mother with all my heart and I have done for more years than I care to remember. And finally after all that time she's in the same place I am. I've never felt more at peace than I do now, minutes away from finally marrying the woman I love. Luke on your wedding day there's no need for pain and hurt and worry when you love someone like I love your mom. The way I see it if you look at someone and know that you will never meet anyone in this world that compares to them then all the other crap just goes away and the only thing left is you making sure you are the best man you can be, because that way there's a chance that person will love you back." Lucas smiled.

"I used to dream of this day when I was a kid. I so wanted you to be my dad, for us to be a proper family." Keith smiled. "As I've grown up Keith I realised that you're my dad whether you're with my mom or not but truth is it is a dream come true for me. Even if it's a little later than I wanted." Lucas grinned. Keith embraced the younger man tightly.

"You were always my son Luke, from the very first second I held you it just felt like you were." Keith pulled away from him. "Now go see your mom."

"After all that you want me to make sure she's coming." Lucas let out a small laugh.

"No Luke I want you to see her first, I want you to have your moment with her because she's yours to give to me. And like you said this day isn't just our dream, it's yours too and I think for your nerves you need a little reassurance." Lucas stepped forward to hug his uncle again before disappearing from the small room. He strode through the room the service would be held in and down the small corridor to the chapel. He lightly tapped on the door.

"Mom it's me, can I come in?" The door was opened by a crack.

"What do you want Luke, we're getting ready." Haley's face was pressed between the door frame and the slightly ajar door. "Tell Keith she'll be ready when she's ready." Lucas shook his head.

"Keith didn't send me Hales I just wanted to see my mom before it all gets going." Haley pulled a face as she considered his words before opening the door. As he stepped in he saw his daughter, she looked so lovely.

"Daddy!" Lauren flew herself into Lucas' arms and he scooped her up.

"Hey princess, you look very pretty." Lauren smiled at him.

"Grandma Karen is almost ready but she's got to wait for momma." Lucas raised an eyebrow in Haley's direction, noticing that Brooke indeed seemed to be missing. Haley inclined her head towards the screen and he could see a figure behind it. His mother's voice could be heard from the bathroom.

"That's because she spent all her time making you look adorable Lauren." The door opened and his mother stepped out. Both he and Haley let out a gasp.

"Grandma Karen you look like Cinderella." Karen beamed at the three. Lucas softly placed his daughter on her feet and went to hug his mother.

"You look amazing ma, Keith's a lucky man." Karen pulled him to her tighter and whispered in his ear.

"No he's not, he's a good man and we're the lucky ones to have him." Lucas couldn't agree more. He pulled away from his mother and just looked at her.

"Your dress is great Karen. You look gorgeous." Karen smiled at Haley.

"Brooke did a good job didn't she?"

"Brooke?" Lucas questioned his mother, unaware Brooke had any input in the dress. Karen nodded at him.

"Brooke designed the dress herself. She chose the material and then because she went with you had to relinquish control to a local dressmaker. She just made the alterations when she got back. That's why it's been such a frantic few days for us both since you got home. What with needing to make sure the dresses she designed for her and Lauren fit and making the necessary alterations and then her making sure my dress was just right." Lucas turned to address the figure behind the screen.

"Brooke you're an amazing designer looking at these. Given what we talked about when we were away I think we need to a find a way to make something of your talent."

"Thanks Luke but let's just get this wedding going first shall we? I'm pretty much done now so you should make sure everyone's ready and get Keith to the altar." Lucas hugged his mother again before disappearing.

* * *

Lucas turned his head to the door as the music started to play, he watched as his daughter walked down the aisle strewing rose petals as she went.

"She's a real angel in that dress Luke." Luke grinned at his uncle's words. Lucas' eyes drifted round the room and rested upon Nathan, the look on his face was unlike any Lucas had ever seen before and as his gaze moved to see what Nathan was staring so intently at he understood. Haley was gliding down the aisle looking the most beautiful he'd ever seen her, a far cry from the awkward, slightly geeky, fashion mistake tutor girl he'd grown up with. Then his breath caught in his throat and his heart slowed as he saw her. She was stunning, absolutely breathtaking. She was a vision in the gown she wore. It was the same as Haley's but on her it looked different. It flattered and hugged the curve of her breast. The gown was simple, it was a strapless dress that hugged her upper body and skimmed her hips dropping to the floor. The dress had a sheen to its colour making it glow in the dim light, it was of a rich, violet colour that seemed to match the amethyst necklaces all three had. The dress had a sash around the waist that was gathered to her left falling to the ground in soft waves. The sash was ok a slightly darker hue than the dress itself, for a second he allowed the thought that Brooke was indeed a very talented designer to have created such masterpieces but the thought was soon gone in the midst of his mind as he followed her ever step down the aisle. As she smiled at Keith he felt a pang in his heart that he couldn't find reason for. He could barely drag his eyes away from her as he realised that his mother was now stood at the altar with them and it was time for the ceremony to begin. His eyes flitted between the happy couple, the minister and her. His gaze never strayed far from her and always returned quicker than he would have liked.

"We are gathered here to witness the joining of this man and this woman in marriage; which is an honourable estate, instituted in the necessities of our being, and dedicated to the happiness of mankind; an estate not by any to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, discreetly, soberly, and in all sincerity. To be true, this outward form must be a symbol of that which is inner and real, a sacred personal union, which a church may solemnize and a state make legal, but which only love can create and mutually fulfil. To endure, the marriage of these two persons must be a consecration of each to the other, and of both to the wider community of which their lives are a part. Love is a great thing, and thorough good. By itself, it makes everything that is heavy, light, and it bears evenly all that is uneven. Love carries a burden which is no burden; it will not be kept back by anything low and mean; it desires to be free from all worldly affectations and not to be entangled by any outward prosperity or by adversity subdued. Love feels no burden, thinks nothing of trouble, attempts what is above its strength, and pleads no excuse of impossibility. Love is therefore able to undertake all things, and it completes many things and warrants them to take effect, where he or she who does not love would faint and lie down. Though weary, love is not tired; though pressed, love is not straightened; though alarmed, love is not confounded; but as a living flame, it forces its way upward and securely passes through all. Love is active and sincere. I believe you have both prepared your own vows." The minister stepped back slightly and Keith turned to Karen and she to him.

"Today I join my life to yours, not merely as your husband, but as your friend, your lover, and your confidant. Let me be the shoulder you lean on, the rock on which you rest, the companion of your life. With you I will walk my path from this day forward." Lucas thought how apt his words were, for as long as Lucas had been on this earth Keith had been his mother's friend and confidant. He had always been her rock. But now, today they were finally becoming more. Lucas smiled knowing that after years of hoping and longing Keith Scott was finally getting all of Karen Roe. "Karen, with free and unconstrained soul, I give you all I am and all I am to become. Take this ring, and with it my promise of faith, patience, and love, for the rest of my life." Lucas handed the ring to Keith as he spoke who then tenderly slipped it on Karen's finger.

"Many years ago you become my best friend but today marks a new chapter Keith, today is the day you become my love for life. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tenderest care, through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future, I promise to be faithful to you. I promise to love you, to commit to you, and support you. I pledge to lend you strength for all of your dreams. You have shown me what love feels like and for that I thank you. You are everything I need and at this moment I know all of my prayers have been answered and that all of my dreams have come true. From this day forward, you shall not walk alone. My heart will be your shelter and my arms will be your home. As I have given you my hand to hold, I give you my life to keep. To marry the person you have set your heart upon is a joy unparalleled in human life. Keith, take this ring as a sign of my faith  
and my commitment to our love, and share this joy with me today." Karen slipped the ring on Keith's finger. The minister stepped back into his place directly in front of the pair as they turned back to him their hands joined.

"Inasmuch as Keith and Karen have consented together in marriage, and have witnessed the same before you, and thereto have pledged their faith to each other, and have declared the same by joining hands and giving and receiving rings, I pronounce that they are husband and wife. You are now wed. May you always remain sweethearts and friends. May your marriage be full of kindness. May the years bring you happiness and contentment. Forever love. You may now kiss the bride." Keith placed a hand softly against her cheek as they leaned towards one another with a soft, gentle kiss. The minister looked up at the guests. "I now give you Mr and Mrs Keith Scott." The couple turned to the applause of their family and friends and smiled. They made their way back down the aisle. Lucas held his arm out in his duty as best man to the maid of honour. She took his arm and they began to follow the happy couple. He glanced back to cheek Lauren was safe with Haley. His skin felt on fire where she was holding his arm and his heart felt like it was about to explode.

"Karen really does look amazing, they both look so happy." He couldn't find any words to say right then, not a single thing came to his mind, so he smiled at her and continued to walk.

* * *

He watched her dancing with Lauren, they both looked so happy and carefree. When Lauren disappeared off he stood and approached her.

"Will you dance with me?" She smiled at him and took the hand he'd offered her. He held her close to him and felt the heart of her body against his.

"Today has been wonderful hasn't it?" Her gaze alighted on Keith and Karen. "They're made for each other." He smiled.

"Yeah well it's taken them long enough." She gently punched his arm.

"Don't be so awful Lucas, maybe they were never ready before. Just because you always wanted them to be together doesn't mean it was right to happen then. You just need faith sometimes – people who are meant to be together always find their way in the end." She smiled up at him before resting her head against his shoulder. The scent of vanilla and coconut filled his nostrils as her hair brushed his face. He closed his eyes and felt her, for a second the two of them dancing so close listening to the music it felt like the world had disappeared.

_Sitting here wasted and wounded at this old piano  
Trying hard to capture the moment this morning I don't know  
'Cause a bottle of vodka is still lodged in my head  
And some blond gave me nightmares, think that she's still in my bed  
As I dream about movies  
They won't make of me when I'm dead_

_With an ironclad fist I wake up and French kiss the morning  
While some marching band keeps it's own beat in my head  
While we're talking  
About all of the things that I long to believe  
About love, the truth, what you mean to me and the truth is  
Baby you're all that I need_

_I wanna lay you down in a bed of roses  
For tonight I'll sleep on a bed of nails  
I wanna be just as close as your Holy Ghost is  
And lay you down on a bed of roses_

_Well I'm so far away the step that I take's on my way home  
A king's ransom in dimes I'd give each night  
To see through this pay phone  
Still I run out of time or it's hard to get through  
Till the bird on the wire flies me back to  
You I'll just close my eyes, whisper baby blind love is true_

_I wanna lay you down in a bed of roses  
For tonight I'll sleep on a bed of nails  
I wanna be just as close as your Holy Ghost is  
And lay you down on a bed of roses_

_Well this hotel bar's hangover whiskey's gone dry  
The barkeeper's wig's crooked  
And she's giving me the eye  
Well I might have said yeah  
But I laughed so hard I think I died  
Ooh yeah_

_Now as you close your eyes  
Know I'll be thinking about you  
While my mistress she calls me to stand in her spotlight again  
Tonight I won't be alone  
But you know that don't mean I'm not lonely  
I've got nothing to prove for it's you that I'd die to defend_

_I wanna lay you down in a bed of roses  
For tonight I'll sleep on a bed of nails  
I wanna be just as close as your Holy Ghost is  
And lay you down_

_I wanna lay you down in a bed of roses  
For tonight I'll sleep on a bed of nails  
I wanna be just as close as your Holy Ghost is  
And lay you down on a bed of roses_

And the words hit him 'baby you're all that I need' just as the words Lindsey had said to him barely a week and a half ago reverberated through his head. 'Do you have any idea how much time you spend talking about her? Or how your face lights up when she walks into the room? Or even the smile in your eyes when you're talking about her?'

Until she'd said it and until this day he'd had no idea. The thought hadn't even entered his consciousness. But as he looked back over today the way she'd entranced him from the second he saw her, the way he felt when she touched him, the way it felt like he belonged here holding her close. He suddenly saw exactly what Lindsey did. As the final chords of the song ended she stepped from his embrace.

"I better go see what trouble our daughter is causing." With that she was gone leaving him staring after her. Haley crossed in front of his eye line and he chased after her.

"Hales." She turned round upon hearing him say her name. "I need your help Hales."

"Luke what's wrong?"

"I need your help with Brooke." Haley's faze creased up in confusion.

"I thought you guys were doing great now." He nodded along with her.

"We are, but listening to their vows earlier and what Keith said before the wedding and Lindsey on the tour and looking at Brooke today I realised something and I need your help with it. I'm in love with her, I love Brooke. Somewhere down this road these months I've fallen in love with her." Haley's face displayed her shock. She shook her head vehemently.

"No Lucas, I won't help you. The only help I'll give is this – forget this madness Lucas. The sooner you wake up and realise that what you're saying is completely insane the better it will be for Brooke and for Lauren." With that she turned on her heel and left him.

**Song is Bon Jovi – Bed of Roses**


	18. Three Little Words

**Thanks for the great reviews, I know some of you think Haley's response was a bit harsh but Lucas totally blindsided her. She wasn't expecting this to happen at all and her first response was to protect Brooke at all cost. It also sets up for some good Naley interaction.**

She stretched her arms out and arched her back as she yawned before pulling back the covers and joining her husband in bed. She snuggled into him happily. The day had been perfect – almost.

"You looked so beautiful today Hales." She smiled into his chest.

"You scrubbed up pretty well yourself. Brooke really has got a lot of talent, she needs to find a way of using it." Nathan placed a kiss on his wife's head.

"I wouldn't worry about that, between Lucas promising her they'd find her path and all and the way everyone's raved about the dresses they'll figure something out." Nathan's use of the word 'they' needled at Haley.

"Perhaps we should help her more Nate."

"I'm sure between the two of them they'll pull something off. It's not like we're short of things to keep us busy."

"But maybe it's not wise for them to spend so much time together." Nathan pulled slightly away from his wife to look at her face.

"What is it?" Haley sighed and sat up properly crossing her legs and turning to face her husband.

"Lucas asked for my help earlier, my help because he was in love with Brooke. I mean can you believe him, after everything that he put her through. Why on earth would I help him? And what possessed him to believe there's any point chasing her I don't know." Nathan chuckled softly.

"Hales he came to you because despite everything he still considers you his best friend. He also knows how important Brooke is to you and you to her. I guess he wants your blessing along with your help." Haley made a dismissive noise. "Hales we're not in high school anymore and can you really tell me this was so much of a surprise for you. Brooke and Lucas always had chemistry. And look at the woman she's become, is there any great surprise that after Lucas had chance to get to know that woman that he'd fall in love with her. Surely you must have seen the way he looks at her, I know that look well Hales, it's the same one I get when I look at you. I know Lucas screwed up, but you know that he's not the guy who did that."

"Maybe, but it doesn't matter how he looks at Brooke or whether it's different now. Brooke wouldn't go back there." Again Nathan chuckled.

"I thought you women were the intuitive ones. Hales this isn't one sided. She looks at him too, I just don't think she realises it yet. Brooke has not been near anyone since Lucas."

"That's because he hurt her so much." Haley interjected.

"Yeah partly, it took a lot for Brooke to open herself up back then. Lucas can't have loved her to do what he did but that's not to say she didn't love him. Look at Keith and Karen, how many times over the years have they almost been happy then screwed it up. But through it all Keith loved her, pined for her. Who's to say that Brooke doesn't feel the same about Lucas."

"But Karen always loved Keith back, even if she didn't know she did." Nathan smiled at his surprisingly dense wife.

"I've seen the way Luke looks at Brooke, even when he first came back and he was so angry with her there was – an appreciation of her. That's grown into more Haley and did so a while ago now. Today though he finally saw it. Maybe if we all gave him a chance to explain things from his point of view we wouldn't judge him so harshly." Haley smiled and kissed her husband.

"Since when did you get so insightful?" Nathan shrugged.

"I guess it's because I've been married to a kind, thoughtful, caring, sensitive, forgiving woman for the last 6 years."

* * *

She put the brake down on the pushchair and sat on the bench beside the man. At first she didn't speak just followed his gaze to the girl on the monkey bars.

"Thank you for meeting me, after what I said yesterday I wouldn't blame you if you didn't want to talk to me right now."

"You want to protect Brooke, I can understand that." She picked up on the worry in his face and again turned her attention to the girl.

"Should she be doing that?" he shrugged.

"I don't think I could stop her even if I wanted to. She's like her mother – fearless. I guess at some point we have to stop protecting her and let her go. She's had months of healing and the point of the surgery was so she could be a 'normal' little girl. It would be unfair to spend the rest of her life telling her not to do something." Haley nodded along with him. He was right, wrapping Lauren in cotton wool would probably do more harm than good eventually. If she felt able to something it was wise to let her at least try. She understood what had happened to her and she was a sensible enough young girl to know to stop if it didn't feel right.

"I talked to Nathan about what you told me. First off I want to apologise for how I reacted, I was shocked. Nathan wasn't though. He said he'd seen this coming for a while now." He actually smiled at her then.

"I was a little shocked too when it hit me yesterday but I guess deep down where I could ignore it I've known for a while too. Not long before the tour ended Lindsey, my editor, basically informed me I loved Brooke. I told her she was crazy but it hit a nerve. Then seeing her yesterday and after what Keith said about love it just felt incredible that I hadn't realised."

"Luke you're still my best friend I want you to know that, but where this whole Brucas thing is concerned after everything that's happened my first loyalty has to be to Brooke." He nodded.

"I wouldn't have it any other way Haley. I'm not asking you to do something you don't feel comfortable with."

"I just need to know Lucas, after what happened in high school and with Peyton again not so long ago, why is it different now? I'm not asking for all the gory details I just need something to convince me that me helping you won't end up hurting her." He nodded again.

"I made a mistake in high school, and I made the same one with Peyton this past year. I won't go in depth with the reasons for either time but it would be fair to say that the simplest form of explanation is that I got it out of my system. Or should I say her. Haley the only thing I can tell you is I'm not a stupid kid and hurting Brooke is the biggest regret of my life, I couldn't ever do that to her again. The difference is I'm not a boy anymore, I'm a man who knows exactly what he wants and is prepared to fight for that." Haley sat there for a while completely unresponsive.

"No grand gestures Luke, be honest with her. You'll need to rake over every second of the past until she understands, because if she can't understand why it happened she'll never believe it won't happen again. Make sure that this is for you and for her though – not for Lauren."

"Do you think there's a chance she'll ever feel the same way?"

"I've no idea Lucas, I think you're asking the wrong Scott here. Where the two of you are concerned it would seem my husband is far more perceptive than I am." Lucas smiled.

"That's all you Hales, the man he is." She shook her head.

"No it's not Luke, Nathan always had that man inside of him. He always had the potential to be the great man he is now. It just took some help, encouragement and faith in him to make him show it."

"The best man we can ever be is the one we become under the love of a good woman." Haley smiled.

* * *

"Hey man." The brunette man came to a halt as he realised he was no longer alone. He pulled the ball in tight to him.

"Hey."

"I didn't realise you still played. I thought it was over." The brunette shrugged.

"Time heals all things. My shoulder will never be right but there's no reason for me to walk away completely. I'll never be good enough and strong enough to go pro but fooling around out here helps me think of new plays for the team. It also helps for me to explain what I want them to do by showing them, plus it helps keep me in shape." Lucas sat on the bench beside the Rivercourt.

"It must have been hard, especially after seeing what the same thing did to Dan." Nathan smiled and sat beside his brother.

"First off I'm not Dan. My injury is real and no amount of rehab would have got me back to peak health. Dan could have rehabbed by all accounts, but apparently he quit because there was too much pressure." Lucas let out a low whistle. "Yeah I know, sucks to find that out after everything he said. Not quite the big man he always made himself out to be. At first I was convinced I'd be back. I came back from a shoulder injury before and I would this time. But the damage was too bad this time, combined with the scar tissue from the last injury I had a choice walk away or wind up with a right arm that was paralysed. I love the game Luke I always have, despite Dan, but there really was no choice at all. Besides in retrospect I don't think it would have been possible to have the life I've got now with my wife and daughter and being a good father if I was away with the game." Lucas nodded, that he certainly understood. "Why'd you not try and go pro?"

"I love the game Nate, but to me that's what it should be. A game, something that enriches your life without taking it over. It should above all things be fun. An experience to enjoy, sure playing pro would be amazing but I think it would take some of the enjoyment away." Nathan stood and walked back onto the court. He held the ball towards his brother. Lucas took the unsaid invitation and joined him on the court. As they played it became clear to Lucas just how badly the injury had impacted Nathan's shoulder. But that didn't mean it was an easy game for Lucas, despite Nathan's injury his fitness level was greater than Lucas'. As the last basket was scored Lucas slumped back onto the bench.

"Close big brother but I guess even injured I'm still better than you in the end." Nathan smirked at Lucas who just smiled back. "So Luke you come here to chat or was there something in particular you wanted to say?"

"I wanted to thank you for talking to Haley." Nathan shrugged.

"I didn't do it for you. I guess I do genuinely believe Brooke still holds a torch for you." Lucas grinned.

"Well I guess that answers the question of whether I have a shot or not."

"Look Lucas what I said to Haley, I did it because I know that sometimes we do stuff that we live to regret, we all make mistakes but those mistakes shouldn't be the things that define us. The Lucas Scott that first stepped onto the court as a Raven was Haley's best friend and not the type of guy that would hurt someone intentionally. Haley saw through all my mistakes to the person I was inside and she gave me a shot. And let's face it my mistakes were too numerous to mention, and I screwed up with her so many times but we're still here, happier than ever with a beautiful daughter. I think it's only fair that you get given the same chance to prove that you are a good guy who made a mistake, not a bad guy who like Dan who just screws people over for fun."

"Thanks Nate, it's nice to know someone believes in me."

"So you figured out what you're going to do?" Lucas slowly nodded.

"I know where I'm going to start which I guess is as much as I need right now. A lot depends on Brooke really." Nathan nodded.

"My one piece of advice is this Lucas: if she walks away just make sure she's doing it because she doesn't want you not because she's scared." Lucas knew only too well how difficult this would be. After everything that had happened he knew regardless of whether Brooke felt the same or not her instinct would certainly be to dismiss the possibility. He stood and began to walk away. "Luke." He stopped and turned back to his brother. "I know you're this big shot author now but if you're interested in a small job to keep you occupied the rest of the time my assistant coach is heading on to bigger and better things in a month or so."

"I'd love to work with you, for the fun." Nathan laughed back at him.

* * *

He turned as he heard the rusty door open. She walked towards him surveying the mini golf course Haley had set up years ago that no one had ever dismantled.

"Lucas why on earth did you want me to meet you on the room of the café?" He smiled at her.

"I wanted to show you something." She laughed.

"A mini golf course? Hate to break it to you but I've seen it before." He shook his head. He held his hand out to her and she took it. He led her to the small loose brick and pulled it out removing the tin hidden behind it.

"Every year as school was starting pretty much since we became friends Haley and I would write our predictions for the school year ahead and then we'd put them in here and wait until the start of the next year to read to one another what we'd written."

"Ok."

"I want you to read mine Brooke, because if you do I can start to explain." Brooke frowned.

"Explain what?"

"Everything." Brooke splayed the pieces of paper out in front of her and she knew instantly which part he wanted her to read, something in her gut just told her. There it was in front of her, he was preparing to tell her he was going after the blonde bitch.

'Peyton Sawyer will become Peyton Scott'

'Make out with Peyton Sawyer, or more.'

'This year I'll talk to Peyton Sawyer.'

She stood back up and took a step back from him. She didn't want to but the words slid from her lips.

"What are you trying to tell me?" She knew she shouldn't be as upset as she was at the idea of him and Peyton. She and Lucas were nothing, they'd not ever been, not on his part anyway. He stepped towards her closing the gap she'd made.

"I'm trying to tell you that I'm in love with Brooke." Her mouth gaped slightly, she was stunned and stumbled backwards. "And I know that for you to even consider me I need to make you see why I screwed up back then and how I ended up with Peyton that night since I came back to Tree Hill." She began to shake her head and back away.

"No Luke." She turned and fled.


	19. One Big Meaning

"I'm sorry I guess I ambushed you a little." She didn't response and he sat beside her, both staring out at the waves crashing. "I should have explained it all better. I just wanted to try and get you to understand."

"why do I need to understand now, why not then?"

"Well back then you wouldn't have listened and because it's taken me a while to see the truth."

"Which is?"

"Brooke the truth is what I wrote every year. I spent years admiring her from afar, wanting her, I thought I loved her. She obviously didn't feel the same. There was you, you liked me and there was an attraction between us. Once I started to see the parts of you other people didn't I started to like you too. But then she did want me and I thought I loved her so I could justify what I was doing. Then you found out and she walked away so I left. When I came back she was pretty much the only person willing to be around me. But what I finally realised was I never loved Peyton Sawyer, simply because I never knew her. She was this unattainable dream for me and I needed to explore that and I did and she just couldn't compare to the girl I thought she was."

"But you slept with her anyway."

"It was a stupid thing for me to do but the final straw that made me see exactly who she was happened after we'd slept together. In the midst of everything with Lauren she still managed to make jibes about you. I know what we did to you was awful but as far as I know you're so dignified. You don't make snide comments or hurtful remarks about her and I admire that. She had no reason to do so about you but still did."

"I slept with Nathan. It's why she hates me so much." She wasn't really sure why she told him that. Maybe it was to chase him away so she wouldn't have to open the box in her heart that housed her feelings for him and exactly examine what was in there.

"What? Does Haley know?" Brooke nodded.

"Everyone at Tree Hill knew, just before the prom there was a party and someone played the tape of us."

"You filmed it?"

"Lucas it was before I knew you and Nathan knew Haley. I was wasted and they'd broken up yet again. We were both drunk, it's not really an excuse but that's really all there was to it. To be honest before that tape got out I think we both had blotted it from our memories. When Peyton saw that tape I think at first she thought that I'd come looking for forgiveness, for what I'd done back then and how I treated her over you. I didn't though. They were always breaking up and I should have known they'd get back together the next day, drunk or not I should have let that stop me from hooking up with him. But I don't need forgiveness for that, I'd already reconciled with the fact I wasn't the girl who did those things. And I certainly wasn't looking for forgiveness for my behaviour post you. What I did was wrong yeah. But it isn't even on the radar for what she did. I loved you, you were the only person I'd ever loved. She knew that and did it anyway. She was never in love with Nathan. Maybe that doesn't justify it but I still think it's an important difference."

"Well I guess it makes sense now why she's so angry with you." She shivered against the cool night breeze. She flinched slightly as he put an arm round her drawing her into him, his hand glided up and down her arm in an attempt to take the chill away.

"You seem to be taking this awfully well for someone who said they loved me a few hours ago."

"What's to get upset about, neither you nor Nathan are the people you were back then. As Nathan said only hours ago, _'we all make mistakes but those mistakes shouldn't be the things that define us' _Brooke you haven't been that person for a long time. And in truth I'm not upset because I meant what I said. I'm in love with you, this you. The person you've become. Was that supposed to send me running for the hills?" Brooke sighed deeply, only minutes earlier she'd had the same thought.

"I don't know. Lucas even if I accept what you say about Peyton, it's more complicated than that." He placed a finger beneath her chin and turned her head to face him. As he eyes stared into her own she felt vulnerable and unnerved, like he could see into the very soul of her.

"Forget the complications for a second Brooke, just answer me this – do you now or will you ever love me?" She felt the surge of energy in the air around them, wrapped so closely with him she could feel his breath caressing her face. She couldn't find the words to answer him. They stayed like that for what felt like hours. She had no idea who initiated it but somehow his lips were burning against hers as his mouth seized her own in a kiss more intense than any she'd known in her life. Almost involuntarily her eyes closed and she sank deeper into him. As they parted her eyes stayed closed for a second while she gasped for breath. When her eyes finally parted she saw the love in his eyes. And for the second time that night she ran.

* * *

As she closed the door behind her she had chance to wonder if Nathan and Haley were aware of what Lucas had told her tonight, she couldn't believe for a second that their sudden offer to have Lauren for the night was unrelated to Lucas' plan. Regardless she had tomorrow to be angry with them, tonight she was thankful that she had the house to herself. She let out a ragged breath before stumbling to the wardrobe, she reached up to the top shelf and pulled the box down. She sat cross legged in the centre of the bed with the box in front of her. She carefully removed the lid and splayed the contents over her bed. She gingerly plucked a photo of her and Lucas together. They'd taken them in a photo booth together what felt like a lifetime ago. She was glowing, the happiness was radiating from her younger self in waves. She turned her attention to him, she was desperately searching for some clue of what he'd been thinking then. Had she always been a distraction from Peyton? All she could see was a boy with a smile on his face and a gleam in his eye, she just didn't know if she had been the one causing them. She placed the photo strip back on the bed and turned her attention to the pile of letters. There were two hundred and twenty one letters all addressed to Lucas. She had written one each day of her pregnancy after he'd left town. She'd also written one the day after she'd given birth to Lauren. She clearly remembered being left alone in that tiny room. Karen had gone off to the nursery with Haley and Nathan had disappeared – she later found out he'd been sent to collect the balloons and card Haley had ordered. Sat in that room alone she'd done the only thing she could think of doing. She'd pulled out a pen and paper and written what she had known would be her last letter to him. She'd told him about the beautiful child they'd created together. That having looked at their child she knew that no matter what had gone on she would always love him for giving her the most precious thing in her world. She knew that the final letter had been the only one that hadn't contained some form of poisonous words following from her broken, angry heart. She closed her eyes and lay back against the pillows, when her eyes fluttered open seconds later she no longer saw the room she shared with her daughter. She saw the room Lucas had grown up in. the room where they'd spent so much time, the place she'd fallen in love with him and the place she'd been when he and her 'best friend' had broken her heart. Her head was spinning and she closed her eyes again trying to drown out the voices in her head.

She jerked up as the music started, she was momentarily caught off balance to look down and see she was still dressed and was surrounded by the contents of her Lucas memory box. She shook her head and looked at her radio alarm clock 8a.m. already. She felt like she'd hardly slept at all.

_This morning I woke up with this feeling  
I didn't know how to deal with and so I just decided to myself  
I'd hide it to myself and never talk about it  
And did not go and shout it when you walked into the room  
I think I love you _

_I think I love you so what am I so afraid of  
I'm afraid that I'm not sure of a love there is no cure for  
I think I love you isn't that what life is made of  
Though it worries me to say that I never felt this way_

She slammed her hand down silencing the music. She hated irony at the best of times but to be woken up by that song did not set the day up well for her. She sadly admitted to herself that the song hit her the way it did because she did have feelings for Lucas. The part that scared her most was realising that she'd never stopped holding out for him. The past few months he'd shown himself to be the person she'd always known he was, before the Peyton drama. And the feelings that had been locked away forgotten about had simmered beneath the surface of her consciousness. Now with his declaration she could clearly feel them again, but it didn't make her happy.

* * *

"Hey." Brooke looked up from the counter she was cleaning, with the lunch rush over there was just one table, a couple drinking coffee and Brooke had almost finished getting the café ready for the evening.

"What are you doing here?"

"I figured we needed to talk."

"I don't know what you want me to say." He perched himself on one of the stools at the counter and looked at her.

"Whatever's on your mind, pretty girl." Her head jerked up to look at him then.

"Don't Luke, don't call me that." He looked embarrassed and turned his head away from her.

"Brooke if you want to tell me you didn't mean that kiss, that you don't have any feelings for me and just want to forget the entire episode then I'll do what you ask of me." Relief spread through her then, with a tinge of disappointment. "But I'll only do that if you can honestly tell me it's because you don't want me, not because you're scared and confused."

"I can't tell you anything right now. I don't know how I feel Luke. I don't even really know how you feel, we've been here before. Fair enough it wasn't love you said you felt but you said you felt something, you cared. But that's not enough Luke. It's not what you say – it's how you act that means anything."

* * *

"Hey you're back! How was Florence?" Brooke hugged Karen tightly, it was almost midnight and she'd just got back from closing the café.

"It was beautiful there." Brooke then hugged Keith too.

"I've missed you both but are you sure a week was a long enough honeymoon?" Karen stepped beside her husband and clasped his hand.

"I don't want to be on honeymoon anymore Brooke, I just want to start our life together."

"Karen that's so sweet, you both look so happy."

"Tired but happy you mean." Brooke laughed.

"I think we probably are all tired."

"How's Lauren?" Brooke brightened at the mention of her daughter.

"She's bursting with excitement, she can't wait for you guys to pick up your wedding photos. She's really missed you, she's been pouting that she didn't get to see you long enough after she'd been away so long. She's staying with Lucas tonight, she's done that most nights this week actually with me being at the café."

"How's my boy?"

"Our boy." Keith corrected her and Karen smiled up at him. Brooke almost melted at their contented, happy glow.

"Luke's fine as far as I know." Brooke didn't miss the look they exchanged at her non-committal response. "Well I think it would be wise for us to all get some sleep. Night."

* * *

It was nearing 8 and the café was slowing down. Brooke was finishing up a few small jobs before she headed home leaving Karen to lock up with Deb.

"Brooke honey you got a sec?" The two older women had been huddled together conspiratorially for most of the night. Brooke left her work and went over to them. "Is everything okay?" Brooke pulled a face at them, confused.

"Sure."

"You and Lucas haven't had a fight have you?" Brooke shook her head. "It's just well I've been home almost a week now and the two of you haven't done anything with Lauren together, it just seemed a little odd since you'd got into a routine before." Brooke shifted awkwardly from one foot to the other. Before she was forced to answer the bell chimed signalling a customer had arrived. Her relief at being saved turned to horror as she saw it was Lucas. She stayed frozen as he didn't bother greeting any of them. He pulled out a chair and climbed on it.

"Excuse me everyone, can I just have your attention for one moment please. Two weeks ago I told this woman here," He gestured towards Brooke. "that I was in love with her. I don't think she really believed me, which is understandable so I'm just here to say this – Brooke there is no one in this world that I could ever be with other than you, and I would rather spend every day of my life alone than be without you. I love you and I think that there is a chance that you feel the same. You're the one for me." Brooke felt the eyes of everyone in there staring at her, so she did the one thing she could think of, something she was getting good at. Without pausing to consider the fact it was pouring with rain and her coat was in the back she bolted out the door. She ran down the street as fast as she could despite knowing he could catch her if he tried. And she believed in her heart he would. She felt the hand wrap round her arm causing her to stop and turn. The rain was soaking through her t-shirt and her hair was plastered to her face.

"Why Lucas?"

"Because I need you to know that this is real." She shook her head.

"No I need to know why this time would be any different." He moved closer to her then.

"I'm not a kid anymore Brooke, I know exactly what I want. I've just experienced a dream come true and even before I knew I loved you I couldn't imagine sharing that with anyone besides you and our daughter. I watched you with her, I watched you in that hospital. I saw your strength and I saw your vulnerability and I fell in love with that person. I love the way you are willing to protect the people you love with your life and how you refuse to apologise for anything you do even when you're the only one who thinks it's right. I love that fact that you won't compromise on what you believe in. I love the way you opened up to me about your mother and how scared you are of hurting Lauren like she hurt you. I love the fact you care and worry about being like her because it shows me just how unlike her you are. It's different because I now know just how much you mean to me, I know I'd not survive if I ever hurt you and I know I'd die to protect you. And because we're both going get pneumonia, but if you, need to hear why I love you and why this time everything is different, I can go on all night." She couldn't tell if the drops wetting her face were rain or tears at this point. She placed her hands on either side of his face and raised herself on tip tops. And she kissed him.

_**Ok so first off the song is I Think I Love You – Partridge Family.**_

_**Second I'm sure you've all picked up on the lines from the show in their original form or slightly altered. I did adore the rain scene in the show and so wanted that to still happen in my timeline of things even if it was slightly altered.**_


	20. Grand Gestures Are Worthless

He held his breath as he watched her sleeping. Once he had realised that he was in love with her he'd been able to look back over the months he'd been in Tree Hill with hindsight. In hindsight he was able to see when it was he began to fall in love with her. He was able to acknowledge now that Lindsey had been right, for the entire time he'd known Lindsey he must have clearly shown her at least how he felt for the brunette in his bed. He was able to see how it had begun when Lauren had been sick. It had been when they had put everything aside for the mutual love of their daughter. He had been allowed to see the woman Brooke Davis had matured into. When he'd woken that morning he hadn't wanted to turn in his bed for fear the previous night had been a dream. Relief had coursed through his veins when he saw her next to him. Her eyelids began to flutter and he smiled. She looked so beautiful right then. She turned slightly in her sleep, the arm that had been hanging over the side of the bed moving to cover her bare chest as she rotated onto her back.

"Luke?" Her voice was filled with sleep as she questioned his presence.

"Hey." She blinked a few times before shifting her body to prop herself up. He could see in her eyes the memories of the previous night returning as she took in her surroundings. She took a deep breath before pushing herself from the bed and scooping her clothes from the floor.

"I should go home." He felt as though a knife pierced his heart, he felt her coldness in the harsh light of day. He sat up in the middle of the bed as she dressed.

"Do you regret last night?" She paused and looked over to him. She seemed to be struggling to find the words.

"Lucas I never stopped loving you." With that she was gone leaving him staring at the now closed door. As the door to the apartment opened and closed he was left wondering what sort of answer hers had been. Perhaps he had been naïve to believe that last night had solved the problems they had, that last night had been the start to a relationship. Maybe that had been the dream all along. The knock on the door left fresh hope surging through him as he hurriedly pulled on some clothes and rushed to the door. He was unable to stop the disappointment showing when it was Nathan's face that greeted him.

"Hey man I heard about last night, I just saw Brooke leaving as I was heading to the River court so figured I'd stop by and see how things were. From the look on your face I'd say not good." Lucas sighed and opened the door wider, standing back to allow Nathan access. "So my mom shared all the gory details of your public declaration, following by her fleeing the scene and you following. Next thing your mom gets a call asking if it's ok if Brooke stays out a while to talk. Must have been one hell of a talk if she was only just leaving." As Nathan spoke he had made his way into the small kitchen grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge and tossing another to Lucas. Lucas rubbed the back of his neck and looked down.

"We didn't really talk that much." Nathan laughed.

"Well well big brother I guess that's a good sign, that she was willing to jump your bones." Nathan's teasing was silence with just a look from the blonde. "What happened?" His tone became serious and Lucas leaned back against the wall, sliding into a sitting position.

"It was great, I went after her and she asked why now was different so I said the only things that came to mind. She kissed me, it was romantic as hell in the rain. We barely kept our hands off each other as we stumbled here. It was – amazing. I woke up this morning and just watched her. Then she woke up and pretty much bolted." Nathan let out a low whistle.

"Just like that, she didn't say anything?"

"I asked her if she regretted it, she didn't answer for a while and just said she'd never stopped loving me before she went." Nathan pulled an awkward face.

"I guess that's a good sign at least." Lucas snorted his contempt.

"One good sign doesn't cancel all the bad ones. I just wish I knew what was going on in her head."

"Luke Brooke hasn't been with anyone since you, this means something. Maybe that's why she ran."

"I just feel like she's always going to push me away." Nathan shook his head.

"One setback and you're giving up – that's weak Luke. So much for love."

"Hey! I never said I was giving up and it's more than today. After I first told her that I loved her she told me something and I didn't need to know, she only did it to test me and push me."

"Maybe she thought it was something you needed to know, Brooke isn't trying to manipulate you or put you through it to make sure you'll stay around. She's protecting herself and is genuinely a good person, maybe that's why she told you."

"It was you." Nathan frowned.

"What was me?"

"That's what she told me about." Nathan continued to frown for a few moments longer before realisation dawned.

"Luke it was a long time ago and…" Lucas held up his hand to stop him.

"I don't care Nathan. I didn't know her or you back then. It's not important." Nathan grinned.

"Haley didn't take it quite as well as you did." Lucas laughed. "She flipped out and locked herself in the bathroom. She didn't talk to me for over a week, which certainly made prom fun."

"Yeah well I guess the way I found out was slightly better, besides Hales has always been insecure about how much past experience you have." Nathan nodded.

"True, I think after being married for so long and having a child together has finally convinced her that no matter what or who I did in the past she's the only one in my future." Lucas smiled at his brother.

"Maybe I should take advice from you on how to win a girl round then." Nathan laughed.

"I don't think you want to wait that long do you?"

"Not really, today would be good, tomorrow okay. But in all honesty if I have to spend the next 6 years proving I love her I will do and if it takes forever for her to be ready then I'll wait."

"Maybe you should tell her that."

* * *

He almost opened the door and just walked in like every other time he came here, but today it didn't feel right so pulled himself up short and knocked. It was seconds before she pulled the door open. He knew she wasn't surprised to see him there. She gestured for him to come in and he did so.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay." She shrugged.

"I'm fine." He took a step closer to her.

"Brooke, what's happening in there?" His hand gestured towards her heart and she lightly smiled.

"I wouldn't worry about that Lucas, if I were you I'd be more concerned about what's happening in here." She tapped her head as she spoke. He raised his eyebrows in a question to her. She sighed and turned away from him putting distance between the pair. She stayed with her back to him as she stood staring at the array of pictures on the mantel.

"I thought after last night you…wanted what I did."

"I didn't go back with you just to get my needs satisfied if that's what you mean."

"You know I didn't mean it like that. I just thought that we were on the same page."

"Maybe we were last night. I mean what girl could resist a romantic as hell speech in the rain."

"So where are we this morning?" She slowly turned back to him.

"Lucas I meant last night with everything that I am but I think I got caught up in the moment and today that moment has gone and the truth is all the worries and insecurities and issues they're still here." He walked towards her again and she stepped back, pushed up against the mantel until she could go no further.

"Brooke if you don't give me a chance I can never show you how much I love you."

"It's not the words Lucas, you've never had a problem with words. But words won't make the problems just disappear."

"Last night when I stood up in the café and declared my love for you, I know it was mainly words, but it was the action too. Public and in front of my mom. I don't know how to prove I mean what I say, if you tell me how then I'll do it."

"I don't know either." Her words came sadly and for the first time he got a sense of the fact that she did want this as much as he did, but Nathan was right and she was scared. Somehow he had to find a way to help her through that fear.

"I guess I need to figure it out then."

* * *

He'd spent over a week away from her and it was unbearable. The only time he'd seen her was when he'd dropped Lauren off on her day off. But in that week he'd done everything imaginable to find a gesture something grand enough to win over her doubting head. He'd spoken to his mom and Keith, his brother and Haley all to no avail. None of them had been able to give him any clue as how to proceed. Until it came to him in a light bulb moment and now he was ready to show her. The bell jangled as he stepped inside the café. She appeared from the back within seconds.

"Sorry we were just clo…Luke, what are you doing here?" The last customer disappeared from the door as she spoke and he locked the door before turning back to her.

"I just came by to help you lock up, I know mom doesn't really like you being here alone." She looked taken aback but shrugged.

"I'm almost done." He nodded.

"Can I walk you home?" She hesitated for a second.

"Sure Luke." With nothing else to be said she returned to what she'd been doing as he cleared the last table out front. It didn't take long before everything was done. Brooke did the lights and grabbed her coat and keys while Lucas set the alarm. Once outside they began to stroll at a leisurely pace and Lucas was glad to note that despite everything that was happening and had happened he felt comfortable just in her presence and hoped desperately she felt the same.

"Sorry I've not been around much."

"It's okay, a little time to think things over probably wasn't a bad thing."

"I missed you." His words hung in the air and he wished he could take them back, he sensed she perhaps wasn't ready.

"I missed you too Luke, you look surprised." He smiled.

"I guess I am. I just don't want to rush you."

"Thank you for that."

"If I'm honest Brooke I've been going crazy trying to figure out what the hell I can do to make you see I mean what I say and to give this a chance."

"I know, Hales told me you'd interrogated her and Nate, I'm guessing you probably quizzed Karen and Keith too."

"Yeah I did. None of them really helped too much, except Nathan but I don't think he did it on purpose. I spoke to him the day after we…about you, Haley and their relationship. I joked about following his lead because Haley wasn't insecure anymore. He said that he didn't think I'd want to wait as long as it took him. When I replied he said I should be telling you that and not him. He was right I should tell you. Brooke I desperately hoped that I'd find this magical way this one big grand gesture to make you trust me. Today I realised that won't happen. Today I realised how I can make you see I mean everything with my whole heart. I'm not going to make a grand gesture, I plan on making a million small ones, starting with caring enough and worrying enough to come walk you home tonight. It's not about a gesture, it's about being the man you need me to be and showing you everyday in everything I do that I'm here, that I love you, that I want to be with you and that you can trust me. And to finish my little speech, what I said to Nathan was this - _today would be good, tomorrow okay. But in all honesty if I have to spend the next 6 years proving I love her I will do and if it takes forever for her to be ready then I'll wait. _Brooke I love you and I never want anyone other than you. If you're not ready then that's fine. I just want to make you happy." She stopped walking and he followed suit. He turned to look at her and saw the tears trailing down her face.

"Lucas Eugene Scott I love you, I always have. I want to believe you. I'm not ready to give you my heart again, but I'm ready to try. I'm ready to just take a chance and try and give you a shot at being the one who makes me happy. This is not going to be easy for either of us, there will probably be times where I drive you crazy and act completely irrationally."

"I'm prepared for that Brooke, you're worth it."

"How about you finish walking me home – boyfriend." His face felt like it would split open with the grin. The word had been said tentatively and he knew that while it certainly wasn't a term she'd use freely nor was it an indication of their couple status it was a promise. A promise to try and make something amazing come of their love for one another. She lent forward and gently brushed her lips against his before turning back to walking to her destination. For a stunned second he didn't move before finding his feet and catching her up. He debated briefly over his next move but couldn't stop himself at least trying. He reached for her hand. And she gave him it. They walked silently after that hand in hand through the quiet streets to her home. They paused outside the door leading directly to the bedroom she shared with their daughter. His hand cupped her cheek as he whispered.

"I do love you Brooke, I will prove that to you." She smiled and nuzzled into the warmth of his hand.

"Good." He lent in and tenderly kissed her before bidding her goodnight as she slipped inside. He breathed a huge sigh of relief. He had been so unsure of whether being honest and promising a lifetime of small considerate and consistent actions would be enough to make her give him a chance. But as Haley had told him right at the start, big gestures wouldn't work with her. Deep down he'd known that she didn't want him to give her the world, just the man she fell in love with when she was 16. And he wanted to be that person for her. He would be.


	21. When Are You Getting Married?

Brooke stretched in her bed curious as to what had woken her. As she came into full consciousness she realised it was the smell of bacon. She glanced over at the clock beside her bed and saw it was just 7a.m. She knew Karen had closed up last night and she herself was due to open this morning so was quite surprised that Karen was up this early making breakfast. The smell was enough to tempt her from her bed, she felt a chill as she slid from beneath her covers and grabbed her robe before quietly leaving the room. She followed the tantalising aroma to the kitchen to be greeted by a sight she was unfamiliar with.

"Lucas?" Her voice was tinged with disbelief. Startled he looked up at her and smiled.

"Morning." She shook her head in amusement.

"What are you doing here?" He laughed and gestured around him.

"Making breakfast for my favourite girls and my mom and Keith too." She felt slightly bewildered seeing him here.

"But why?" He paused and turned to her.

"Why not?" She smiled again and finally sat at the table her eyes glancing over the array of food. "So there is an ulterior motive to this surprise actually." She looked up at her unable to contain her curiosity. "I wanted to make you breakfast and take Lauren to school before going and opening the café."

"What are you talking about?" He laid down the pan in his hand and came to kneel in front of her. He gently took both her hands between his and looked deep into her eyes.

"Brooke I meant what I said when we were on the book tour. That we'd find your place, and after the work you did on the dresses for mom's wedding it is blatantly obvious where that place is. Now we just have to get you there, which means today I will be working at the café and you will be sketching. You told me when Lauren was in the hospital that my mom had said that if you managed to get enough designs made up that she'd consider leasing a store for you, well it's time for that to happen. And it starts today." She was unable to stop the happy glow she felt, but then reality hit.

"Luke I appreciate it I do, but it's not possible. I know you think you're giving me time to do this but I can't take time away from work, I need that money because I still meant what I said about Lauren and I needing our own place."

"I'm not taking your money Brooke, I work there, you work here, you get paid as usual." She began to shake her head.

"I can't do that Luke."

"Brooke we both know that after the money I got from my book sales and the advance on the next one I have more than I can spend right now, and if you'd let I'd pay for place for you both and pay the bills while you get your life where you want it to be, but I haven't offered that purely because I know there is not a hope in hell of you agreeing to it. Please let me do this for you, a couple of a days a week when I can around the job with Nate. If it makes you feel any better when you have your store and you're making money you can pay me back, but don't just say no when it's your dream."

"I think I'm going to cry." One hand escaped from his grip to rest over her mouth as she tried to stop the tears welling up. Once she'd gotten her emotions within her control once more her hands cupped his face. "Lucas Scott you are amazing, thank you for doing this for me. And thank you even more for respecting that I have boundaries to how much I can accept." She leant forward and pressed a kiss to his lips. His arms wrapped around her. He abruptly pulled away leaving her disorientation and wanting more.

"I'd love to do that more but I think something's going burn soon." She laughed as he hurried back to the cooker.

"Lauren is going to love that you're here." He glanced over his shoulder and smiled at her.

"Good I'm glad she adores her dad so much, though I'd like to think someone else loves that I'm here too." Brooke bent her head as she blushes.

"Someone else does. I better wake her up."

* * *

Brooke smiled happily as she glanced up at the clock, it was almost closing and it made her smile for two very important reasons. Firstly and most obviously the fact that the work day was done. Secondly because since he'd showed up a little over a week ago to walk her home and inform her that he had no grand gesture planned for her just a million small ones Lucas had showed up the three nights she'd locked up since. Tonight would be the fourth. She hadn't asked him to come nor had he given any inclination he would, but she smiled anyway for her heart told her he would be here within the next fifteen minutes, helping her finish up and lock the door before strolling home beside her hand in hand. They didn't always speak when he walked her home, but that wasn't something she minded. She'd always enjoyed the peace of her walk home after a busy day, something which was still true. However she had to admit the peace and calm of the evening was enhanced when he was walking beside her. She heard the chime telling her the door was opening and looked up with a smile already on her face. She wasn't disappointed. There he was, but today was different. Today he'd brought Gerber daises. The small smile she'd had for his welcome flourished into a wide grin as she left the table she was clearing and walked over to him.

"The smile on your face right now is worth all the worry that this might count as a grand gesture." She laughed.

"Well maybe it is technically a slightly grand gesture Lucas, bringing my favourite flowers and all, but no one said grand gestures are bad. They just don't mean much when there aren't any small, day-to-day ones too. And Lucas they're beautiful. Thank you." She leaned closer and kissed him.

"You're beautiful." She grinned again before disappearing with the flowers. He took up where she'd left off and when she returned the tables were all ready for the next day.

"You'll be doing me out of a job at this rate if I'm not careful." He glanced up and smiled.

"Only because you're made for better things. One day Brooke Davis you'll be a huge name designer just like Chanel or Gucci, you'll have more money than you know what to do with and this café and Tree Hill will be a million miles away." She sensed the half jesting tone to his voice but his words struck a chord nevertheless.

"Luke I don't want any of that, it was my dream once. But now my dream is a happy medium between my old dream and my current life. I want what Karen has here really. A family, a place that's home and you feel safe. Somewhere that's familiar where all your friends are, but enough success to provide for my child. I don't want the stars Lucas, I want a little shop of my own, with my own clothes, my daughter and you." He covered the ground between them in slow steps and pulled her into his arms, he embraced her tightly and she nestled into the hollow beneath his chin. She felt so secure.

"I want to give you your dream Brooke, whatever that may be. But I'm sure glad that I'm in." She smiled and pulled her head back to look at him.

"It's always been you." His lips caught her own in a passionate kiss and she began to feel light headed. The feel of his arms around her and the warmth of his body against hers combined with the feeling of falling in love with him all over again sent her reeling with its heady potency. As his lips left hers they both were panting for breath.

"I love you Brooke."

"I love you too Lucas." He smiled before pulling her in to him again, she felt as though he were trying to merge them into one. Reluctantly she pulled away. "I'd better get finished up here and get home before your mom starts to worry." He laughed but let her go. Once the alarm was set and the doors locked they began the walk to her home. The nights were getting colder and she shivered. He gently prised his hand from hers and wrapped his arm round her shoulders drawing her close to him.

"Maybe you design a warmer coat." She laughed.

"It's at Nathan and Haley's, they have a lot of my spare clothes in their spare room. I just keep forgetting to get it or other things just seem more important." He shook his head at her.

"Maybe I'll have to go get it for you then." As they reached the corner of her street she decided to say what had been on her mind since leaving the café.

"Luke, I think that…" She trailed off and stopped walking, she wanted to see the look on his face when she said her next words. He stopped too and turned to look at her. "I think I'm ready to tell Lauren we're dating." Her heart quickened at the joyous look on his face.

"Are you sure? You said you needed to be sure before we told her." She smiled bashfully.

"I am sure."

"Oh god Brooke. I think I must be the happiest guy on the planet right now." He wrapped her in his arms and squeezed her tight. She laughed. As he set her back on her feet and they took the few steps to her home she spoke again.

"Will you come by tomorrow? Before school, I just…now I'm ready I'm excited to tell her."

"Of course I will. You have no idea how happy you've made me Brooke."

* * *

Lauren sat in the chair opposite Brooke and Lucas. Lucas was lounged back looking totally relaxed while she herself was sat forward leaning towards her daughter her hands clasped in her lap very tense. Deep down she knew her daughter would likely be happy but she still felt apprehensive.

"Lauren honey, you know how grandma Karen and Keith used to live in separate houses but spend a lot of time together, they'd go out places just the two of them and kiss and hug, well that's called dating honey. It's what happens when two people who like or love each other and want to spend time together. It's a relationship. Understand?"

"I think so. Did Uncle Nathan and Aunt Haley used to date too?" Brooke smiled.

"Yes they did honey before they got married they used to date. Well sweetie for the past couple of weeks your dad and I have gone on a few dates too. And we just wanted to talk to you and see how you feel about us dating." Lauren jumped to her feet and screamed. Brooke couldn't move she was so stunned by her daughter's reaction and Karen and Keith both hurtled into the room. As Brooke was about to jump up and hug her daughter Lauren began to jump up and down, the scream stopped and a smile covered her face. All four adults breathed a sigh of relief. Lauren hurled herself onto her parents and hugged them tightly.

"Does that mean you love daddy?" Brooke smiled at her daughter.

"I do baby." Lauren's attention switched to Lucas.

"And you love mommy?"

"More than anything – except you." Lauren jumped back up and began to dance around, pausing to look at them both.

"When you getting married can I be flower girl again like at grandma Karen's wedding? I've still got my dress mommy." Brooke froze.

"Honey we're just dating, we're just spending time together." Lauren paused and a frown covered her face.

"Grandma Karen you love Keith right? And Keith you love Grandma Karen?" The pair nodded at the girl. "And Uncle Nathan loves Aunt Haley and she loves him." Again the older couple nodded. "And you just said you loved each other." Her attention back on her parents. "And you said that people date when they love each other and it's the same as Uncle Nathan and Aunt Haley and Grandma Karen and Keith so you must be getting married too." Brooke sighed.

"Lauren that's a little different. See getting married is a really big step and your daddy and I have only been dating a couple of weeks." Lauren frowned again.

"So will you get married next year?" Brooke shifted uncomfortably.

"Lauren, your mommy and I love each very much and we both love you too. But sometimes grown ups well they have grown up reasons for doing things or not doing things. And sometimes when you're a grown up and you love someone you can't know what's going to happen, you just have to trust that what is meant to happen will happen, when you're ready. I don't know if mommy and I will get married, or when it will happen if we do. But I promise that if one day we decide we do want to marry each other then you will be the first to know. And you'll be flower girl and we'll even get you a new dress."

"I want you to get married, so we can all live together like Hannah does with her mommy and daddy." Brooke stood up and went over to her daughter.

"I know you do sweetheart, and one day that might happen, but it's not right now."

**Coming up will be a Brucas sex scene, I find those scenes incredibly difficult to write so if anyone can help please message me, it would be much appreciated.**


	22. Ready For Forever

**Sorry this update has been so long in coming, I've had two essays to write for my degree and my son has been ill, hopefully I'll have the next one done in a day or so to make up for being so slow with this one.**

Brooke could barely contain her curiosity, she'd never been known for her patience and surveying the café and the people in it, her family, scurrying round preparing for a family dinner as demanded by Karen she was dying to blurt out the question on her mind. The last time Karen had insisted on a family get together with everyone she and Keith had announced their engagement, Brooke had a feeling there was definitely a reason for tonight other than the generic ' we're family' line that they'd all been fed. She lurched forward to catch baby Hannah. Hannah was finding her feet now and beginning to stray away from the support of the furniture, however it was still early days for the ten month old and her baby feet didn't always manage to keep her stable. Brooke caught her before she hit the ground and scooped her up into her arms. It seemed like a lifetime ago that her own daughter had been so small. Brooke kissed Hannah before strapping her into the highchair and taking a seat as the hustle calmed and everyone sat. It was on the tip of her tongue to demand an explanation for the get together but she noticed the way Keith covered Karen's hand with his own bestowing a loving gaze on her. He cleared his throat and they all looked to him.

"It probably hasn't escaped anyone's attention that the last time we asked you all to dinner we announced our engagement, and since it's not a holiday or anyone's birthday you're probably all questioned if there's a reason for this. Well there is. Karen and I have had some incredibly unexpected news, but we're happy despite the shock and hope you all will be too. Karen's pregnant." For Brooke the world stopped. She felt literally frozen and could only watch the others. Shock wasn't a strong enough word for the reaction from Lucas, she could clearly see how stunned he was. Haley however laughed. Everyone turned to her quizzically.

"I'm sorry I'm not laughing at you it's just…well when you said you wanted us all to get together because we're family I didn't see this coming at all. In fact I just thought that it was a fortunate turn of events because it would mean Nathan and I would be able to tell you all about our pregnancy. I can't believe we're pregnant together Karen." Haley rushed round the table to hug Karen tightly the happiness radiating from her.

"Congratulations you two." Karen seemed genuinely happy at the news, not remotely upset at having the announcement of her pregnancy taken over. As Keith, Nathan, Haley and Deb descended into conversation Brooke watched as Karen approached her son. "Are you okay honey?" The almost stern expression on his face finally broke into a smile as he hugged his mother.

"I know I always told you I wanted a baby brother or sister but I meant when I was like 7, waiting until I'm 23 wasn't quite what I had in mind. I'm happy for you ma." As the chaos turned into normality in which babies were the hot topic of conversation over the meal Brooke had still yet to voice an opinion. She remained silent still watching everyone else's interaction. She alternated between hearing the conversation and becoming lost in thought.

"To be honest I was hesitant when Nathan said about trying for another baby, not because Hannah is still so young since we did always say we wanted our children to be close in age but because of the premature labour, I almost didn't want another at all just because of the fear that something like that would happen again. But I spoke to my doctor who assured me that having had a premature birth before didn't mean I'd have one again, that sometimes people are just unlucky. In the end I guess I couldn't just let fear rule our lives." Haley's smile was so bright Brooke almost had to shield her eyes. She was incredibly happy for her friend and wished she was able to congratulate her, however she felt it would make the fact she hadn't done so for Karen and Keith even more obvious. She stood and began to clear the empty plates disappearing into the kitchen. Lucas went to go after her but was stopped by Karen who went instead.

"Too much pregnancy talk sweetheart?" Brooke whirled round to face the woman she had come to look upon as a mother. She quickly averted her gaze unable to lie to Karen while looking her in the eye.

"Just a little off tonight." Karen stepped closer to her.

"Brooke you clearly have an opinion on this pregnancy, be honest with me." Brooke sighed, Karen knew her too well after all this time.

"Are you happy? I mean I know Keith said you were but I just…are you really or is that just him?" Karen frowned and Brooke elaborated. "It's just when you were dating Andy a few years ago you said that you walked away because he wanted children and a family and you didn't, that you'd already done that whole thing. That you were too old to do it again and now 3 years later you're pregnant. I know Keith loves Luke, but I also know he always did want his own children and…" Karen held her hand up to pause Brooke's ramble.

"Brooke, when I was with Andy he did want children and I didn't. Keith did want children but it's not something we planned, I think he knew that the time had passed. To be honest I know I'm only 41 but I thought I might be hitting menopause so when the doctor told me I was pregnant I was surprised, very surprised. The situation is different and I certainly didn't plan this. But it's happened and I love Keith very much and he wants this baby and the way I see it is that Lucas was unplanned, Nathan was unplanned, and Lauren was unplanned. But each of those unplanned children have brought untold joy to their parents, sometimes the things we don't plan are the things that are meant to be. I know I will love this baby just as much as I love Lucas. So yes, despite what I said when Andy and I parted, I'm happy about this baby." Brooke smiled.

"I didn't mean to dampen things Karen, I just needed to be sure this is what you want." Karen hugged her.

"And I love you for that." As the pair parted Brooke smiled.

"Congratulations Karen." Karen smiled back before grabbing the large chocolate cake from the counter.

"Come on or there will be uproar if this doesn't get on plates soon." Brooke followed Karen back out to the rest of the family feeling light and happy again. She hurried to Haley and Nathan and hugged them both bestowing best wishes upon them before doing the same to Keith. As she slipped into her seat between her daughter and Lucas she reached for his hand. She glanced at him and smiled.

"Looks like sometimes things do work out." Luke smiled back at her.

"Yeah they do pretty girl." Brooke felt her body buzz upon hearing him say those two words to her, it felt like a dream. Life was good and things were going great, until the panic set in as the thought suddenly hit her. In around 7 months time there'd be a baby in the house – a baby who would need a bedroom. And in a house that was already too small it became clear that the day she had dreaded was here already.

* * *

Brooke cursed and hurled the pen in her hand across the room just as Lucas stepped through the door, the flying pen hit him in the face. He frowned.

"That's an interesting way to greet your boyfriend." Brooke shook her head.

"Sorry, frustrated I guess." He came further in and sat beside her glancing down at the paper on the table.

"So frustrated that the pen needed to be disposed of. What's wrong?"

"Well when we were on your book tour I told you how Lauren and I needed our own place soon because this place was pretty small for everyone, well now everyone includes a baby so it's time we left. Unfortunately looking at what I can actually afford is frustrating because they suck."

"You're not being kicked out, there's time."

"I could have 7 days or 7 months Luke fact is I don't have the money to get anywhere that's a decent enough size or location for us. It's hard because I want Lauren to have a good home and I know that having a big house on a nice street isn't necessarily the way to create a good home but I also don't want her living in a hole somewhere." Lucas bit his lip. He took her hand and pulled her to her feet.

"Let's go, there's something I have to show you." Brooke protested, she didn't like being surprised but he wouldn't budge. They drove for a while before pulling up on a street about 3 blocks from Nathan and Haley's place. The house they had parked in front of had a FOR SALE board in the garden. Lucas got out the car and she followed suit. She watched bemused as he removed the sign from its upright position and laid it on the ground. He then headed for the door and she followed.

"Luke what are you doing?" He smiled at her and grabbed her hand.

"We're looking at this house." The exterior of the house was amazing, though the interior was in need of some repair and TLC to get it up to scratch. As they wandered around the house Brooke became more curious as to why they were there. When the tour was complete and they found themselves back in the entrance hall Lucas turned to her. "What do you think of it?"

"It has potential, it could be amazing if someone took the time to restore it and make the inside as amazing as the outside." Lucas shifted from one foot to the other.

"I think the person who bought it would do that." He grinned and she narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "Brooke I wasn't going to tell you this but I just bought this house. I saw it and thought it was great and close to Nathan and Haley and I just had this vision of the three of us here as a family. Me making breakfast in the morning and then us all sitting down together, Lauren feeding bits of bacon to the dog under the table thinking that neither of us notice while we both just share this knowing look. You getting excited that the baby is kicking for the first time and me reaching across to feel it, Lauren getting excited that we can make our own nursery just like so long ago when we did it for Haley and Nathan. I know that we're not there yet but I just knew that one day we will be and that this should be our home." Brooke was stunned. She had slowly begun to rebuild the idea of her future to once again include Lucas. The fact that he was so willing to put what he had on the line when there was no guarantee his dream would come true touched her.

"Luke that's really sweet, one day it would make a nice home for a family." He shook his head.

"I want you and Lauren to live here now. If you're leaving my mom's then live here. I wasn't moving in until we were a family anyway so you're not putting me out in any way and this way you know Lauren has a good home, a garden to play in. She's in a great neighbourhood, close to family. Then maybe one day we will be a family here, there's no reason for it to sit empty until that day when you both need it now." Pride almost stepped in and made her refuse, but truth be told it was an amazing thing for Lucas to have done buying the place in the first place, that he was so ready to compromise on his dream just to give Brooke what she wanted and needed for her and their daughter almost made her cry. She did the one thing she could and hugged him.

"Thank you."

* * *

Brooke tossed and turned, like she had done for the past four nights, since Lucas had given her the keys to the house. She just couldn't rest. She heard a noise in the kitchen and pulled herself from her bed.

"Hey." Karen turned to face the owner of the voice and smiled at Brooke. Brooke followed Karen's lead and poured herself a glass of water.

"Still not sleeping?" Brooke shook her head.

"Karen I can't settle, it's just plaguing me."

"What is?"

"This situation with Lucas, and with the house. It's just not right, it's not what I want."

"Brooke it's 1am and you need some sleep, but if that's really not going to happen then go and see Lucas right now, wake him up and sort this out."

"Are you serious?" Karen nodded.

"I am, things obviously need to be said." With that Brooke grabbed her coat and threw it on over her pyjamas before making her way to Lucas' apartment. She felt bad waking him and almost certainly any neighbours that heard her viciously banging on the door. He pulled it open looking so gorgeous and rumpled, rubbing sleep from his eyes. She barged past him and into the apartment.

"What are you doing here?"

"I needed to talk to you." He yawned and sat down, she chose to stay standing, meaning she could pace while she spoke. "Lucas I just haven't been able to sleep or think straight since the day at the house and it's been driving me insane and I know now that it's because that house was a dream of yours, a dream of a family home for the three and us and I feel bad because here you are just giving it to Lauren and I when it was a dream for us to be together. But it's not really guilt I feel, I guess it's not anyway because Lucas the truth, the truth that I finally see now, is this – I trust you. And more than that Luke, I see that vision of us living together as a family and…and I want that Luke. I love you and I feel like moving into that place without you is just prolonging something that has been 6 years in coming and it seems insane to be wasting more time when we are finally on the same page."

"You're kind of rambling there." She smiled.

"Lucas let's all live together." Brooke waited with baited breath for what felt like an eternity for his response, to say she was disappointed would be an understatement.

"Brooke I'm not sure that's a good idea. You wanted to take things slow and I never wanted you to feel like I had to live because you were, it's just the way things happened that meant you needed that place, but I don't want you to be rushed into something you're not ready for."

"I'm ready Luke, I love you and if you want me then I'm ready to begin the rest of our lives." A grin broke out over his face and he launched up and pulled her close to him.

"If I want you? You must be crazy to think there's any doubt over that. Of course I want you Brooke." As he pulled his torso away from hers he was able to stare deep into her eyes making her knees go weak. His hand cupped her cheek and she nuzzled into it. "Brooke Penelope Davis I will never want anyone else and to be a proper family with you is all I want in this world." In response her lips met with his in a kiss that left them both breathless. Brooke felt in her bones where that kiss was leading them and gently nodded at him. Her breath hitched in her throat as he led her to the bedroom. True it was neither their first time together nor the first time since he'd returned but they both knew this was different. They were different. Tonight was a recognition of the love they shared, of their existence on the same emotional, mental and soon to be physical level. Tonight was a celebration that despite the past they'd found their way back to one another. Everything would be different now. Last time she'd been here she had been caught up in the notion of their romance, but tonight she knew would break down the final barrier to her heart and there would be no going back. As if he could read her thoughts and hear her hesitation he paused and turned to her. As the back of his right hand slowly caressed her face he whispered.

"We don't have to do this if you're not ready." His voice was husky and she felt the desire he had for her swimming in waves around them. It would almost be easy now to turn away, to run home to the safe haven with her daughter. But the commitment she'd already made was engraved in her mind. And more than anything she loved him. She wanted to feel his hands stroking her skin, to feel his lips covering every inch of her flesh. She wanted to feel alive again like only he had ever made her. So she answered him with nothing but a kiss.

She stood still as he slipped the clothes from her body, her hands fluttered around her middle, self-conscious of the tiny silver marks that showed her body had once housed their child. He gently pulled her hands away and knelt to kiss each tiny mark on her once again tight, flat stomach. She hadn't felt as beautiful as she did at that moment in more years than she cared to remember. As terrifying as letting go was, letting Lucas have every part of her, being with him finally felt like coming home.

Lucas laid her gently against the soft sheets as he placed butterfly kisses around her collarbone. The last time had been so passionate and so frantic, but now they were both happy to let things unfold. To savour the moment both had unknowingly longed for months, perhaps even years, to be one entity, breathing together joining in love and most importantly to Brooke, trust. She whimpered softly as he entered her, she clung to him, gently rocking in rhythm with his movements.

"Lucas…" His name was barely a whisper from her lips as she felt the wave of ecstasy building within her.

"I love you." His eyes pierced hers as he brought them both to climax. Her body quivered, practically vibrating as he pulled her into his strong arms, gently running his hand up and down her spine. "I never want to be without you. I will love you forever Brooke Davis." She felt her heart quicken at his words. She tilted her head back so she was able to look into his eyes.

"I'm ready for forever."


	23. The Dream

**Two apologies, one for not updating as soon as I said I would and one for the shortness of this chapter, however I am updating 3 chapters together now to make it for it.**

Lucas held his breath as he watched her sleeping, he remembered another morning similar to this, and he just hoped that this time would be different, that she wouldn't run. Last night had been the most intense and intimate night of his life. She'd taken a huge step with him and he didn't want her to wake up and see things differently. He wanted to spend every morning like this, laid beside her while she slept thanking god that he was lucky enough to get to be in her life, to know her and love her – and be loved by her.

"What's wrong Broody?" Her voice startled him from his thoughts he gazed at her beautiful face and felt a smile break out over his face.

"Nothing, this is perfect." She smiled back a hint of a blush covering her cheeks.

"I hate to ruin the moment – but I need to leave." He felt the disappointment threaten to overwhelm him. "I have to get Lauren ready for school, but maybe you could come back with me. We could tell her that we'll be moving in to the house as a family. If you want to."

"Nothing would make me happier." Just like that his world felt complete. He had his daughter and the woman he loved more than life, everything else was just details that seemed insignificant. He watched her as she moved about the room, he grinned, amused that she felt able to raid his wardrobe for some more appropriate clothing for the walk home than the pyjamas she'd arrived in the night before. He stretched out before pulling himself from the warmth of the bed and padding over to her as she pulled on his Keith Scott Motors hoodie. She appeared to consider her reflection, clad in his top and her pyjamas before sighing and smiling in the glass at him.

"It could be worse." He snaked his arms around her waist and bent his knees in order to rest his chin on her shoulder. He kissed her cheek softly.

"I think you look amazing." She laughed.

"That doesn't surprise me, isn't there always something sexy about a girl in her guy's clothes."

"It's not what you're wearing, it's just you." She twisted her head in order to place a kiss on his lips.

"You need clothes mister, Lauren will be wondering where I am."

"And my mom will tell her, she'll be happy." Brooke smiled at him.

"She'll be happier when we get there and tell her we've all moving into the house."

"Our home."

"Our home. Now shift it buddy."

* * *

"Mommy, daddy!" The ball of energy that was their daughter hurled herself at them when they stepped through the door.

"Well hello you two." Karen smiled at them, Lucas knew his mother well enough to know that she was thrilled they seemed to be finally working things out.

"We have some news." The words were out of his mouth before he could even consider pausing to greet anyone. Keith walked into the kitchen and wrapped an arm round Karen's shoulder as the three waited on the news. Lucas took Brooke's hand and smiled at her before turning his attention back to the others. "Last night we decided that…we're going to live together, in our family home." Smiles broke out on Karen and Keith's faces, both overjoyed at the news.

"Will grandma and uncle Keith come too?" Lucas knelt to his daughter's level.

"Honey it's just going to be the three of us, grandma and uncle Keith will stay here, remember how they're going to have a baby. They'll all live here as a family and we'll live at the house we showed you the other day as family. We'll still see each other all the time, and you'll be able to visit whenever you want. But in our house you'll get to have your own room. That'll be great won't it?" The little girl seemed to ponder things for a few minutes.

"I guess so, I'll miss them though. But I'm glad I'll be with you daddy." Lucas smiled at his daughter and hugged her close. He couldn't believe he was this lucky. As Brooke hurried Lauren along getting her ready for school and Keith disappeared off to prepare for work Lucas was happy to be left alone with his mother. The two sat together at the table with a pot of fresh coffee.

"Mom, when Keith and I played ball the other day he told me about what the doctor said. That your pregnancy was high risk given your age and stuff. I know in her heart Brooke wants to make something from this designing thing, but to do that she'd need to cut back her hours, which she wouldn't do. Especially the way things are for you. And also, I don't want you to think that I don't appreciate everything you've done for me, because I really do, but the truth is mom it would have been nice to not sit in the café doing my homework because you had to work. Things are different now, you don't have to work, physically be there for everything. You can enjoy this baby like you couldn't afford to enjoy me. Deb already has Hannah while Nate and Hales work, she'll also have the new baby, she doesn't have the time to oversee Tric, you don't have the strength to run the café, maybe it's time to find a manager for both places. I'm not saying install managers and walk away, be involved, but limit yourself to office based stuff, the big things not the day to day things. I know it's probably huge chance and it will be hard but I just think that for you, Keith and your baby…and for Brooke it's the right thing to do." Karen rubbed the back of her neck absentmindedly.

"Lucas, Brooke does need to take a step back to achieve the things she wants to achieve, and you're right if I need her she will do that. Deb won't have time to manage Tric properly. And this pregnancy will be a lot harder than when I had you. It doesn't surprise me Keith spoke to you, maybe he thought you'd be able to talk some sense into me because he couldn't. I just don't know if I can do what you want. I spent my life building that place, sometimes it feels more like home than home does, handing it over to someone else seems impossible."

"Mom the café feels like home to me too, but life moves on. After everything I've been through I know that nothing in my life would be worth anything with Brooke and Lauren, sure you love the café and I'm not saying sell it and walk away. But it's established now and good business, it doesn't need you as much as it used to. But Keith and this baby need you so much more."

"You make one hell of a case, I'll think about it."

* * *

"Wow I can't believe how fast you move Brooke." Brooke smiled at the pair as they walked in the almost finished room, she was putting the finishing touches to the furniture arrangement in the guest room. Lucas leaned against the door frame watching as Haley surveyed the room, he'd already showed her the master and en-suite as well as Lauren's room and the bathroom. Brooke had decided that they'd have just one guest bedroom, leaving the other bedroom as a study for Lucas, with an extra desk for her to design at. Once Brooke completed the guest bedroom she was already planning the study. She'd chosen the furniture and it was waiting downstairs in the packaging to be installed into the room, once she'd decorated. Lucas had been surprised when Brooke had chosen to decorate the house herself, especially since the debacle with Hannah's nursery. But even he had to admit that between the two of them they'd done a good job, in a remarkable time too. Brooke had taken two weeks holiday from the café and thrown herself into the house, determined to make it liveable within her holiday period. The upstairs most certainly would be ready, and most of the lower level too, but the kitchen certainly wouldn't be. It would be another week before the contractors would come and rip out the old shabby kitchen and replace it with the one Brooke had chosen. There was no doubt that within the month it would be home.

"Well I guess I was motivated. I can't wait for us to live here together." Brooke had come to stand beside him and slipped an arm round his waist, resting her head on his arm. Haley turned and grinned at them.

"Maybe you should have a house warming party to show off all your hard work." The comment was off the cuff and not designed to spark any great plans but Brooke latched on to Haley's words.

"Yeah we should, before we do the downstairs Luke we should throw a party. So that any damage doesn't matter, any spills or whatever won't matter because the floors still need stripping."

"Brooke the floors are meant to be stripped on Tuesday, it's Thursday, that's not really much time to plan a party as well as do the study." Brooke turned back to Haley.

"Tutor mom since it was your idea and everything…" Haley sighed.

"I'll organise the damn party." Brooke gave a little clap and hop.

"Yay Haley…Saturday night just a few close friends nothing huge."

"I promise, let's just hope it goes better than the last party I threw." All three remembered the party she'd thrown back in high school when she and Nathan had started dating. So much drama.

* * *

The doorbell rang once again and Lucas answered it.

"What up dawg?" He was stunned to see his childhood friend and now NBA star Antwon Turner aka Skills on his doorstep. He smiled and hugged his friend.

"I can't believe a big star like you is here." As the pair parted Skills shrugged.

"Well Haley calls and tells me you and Brooke are throwing a party cos you guys doing the family thing finally – where else would I be?" As Skills went further into the party to greet other old friends Lucas surveyed the room. Brooke was in hot conversation with Rachel, he could tell how thrilled she was to have her there. He chuckled to himself still unable to see quite how the two ended up as such close friends when on paper they should have been sworn enemies. Deb had been kind enough to have both Hannah and Lauren, allowing his mom and Keith to attend as well as Nathan and Haley, judging by the looks on Nathan and Keith's faces he could only assume the two females were discussing pregnancy. With the people he and Brooke loved most gathering he made his way over to her. He turned the music off and gained everyone's attention.

"I just wanted to thank everyone for coming tonight, especially with only two days notice, blame Haley and Brooke for that one. It means a lot to Brooke and I that you'd all come here tonight to celebrate with us, that finally we're where we are supposed to be. That after so long we got it together and we're making that step to living, with our beautiful little girl, as a family. My life is now complete, nothing could make tonight anymore perfect." His speech was cut off by the sarcastic sounding applause. He craned his neck to see who it was. As the crowd parted he saw.

"Well I think I know one thing that could make life better." One hand ran over the extended abdomen. "Say hello to daddy baby." He felt the colour drain from his face, his stomach dropped and he felt nauseous. Brooke snatched her hand from his. Life was certainly not perfect anymore.

**To brucas makes it great I was pretty surprised when you reviewed chapter 20 and saw this coming. But things never run smooth so it had to be done.**


	24. Everything's Different for Me Now

She couldn't find her voice, she also couldn't feel.

"Aren't you going to say something Luke, I mean here I am just 3 weeks before I'm due to give birth to our baby making the effort to come find you so you wouldn't miss another child's birth." Brooke felt as though she'd been slapped at her words, everyone in the room knew they were aimed maliciously at Brooke.

"No…it can't be." Peyton's face broke into a slow smile.

"Sure it can Luke, we all know what's possible between two consenting adults." Peyton's gaze flitted from Lucas to rest on Brooke. "I didn't ruin your party did I?" still Brooke couldn't find her voice.

"Pregnant or not if you don't get the hell out of here I will kick your formerly scrawny now hugely fat ass the hell out of this house." The redhead confronted the blonde while the others looked on amazed by the turn of events.

"You wouldn't dare touch me, not when I've got Lucas' baby in my belly." The sound of hand connecting with face reverberated through the house.

"Didn't go anywhere near the baby did I?" Peyton looked stunned. "Now get out." With one hand clutched her red cheek Peyton waddled to the door. She turned back.

"This isn't even close to over." With that parting shot she was gone. No one in the room dared utter a word. Brooke felt Lucas' hand search hers out, and she ran. She was in the car before Lucas even reached the door, as she started up the engine he pounded on her window begging her to wait. She reversed out of the driveway to what should have been home and drove back to Karen's. The drive was done robotically, the AC was blasting despite the already cool weather and the stereo was blaring loudly. But she didn't feel the cold nor hear the noise. The image of a pregnant Peyton emblazoned on her brain. She knew he'd follow her. Reaching her destination she switched off the engine before resting her head against the wheel, her hands gripping it tightly above her head. It wasn't until she shook herself from the position in order to head inside that she caught sight of herself in the rear-view mirror, she only then realised she'd been crying. She wasn't in the house more than two minutes before the door opened.

"Brooke…" His voice trailed off and she turned to face him not moving from her position in the doorway, leaning against the frame was the only thing keeping her standing. "I'm sorry." It seemed so inadequate. True he hadn't actually done anything wrong, she'd known he'd slept with Peyton more or less as soon as he'd done it. And they were only just tolerating one another then. How things had changed in the past nine months. But his apology seemed worthless considering the devastation his mistake was about to cause them.

"I don't know what to say Luke." He looked so heartbroken.

"Brooke, what happened was a mistake, you know that, I never thought for a second this would happen. Just an hour ago my life was perfect and now…"

"I know the feeling. Just promise me something."

"Anything."

"Sell the house, if it can't be our home I just don't want it to be hers."

"What are you talking about? Brooke this doesn't change how I feel, I love you and I want my life to be with you. This just complicates things a little." She felt the tears threatening to fall, it crushed her to do this.

"No Luke, it changes everything. You need to be with Peyton now, we both know she wouldn't be here if that wasn't what she wanted. Your place is with her, with your baby."

"I love you, and I want my place to be with you and our child." Brooke shook her head. She so desperately wanted to take him in her arms, whisper it would be okay and wipe his tears away. But it wouldn't be okay.

"Lauren and I have managed this far on our own. You said yourself that in your head in your plan you get to be there from the start with your baby, this is your chance."

"Please don't leave me. I know I'm hurting you by being so stupid, but please don't leave."

"Luke leaving is hurting me as much as it hurting you but one of us has to be strong enough to do the right thing. Luke the right for that baby is for you to be there." His tears seemed to have evaporated by this point and were replaced with anger. His fist connected with the wall and she jumped.

"I hate her Brooke. I hate Peyton so much and right now I hate that baby, because it is taking you away from me. And now I hate myself too for feeling like that. I feel like I'm turning into Dan." She almost laughed at him then.

"We're both so afraid of you being Dan, and the funny thing is we don't think he's the same person." He seemed tired as he looked at her, he sank back into the chair and she stepped further into the room perching on the couch.

"What do you mean?" She swallowed and took a deep breath.

"You buy into Dan Scott the act, but you don't know the things I know. If anything Dan loves you more than Nathan." He scoffed at that. "While you were gone he kept showing up, doing nice things for us and the baby. Eventually Karen just called him on it. He knew he'd made a mistake leaving Tree Hill and hooking up with Deb, so he faked how bad his injury was. He could have rehabbed. He decided to quit college and beg your mom to take him back. He wanted to raise you with her. But he owed it to Deb to explain. He went over there just before he came back to Tree Hill, or so was the plan. Deb shared her news first – she was pregnant. He never told her he was leaving. He'd already walked away from your mom, he took the easy way out, support the pregnant girlfriend who he hadn't already hurt. The night of their rehearsal dinner he came back. He sat outside your mom's house and watched her. He knew he was making a mistake marrying Deb, he opened the car door and made it all the way up to the door, then he heard someone else in there with her and he left. And married Deb. The night you were born he drove to Tree Hill, he bought your mom flowers at the gift shop and little bear for you. He didn't come in though because just as he was about to come over to you both, the nurse handed you to Keith and called him your dad. So Dan left again. Dan stuck with his second choice because he felt he had to. But he regretted it, it shaped everything in his life, your life, Nathan's life, Karen's life and Deb's life. He had to hate you both to survive not being with you. That is the Dan Scott I'm scared of you being. I'm scared that your hate for that baby, stems from the fact that deep down you know that's where you should be. But you've made a commitment." She shook her head and angrily rubbed her face free from tears. "I'm letting you go Luke."

"I don't believe it."

"Enough of what he said tied in to what Karen knew had happened, Deb too, for us all to know he had to be telling the truth. You're scared that you're like him for hating Peyton and the baby for ruining things with us, but that's not what he really felt. Dan never hated you, he pretended to make it easier because he was in too deep with Deb to back away and be with the person he really wanted, first love, the love of his life, your mom." Again his fist flew into the wall but she sensed this time was different.

"How long are we going to do this Brooke? How many ways can I tell you or show how much I love YOU! I thought you got it I thought you understood the Peyton thing but you don't otherwise you wouldn't still be so fucking scared of her. You're walking away from us at the first hint of problem because you're scared."

"I am not Lucas, I know you love me. I know you wouldn't do that to me. What I meant by the Dan thing was about the baby. I am not walking away because I'm scared and in my defence _hint of problem _Lucas another woman is weeks away from having your child I'd say that's a pretty fucking huge problem. I am doing this because it is the right thing to do regardless of the fact that doing it is killing me. We can never have what we dreamt of now, it's all tainted by her and your baby. I can't be selfish, Peyton and the baby need you more than Lauren and I do. It's that simple." He stepped close to her and let his hand rest over her heart.

"Brooke, it is that simple in your head but what does this tell you?" She tore her eyes away from his before slowly stepping away from him.

"I don't know, it's too broken to tell me anything."

"You can push me away Brooke, I know you're hurt and angry with me because I know I screwed up in high school, and by being with Peyton at all, that I created this situation I get it. But what you need to get is that I am in this, us, for keeps. No matter what happens there is no one but you for me. I'll figure something out with Peyton and the baby but it certainly doesn't change anything for me with you and Lauren."

"It does for me. I'm not doing this because of hurt or anger Lucas. Despite everything deep down under all the crap I know her better than anyone else and this is what I know as far as Peyton is concerned you are hers, you were always hers. I took what was hers then, and if I do it again now she'll go to god knows where doing god knows what and your baby will go with her. You might not care right now, but after the shock wears off I know you Lucas, the love in your heart. And I know that your baby will be loved by you regardless of everything else. I won't let you miss out on another child." He slumped into the chair again and hung his head.

"I thought we were past the part where I convinced you what we had was real and for the rest of our lives, and I was so happy. But I meant it when I said I'd wait forever. I will Brooke, one day you'll see I'm the guy for you no matter who else is in the picture. I'll go now, but one day – maybe tomorrow maybe 3 years from now you'll know what I know." With that he left, and she sank deflated to the ground. She was so tired, she was sick of being the strong, mature one who put everyone else's wishes, dreams and what was best for them before herself. Her bones ached and her soul cried out. Yet somewhere deep inside of her gnawed the guilt, that this entire situation could all be traced back to her. The house suddenly felt stifling, a reminder of what she had thought she was leaving behind for her life with Lucas. She trudged the streets of Tree Hill and was surprised where she found herself. Something pulled her to the door and despite voices in her head screaming at her to turn back she knocked.

"I didn't expect to see you here."

"I'm sorry." She watched the slightly uncomfortable shift of the person stood in front of her.

"What for?"

"A lot of things." She watched the indecision flit over the other person's face and she wondered how she'd ended up here.

"You want to come in?" Despite her earlier reservations going inside seemed the most natural thing in the world. Once upon a time this place had been home to her. They both walked through the kitchen and Brooke could faintly smell chocolate chip cookies baking despite knowing full well that hadn't been done in over a decade.

"Your kitchen still smells of cookies." The two shared a smile then which seemed entirely out of place with the state of their current relationship.

"You'd always refuse at first, even when you were so little because you were watching your weight. But in the end you never could resist."

"No one in the world would have been able to resist Anna Sawyer's cookies. I miss her, she was the first person I know that ever smelt like a mom. I miss how she always used to treat me the exact same way she did you because she just knew no one else was really there for me. She was a lot like Karen." The blonde nodded.

"She'd really hate us both now wouldn't she?" Brooke nodded the guilt from earlier resurfaced in her thoughts.

"Peyton I'm condoning you showing up the way you did, or what you did to me in high school. But I need to apologise to you. I called you a terrible friend and treating like a no one for years after, despite saying I'd try and forgive you. Thing is it was my fault too. If I'd have been the good friend I usually was I'd have seen past the fact that he was different to every guy I ever knew and read between the lines when you said you weren't interested. I'd have stayed away knowing that you never really meant it. And I shouldn't have used the promise of friendship as a bargaining tool to get what I wanted." She finally tore her gaze away from the counter to watch the other woman, for a second she saw something, a fleeting look of some emotion that had disappeared before she could name it. Then she saw nothing but stone.

"You should have stayed away you're right. It was the friend code and you broke it first. You knew that I liked him that there was a connection. But you just had to prove that Brooke Davis could get any boy she wanted. You ruined everything Brooke." Brooke was taken aback by Peyton's reaction, truthfully she didn't know why she'd come but stepping inside the door for the first time in years she missed their friendship, ignoring everything that had happened and was happening she missed the way they used to be. But seeing Peyton again and all the events of the past and present hurtling back into her focus she realised that she and Peyton could never go back, that perhaps the treasured memories of what they had once shared were viewed through rose tinted glasses. If she'd been able to accept her part then Peyton should have too. But the blonde had seized onto Brooke's guilt and Brooke knew then that the Peyton she'd loved was not here anymore, if she'd needed any further evidence that was.

"I'm going to go now Peyton, but just know this tonight Lucas begged me to stay with him so when he does come to know remember I'm the one who sent him. We're not in high school anymore the only important in this are my child and yours, and right now your child needs Lucas more than anyone. That's the only reason you'll get him, because I'm making him face up to the mistake he made with you. I honestly thought maybe somehow we'd work something out but what was the point really, the Peyton Sawyer I knew is as dead as the lovely woman who was her mother." With that Brooke marched through the house and out the door. She sighed deeply once outside and cursed herself for going, for saying the things she did when she left. It had been incredibly childish and she knew she'd only said it to hurt Peyton, the child inside her just didn't want Peyton to think she'd won when Lucas went to her. She rubbed her eyes tiredly and glanced down at her watch, she was shocked to see it was nearing midnight, Karen and Keith would be home by now and probably wondering where she was and how she was feeling. Truth be told she didn't want to see them, she didn't want to see anyone. She walked down to the beach and sat in the sand, she ran the grains through her fingers and stared blankly out to the ocean. She could hardly believe what difference 24 hours could make in someone's life.

Finally though she cried, loud heartbreaking sobs of anguish as she let go of her dreams once more. Out there with no one around, no one to hear her she divested herself of her pain the only way she could. When the tears had dried leaving tracks down her cheeks and the air around her was so cold she thought she'd freeze if she didn't move she finally began walking home again. By the time she reached the door it was almost 3am and she knew that Karen and Keith had gone to bed by now. She slipped in the door to her bedroom and laid in the foetal position on the bed, as the light of her phone glowed in the dark and the small object buzzed she reached for it sliding it open to reveal the 36 missed calls and 22 messages she'd received. She opened the call list to find several from the house number she knew would be Karen and Keith, subsequently there were then calls from Lucas who she imagined Karen would have contacted to find her whereabouts upon discovering she was not there. There were calls from Nathan, Haley, Rachel and Mouth. The messages were from those four also, asking her to call them, asking if she was okay. And finally one that made her smile. The last message was from Haley, assuring her that if she needed time then that was fine, Haley understood but that she was there if she needed her. That Lauren could stay at their house for as long as Brooke needed in order to pull herself together. She'd be so lost without Haley and she smiled because she knew that their friendship was not conditional, no boy would tear them apart and in Haley she'd found all the friend she'd thought Peyton had been and so much more.


	25. Something in the Water

Brooke peeked through the closed curtains before opening the door. Her eyes were red and puffy and she'd not slept at all. Haley came barrelling in and pulled Brooke to her in a crushing hug. Brooke couldn't find the words to explain how she was feeling – yesterday she had everything she'd ever wanted. Her life was perfect. Today it was smashed to pieces and she felt broken.

"Where's Luke?" Haley pulled back slightly. Brooke shook her head sadly and slipped from Haley's grasp onto the bed. Haley's eyes went wide with fury. "He left. To be with HER!" The venom in Haley's voice when she said that word. Brooke shook her head again.

"Not yet, but he will be soon. I broke up with him. I told him to go be with Peyton…and their baby." Haley sank down next to her and placed an arm round Brooke's shoulders pulling her close. Brooke tiredly rested her head on Haley's shoulder.

"But honey why? You were celebrating your house last night, your future the three of you."

"I know but now it's gone. Luke says he wants me and that future. But it's different now. It won't work. Peyton only came back to town for Luke, she'll leave if she doesn't get him. She'll take his baby too, there'll be another child of his that he doesn't know. I can't make him stay with me when his place is with her now." Though she felt the tears in her eyes she wouldn't cry.

"But everything he's done he's done for you not her. She doesn't deserve all the things he's achieved and bought you and Lauren." Brooke's shoulders slumped down, she was utterly defeated.

"Haley I can't fight anymore, Peyton lurches from one disaster in life to another. She'd be a terrible mother doing that. That baby needs Luke far more than we do. He'd resent us eventually. I know he would. This is for the best." Haley shook her head vehemently.

"No Brooke you have to fight for him, you can't just let go. This is what you've dreamed of." Brooke laughed.

"I know. On the way back from the party last night on the radio there was this song. I knew Luke would follow me I knew what I had to say and this song just…I don't know what it was but the words. 'I never wanted the stars, never shot for the moon, I like them right where they are, all I wanted was you.'" Brooke drew a ragged breath trying to fight back the tears.

"Don't walk away Brooke. Not for her sake."

"You know this whole thing where she's waiting and pined for him to come back. I bet he has no idea about the fact she ran off to Savannah with Jake for a while. That she proposed. Some love story, the heroine disappears with another guy."

"So tell him, Lucas doesn't want Peyton. We're not in high school anymore there's no messed up love triangle. There are two people who love each other and want to be together and one blonde bitch who just wants to get in the way and you're letting her."

"If he doesn't want her how is she pregnant?" Haley gasped.

"Are you punishing him by walking away? Is this because he slept with her before anything happened with you, once?" Brooke shook her head.

"It's not revenge Haley, it's not prolonging the inevitable."

"And you think them being together is inevitable." Brooke stood up and turned angrily to her best friend hurt that she was so unsupporting of her.

"Yeah I do actually, call me crazy but I've been here before. I fall in love with him really give my heart away thinking he's doing the same thing when all along I'm a filler until Peyton decides she wants him. Which ironically she only ever wants him when she can't have him." Haley stood up and shook Brooke.

"This is fear Brooke, but you're not kids anymore. This isn't some stupid mistake. He didn't choose you because Peyton didn't want him. He chose you because he fell in love with you and he spent weeks trying to show you that. Now the first hurdle you're running away."

"God you sound just like him so I repeat - having a child with someone else is a pretty big hurdle."

"It wasn't planned Brooke. He's devastated."

"How do you know?" Brooke eyed her suspiciously.

"He came by earlier, just as I was coming here, he wanted advice and to see Lauren, he's with Nate now."

"Since when did you become his supporter – you're supposed to be mine!" Haley smiled softly.

"You don't get it. I'm supporting him in doing what he wants, what is best for him because it's what you want and what Lauren wants and it's the best thing for ALL of you." Brooke visibly shook as her fight against tears continued.

"God I started puttng our stuff in that house, I'm going to have to go get it."

"Brooke honey just leave it a few days and see what happens."

"I can't face it today, but trust me Haley tomorrow I'll get our stuff and it'll be done."

* * *

"Hey pretty girl." Brooke spun round to see him. He looked awful. Then again she probably did too. He walked slowly to her and cupped her face in his hand as he wiped the tear she didn't know was there away with his thumb.

"Luke I have to get this done before I need to pick Lauren up." She didn't pull away though. She knew this was the last time she would be alone with him, the last time they'd touch, she wanted to savour it.

"Have you told her what you're doing to us?" She almost fought back that it wasn't all her – it was him too. Him who got Peyton pregnant from some silly one night stand that happened when she was panicking about her daughter turning blue and not breathing properly.

"I haven't yet. I will do soon – but for now she just thinks the house isn't ready." Her voice seemed raspier and thicker than normal and she knew it was unshed tears clogging up her throat.

"Don't tell her, forget it all of it. Just stay." The desperation in his words broke her heart.

"Peyton and your baby need you."

"I don't want Peyton. I never really did you know that, we've covered this. I thought you believed me." She looked up at him through her tears and saw his own. She pulled him into her embrace.

"I do…I know this isn't what we planned. But this is real life Luke, we need to forget the happily ever after and make the best of the hand we're dealt. Your life is with her now. We both know that baby doesn't stand a chance without you." She felt his grip on her grow stronger.

"I can't let you go." I don't want you to. The words screamed in her head but she couldn't open her mouth to say them.

"I'll always love you Luke." She tried to extricate herself from his embrace but he just held her tighter.

"Then why are you leaving me?"

"Loving you isn't enough." She gently pushed him away from her. Her eyes locked on his. "We're just not meant to be." She moved away from him but before she went from the room his hand closed around her arm and pulled her back close to him.

"I'm the guy for you Brooke Davis – one day you'll realise that too. I can wait." If she'd thought the last 17 hours had been bad hearing that broke her heart. She knew he'd be waiting forever. She could never commit herself to him knowing that his child would lose out badly, he'd lose out too.

"Luke it's over. Nothing will change that." Once again she forced herself away from him, it was getting increasingly difficult to do so. If she didn't go now she wondered if she'd ever find the strength to do so. She held her head high as she walked to the door. She opened the red door and stepped onto the porch as she turned to close the door behind her she took one last look at him. He looked as devastated as she felt. He looked up at her as if he felt her gaze on him. He almost smiled at her.

"I'll never be with her Brooke, baby or no baby. I'm going to fight for you." As a tear slipped down her cheek she closed the door. She rested her head back against it resisting the urge to go back inside. She pulled out her cell phone and pressed her speed dial.

"I really need you."

* * *

It had been almost three weeks since the housewarming party from hell, three weeks since Peyton had showed up and as far as Brooke was aware there was still no appearance of the baby. Luke had inundated her with phone calls and messages and e-mails. She'd ignored each and every one. She was simply unable to listen to him and she felt more lost than she had in her life. Eventually she'd have to talk to him, if for no reason other than to make arrangements for him seeing Lauren. Lauren was questioning what was going on and why Lucas hadn't been around and she just didn't know how to answer her. She'd given him her absolute everything, and now it all seemed so broken. For her she just didn't see a way back.

"Hey you." She glanced up, the café unusually quiet to find Haley there.

"What are you doing here?" Haley shrugged and settled herself at the counter.

"I decided to get lunch here today."

"What can I get you?"

"Just some pie. How are you doing?" It was now Brooke's turn to shrug.

"Aside from the permanent nausea, the lack of sleep and therefore bone deep exhaustion, the non-stop crying, I'm okay." Haley reached out to hug her but she backed away, disappearing into the back to get some clean plates. The crash thundered through the café.

"Brooke?" Haley rushed through to the back, there she found Brooke laid unconscious on the floor surrounded by broken crockery and blood. "Oh my god." The waitress had followed Haley and followed her barked order to call an ambulance. It felt like a lifetime that she waited to hear the siren, she tried to rouse Brooke to no avail so settled for gently squeezing her hand. Two paramedics filled the small kitchen area.

"What's her name?"

"Brooke, Brooke Davis she's 23 years old." As one of the EMT's placed a line in the other turned to Haley.

"Can you tell me what happened to her?"

"I, I don't really know, she was fine a few minutes ago she came back to bring the clean plates out front and there was a crash I came back here and found her like this. She's been under a lot of stress though, maybe she tripped or something I don't know." The EMT that had been tending to Brooke turned to the other.

"We need to get her in now, I'm not happy with this amount of blood given that there are no obvious wounds."

"But the broken plates…" Haley interjected. The EMT shook his head.

"I can't see where any of these pieces could have cut her for this amount of blood. We have to get her to hospital – do you work here too?"

"I'm family."

"Are you coming?" Haley nodded and followed them as they rushed Brooke to the ambulance and sped to the hospital. As she was rushed through the doors and doctors pounced on her Haley felt drained as she watched them rush Brooke away from her. She looked down and saw her friend's blood on her clothes and hands. She went to the bathroom to clean up before remembering she was supposed to be back at work, a quick call to the principal before calling Karen and asking her to go to the café, she briefly mentioned Brooke being ill but knowing how bad stress was for her neglected how bad things were. Then she called Deb asking her if she'd be able to collect Lauren from school. Part of her felt she should call Lucas, but he'd only question her as to why Brooke wasn't getting her or calling him herself and Haley wasn't sure if telling him what had happened was wise just yet. So phone calls made Haley was left to sit in the waiting room alone, desperately hoping for some news. It seemed like a lifetime she waited, her head shooting up the second she heard footsteps, but they were never for her.

"Excuse me, did you come in with Miss Davis?" Haley jumped up at the voice and nodded. "And you are?"

"Her sister-in-law and best friend."

"Are there any other family members?" Haley felt like the doctor was questioning where the man who made them sisters-in-law was and she needed an appropriate response.

"Someone had to get her daughter."

"Well Miss Davis had what's known as PV bleed, we've managed to stop the bleed and we'll be running some tests shortly but I can take you to her if you wanted to see her, she's awake now." Haley nodded not caring what exactly a PV bleed was only that it had been stopped. All she wanted was to see for herself that Brooke was okay. She stepped into the room as the doctor told Brooke she'd be back soon to test her.

"You scared me so much." Haley clutched her friend tightly against her.

"I don't know what happened." Before either could say anymore the doctor returned with a portable ultrasound machine.

"Well Miss Davis normally with a PV bleed we could expect problems with either the cervix or the placenta so I just want to do a scan and see how things are doing." She wasn't completely sure she'd heard right.

"Placenta? Well that's not caused it, I can't have a placenta in me I'm not pregnant." The doctor looked up sharply at her.

"Miss Davis we took blood tests earlier you're definitely pregnant. You didn't know." Brooke slowly shook her head.

"I've been going through a lot lately and the stress and tiredness I just thought it was all down to everything."

"Well you're pregnant Miss Davis, now I really want to get a look at what's happening, it might not be good news." Brooke was too stunned to even understand what was happening. She shifted slightly as she felt the cold gel hit her stomach. When she'd received her scans with Lauren the screen had always been positioned so that both she and the person doing the sonogram could see it. This time she couldn't see. Haley squeezed her hand tightly. The doctor made some noises before finally taking the doppler away from her stomach and placing it down. "Well Miss Davis I've got good news and bad news, the good news is that everything seems perfectly fine, the bad news is that means we can't explain why there was a bleed, it may be down to the stress you mentioned so I'd like to keep you in overnight to ensure there is no more bleeding and then I'd like you to have one weeks bed rest. If there's no more bleeding after that then I'd advise only returning to work on light duties. Unfortunately some women do have several PV bleeds in pregnancy with no rhyme or reason to them."

"Okay."

"Would you like to see your baby?" Brooke nodded feeling the entire thing was surreal. The doctor turned the screen so all three occupants of the room were able to see the tiny speck that was her baby. "Miss Davis I would say from this that you're roughly between 8 and 9 weeks gestation. I'll contact your ob-gyn and arrange an appointment for you tomorrow before you're discharged." With that the doctor was gone leaving Brooke and Haley together. Both sat in a stunned silence for a while before Haley spoke.

"I've no idea what the hell is in the water round here but there's pregnancy galore." In any other situation Brooke might have laughed with her, Peyton, Karen, Haley and now she was pregnant. It was certainly very odd.

"To think I was always worried about being like Deb before, now I get pregnant to the same man who got someone else pregnant just a few months ago. Haley what am I going to do?" She couldn't stop the tears from falling down her face. Haley reached over and hugged her tightly.

"It'll be okay Brooke. This isn't the same as with Dan, Karen and Deb. Lucas loves you, you already have one child together and now another on the way. This is the future you both mapped out. He'll be thrilled."

"I can't tell him." Haley recoiled at her words.

"No Brooke, Lauren was different, he was different then the entire situation was different. I'm not lying this time and unless you plan on disappearing from Tree Hill right now he will found out."

"I don't know what words to use. I don't think I can see him, he'll think that it changes things…" Haley cut her off.

"Brooke it does change things. You said that you wanted him to have everything you never gave him with Lauren, well now he can and still be with you. You can still have the future you wanted."

"It's not that easy Haley." Haley stood and walked to the door.

"It is that easy Brooke – you're just making it much more complicated. Call him and get him here, you tell him Brooke or I will this time."

"Haley wait." Haley paused halfway through the door. "I'll tell him – I swear but just wait just a day or so not here wait until I'm home. Will you do that for me? Will you keep Lauren tonight just so I can talk to him properly not here, like this." Haley turned to her friend.

"Sure I can do that Brooke. As long as you mean it when you say you'll tell him."

"I swear."


	26. Bed Rest

She wasn't completely sure if the nausea was pregnancy related or the fact that in the next few minutes Lucas would walk through the door. Since returning home from the hospital Karen had instructed Keith to cater to Brooke's every whim as she was unable to do so herself. Brooke hadn't divulged to Karen, Keith or Lauren why she'd been in hospital or what had been wrong. Karen and Keith knew that she'd collapsed at work, but she offered no explanation. Both seemed to understand that she'd tell them when she was ready. Under strict instructions Lauren had not been to visit her in the hospital, she hadn't wanted her daughter to see her like that, nor did she want her daughter reliving the time she'd spent in that same hospital.

She'd spent two days in a room with no one for company but herself. Haley had stopped by a few times but things had felt awkward between them. The elephant in the room loomed over them. Brooke closed her eyes and pushed herself further back into the mass on pillows keeping her upright on the bed. Haley had told her Lucas now knew of her hospitalisation and had begged to see her. But Haley had been true to her word and told Lucas that Brooke didn't want any visitors until she was discharged, then and only then would she agree to see him. Brooke was actually thankful for the time alone, it gave her chance to consider everything, the way her life was panning out. The baby. She wasn't filled with the same overwhelming sense of panic as when she'd discovered she was pregnant with Lauren. If someone had told 15 year old Brooke Penelope Davis that by the time she hit 24 she'd be a mother twice over, working at a small café barely keeping afloat and without a man by her side that girl would have walked straight past the crazy person who was trying to paint her as some sort of trailer trash. But this Brooke was smart enough to realise that life often took unexpected turns, and while she was facing the prospect of having two children and raising them alone she could console herself with two facts she thoughts were of utmost importance – both her children had the same father, and both children had been conceived in love. Perhaps that second one for Lauren was a stretch, but she knew she'd loved Lucas even if he hadn't loved her back then, and that was enough. This baby however, this baby was the one thing that survived the fallout of Peyton. This baby was what was going to tell the world that despite what had happened since she and Lucas had loved one another fiercely, even if only briefly. She almost laughed aloud at her own thoughts, the idea that their love had just disappeared because a pregnant Peyton had showed up. She still loved Lucas as fiercely as she had a month ago. She couldn't imagine loving anyone but him in her life. She always thought that were she to have another child she'd be married and happy and that the child would be planned and wanted. But life had thrown another curve ball her way. So it came down to the same thing as it did with Lauren. She may not have wanted to pregnant right then, but since she knew she couldn't face the other option it left her with no choice but to have a baby. However there was still the small issue of shortly having no home, and always having no money. But before she worried about that, she had to tell Lucas. The warm summer breeze hit her as the door opened. The worry outlined on his face tore at her heart.

"Brooke, why wouldn't you let me come?"

"I just needed to have a little time by myself." He looked about to argue with her but he seemed to pull himself back. He ventured closer to her and perched on the edge of the bed.

"Mom doesn't seem to have any idea what really happened to you, or why? The girl at the café said she'd never seen so much blood." She ducked her head unable to look at him.

"I'll be fine. I know I haven't really explained things to your mom, but I needed to talk to you first." Finally she willed herself to look at him properly. As her eyes roamed over him she was somewhat surprised at his appearance. He looked almost ill himself and she felt a pang of guilt. This situation was hurting him just as much as it was her. "Lucas the reason I collapsed, the reason there was so much blood was…" His cell phone shrilling cut her off. He glanced at the display before returning his attention to her. "Who is it?" His silence was enough of an answer. "Luke it might be important." He sighed and stood up, turning away from her to answer it.

"I'm with Brooke…Really? Well it won't be straight away will it because this is important…I know that it is, but Brooke has been in hospital and I need to…look Peyton you got this far alone. I'll do my best but I won't just…" Brooke saw the tension in his back and heard him curse under his breath and she guessed Peyton had cut him off.

"What did she want?" He turned back to her and took a seat beside her again.

"It can wait." She arched an eyebrow at him. "She thinks she's in labour. She's going to the hospital."

"Then why are you still here?"

"Brooke, I need to know what happened to you, that you're okay." She placed her hand lightly over his and smiled.

"I'm not going anywhere, I'll still be stuck in this bed when it's all done. You should go." He opened his mouth to protest and then seemed to think better of it. She understood, why bother when he knew she'd refuse to say a word now. He stood and leant forward, it seemed to her almost unthinkingly and habitually he went to kiss her, at the last second his lips changed course and landed softly on her forehead.

"I'll be back soon." As the door closed she let her head fall back into the mountain of pillows supporting her and stared at the ceiling for a moment before picking up her cell. It was a short conversation and once again she was left alone with her thoughts. Though she had been fully aware of the situation for a few weeks, now Peyton was in labour and the baby was soon to arrive everything seemed more real. It was like life had gone from black and white to technicolor and her eyes were unable to become accustomed to the new world around her. She felt the waves of nausea again, but this time she was certain of the cause. The nausea became stronger and she lunged from her bed across the hall and into the bathroom. She'd barely got the seat up before the vomit came hurtling from her mouth. When she was done she rested her warm head against the cool porcelain for a moment or two before her stomach contents once again reappeared. She felt gentle hands pulling her hair from her face and rubbing slow circles on her back. As her stomach settled again she turned away from the bowl and rested her tired body against the cold wall tiles. The concern on the other woman's face made her want to cry.

"She's in labour." Brooke didn't need to offer more words to explain the sudden downturn in her condition. While she suffered feelings of nausea in pregnancy she never really went further than that.

"Oh sweetie." Haley's arms went round her friend and Brooke nestled into them.

"He got the call just as I was about to tell him. I started and then…he wasn't going to go. He said that knowing what had happened to me and that I was going to be okay was more important. But I insisted." Once again Brooke twisted to face the toilet as bile came from her already empty stomach. Haley pulled her hair back once again and continued to rub her back whispering soothing noises to her. And then Brooke knew nothing else.

* * *

She felt her eyes flutter and the light felt too strong.

"Bright." Her mouth felt dry and she had the taste of acidic bile in her throat. Someone moved and the lights were dimmed. She felt a hand holding her own and she forced her eyes open. She found Haley sat at her bedside and Karen, Keith and a doctor hovering in the doorway. "What happened?" Haley smoothed her hair back and for a minute Brooke had a flash of a memory. She was a young girl settling down to sleep and a woman was at her bedside stroking her hair, she felt at peace. Brooke knew it had to be a nanny for it couldn't possibly have been her mother.

"After you'd stopped being sick you passed out. I couldn't move you so I called Keith to come and get you into bed. Karen came too and she called the doctor to see if we should take you to the hospital. He came to check you over instead of going down there again." As Haley finished Brooke saw the other three come closer.

"Miss Davis, I'm very concerned about this pregnancy. I've contacted your ob-gyn and made an emergency appointment for later this afternoon. Mr Scott has said he'll be able to get you there. Now given the admittance to hospital due to the heavy p.v. bleed just a few days ago and the nausea combined with the fainting I really do think it's important that we get you properly checked out. I want you to stay in bed until the appointment and then back to bed as soon as you get home. Under no circumstances should you be leaving this room or be putting yourself under any undue stress." The only thought running through her mind was that now Karen and Keith knew about the pregnancy before Lucas did. As they both bid the doctor farewell Brooke felt the familiar contractions of her stomach.

"Haley…" She began, but Haley was already on her feet and grabbing the trash can, placing it under Brooke's face just in time to catch her latest offering. As she slipped back into the pillows again, exhausted and coated in sweat she smiled weakly at Karen and Keith stood together at the foot of the bed.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I wanted to tell Lucas first but…your grandchild on its way." Karen slipped onto the bed beside Brooke and hugged her tightly. Haley's hand remained firmly holding her own.

"I understand honey. What a mess. How do you feel?"

"Crappy, but I'm guessing you meant about everything. Still crappy applies. After he'd gone it just hit me, it's real. This isn't just some nightmare that I'll wake up from. In a few hours he'll have another child and that child won't be ours. I know he loves me and wants to be with me and not with Peyton. Their child won't change that, but at the same time it does change things. That baby needs him, if he walks away from Peyton she'll take the baby from him I know she will."

"What about your baby? What about Lauren?" Brooke found herself almost unable to breath at the thought. She still hadn't found the courage to tell Lauren about her new sibling, either of them.

"Lauren never really had him. The way I see it is that if he's with Peyton he gets all his children, if he's with me he loses one."

* * *

"Keith honestly I can walk fine."

"Brooke the doctor told me I had to use a wheelchair to get you to the right part of the hospital. Now for goodness sake just sit back and enjoy the ride." Both Haley and Karen had wanted to come with her but she'd refused. She felt pressured by their presence into making a decision regarding all their futures that she just wasn't ready to make. Keith's presence was mandatory as he was her ride, but she felt at ease with him. It felt like unlike Haley and Karen he wasn't judging her for doing the 'wrong' thing.

"Brooke?" The familiar voice snapped her from her thoughts as Lucas approached them. Keith stopped the chair. "What's wrong? Are you bleeding again? Brooke?" She turned her head up to Keith.

"Have we got time for a second?" Keith nodded and disappeared to read some pregnancy pamphlets from the wall nearby. Brooke turned back to Lucas. "You a father again yet?" He looked so upset then. He nodded and she tried not to let the pain show.

"Congratulations Lucas. No matter what else is going on, we all need to remember that your child is completely innocent. Is it a boy or a girl?" He looked up at her then.

"A boy, 7lb 6oz. Brooke what's wrong with you? I'm really worried." She smiled at him.

"Brooke." Keith's voice cut through their moment as he gestured to the clock.

"Luke I have an appointment, it's just a check-up. Go see your son and I'll come find you when I'm done." He hesitated but she motioned for Keith to wheel them on before he could respond, she could feel him watching them as they went.

"Your nephew could probably use you right now Keith, I'll be fine from here."

"Brooke I know everyone has their opinion right now and this whole situation is less than perfect but try to forget everyone else and the mess and just focus on you and this baby and Lauren. She's worried, but she's still young and she'll adapt to whatever happens."

"Thanks Keith." With that he left her and she rolled herself into the ob-gyn's room.

"Hello again Miss Davis. Now the doctor tells me you've had a lot of nausea and you've fainted. You have general fatigue and are just quite unwell. Well the good news is I do have the results from your blood tests we took before you were discharged and so I can tell you right now what's causing you so many problems. You're anaemic, and your blood pressure is a little low. Now once we get you taking some iron supplements your anaemia should get better which hopefully will give you your energy back. Once that's sorted some light exercise and proper eating should help with the dizziness that is causing the fainting. Your blood pressure will need extra monitoring but once you've been on the supplements a few weeks I'm sure we'll see a vast improvement. So on the whole I'd say there's nothing too much to worry about. The supplements won't take effective for a week or so, which I'm sorry to say means bed rest until then. Any questions?" Brooke shook her head. The doctor reached over to shake her hand and left Brooke free to leave. She began to question why she'd told Lucas she'd go find him. Truth be told going near that nursery and seeing his son was the absolute last thing she wanted to do. But he was so worried about her and he needed to know about the baby. At the rate things were going once again he'd be the last to know and she didn't want that. The men heard the chair as she approached and Lucas leapt to his feet to meet her. She managed a smile for him.

"Lucas don't look so worried, I'll be absolutely fine. Some medication and bed rest and I'll be good as new. Luke at work, the blood. It was a p.v. bleed, and the sickness and fainting is just something simple. I'm anaemic with low blood pressure. But I will be okay."

"Brooke I've been so worried about you. What's causing all this? Is it me…the baby?" He hung his head but not before she caught the shame on his face. She reached a hand to him to bring his head up so she was able to look in his eyes.

"None of that Luke, it's simple really. Almost common even – in pregnant women." His face puckered into a frown.

"In pregnant women…you mean you're…" She nodded.

"I'm pregnant Lucas, we're having a baby."

**I know this chapter was quite short and didn't give much mention to Peyton's baby but from Brooke's P.O.V. there's not much to be said on the matter. Next chapter is finally going to be Lucas' P.O.V. on everything**


	27. Hope

**Disclaimer: Song is not mine it's Bon Jovi - I Want You**

In mere weeks his whole world had been thrown completely out of orbit. Life had seemed so perfect before Peyton showed up. The past few weeks being without Brooke and Lauren had been torture. But he knew that he had no one to blame but himself. He'd been reckless that night with Peyton, even when it was happened he knew he didn't really want her. But he'd given in to his loneliness just because she was there. And now nine months later that one moment of stupidity was costing him everything. He'd be lying if he said he couldn't understand why Brooke wanted to end things. It seemed like no matter how hard they tried to escape the foolishness of teenage years Peyton haunted them. But at the same time he truly believed that Peyton being in Tree Hill, Peyton having a baby had no bearing on how he and Brooke felt about one another. Deep in his heart he believed that if he reassured her and bided his time Brooke would come round. He knew she wasn't really ready to give up on their dream.

Peyton had been calling him constantly in the time she'd been in Tree Hill and he rarely answered, leaving him with at least 10 voicemail messages per day. From what he understood she did hold a belief that given the baby they'd have a future. But for him there would never be a chance of that. Brooke was quite simply the one and nothing would change that. He'd been terrified when his mother said Brooke had been rushed to hospital, and only mildly comforted when he'd been told she'd be discharged after a day or so. But he'd also been frustrated that she'd refused to see him, though his mom assured him that the only person Brooke was allowing to visit was Haley. He'd had quite happily strangled Peyton when she called him when he finally, after weeks of not seeing her and two days of worry got to be in the same room as Brooke and Peyton called and ruined it. Brooke ever the selfless one insisted he go to Peyton in her time of need. To see his child being born. But the truth was he didn't want to be there. Though he hated himself for being the man he never wanted to become he was honest enough to admit he did not want this child to exist. And even when he held him for the first time, his son, and looked down into his blue eyes and tiny face he felt no connection. For him there was no rush of love and he detested himself for that. In the logical part of his brain he repeated that it wasn't the boy's fault he'd been born. But right now he just felt nothing for his son. The first time he saw Lauren he'd known instantly she was his child, he'd felt a spark there and it hadn't taken long for him to love her as though he'd been there from the start. But with this boy he just felt an emptiness when he looked at him.

And then Brooke tells him she's pregnant. The joy he felt then knew no bounds, before reality hit and she told him it changed nothing for them. Sometimes she made him so mad, with her insistence that Peyton and her baby needed him more than Brooke and their baby did. With Brooke he had a family, with Peyton there was a child. She just didn't seem to get the difference like he did. Apparently she'd done a good job raising Lauren with his mother, Nate and Hales and would do the same again but his son needed a good father because he wouldn't have a good mother. He hadn't been able to stop himself from angrily asking her whether she realised her selflessness had crossed a line into self-destruction and selfishness. That she was destroying not only their happiness but Lauren's too. He knew she'd not told Lauren yet that their family was no longer going to be living together in the new house and he knew it was because she didn't want to face her reaction. His hand went up to rest on his face where he'd felt the sting of her hand connecting with his face after that. He didn't blame her really, he'd probably been a little cruel. He knew that she was trying to be the good guy, the one who sacrificed what she wanted for the good of other people. But at the same time he also knew that there was some truth to what he'd said. She was blinded to the repercussions of her actions, she was so sure that what she was doing was for the best that she simply refused to acknowledge the hurt she herself would cause by making this choice. He heard the ball hit the back board and was not surprised. His game always went badly when he was brooding.

"You suck ass man." He shook his head.

"Well hello to you too little brother." Nathan had caught the rogue basketball and carried it with him onto the court beside Lucas, as the brunette man drew closer he tossed the ball to Lucas.

"Hales told me the big news." Lucas rolled his eyes. Brooke had actually apologised that Haley knew before she'd told him. He hadn't minded too much – this time the fact three people knew before him was unavoidable given the circumstances.

"Yeah that's Scott baby number 4 all within the same 9 months. I feel like an ass for wishing it was just 3." Lucas gave another attempt at putting the ball through the hoop, he got closer as the ball bounced off the rim and neatly into Nathan's hands. Nathan performed a perfect 3 pointer before running to the hoop to collect the ball. He rested the ball under his arm and looked at his brother.

"No one blames you for feeling that way. You're not Dan, he knew he had a child on the way when he met my mom. And he still loved that child's mother. Though I do have to stay have you never heard of birth control." Lucas had to laugh at that.

"Nate, I'm just that unlucky."

"Only 2% of people got stung by defective rubber and you're both percents." Nathan laughed at his own joke and after rolling his eyes Luke had to smile too. It was incredible to think that he was unlucky enough for it to happen 3 times really if you counted Lauren, but in retrospect 3 of those 2 times were good things really. "Anyway man I came to find you because Hales is worried about you two and has something planned to try and get things moving between the two of you. Especially since it's Hannah's first birthday in a few days and she really wants you guys to have it together by then." Nathan started off away from the court and Lucas followed.

"I can't believe it's been a year since Hannah was born, it's crazy. Is Haley going all out or low-key?"

"She wanted to do a proper blow-out but I convinced her otherwise. With everyone pregnant it's a little too much for a proper blow-out, besides which Hannah's one, she's not even going to remember it. So we're thinking just you guys, Karen and Keith and my mom. That's it. Presents, sandwiches and some cake." The brothers made their way through the streets of Tree Hill towards Nathan's home.

"You remember Lauren's first birthday?" Nathan glanced across at his brother.

"Yeah I remember, it was only a week after we all started college. I'd just started getting my life back on a track after my accident so Brooke decided whatever we did it had to be huge. She got it in her head that she wanted us to go down to Orlando to go to Disneyworld. I thought your mom was going to have a heart attack at the thought of taking a one year old baby there. Haley managed to get her to see sense, that perhaps it was wiser to wait until she was old enough to appreciate it. So in the end we just stayed a little closer to home. We went to Raleigh and took Lauren to 'Playtowers.' It's this giant indoor playground basically. It has this smaller area inside that's just for children under 2 so everything's nice and soft and baby friendly. Then after that we went to the park and had a picnic just your mom, us, Lauren and Brooke. It was a good day Luke." He tried to smile along with Nathan, who clearly enjoyed the memory. But all he could think was how he hadn't been there, and he didn't see that he'd ever have a good enough relationship with Brooke or Peyton to be the father he always thought he'd be. "Luke you'll be there for a lot more than what you missed. And you've two other children you get the firsts of. You and Brooke will work it out, and Peyton will get over it. She doesn't have a choice." As Nathan finished his words he pushed open the door to his home and went directly to the music room, where he knew Haley would be. Lucas followed Nathan and smiled as he saw Haley at the piano with Hannah bashing the keys, a song he was unfamiliar with playing in the background.

"Luke, Nathan found you. Good because I'm performing at Tric in a week and we have a lot of work to do." Lucas scratched his head confused.

"Hales what are you talking about?" She sighed as if annoyed he wasn't on the same page as her.

"Brooke told me a few lines from a song and I found the song. And I'm going to perform it, with you, at Tric."

"Hales you're insane, I can't sing. We know this fact." She shrugged.

"So what? Whether you can sing or not isn't the point. It's a way of getting her to listen to you that actually will strike a chord with her. Are you going to pass that opportunity up for the minor technicality of being unable to sing?"

* * *

"And now I'd like to invite a friend on mine on-stage with me for this next song. Now I apologise in advance to you all – his voice isn't that good. But he wants to do this and I want him to do this, for Brooke. Lucas come on." His palms were sweaty and he felt like he was about to faint under the heat of the lamps lighting the stage. He gripped the microphone he'd been handed so tightly his knuckles went white. He stared into the sea of faces feeling terrified. His eyes found her then, with his brother. Nathan gave him a thumbs up and he noted the bemused smile on her face. "You ready?" Haley whispered to him.

"Not really but I guess it's now or never." She laughed lightly and began to strum on her guitar.

"_The last time I saw her  
Was the night she said goodbye  
She said that love's a stranger  
And it's sure to pass you by  
As she packed up her belongings  
She wouldn't look me in the eye  
But I could see a tear roll  
Off her face  
As we both tried so hard  
Not to cry she said_

_I never wanted the stars  
I never shot for the moon  
I like them right where they are  
All I wanted was you  
So baby just turn away  
Because I can't face the truth  
All I'm trying to say  
Is all I wanted was you_

_I tried so hard to remember  
Where when how why love went away  
I tried to drown myself in pity  
But your memory kept calling your name_

_I bought you fancy cars and diamond rings  
All the things that money brings  
And the servants to paint the sky blue  
And I worked so hard seven days a week  
And built a fortress for your heart to keep  
If I could I'd wrap these words up for you_

_I never wanted the stars  
I never shot for the moon  
I like them right where they are  
All I wanted was you  
So baby just turn away  
Because I can't face the truth  
All I'm trying to say  
Is all I wanted was you  
_

_I want you, I want you_

_Baby I want you,_

_  
But never thought you were alone  
I filled the party up with company  
But never made our house a home  
_

_All I got is my guitar these chords and the truth  
All I got is my guitar ... but all I want is you_

_Baby all I want…_

_I never wanted the stars  
I never shot for the moon  
I like them right where they are  
All I wanted was you  
So baby just turn away  
Because I can't face the truth  
All I'm trying to say  
Is all I wanted was you_

_I want you, I want you,_

_Baby I want you,_

_I want you, I want you,_

_Baby I want you,_

_I want you, I want you,_

_Baby I want you"_

The crowd went insane and he lost sight of her in the mass of bodies. He jumped down from the stage leaving Haley thanking the crowd for their rapturous applause.

"That was the song on the radio as I drove home the night Peyton showed up, the one I told Haley the chorus to." He turned at the sound of her voice. She looked so stunning dressed in just jeans and an oversized white shirt with a loose black belt around her middle. The thought that it wouldn't be long until their baby was extending her abdomen caused a smile.

"Yeah, she told me about the words and I found the song. But the rest was her idea I can't really take the credit, or blame depending on how you feel." She laughed and he relaxed slightly. Brooke was unpredictable at the best of times and he'd been concerned that she'd get angry with him for such a public display.

"It's crazy in here, you want to go for a walk on the beach?" All he could do was nod, she took his hand and led him out the club. Once outside he expected her to drop his hand but she didn't. They stayed silent until they reached the beach. As they stepped into the sand she removed her shoes to walk barefoot over the grains with the water lapping at her feet. She looked more at peace than he'd seen her in over a month so followed suit, emboldened he took her hand once more as they began a leisurely stroll.

"How's the nausea and the tiredness now?"

"The tiredness is much better now, but the nausea is still pretty bad. Luke it amazes me that sometimes there's a song you've never heard but once you do it becomes a mantra for your life. Like it's telling your story. 'I never wanted the stars, never shot for the moon, I like them right where they are, all I wanted was you.' All I want is you might be more accurate."

"All I want is you too Brooke, the dream we had for us in that house, it's here. You and Lauren and me and now our baby."

"I never saw a step-child in the picture, one merely months older than our own child. Lucas if it was just us and our baby and Lauren I'd be over the moon. But you have a son, with Peyton. I know you didn't do anything wrong by being with her, and I know you love me and not her. But it's not that black and white. I think we just need to figure things out and not make rash decision."

"Rash decision like ending things?" She shook her head.

"Luke, surely you're able to understand why I did that."

"Maybe I can, but for where I was standing it felt very much like running away. I'm not saying we'd be able to find our way through things Brooke, I know this was messed up. I just needed you to want to try. And now you're pregnant and we're going to have a baby. It just feels crazy that we can't make this work, despite Peyton…and Jake." Brooke's eyebrows almost shot off the top of her head.

"You named him Jake?" He looked down at the sand and moved it around with his feet.

"She asked me for my thoughts on names and I said I didn't care. She could choose. I think when she said Jake she was hoping for a reaction, I know there was something between them at some point so…"

"You can't be okay with that." He shrugged.

"Jake's a good guy, not a terrible namesake." Truthfully the idea of calling his child after the mother's previous lover was beyond bizarre. But given the circumstances surrounding him at the current moment it was just one bizarre thing in a sea of them. He wanted to care more. His brain kept telling his heart that this was his son and he should care what his name was, but while he'd visited everyday he still felt no connection to his son. A fact which was becoming more and more upsetting to him given his relationship with his father.

"Lucas Scott, I know you. I know that right now you're worried because you can't bring yourself to care about that baby. But I know this too, loving your son is not betraying me, or Lauren. It's hard for me, this thing but I would never hold it against you if you loved your child. At some point you will need to let go of the hate you have Peyton and the feeling that they both ruined your life and let the boy into your heart. Lucas it kills me to say this, but he's your son and he deserves to be loved by you. It hurts me that he's here but he's not going away either and we all need to deal with that."

"All I need is hope Brooke."

"I love you Lucas, let's just take it one day at a time."


	28. Accept The Things You Can't Change

The snuffles coming from the bassinet in the corner of the room reminded Lucas exactly why he kept coming here. Peyton came back into the room and handed him the glass of lemonade. Spring had become summer without him even realising and the air was stiflingly warm. He gladly accepted the cool drink and knocked the entire glass back in one big gulp. The refreshing feel of the ice cold drink sliding down his throat lasted for only seconds. He checked his watch and saw he was due at his brother's in just fifteen minutes for his niece's first birthday party. He should have left half an hour ago but Peyton had begged him to stay, assured him that the baby would be waking any minute now, and that she had something important to discuss with him.

"Peyton clearly he's not going to wake up soon and I have to get to Hannah's party, they know where I am and…" he trailed off not knowing how to say that he didn't want any of them, particularly Brooke, to get the wrong impression. He started to get up and she jumped to her feet.

"We could always come with you, I mean Hannah is his cousin, Nathan and Haley are his aunt and uncle. He really should be there, it's his family. He's not met his grandma yet." The thought of showing up with Peyton and the baby turned his stomach. He knew it would destroy Brooke to watch them walk in, as though they were a family. His mother was a fair individual, she always had been. Sooner or later he knew she'd come and see her new grandchild. But she loved Brooke as though she were a daughter and the entire situation had devastated, throw in the hormones and her own stressful pregnancy and he knew Peyton was not a person his mother had any desire to see. Haley was much the same as his mother. Hannah's first birthday was supposed to be a happy event, even more so when you considered how difficult her first few weeks of life were. The last thing anyone wanted was Peyton showing up, her presence would ruin the entire thing.

"Peyton the baby is asleep and I need to go now. Plus emotions are still a little raw right now, it's not wise to antagonise pregnant women." He thought for a minute she'd argue with him so was pleasantly surprised when she didn't. He made towards the door and then her voice stopped him.

"No Lucas, I still need to talk to you." He was about to tell her it would have to wait until another time until she said, "I have a confession to make." He'd be lying if he wasn't hoping now would be the moment she told him this entire mess was just a lie. He eased himself back down and she followed suit, smiling at him. "Lucas I realise that things are a little difficult and this was a shock for you. But the lack of any real feeling for your son is not right, and my confession is this – I never really registered him as being called Jake. I registered him as Jonathon. I only told you I called him Jake to get some kind of reaction from you, behold my success. Lucas Jonathon is your son and he isn't going anywhere. It's not fair or right that you treat him so differently to Lauren. Might I remind you that when you found out about her you loved her almost from the start, despite hating Brooke at the time." Her words stung him, but that was simply because they were true.

"I know Peyton, I need to try harder I understand that. But you need to understand that my life here was shaping up to be great before you came back here and blew it all to hell. That's not something that's easy for me to deal with and I still have no idea if I'll ever get back what I had with Brooke. I don't know what you want from me Peyton. I show up here to see him every single day, which right now is more than I see Lauren, I feel like the worst the guy in the world for not feeling anything for him. I hate myself for feeling like that about my son. But I don't know how to change how I feel."

"What I want Lucas is for you to stop wishing him away. I want you to tell Lauren about her brother. I want her to come meet him." He stood then and began to pace.

"When Brooke and I decide to tell Lauren it will be her choice to come and meet him. But Brooke and I are Lauren's parents and it's our decision not yours. We have a lot of things we have to discuss with her, more important things than…"

"Your son?" Once again he felt worse than pond life for the way he was behaving. He stopped his pacing and turned to Peyton.

"She's had a rough year Peyton and she was finally getting what she wished for. Now that's pretty much shot to hell and she doesn't even know it yet…and Brooke's pregnant, which she also doesn't know."

"She's pregnant?" Lucas nodded. For a second he almost pitied Peyton for the look she wore. He wasn't a complete moron, he knew that Peyton was hoping that with the end of him and Brooke and the birth of Jonathon that there was a future for them. It couldn't sit well knowing Brooke was pregnant. "You should probably go to Hannah's party." The good guy in him told him to stay and ensure she was okay. But he couldn't bring himself to do it, he just wanted to be back with his family. He opened the door, pausing before he left.

"I'll come see Jonathon tomorrow." With that he was gone. Leaving that house felt very much like a black cloud had been removed from over his head.

* * *

He felt the atmosphere as soon as he stepped through the door, he saw the looks Brooke and Haley tossed between one another. But more importantly he saw his daughter. It felt like years since he'd seen her.

"Daddy you're here!" She hurled herself into his already open and waiting arms.

"How's my princess?" He twisted her to settle on his side and she wrapped her legs round his waist and arms round his neck as he carried her back into the room.

"I missed you daddy. When are we going to live together? Momma said there was a problem and it had to be fixed first. How long will it be?" Lucas felt completely on the spot. The Scott family adults glanced at one another, all as unsure how to respond to Lauren's question as the other.

"I'm not sure honey, now where's your cousin, the birthday girl." As he softly placed Lauren back on her own feet he turned to take his niece from her father's arms, missing the disappointed look of his own daughter. He pressed a kiss to Hannah's forehead and followed Nathan into the kitchen.

"Man I'm glad you're here. Three pregnant females, my mom and the parents and babies from the group she takes Hannah too is all a little overwhelming." Nathan peeked round the corner into the living area. "Keith looks like he's dying there in a sea of oestrogen." Lucas laughed.

"They can't be that bad." Nathan threw him a look.

"Yeah well they've chilled out now you're here. What the hell were you thinking being late from Peyton's with those three psychos in there?"

"She actually suggested they both come." Nathan cocked his head seemingly unsure he'd heard right. "Yeah I know. Crazy! Then she goes on to inform me that when she told me a week ago she'd called my son Jake, she was only aiming for a reaction. She actually named him Jonathon." Hannah was happily pulling on the chain Lucas had round his neck so blissfully unaware of the conversation and happenings around her.

"Luke weren't you the least bit pissed considering her history with Jake that she apparently named your son Jake?" Lucas exhaled a loud breath of air. He shrugged.

"Nate I want to feel about him like I do about Lauren but I just don't. I hold him and I look at him and I think cute baby…but that's it. You know how when you're sat in a room with woman cooing over a baby and it gets passed to you somehow, you hold it like it's a bomb and you glance at it and think cute or ugly, then you pass it on. Whereas with your own kid, or in my case with your daughter," he said glancing down at Hannah drooling on his shirt, "you hold them close because you feel something. When I hug Lauren I never wanna let go, because I feel like if I do one day something will come along that I won't be able to protect her from. But with Jonathon I'm ready to pass him on. I keep going there and hoping that today will be the day I feel something for him but it doesn't happen. And each time I leave feeling the same as when I got there I hate myself a little more." Nathan hit his older brother on the back in sympathy.

"You just have to keep at it. You'll get there, maybe take him away for an hour or so, so Peyton isn't around. You might find it easier." Lucas nodded, Nathan was right. Without Peyton there he might find things easier.

"She wants me to tell Lauren, thinks it's time his family accepted him. She has a point I guess, but I figure it's a lot to ask of them when I haven't got past his origins yet myself." Lauren pranced into the kitchen. At age six she wanted nothing more than to be a ballerina. She was begging them both for lessons for her birthday.

"Momma and Aunt Haley said you better not be drinking in here, and that it's time for Hannah to come open her presents." Nathan rolled his eyes at his brother before following his niece back into the living room. Lucas followed suit and bent to pass Hannah to Haley, who was sat Indian style on the floor surrounded by presents. He kissed her on the cheek by way of greeting and managed to settle on the sofa next to Brooke. Lauren immediately launched herself into his lap, wiggling like a puppy until she was comfortable. He felt an urge to place an around Brooke's shoulders to bring her closer to him but resisted due to the unhappy look she shot him.

"OK you can start now." Keith announced pointing the video camera at Haley and Hannah. It wasn't long before Hannah lost interest in the opening of presents leaving her mother to do it for her and became obsessed with climbing in and out of the box her trike had come in. Nathan was currently cursing under his breath in the corner trying to assemble said trike. As Lauren slipped from his knee to try to coax Hannah back to opening presents with Haley Lucas decided to give aid to his brother. Between the two of them they managed to assemble it just as his mom brought out the Winnie the Pooh cake she'd made, the candles flickering in the breeze from the patio doors. A chorus of Happy Birthday sounded and Haley encouraged Lauren to help her baby cousin blow out the candles. They all cheered and for the first time Hannah reached out to go to her cousin. Haley set her daughter on wobbly legs and she waddled forward to wrap her arms around Lauren in a baby hug. It warmed his heart to see them and he was happily anticipating when it was his two children doing such an adorable thing, though he was quick to remind himself that there was another child that would be related to them who was unlikely to receive the same treatment. And he was as guilty of that as everyone else was.

* * *

Lucas was thrilled that by the time they were bidding farewell to the birthday girl and her parents Brooke had thawed enough to agree to Lucas walking his two girls home. Lauren skipped on slightly ahead, ecstatic that after weeks her parents were actually spending time together again.

"Brooke about today…" She held up a hand to stop him.

"Don't Luke, you don't have to explain."

"I want to. He was asleep the whole time. Peyton keep asking for five more minutes so I'd see him awake but I finally said I had to go and she told me she had a confession. She named him Jonathon, she told me she called him Jake to get a reaction."

"Oh, that's better right?"

"I guess, I mean yes it is better. Obviously it is. No one really wants their child named after a guy the kid's mother was close to. Regardless of how you feel about the mother. Brooke when Lauren asked today when the house would be ready – are we telling her when it will be, or that it won't be at all?" he saw her slowly lick her lips from the corner of his eye and his hands began to sweat he was so terrified of her answer.

"Lucas say we go ahead with our dream, your son is going to visit our home. If I don't get past how I feel right now, and be honest here, is it going to make building a relationship with him any easier? Or will it make something that you're already finding difficult even harder?"

"Harder I guess, I would hate knowing that him being there was hurting you." She sighed and nodded. He knew that she'd known his answer before he spoke it. She gestured to her head as she began to speak.

"In here Luke I know that he is innocent in this mess," then her hand came to rest on her chest, "but in here I still feel resentful towards him. I can't give you an answer to our future until I know if I can past it. If I can then it'll take hard work but we'll do what we can, if I realise that I can't then even though you're right about the pain I'm inflicting on us all I have to walk away because it is not fair for him to walk into a house to see his father and deal with the sort of feelings I have. I know you think I'm being selfish but…" He shook his head.

"I know I said that Brooke, but the way you finally explained yourself just now I get it. No matter what house Lauren and our baby walk into they'll know they're loved. Jonathon isn't having the best start where his family is concerned. Lauren and the baby will always have more connection to their family than he will just because you're as much a Scott at this point as I am. I just wish I could erase all the pain, present and future."

"I know you do Luke. You're a good man, and a great father and in my heart I know you have the potential to be a good father to all three of your children. I don't know how it will all work out, but of that I'm sure." And she took his hand and they walked in silence to her door, just like when he walked her home from the café – small steps.

* * *

"Hey Luke, nice night isn't it?" Lucas paused and grabbed the ball he had been dribbling.

"Yeah I guess it is."

"So how you doing son?" Lucas passed the ball to Keith who tossed it through the net. Just over a year ago Keith was all Lucas had really had. The two had been so close, yet one visit seemed to have changed all that, in such a short space of time Lucas had gained his mother and friends back, a daughter and Brooke, only to lose her again or so it seemed but gained two more children. Keith had gained a wife and a child. When things had been difficult when Lucas had returned to Tree Hill he'd relied heavily on the close relationship he had with Keith, but since Keith's marriage and his mother's pregnancy along with his and Brooke's relationship the close relationship he'd once loved so much had gone by the way side somewhat. But Keith randomly showing up at the river court, where Lucas knew Keith knew he'd be, touched him. It showed him that despite their relationship becoming more distant from the outside truthfully they were still as close as they'd always been. Lucas surmised that was what a father/son relationship was. That eventually you grew up and got your own life, but when the cards were down and you needed someone that hero of yours would still be there.

"Just trying to figure out my next move, there has got to be something I can do to convince Brooke." Keith scratched his head and pulled a face at Lucas, who stared at him quizzically. "What?" Keith tossed the basketball back to Lucas.

"Luke from what I know and what she's said I think your best move is to give Brooke some space to figure it out for herself. I know you love her, she knows you love her. But that's irrelevant really now. It's not about whether you love each other, it's about whether she can handle having Jonathon in her life, which if the two of you build a future together she will. Maybe, considering how often you tell us all you're still not building a relationship with him, you should put as much energy into things with Jonathon as you are doing with Brooke."

"I have to fix things with her." He couldn't understand how Keith of all people was so dismissive of how important Brooke was.

"Luke, people who are meant to be together always find each other in the end. But you mess up with a young child and it's almost impossible to ever fix things. You create a barrier and crossing it just gets harder and harder until you reach a point where you couldn't fix things even if you tried. Just ask Dan."

"I know I can fix things with Brooke, I don't know I can have a good relationship with Jonathon. It's easier to focus on Brooke."

"Luke maybe you should try getting away from Peyton when you see him. Her presence isn't going to make things any easier for you now is it? Before you know it he's going to be Lauren's age. He's going to be able to go camping with you and throw a ball around, do you want to have a relationship with him like you did with Dan or like we had? At the end of the day Luke right now you're punishing him for the mistake YOU made." Keith was right, unsurprisingly. And for the first time Lucas believed what Brooke had told him about Dan. Dan believed he'd made a mistake leaving Karen and being with Deb, so he rode Nathan hard because it was his fault he'd stayed with Deb, and ignored Lucas because it was his fault that Karen and Dan's future had been altered in the first place. He was blaming Jonathon for the situation he found himself in, but the fact of the matter was he'd known sleeping with Peyton was a mistake when it was happening. Jonathon didn't ask to be born, and if he had he certainly wouldn't have wanted to be born into this mess. Maybe if he could forgive Jonathon for being born, Brooke would do the same. Well perhaps forgive wasn't the right word where Brooke was concerned, but he knew she was a good person. He just had to trust in her and hope against hope that she'd realise that their love was strong enough to get through this.


	29. Harsh Dose of Reality

Brooke expertly flipped the pancake in the pan to the applause of her daughter. She smiled to herself as she remembered the girl she was before Lauren, before living with Karen. The girl who couldn't even make toast. She'd never be a chef, nor even a particularly good cook but she'd learned a few things from Karen over the years, enough to feed her child. Particularly when that child was requesting pancakes, insisting that since it was her birthday tomorrow and she'd be far too busy would Brooke make pancakes for dinner tonight. For everything she and Lucas were putting their girl through the last thing she'd dream of doing was refuse to make pancakes for the almost birthday girl. For such a tiny girl Lauren could pack away such a huge stack it made Brooke's mind boggle. As she cleaned up the remnants of their evening meal Lauren coloured happily at the table, chatting away to Brooke, though she didn't hear much of what her daughter said she was so lost in her thoughts. She hadn't yet told Lauren about the letter she'd received yesterday. The hospital had written to her informing her that they wanted Lauren to go in for a check on her heart the day after her birthday. She couldn't bring herself to put a dampener on Lauren's birthday by telling her what would be awaiting her the following morning. She'd called Lucas immediately and he'd agreed it was best not to ruin her birthday. Deep inside she knew Lauren was better now and the check up was really just a formality but the dread was still lingering.

"Hey fat ass!"

"Slut." The word was out of her mouth before she even turned round, though it was unnecessary to do so. She only knew one person in the world who'd walk into her home and give that greeting. She switched off the stove and put the pan down screaming as she opened her arms wide for a hug. The redhead obliged and then she stepped back giving Lauren chance to launch herself into the waiting arms.

"Aunt Rachel!" Brooke smiled to herself, she never thought she'd see the day when Rachel Gatina would be 'Aunt Rachel' to anybody.

"Rach I didn't think you and Mouth were getting here until tomorrow."

"Well whore I decided that tomorrow is Lauren's day and tonight should be our night. We are going out and drinking far more than is good for us. Mouth is joining me tomorrow."

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"And why not? From what I remember things here are not good and we need to have some fun. I mean sure Haley can't really party with us but we'll survive."

"How about I call Hales and we have a girls night here?"

"Don't be such a killjoy!" Brooke sighed.

"Lauren honey it's time you went and started getting ready for bed now. Go pick out a story you want and get your pjs on." As soon as Lauren was out of earshot Brooke turned her attention back to Rachel.

"Look girls night in is really the only thing I can do – I haven't told Lauren this yet so keep the reaction down but…I'm pregnant." The laughter that erupted from Rachel seemed to last an absolute eternity. When it finally subsided leaving the redhead wiping tears from her eyes Brooke waited for the words.

"You have to be kidding me. What is wrong with this town? Oh my god, drama, drama, drama. Why would you do that after the Peyton mess?"

"It happened before the Peyton mess actually. I'm just a little over 15 weeks. But like I said, with things as undecided as they are we haven't told Lauren yet. So please don't. I'm going to let you wrap your head around this, call Haley tell her to come over while I get Lauren to bed.

* * *

Brooke shifted in the chair and moved so she could reach a hand to the bowl of popcorn resting on the sofa beside Haley, who was sprawled across it. Rachel was draped across the other sofa, the only one who currently had a glass of wine in hand. Brooke shook her head at the thought of just how sensitive Rachel could be, she herself would kill for a glass of chilled white just about now.

"So when I called you fat ass I obviously got it spot on."

"I bet you said that before she told you." Brooke laughed at Haley's comment, Rachel certainly was predictable.

"Hey girls, gosh I just suddenly got a flash of what it would have been like in my house if Lucas had been a girl." Karen perched on the arm of the sofa on which Haley was laid.

"If Lucas had been a girl there'd be a lot less children in Tree Hill right now." Karen batted a hand out at Rachel's head.

"Very funny. When are you and Mouth starting a family?" Brooke laughed as Rachel began to choke on her mouthful of popcorn at the idea of settling down to family life.

"You know what I don't get, I mean between you there's what 2 and a half months, 12 weeks something like that and yet Karen you're huge, there's only a couple of weeks between you and Haley right and it's just crazy the size difference. Look at where you'll be soon Haley. And then you Brooke, and all the while I'll still be this hot!"

"Actually I'm bigger this time around than I was with Lucas, I've been looking at pictures. I think it may be an age thing, I must be retaining a lot more water than I did with Lucas."

"Well thanks Karen, if I was ever planning on having kids you've successfully grossed me out of the idea."

"The rest of mankind thanks you Kar." Brooke, Haley and Karen sniggered while Rachel scowled at them. Rachel huffed as she went into the kitchen.

"Well girls it's about time for me to get some sleep so I'll say goodnight. Try keeping her in check." Karen smiled at them both before leaving them. Seconds later Rachel appeared with a now replenished glass of wine, she expertly manoeuvred herself so both Brooke and Haley had the glass waved temptingly under their noses before folding herself up in the corner of the sofa.

"Has she gone to the bathroom again?" The disbelief in Rachel's voice caused the other two to laugh.

"No she's gone to bed." Rachel grinned.

"Good, now onto the good questions. So how'd the fat, blonde whore take the news that you're pregnant?" Brooke shrugged.

"I don't know whether Lucas ahs actually told her or not." The stunned expression on Rachel's face said it all.

"How do you not know? And why wouldn't he have told her?"

"Well Lucas and I have only really talked about Lauren's birthday recently. I think he's finally got the message that with regards to us, and to the baby, and even Peyton and Jonathon I just need some time and space. And he might not have told her simply because things are tense enough as it is."

"Well that's no fun!" Brooke and Haley shared a sly grin at Rachel's pouting. "Well at least tell me how she reacted to Luke asking for a paternity test, I mean obviously we all know the results but she must have been a little pissed." Brooke frowned and glanced over to Haley. This time Rachel didn't miss their shared look. "He has had a paternity test done, right?"

"Look Rach, Peyton is a lot of things but I knew her a long time before all this crap, before Lucas. If there was a doubt in her mind then she would have said something, to do what she's doing if there was a chance of it not being Luke's baby is just too evil even for her. Besides she's not you, she wouldn't just sleep with any old guy. Besides which for the timeline to fit she'd have had to get pregnant by sleeping with someone else as soon as she left Tree Hill more or less and the way she feels about Lucas I think that's pretty unlikely." Rachel snorted.

"Yeah you're right I mean she's never claimed undying unmoving love for Lucas Scott and then as soon as he's not around jumped into being with someone else has she? Oh wait there was that guy – Jake I think his name was." Rachel's voice dripped sarcasm and Brooke for a minute began to second guess herself. As much as she hated Peyton she did sometimes have a tendency to remember the girl who'd been her best friend, and ignore the changes that had occurred over the years.

"I know Peyton got hooked up with Jake pretty soon, but hooking up with someone is one thing, getting pregnant and then not mentioning his existence is another thing Rachel. Brooke's right I don't think Peyton is that evil." Rachel glanced up at Haley as she spoke, she took a long sip of her wine and lowered the glass, appearing to really think about what her response would be.

"If that's what you want to believe then fine, but I think you're being naïve."

"That's all you're going to say." Rachel shrugged.

"Yeah, I'll save the rest for the day I get to say I told you so."

* * *

The screech woke the entire house, Brooke, Haley and Rachel had somehow managed to squeeze themselves all into Brooke's queen size bed.

"It's my birthday!" Lauren dived on top of the three women, screaming once again that it was her birthday.

"Urgh! It's also a Sunday, and this is way too early to be awake." Brooke laughed at Rachel, she never had been a morning person. Brooke and Haley had adjusted to it, all part of being a mother she guessed. Brooke and Haley both sat up while Rachel pulled a pillow over her head and rolled onto her stomach.

"Does it feel any different now you're six?" Lauren continued her bouncing while she responded.

"Yes auntie Haley it feels lots different. I'm a big girl now. When's daddy coming? Will we be living with him by my next birthday mommy? Or even better by Christmas?" bouncing away on the bed Lauren missed the looks exchanged between Brooke and Haley. In truth Brooke didn't know if they'd ever be living with Lucas. Haley loved Brooke but both knew her feelings on the matter. And Haley steadfastly refused to listen to what Brooke tried to tell her. Haley just informed her that she was hiding and that both she and Nathan were about ready to smack some sense into her. For Brooke though the only thing she was certain of was the fact that sooner or later she had to make a decision, for all their sakes particularly the new baby. And whatever decision she made had to be for good this time. Shaking away the depressing thoughts she smiled at her daughter.

"Your daddy should be…" She trailed off as the door directly into their bedroom opened revealing Lucas. The expression on his face was comical.

"Hi I thought you'd be up by now and…not in bed with two other women."

"Hey buddy."

"Hales…what are you doing in bed with Brooke and what I assume must be Rachel under that pillow?"

"Auntie Rachel came early for my birthday and they was up real late daddy…" Her voice dropped down to a whisper. "They was drinking naughty stuff. Except for Auntie Haley, she can't drink the naughty stuff cos she's having the baby." Lucas raised his eyebrows questioningly in Brooke's direction. She gave a slight shake of her head, though she was tempted to march over there and slap him for considering she too would have drunk with Rachel. He grinned and reached over to lift Lauren from the bed.

"Were they really princess? Well it's a good thing you were here to keep them in line. How about we let these ugly sisters get themselves ready for the day while I take my little Cinderella here to make breakfast for everyone." Lauren clasped her hands tightly and Luke's neck and the two disappeared into the house. As soon as the door shut the pillow was hurled across the room leaving Brooke face to face with a grumpy Rachel.

"What the hell Davis?" Brooke stared wide eyed at her incredibly unpredictable friend. "I mean honestly I don't know why you don't get yourself looking fabulous and march yourself over to that bitch's house and tell her straight that Lucas is yours, you're the one he's building a family with and she needs to get over herself because in a few months time there'll be a new baby Scott. Who will most likely be a million times cuter than her brat!" While Haley tried to smother her laughter Brooke looked like she could kill Rachel.

"Rach you have no idea what you're talking about. It's more complicated than…" Rachel jumped up and cut Brooke off and she began to rummage through her bag for some clothes.

"Complicated? Yeah right you've been in love with the guy for what 7 years? You have a beautiful little girl together and a baby on the way. He didn't cheat on you. He realised he loved you and fought damn hard to prove it. You were all ready to shack up together until that blonde cow showed her peroxide roots round here. He has not done a single thing wrong Brooke and you're punishing him regardless. Just think of what is going on in that kitchen right now – father and daughter making breakfast for you so you get to have a leisurely primping session with your two best friends. He'd walk over hot freaking coals for you if you asked and all you're doing is pushing him away. It might not be soon Brooke Davis but eventually he will walk away from you. I don't get you, if you find a guy like that who loves you hold on damn tight so you don't lose him, you don't push and push and push until eventually he snaps. Right Haley?" Haley nodded meekly not wanting to making Brooke explode, which at this point seemed fairly likely if the throbbing vein in her head was anything to go by. During her tirade Rachel had managed to empty the entire contents on her bag round the room in order to seek out her shower things. Brooke stood and walked the short distance across the bed so she was towered over the redhead. She looked about ready to beat her down but for her part Rachel stood her ground. It had been like this since the two met, Haley had many a time wondered how they ended up such good friends. Rachel transferred to Tree Hill when Brooke was giving up all her extracurricular activities after having Lauren, and Rachel took each and every spot that ever meant anything to Brooke. They bickered non-stop until one day it just ended, well not ended. The bickering went from bitchy to friendly and they became so close. There was still always fireworks between the two, but Haley didn't mind so much. It was just the way they were with each other and she'd become used to it. While she herself tried reasoning with whichever one of them was having drama at the time Brooke and Rachel took the same approach – a verbal battering with no holds barred nothing but the truth, which is exactly what Rachel had just dished out. Sometimes it worked, sometimes Haley's approach worked, sometimes it was a combination of them both. That's probably why the three worked so well together.

"And what about the 'brat' of Peyton's? That is Luke's son you know and regardless of him not cheating on me all of a sudden there's this baby here and it has screwed everything up. Yes I love Lucas, and no I don't ever see there being anyone who will ever come close to him." As she spoke Haley could see the anger slowly ebbing from her as she sank closer to a sitting position. "And yes you're right it should be as simple as we love each other. But it just isn't. Maybe I am giving up too easily, maybe I should go round and brawl it out with Peyton, until there's only one of us left standing. But no matter what happens, no matter what I do Jonathon exists and until I can wrap my head around that I don't see there's any point pretending." Brooke was now sat on the end of the bed and Haley scrambled over to sit beside her, Rachel sitting the other side. Haley rubbed slow, soothing circles on her back.

"Tigger you told Luke that he had to stop over thinking how he felt about Jonathon and just try and be a father. So maybe that's what you need to do. Just try and see how things could work out, give it a shot and maybe the feelings will sort themselves out."

"And if they don't? I'll just be setting Lauren up to hurt her."

"You already have Brooke, Haley has told me and you have how much she talks about the fact that you're supposed to all be living together. It stopped being a dream months ago. She's already going to be hurt even if you walk away now without giving it a shot."

* * *

Brooke pulled herself up raising the pitcher of lemonade higher as a crowd of children rushed past. She stepped inside the kitchen to find Lucas tidying up.

"All in all I'd say the party was a success, just a few more little monsters to go and then it's done for another year." Lucas turned to face her as she talked and leaned back against the worktop.

"You know this party is almost exactly the same as the one you threw last year – except I won't be going out to get wasted after. I was so miserable last year Brooke. My mom and I had only just started speaking, Keith was still in Charlotte, you and I pretty much hated each other, Hales and Nate hated me too. I know things are still a mess with Peyton, and I've been trying to stick to Keith's advice to let things be until you're ready but I just want to say this. I'm a million times happier than I was this time last year. It feels like I've always been around for Lauren, like this is what a father daughter relationship should be like, my friends and family and I are all close again, in fact I'd say Nathan and I are more like brothers than we've ever been. But most importantly I realised how much I love you. Even if you're not ready, even if you'll never be ready you're my everything Brooke Davis and you complete me." She didn't know if it was his words, her hormones or both but she felt herself crying. His arms were around her before she even realised it and for the first time in months instead of fighting it, protesting things were too hard right now – she let him love her. It wasn't the end or the answer, it was just now this moment. They were a man and a woman and they loved each other. For now it was that simple.


	30. Unexpected

Brooke was putting the finishing touches to her daughter's Halloween outfit, Lucas would be here in an hour or so to take her trick or treating. She couldn't believe it was Halloween already, soon it would be Thanksgiving and then Christmas. As she stood back to survey her creation her hand absentmindedly caressed her stomach. She was now 22 weeks pregnant. Two weeks ago when she'd had her twenty week scan Lucas had come with her. Despite having two children this was part of the whole thing he'd never experienced. She was delighted to be able to share it with him. She in truth had been more captivated watching him watch their baby than in doing so herself. By mutual consent they'd chosen to keep the sex of the baby something to be discovered when he or she was born. Brooke had done the same thing with Lauren, Haley had with Hannah and was with her baby, and Karen the same with hers. She firmly believed that while some advancements in the medical field were great, some in her opinion fell into the category of unnecessary. Besides which if she were going through the effort of pushing the baby out of her she wanted a surprise at the end of it. Lucas had a picture of the scan framed on his mantelpiece. When she shared his reaction with her friends Rachel had been quick to jump in saying that she'd one upped Peyton. She hadn't even thought about Peyton. Honestly going to the scan together and watching how he drank in the image of their baby melted her heart, it just felt exactly like it should feel. The rest of the world had dropped away and it felt like they were a family. A real family. The kind she'd longed for, for as long as she could remember. She was beginning to show, she was definitely a late bloomer when it came to pregnancy. Though she'd been unable to button her favourite pair of jeans from very early on in her pregnancy she didn't really fill out until quite late on. The doctor had told her with Lauren it had been because she was small, therefore her baby would be small. This time the doctor had given her an added piece of information, being that considering the severity of her morning sickness and the fact at over 5 months she was still suffering from it meant it was likely she'd have another small baby, possibly smaller than Lauren was. Sometimes Brooke wondered why women bothered having children when she looked at herself, Haley and Karen. Haley, though she wasn't admitting it having now reached 30 weeks was beginning to panic. Well she'd been panicking a while now. Though there was no evidence to suggest that she'd suffer premature labour again with this baby she was still terrified. At least she'd reached a milestone of 30 weeks though. She'd been hospitalised two weeks prior to this point with Hannah so everyone else was staying positive, as too was Haley to the outside world. But Brooke knew her friend well enough to know that even a twinge was enough to create a frenzy in their home with Haley ready to get to the hospital. Haley's doctor had been fantastic though despite all the trips to visit. The doctor seemed to handle Haley pretty well and was sympathetic to why Haley was such a nervous wreck. And then there was herself who was so unbelievably ill it wasn't funny. And of course Karen, who at 35 weeks was the size of a mansion let alone a house. Brooke secretly thought if that was water retention she must be retaining the capacity of the Nile. She certainly didn't look like a woman with a little over 4 weeks before her due date. If anything she looked about 10 weeks past it.

"Mommy is it ready?" Brooke surveyed her handiwork before turning to her daughter.

"Sure thing baby girl." As she slipped the outfit over Lauren's head she once again felt the growing need to tell her daughter she would soon be a big sister. She still felt like she needed to decide their future before she mentioned the baby, but the fact was she was getting increasingly weak and the dosage of the iron tablets were being increased regularly. She was becoming unable to do the things she'd usually do with Lauren and it wouldn't be that much longer before she started showing, then the whole town would know. She smoothed the wrinkles from the material and stepped back to look at her daughter.

"Wow sweetie you sure do look scary." Brooke glanced up at the clock and was surprised to see how much time had passed while she put the finishing touches to the outfit. "Your dad will be here any minute now, we best get your wig on and find your broomstick." The green hairpiece was slipped over Lauren's brunette locks before she ran off to get her broomstick.

"Hey." Brooke turned to find Lucas standing in the kitchen with her.

"Hey Luke." She didn't really know why she fought the urge to go over and greet him with a kiss, it seemed like forever since she'd been in his arms and her longing to go back there was unparalleled. She thought he must feel the same as he made his way over to her, but he surprised her by dropping to his knees placing one hand on her stomach.

"Hello baby, I hope you're being good for mommy. We can't wait for you to get here." His lips brushed her stomach before he stood, when he did so he was so close to her she could smell him, she tilted her face upwards to look at him and smiled. These were the moments when in her heart she knew – Peyton would never mean to him what she did. They would never share what she shared with him. She knew that if she stretched onto her tip toes their lips would meet, she just wasn't sure if she was ready for that step.

"Daddy!" Brooke stepped back as if burned at the sound of their daughter. He opened his arms out and she flew into them and he swung her up.

"Hello princess, ready to go trick or treating?"

"Yes daddy. Can mommy come too?" Lucas looked at her and obviously she looked as exhausted as she felt.

"Sweetheart I think after putting so much effort into your wonderful costume that mommy is a little tired, how about we let her get some rest while we go out and then when we come back I'll stay for a while and we can watch something scary and eat some popcorn." Brooke smiled at how well he was able to handle her. With a kiss from Lauren they were both gone, she was barely through the door of her bedroom before she heard Karen shout her name. Sighing she turned back and headed into Karen's room. Karen was looking really uncomfortable on the bed and Brooke couldn't imagine what she'd feel like a few weeks from now.

"What time did Keith say he'd be back?" Brooke shrugged.

"I'm not too sure, he said he'd call when he was leaving but he hasn't yet. I guess he must still be loading up." With the baby on the way they had both decided that instead of renting Keith's apartment in Charlotte they'd be wiser to sell it, he'd gone there to clear it out now the sale was almost through. "I guess he must have more stuff there than we all thought." Karen nodded her face getting tighter and Brooke was sure there was the glimmer of a tear in her eye.

"Right well I wonder if you could give him a call and ask him to leave it for today and come home." Brooke stared at her puzzled, the plan had been to do it in just one day, since Lucas had promised to take Lauren trick or treating Nathan had volunteered to go and help Keith.

"I can if that's what you want." Karen nodded at her.

"I think it would be wise Brooke as I'm almost certain I'm in labour." Labour! Karen couldn't be in labour, she still had over 4 weeks until she was due. Not another premature labour in the family, Brooke wasn't sure her heart could cope. She stood still unable to control her thoughts long enough to perform any action.

"Brooke!" Karen's sharp voice shocked her enough to get moving. She grabbed her cell phone and called Keith, there was no answer so she tried Nathan. Again no answer. She left messages on both their phones before helping Karen off the bed and into the car. As she was about the pull out the drive she rushed back inside scribbling a note to Lucas and then running back to Karen. She'd never driven quite so erratically in her life and Karen had snapped that she wanted to get to the hospital alive. But they got there and she managed to haul Karen from the car and get her inside. Before Brooke had even asked for help Karen's waters broke across the floor. There was a flurry of activity as she was rushed off to be examined, Brooke following behind. Now they were at the hospital she allowed the panic to set in again.

"Right Karen it looks like you're about 6 cm so it probably won't be too much longer."

"But she's not due for almost 5 weeks. She can't be premature." The doctor turned to the hormonal and stressed Brooke and smiled calmly.

"You are?"

"She's my daughter." Karen answered smoothly.

"Right then your mother is 35 weeks so yes she's a little early but so much so that we're particularly worried about either her or the baby. Sometimes due dates can be a little off and sometimes a baby can just run out of room in there and want to get out early." Brooke's nerves calmed at that slightly.

"My sister-in-law had a premature labour so I just…worry." The doctor smiled sympathetically at her and rubbed her arm soothingly.

"It's fine, it's a valid worry but honestly this baby is obviously just ready to come out now, and by the size of mommy I guess you're just as ready for he or she to come out."

"Actually if it could wait a couple of hours that'd be great. Brooke has Keith called you back?" Brooke rummaged around her pockets before it dawned on her she'd left her cell phone at home.

"I must have left my cell at home." Disappointment flashed over Karen's face but she shrugged it off.

"Oh well you did your best honey, if he's here then great but if not he'll be coming home a father." The door was flung open at that point.

"Mom what's going on?" Lauren trailed in behind her father and ran to her mother wide eyed and fearful, missing her broom and her wig.

"Lucas calm down I'm in labour everything's fine." Brooke almost laughed at the state of him, if this was what he was like when Karen delivered she didn't even want to think what it would be like when it as their baby.

* * *

"Ok now Karen I want you to push now." Haley had been over an hour ago to collect Lauren leaving Brooke and Lucas with Karen. Haley said she'd managed to get hold on Nathan and they were on their back. But it was 2 hours from Charlotte and Karen's baby was not going to wait. Brooke and Lucas were on either side of Karen, each holding a hand and giving encouragement. Brooke was sure this wasn't an image a pregnant woman should see but stuck with it nevertheless. Lucas looked terrified, then again Brooke was pretty sure no one really wanted to see their mother going through this. Karen let out a long scream and she bore down.

"Okay now Karen this next one and the head will come out I think so it needs to be big." Brooke was almost certain Karen had to be completely insane for refusing any medication to help her through this. It was definitely not an approach she herself would try. As she helped Karen pull her legs into her body for one big push she willed her own strength into the obviously exhausted woman.

"That's great Karen, we've got the head, next one and your baby will be here. Come on you can do it." With another tortured cry the baby slithered out and Karen fell back exhausted. The thin reedy cry of a newborn filled the room and Brooke felt herself on the edge of crying. Lucas looked completely overwhelmed by what had just happened. Karen found the strength to prop herself up on her elbows to try and peer at her baby.

"Is it a boy or a girl?" Karen sounded completely exhausted but totally ecstatic. A nurse came over with a small bundle and placed the baby in Karen's waiting arms.

"Say hello to your beautiful baby boy momma." Brooke and Lucas peered in at the baby Karen was cuddling close to her.

"Karen I just want to have a check and see if the placenta is coming down or whether you need a shot to get things going." Brooke was the only one who seemed to notice the alarmed expression on the doctor's face as she finished her brief examination. She quickly rushed through reading Karen's file and came up looking concerned and bewildered. The doctor spoke in hushed tones to a nurse who stepped closer to Karen.

"Mrs Scott now I don't want you to be alarmed but I can't feel your placenta descending. On extremely rare occasions a heartbeat can be masked so that a perfectly normal pregnancy hides something else." All three looked at one another beginning to worry. "Mrs Scott I imagine now isn't the best time for you to receive this news but I think that this baby's heartbeat masked another and that another baby was hidden on both your scans by this little boy here." Confusion was the theme of the Scott family as the doctor continued to talk. "Now I want the nurse to just take your son for a minute or two because I'm almost certain that I felt a head descending and not your placenta."

"Another head?" Karen's voice was shaky.

"Mrs Scott I think that you're having twins." Karen shook her head.

"I can't feel any contractions."

"That is cause for concern, it's likely that given the fact that your son has been the only heartbeat we've been getting and the only baby on the scan that the second baby may well have died in vitro before we knew that there were twins. If the baby is still alive it will probably be quite a bit smaller than your son who is 5lb 9oz. Now I want to give you a shot that will hopefully restart contractions, I don't want to risk leaving things to see if they develop naturally as if your baby is still alive it may well put it in jeopardy." Brooke's head spun, it was an awful lot of information to digest in such a short period and she had no doubt that Karen couldn't possibly have done so before she was given the injection. It took just ten minutes for the contractions to start and Karen had to begin the gruelling process again – this time unsure whether the baby she was delivering would be alive at the end of it. The delivery seemed so much quicker than with the first baby, but the agony was unbearable when the baby was delivered and no sound omitted. A nurse took the baby and another few people joined them. Then there was a small, meek cry. Tears coursed down Karen's cheeks and Brooke could only guess at the relief she must be feeling.

"Is the baby okay?" The nurse came over with an even smaller bundle than previously.

"Mrs Scott your daughter is absolutely fine, a little on the small side at just 4lb 3oz but she seems perfectly healthy. She had a little fluid in her airways that we just cleared out but that can happen with any baby." Karen accepted the baby that was handed to her. She peered in at the tiny face.

"Would you like to hold your son as well?" Another nurse had entered the room bringing back the baby boy. Karen shifted to make room for both children in her arms.

"Mrs Scott I'm happy to say both babies seem to be in good health. I hope this has been a happy surprise rather than an awful shock. Given what we now know I'd say how surprised I am that you haven't developed any other problems in your pregnancy associated with multiple births, and that in fact 35 weeks is quite normal with multiple births. Now the nurse here will help you get up and get cleaned up. Did you want the babies taken down to the nursery or will your son and daughter-in-law have them?" No one bothered correcting the doctor's assumption that Brooke was not Karen's daughter-in-law. Brooke happily reached over and took the little girl into her arms while Lucas followed suit with the boy. The doctor disappeared and Karen was helped from the bed into the bath the nurse had run for her. Another nurse came in the strip the room and clean up, leaving Brooke and Lucas huddled in a corner with the twins.

"They're so perfect Lucas. I can't believe your mom had twins. How does it feel being a big brother?" Lucas smiled at her.

"It felt pretty scary while it was all happening, but now I can't wait until it's our baby I get to hold. I've never seen anything as perfect as this little creature. I bet Lauren will be so excited." Brooke could tell he was holding something back from her.

"What aren't you saying?"

"I feel more connected to this baby, my little brother than to…" He trailed off and she knew it was because he didn't want to finish the sentence. He didn't need to do so for her to understand exactly what he was saying. She didn't have chance to respond before Karen came back in, clean and redressed looking human once more. The nurse settled her onto the bed before leaving them. Lucas went and sat beside his mother and they both cooed over the baby in his arms. Brooke went to the window and stared out into the night wondering how on earth things were going to work once it was her baby she was holding.

"Karen!" The door opened and Keith burst in. he halted when his eyes came to rest on Karen, Lucas and his son. He visibly melted. "Oh Kar I'm so sorry I missed it. Did we have a boy or a girl?" Brooke turned round and laughed.

"Try both Keith." Keith took a step back as he looked from one baby to the other.

"Keith, the doctor said it's very rare but sometimes one baby can just eclipse the other. It wasn't until I'd had our son that she realised we had another baby waiting to come out."

"We have a son…and a daughter?" Karen nodded at him smiling. He looked up at Brooke.

"Can I hold her? Or is this one him?" Brooke smiled at him and walked towards him offering him the baby. He gently took her into his arms.

"It's her, and of course you can she's your daughter." The look of delight on Keith's face brought smiles to everyone in the room.

"So what are you going to call them?" Keith looked up at Karen.

"Well for a boy," She began as she looked down at the baby in Lucas' arms. "We thought Leo Ewan Scott and for a girl…"

"Lily Rose." Keith's voice was barely above a whisper as he said the name of the daughter he was so transfixed by.


	31. Nathan's Discovery

**I apologise for the fact this chapter is a little shorter than usual, there is a bit of a tense ending which I hope leaves you all wanting the next chapter.**

"Hey tutor mom how you feeling?" As usual she didn't bother knocking before walking to Haley's home. Nathan and Lucas had taken the girls to see Santa at the mall so she figured she'd take some time away from the chaos of living with Karen, Keith and the twins. She was certainly going to need to make a decision about the future soon, fact was that the twins would soon be of an age where they were ready to go into cots in their own room besides which once her baby arrived they'd certainly need more room.

"Like a whale." Brooke laughed as she flopped down into the armchair opposite Haley.

"Yeah it gets like that, just be thankful you never got to the size Karen did."

"It would be the two babies worrying me rather than the size. How are Leo and Lily?" Brooke laughed.

"They're fine, it's Karen and Keith you need to worry about." The twins were never asleep at the same time leaving their parents exhausted. Brooke had struggled with Lauren so she simply couldn't comprehend how you'd cope with two babies. Sometimes it seemed to her the twins were tag teaming their parents. Though in fairness their parents could tag team them also. Lauren was delighted with her aunt and uncle, though the fact that she had an aunt and uncle that were 6 years younger than her was a little bizarre. "So other than feeling like a whale how are you?"

"I'm probably better than I have been the entire pregnancy. I'm almost 36 weeks now Brooke and no baby yet, no signs of baby yet which is good. I know a lot of women that are ready to have the baby of them by this point cos they hate being so big but for me I'm just relieved. We've got to a point now where even if I did go into labour today my baby would be okay, no panic or worry. And for me that's great. I think if we were ever to have another baby I'd be able to relax a little more knowing that just because Hannah was premature doesn't mean any other baby will be. So now I'm just enjoying being pregnant, enjoying feeling this baby move instead of worrying that a movement is more than what it is." Brooke reached over and rubbed Haley's arm supportively.

"I know how scared you've been, and I'm glad you're able to get past it now. You need to be excited now."

"How are you feeling?"

"Terrified. Which is ridiculous really, I mean I'm just telling my daughter she's going to have a brother or sister. Luke said she actually asked for one for Christmas the other day so it's not like she won't be happy…" Brooke trailed off.

"Brooke you can't prolong this forever. Either you want to make it work with Luke or you don't. You've been living in this limbo for almost 5 months now and it's just crazy. Rachel might have been a little crazy in her approach, but we both know everything she said about the two of you was spot on."

"He asked if I'd mind doing Christmas at the house. He said that Karen's place was too small and unless we planned on having Christmas at the café in order to ensure enough room for us all then it seemed the best option."

"How do you feel about that?"

"I honestly don't Hales. Since I packed my stuff up I've not been back there. Lucas said it looks great now it's finished. I hate that it's not my home anymore, not that it ever was."

"It still could be, Brooke sooner or later you need to let it go. You can't keep your family on hold, besides. If you're honest with yourself we both already know what you're going to do." Brooke sighed deeply, slightly irritated that her friend knew her so well. Haley was right, if she was totally honest with herself she did already know what she was going to do. In the end Lucas Scott was the love of her life, and everything else would just have to be worked through.

"I wish it was my home and we were a family putting the tree and decorations up like you guys were here last week." Haley smiled at her.

"Next year." Brooke nodded and the two lapsed into silence, both lost to their own thoughts, Haley of her impending labour and Brooke into dreams of what life would be like a year down the line. She could picture them in their house, the tree up, the lights twinkling, Lucas holding Lauren up to place the star on top of the tree while she encouraged their baby to take his or her first steps.

"Haley, Lucas told me that Peyton has been pushing for the family to meet Jonathon. Lauren still doesn't know about him and with the twins Karen and Keith just don't really the time. I'm worried she'll just appear on Christmas Day if someone doesn't visit."

"Very subtle. Brooke if I have to be the one to take the bullet for us all and for Christmas then I want a good present." The two girls laughed together.

"Mommy!"

"Mama." The greetings for their daughters interrupted their laughed as Lauren hurtled into the room followed by a toddling Hannah. At almost 18 months old Hannah was picking up her pace, breaking into a baby run when she was delighted to greet someone. Bringing up the rear were the exhausted looking fathers. Lauren jumped into Brooke's lap and Haley opened her arms out to raise Hannah onto her knee.

"You guys look beat." Nathan rested on the arm of the sofa his arm going round his wife.

"I don't think Hannah had the slightest idea what was happening, but all the twinkling lights and shiny paper were like speed to her. Lauren however has refused to tell me what she asked Santa for which I think is very mean."

"Uncle Nathan! If I tell you he might not bring it."

"Nate honey there's a message on the pad. Someone called for you said it was urgent." Nathan pulled a face before disappearing off into the study. Lucas gave his friend a hug and they all chatted amongst themselves for a while until Brooke gave Lucas a nod. It was obviously now or never. They bid Haley goodbye and were almost gone before Nathan came back.

"Guys is there any chance your mom would have Lauren for an hour or so later? There's something I need to talk to you about and it's very urgent."

"As long as she's in bed I don't see there being a problem."

"Good, well as soon as she's asleep you need to come over." Brooke couldn't help but wonder what exactly had Nathan acting so strangely. Nothing was ever urgent where he was concerned. He was too happy to take things as they came.

* * *

Nathan's behaviour had left Brooke unsettled, it seemed to have had the same effect on Lucas too. It left neither of them in the right mood for telling Lauren about the baby, so both decided that given that she'd asked for a brother or sister for Christmas that they'd wait until Christmas Day the following week to tell her. Though Brooke was showing now she was approaching 28 weeks it was easy to disguise with careful clothing, well at least so that Lauren couldn't tell that like her grandma had previously and her aunt now her mother was clearly developing a bump. They'd waited this long so another week seemed a small time. The drive to Nathan and Haley's house was silent, both mulling over ideas as to why Nathan was requesting their presence. The mood was sombre as they went inside. Haley looked small enveloped in the sofa and she looked tense. Lucas grabbed her hand and she felt soothed by him. They sat close together on the other sofa while Nathan took the armchair.

"I have a confession to make to you both. At Hannah's birthday party Luke was saying how Peyton was pressuring for the family to meet Jonathon, particularly Lauren. I knew that neither of you were ready for that step so I decided to go see them. I hoped that uncle Nate was going to buy some time for you before she did something crazy like show up at your door. Which I'm guessing it did since she hasn't." Brooke was surprised to hear Nathan had been to see Jonathon, looking at Haley it was clear she was aware of his visit. Brooke wasn't sure if she was more shocked that he'd done it and they'd both stayed quiet or that Peyton hadn't told Luke. "Honestly I wanted to see him really considering how you felt Luke, I held that boy, who don't get me wrong is a cute baby, but he just didn't have an ounce of Scott in him. I told Haley and her response was that he was a baby, you couldn't always tell. But for me it just didn't feel right. I tried talking to Peyton about it, asking if he looked like someone in her family maybe. She shut off. I know Ellie had given her pictures of her family so she would seen if there was a resemblance. She seemed edgy when I talked about it. I tossed and turned for days after. I just didn't feel right, and you weren't feeling any different about him so…I decided to root around in Peyton's past, just try and figure out what she'd been up to in L.A." Brooke swallowed. It felt very much like Nathan was confessing he had doubts over the paternity of Jonathon, much like Rachel had done. Despite everything Brooke's instinct was still to say that Peyton wouldn't purposely do something like that. "It's been a while coming obviously. But really it wasn't too hard finding something about her. My thoughts were confirmed earlier, the urgent phone call I had. Well I need you two to meet someone." Nathan paused and a man walked into the room, he hovered somewhat awkwardly aside the seating area. Nathan stood up and placed a hand on the other man's back, giving him a slight push into the room. "Lucas, Brooke this is Julian Baker. He's a film producer from L.A." Bewildered she stood and shook the man's hand and Lucas did the same.

"It's nice to meet you both, I wish I brought better news with me. I'm sorry this has gone on so long but…I've been away producing a movie in London for the last 9 months. When I got back I had messages from Nathan and I called him as soon as I got them. Between us we seem to have been able to paint quite the picture." Nathan sat again, this time beside Haley leaving the armchair available for Julian. The brunette man sat and hung his head, pushing his hands through his hair before looking back up at them both.

"I discovered that Peyton had been living in Julian's apartment in L.A. Julian gave me details and I gave him some."

"Your brother asked me what I knew of Peyton. To be honest coupled with his messages and the fact I hadn't been able to contact her at home in a while and her things being missing I was worried about her. I guess I should start at the beginning really. We met a few days after she'd come to L.A. she was so…miserable. I made her laugh and we slept together. We continued to sleep together for a week or so, Peyton was still staying in a motel. She came to me and told me she was a week late. I was there when she took the test. We were going to have a baby. I won't lie I was terrified. We barely knew each other but seemed to hit it off and like one another so I suggested she move in. I know it seems a big step so quickly but it felt like the right thing to do given the circumstances. Well I got the offer for the movie but I turned it down, or I was planning to. It would have meant being in London when the baby was born and I didn't want that. I was in Chicago meeting with a writer about a project and Peyton called to tell me that she'd miscarried the baby. She seemed upset, I was upset. She insisted I go do the movie since they'd be no baby. I was hesitant at first but I figured it might be a good idea. If after I came back we were able to work things out then good. If not then we'd both know it had only gone as far as it did because of the baby. For a while when I was calling her things seemed okay. When we met she told me things about you both, mainly you Lucas. I'm pretty certain after speaking to Nathan that most of what she said were her version of the truth. One day on the phone she said she'd seen you. That she'd been to the bookstore where you were signing. She said she'd just planned on saying hi. She told me your daughter had been there, that you'd been there Brooke. She sounded – bitter. That was the last time I spoke to her. She stopped answering her cell and was never home. I just figured that she'd decided we weren't meant to be. Then I got home." No one spoke as Brooke and Lucas digested what Julian had said. Nathan had been shocked after speaking to the guy on the phone and had known that this was something he should tell Lucas and Brooke, he knew they'd need to hear this from Julian.

"So what does all this mean?" Brooke heard the shake in Luke's voice. She knew what Julian was about to say before he even opened his mouth.

"It means that I'm almost certain that Jonathon is my son, not yours."

"But you don't know that she wasn't pregnant when she met you, that she just said it was your baby." Brooke wasn't about to just accept this, while Julian's version of things answered some questions it left her feeling lost in regards to the Peyton she thought she knew even after everything.

"Obviously that's why I'm only 99 % sure that Jonathon is mine. But if this is as calculated as I now think it is, I have to ask something personal. Did you use protection? The one time you slept with her. She told me she was using birth control, so on a few occasions that's all there was. Which I now suspect was just words."

"Let me get this straight, you're saying that this isn't an accident, that it's not even a case of not knowing who the father is. You're saying Peyton went to L.A. with the intention of getting pregnant to the first she found to fit the timeframe to enable her to come back her, and pass her child off as Luke's baby." Brooke's head felt like it was about to explode.

"That's what I'm saying."

"If I didn't believe him or think that it was possible I wouldn't be putting you both through this. This afternoon Haley and I discussed what your options are. And we thought that it would be wise now to not go to Peyton to ask for this but to get a legal representative to request a paternity test." As numb as she was feeling Brooke saw the sense in what Nathan said. If they went to Peyton to ask for the test she'd either lie or fight them. Perhaps even disappear before they had chance to do anything. She was about to speak, to agree. But Lucas spoke first.

"I'll kill her!" And with that he was out the door before any of the others had chance to flinch.

**I hope you all liked this chapter and can now see why Rachel was the only one to mention paternity test up to this point as annoying as that might have been.**


	32. Aftermath

**Firstly I want to thank everyone for the great reviews, it probably hasn't been easy to stick with reading this through the P/L/J drama, its only been easy writing it since I always knew how it would end so thanks to you all. I hope you enjoy this chapter.  
**

Sick, that was what was most prevalent in how Lucas Scott felt as the man his brother had found, Julian Baker, was talking. He wasn't sure if the sickness was a result of the pain in his gut, a pain he could only label as anger. Anger that she'd been so cold and calculating. That she'd planned all along to destroy his happiness with Brooke. That she'd spent months complaining he wasn't trying hard enough with his son, when all along she knew. That she'd badgered him to tell Lauren she had a baby brother.

"_It means that I'm almost certain that Jonathon is my son, not yours."_

Unlike Brooke he had no further questions on the matter, he wasn't even sure what she'd asked or what Julian's response had been. Julian's voice kept replaying in his head, the words they spoke after that were a blur as he searched Julian's face and his memory for a resemblance to the baby he'd been told was his. He'd never let himself believe before that there was no Scott resemblance in the boy, simply because he believed that was his mind playing tricks on him. But Nathan saw it, Nathan who went there to buy Lucas time, Nathan who saw everything clearer than anyone else and put time and effort into making things clear to everyone, into finding the truth. Nathan his brother, who at this moment had done something so incredible that he knew he'd never be able to thank him enough. He heard them calling his name as he sprinted from the house, he was by nature a fairly passive man. But this was beyond anything he'd ever experienced and so great was his fury that even his beloved Brooke banging on the car was not enough to stop him hurtling down the street, one destination in mind.

She looked up when she heard the door open, and smiled when she saw him. How she was stupid enough to miss the hatred in his eyes he had no idea. Now he knew the truth he could easily read what her smile meant. His unannounced and unplanned arrival meant to her that she was beginning to win – how wrong she was.

"You bitch!" He was across the room in a matter of seconds, his hand around her throat pining her to the wall. "How could you do this? I could kill you right now." Her eyes bulged and he could see the panic and fear in them. He felt strong arms dragging him away from her.

"Luke she's not worth it." Nathan must have broken every speed limit there was to get there. He didn't fight as his brother tore him away, his eyes stayed locked on her as she dropped to the ground, her hand raising to her throat. She gasped for breath and finally looked up at him, she was scared. He breathing was laboured and heavy, unable to control his raging emotion. He turned and slammed his fist into the wall, he was unsure just how many times he did this. He saw the wall turn red with his blood and the cracks appear in the plaster. Soft hands were felt on his arms as she turned his body into her own. Anger dissipated at her touch and he sank to his knees burying his head in her middle as she stroked his back lovingly. He felt the warm tears on his cheeks as his anger gave way to the hurt and agony of the past months.

"What the hell is going on?" Peyton's whiny voice broke the spell Brooke had created around them and just like that the anger returned, he stood again tearing himself away from Brooke once again ready to hurt the blonde who had tried to destroy the life he'd built with Brooke. But it wasn't him who spoke first.

"You tell us Peyton." She was startled at the sound of the voice and turned again to the doorway through which he burst through minutes earlier, Julian must have been in the car with Nathan and Brooke. He saw Peyton pale as though she finally realised that her lies were being uncovered.

"Julian, what are you doing here?" Lucas was shaking with his anger, he felt Brooke take his hand. They both knew well enough that it was all the restraint he needed to stop him flying at Peyton once more. The air was heavy in the room and they waited. All knew that no one would leave until the truth was out there.

"What do you think Peyton? How many more lies have you concocted to create this web of deceit? Don't you think it's about time you told the truth? I know now that you didn't miscarry our baby, that he's here in this house." Julian began to walk further into the room, getting closer to Peyton, his poker face still firmly in place. "I now know that you never felt anything at all for me. That I was just the first guy you met, that all I was to you was someone to get you pregnant so you could come back here and destroy Lucas' family."

"No! I know that things seem bad but it didn't start out that way. When I got to L.A. I was heartbroken about Lucas. Yes he said he didn't want me and I was devastated but honestly you made me smile. What happened was genuinely an accident, I didn't plan on getting pregnant. I was honest with you at the start. I was honest until…I read about his book tour before I told you I'd had a miscarriage. I knew she was with him on it. I also knew that even if the rumours about them being together as a couple were just rumours at the time that it would happen eventually. And I knew that it was because of Lauren, Lucas needs to be a good father unlike Dan and for him that would always mean being with the mother of his child, even if that would trap him to someone he didn't love."

"No Peyton, regardless of Lauren I am in love with Brooke, I want to be with her for no reason other than that. I'm not trapped or beholden to her because of our children. Our children are a symbol of our love, not the reason for it." Peyton stared at him like he'd grown another head. Then she smiled slowly.

"Okay Lucas." It was clear from her tone that she was agreeing with him verbally, he knew enough to know he had not changed her thinking. "So I realised this was the chance to give him options. I told you that I miscarried and stayed in L.A. until I was almost due, then I came here." Julian laughed his contempt.

"Whether it started out a malicious plot or just ended up that way Peyton it's all the same thing. You came here and passed my son off as someone else's. You didn't consider my feelings, his feelings or the baby's feelings should this ever come out. I mean honestly Peyton did you ever plan on telling the truth."

"Of course not, Peyton's plan was to pass the baby off as Luke's, thinking that given time he'd go to her and forget Lauren and me."

"Surely when I told you Brooke was pregnant you knew your plan would never work."

"I was trying to give you benefit of the doubt Peyt, hoping that maybe you were just cruel enough to not mention the possibility of the baby having Julian as a father, that there was a chance it could go either way. But truth is you always knew that Jonathon was Julian's baby didn't you. There was never a chance of him being Luke's. This wasn't wishful thinking this was just evil." Lucas was surprised to hear Nathan speak. But he was right, this was planned and it was beyond comprehension that anyone would be so spiteful. Before another word could be spoken the unmistakeable sound of a baby was heard through the house. Julian practically bolted up the stairs. While from them this ordeal was drawing to an end for Julian it was just beginning. Somehow he would need to find a way to work past this and work with Peyton to raise their child. Julian came back into the room holding the baby that until now Brooke had heard of but never seen.

"He looks like you." The words left Lucas' mouth without thought. It was the simple truth. If there had been a moment before this day that he'd seen the pair together there certainly would never have been a question of Jonathon being his, he was so like his father.

"How could you even think let alone go through with denying me this?" The pain in his voice was clear for them all to hear, leaving them wondering how Peyton could possibly answer Julian's question.

"I didn't think you'd miss what you'd never had." Her lies now in tatters around them all Lucas no longer wanted to be a part of this. It was time to leave Julian with her, give them chance to attempt to bring Julian into his son's life. He turned away and began to walk to the door, he paused briefly beside Julian and laid a hand on the other man's shoulder.

"Your son is adorable, and I pray to god he is as like you in action as he is in appearance. Good luck." Nathan and Brooke both followed Lucas' leave to walk out of the door.

"Lucas you can't hate me for this, I was trying to do what was best for you. I only did this because I love you – more than she ever will."

"You have no idea how I feel Peyton Sawyer." The words were thrown back over her shoulder as the trio continued to leave the house.

"I have a good idea, I fought with everything I had for the man I love. You claim to love Lucas but you were quick to walk away Brooke Davis. That's not love! You're still a spoiled, petulant bratty child who thinks the world should come to you. Well it doesn't work like that, you can't love anything or anyone. You're tainted by a twisted upbringing and a boy that wanted me more than he wanted you. You'll never love him like I do." Before anyone in the room had chance to blink Brooke was back in the house her hand delivering a strong, stinging slap across Peyton's face, the force of which twisted the blonde's head and all hear her neck crick with the speed and power of the blow. A handprint was visible on her cheek.

"You don't know a thing about me. I love more freely than you will ever know. I loved you didn't I? You're as good as dead to me now, and good riddance. I pray you're a better mother than a friend, daughter or lover." As Brooke turned to walk away again Peyton grabbed out for her hair pulling her back close. Lucas was beside the pair in a second as was Nathan, prising Peyton away from Brooke.

"Touch her again and I will kill you. Come anywhere near my family and you'll wish you'd never been born." His voice as cold as ice as he delivered his threat Lucas took Brooke's arm and marched them both out the door with Nathan bringing up the rear. As they bid Nathan goodbye and got into Lucas' car he leaned heavily back against the seat, his head hanging loose against the headrest his eyes on the roof of the car.

"I guess I should go tell my mom the news." Her hand reached across the cover the one on his knee.

"Maybe we should go for a walk, down the beach like when we first dated or maybe somewhere closer. I think we should process for a while before talking to your mom and Keith."

"God only knows how Julian is going to cope with this. He doesn't seem to deserve what she's done to him."

"None of us do Luke."

* * *

The only place he was able to drive to was the River court, it seemed like his car was an autopilot to get them there. He caught a glimpse of her bathed in moonlight when he turned to look at her. She was breathtaking. Her abdomen was slightly extended, enough so he could see that she was obviously pregnant, not so much anyone would guess if they didn't know. He walked slowly to the middle of the court and laid down staring up at the stars.

"You'd never believe what is going on in each and every house in this small town when you consider how calm it all seems." He tilted his head in order to locate her. She was stood on the edge of the River staring out across the water at the lights of the houses.

"No you wouldn't. How do you feel?"

"I don't really know, disappointed I guess. Somewhere inside me I still held onto the girl I used to love so dearly. I don't even recognise her now." He closed his eyes and focused on nothing but his own breathing, unable to find the words to respond to what she'd said. "I remember the first time I came here. It was the showdown between you and Nathan. All I wanted was to be the first girl to say they had you. After that you and Peyton would make things work. I was the slut, she was the princess. Well princess is stretching things, but she was the relationship one of the two of us. The one someone could build a future with. Anna would be devastated by how it's all gone."

"Brooke stop. I don't want to talk about her anymore, I don't want to think about her even. I certainly don't want reminding of how she used to be, how I used to feel." His voice came out harsher than he'd intended. He knew she was talking to fill the silence simply because she hated them.

"I think you were right – about our house being the best place to have Christmas." Our house. It seemed foreign to hear her call it that now.

"Okay then."

"Luke…"

"Don't Brooke, please just let me lay here." Thoughts were whirling through his mind so fast it was hard to choose any single one to focus on. He heard her yawn and briefly wondered what the time was. He felt tired, tired of the past few months. While he'd not shared this information with anyone else the publishing house was requesting the first 3 chapters of his new novel, and he'd not written a word. He'd not even got as far as developing a plot. Maybe he should just base it on his life, what Peyton had done seemed very much like it was out of some twisted Single White Female, Basic Instinct type film or book. "I'm glad I don't have a rabbit."

"What?" It wasn't until Brooke questioned him that he realised he'd said it out loud.

"Nothing, just stupid thoughts." Right now the last thing he really wanted to do was talk, not just about Peyton but about anything. He'd spent months talking and now he just wanted to be. Despite now knowing the truth his world still seemed adrift. It felt like this should be making him happy, but he wasn't. He'd hoped that somehow the entire episode could be erased but now it was it left him feeling empty. But it hadn't been erased, it had still happened and there was still an aftermath to deal with. "I want you to have the house, you, Lauren and the baby." At first he thought Brooke might have dropped off, or just not heard him.

"And what will you do?"

"Stay in the apartment. My mom's place is get crowded now. One of us needed to make a decision so I have. You take the house, don't protest because of what it was going to be. It seems ridiculous to sell it when you and our children need it."

"You don't think maybe it's time we all moved in there? The family." His head was throbbing and he was unsure whether he was really ready to do this now.

"No I don't. I think it's time we made the break Brooke and stopped messing around." He couldn't bring himself to open his eyes, sit up and look at her.

"You want us to break up?" He chuckled softly.

"We already are broken up, you ended things remember?"

"Lucas you know that it wasn't that black and white. That there was still a way for us to work. Last week you wanted that, this morning you wanted that."

"I love you Brooke, more than you'll ever know. But I can't do this. Jonathon isn't my son and suddenly you want us to all be a family again and go straight back to the original plan, well I can't do it."

"What are you talking about?"

"I love you, but I can't be with someone who doesn't want me like I want them and it's become clear to me that that person isn't you."

"But I do want you Luke, I always have."

"Brooke I didn't do anything wrong. I slept with Peyton before anything happened with us, and you knew about it. Yet it feels like the past 5 months have been you punishing me. I understand the shock of it was awful, I understand that it was hurtful and confusing and difficult. I'd be able to understand weeks, a month or two. But I don't understand 5. I don't understand how your first reaction was to just walk away. I don't understand how you could dismiss us even when you discovered we were having a baby. And I don't understand how it took me begging for you to even consider trying to make things work with us. Yet you take away the baby and suddenly everything's okay." He felt her come closer to him, knew she'd sat beside him and felt her reach for his hand.

"Lucas I wasn't punishing you and I never meant it to feel like that. I've always tried to do what's best. It's not Julian showing up today that made me want us, I always wanted us. I was scared, but I always knew that it'd work out for us. Just this morning Haley and I were talking and she asked why I was still not making a decision when we both knew what I was going to do. And I did, I always knew." Finally he opened his eyes and looked at her.

"Trouble is Brooke, I don't believe you."

* * *

"So you must have talked to Brooke given that I've been summoned here. So Hales come on get it out your system." Lucas didn't care for pleasantries. When Haley had called him this morning he'd known exactly why she was asking for him to come and visit her. Sure she'd probably planned to ask how he was dealing with everything that had happened, and then nicely lead into the issue with Brooke. He'd had absolutely no sleep last night and the last thing he had the energy for was any pretence. He threw himself back into the armchair and waited for her to begin.

"Well I have yes, I'm worried about you both, and Lauren, and the baby too." He stretched out and yawned.

"Well I'm a little tired but pretty much okay. Thanks for your concern can I go now?" He didn't bother moving knowing full well it wouldn't be that easy. She gives him a pointed look and he sighs, knowing he'll get no peace until she unburdens herself.

"Brooke told me you basically said you don't want to be with her. That can't possibly be what you meant, can it?"

"I love her, I want to spend my life with her. But I can't."

"That doesn't even make sense Lucas."

"Haley I love her more than anything and I spent so long trying to prove that to her, to fight for her. But she just doesn't feel the same way. I can't try again with her if I'm spending everyday waiting for the next thing that sends her running from me unwilling to work through things. You and Nathan have had your share of problems in your marriage and together you always find your way through them. I firmly believe that without that all the love in the world becomes irrelevant. And Brooke has shown that she just doesn't have the same commitment to making us work that I do."

"She was ready to give it a shot regardless of Jonathon, before Julian showed up and the truth came out." He shrugged.

"So she told me too Hales, but…I guess it's just too late now. Love isn't always enough."

"You just can't be serious Lucas. You can't possibly be prepared to walk away from her, from Lauren and the baby."

"I'm not going anywhere, I'll still be Lauren's father, I'll be in her life as much as I was when I first came back, and I'll do the same with the baby. I can't imagine my life without Brooke in it, but I guess I don't trust that she's really in this with me. I'm scared she'll walk away when the going gets tough. Haley nothing you've got to say can change how I feel right now. Let's just lay this whole episode to rest and focus on Christmas for now, everything else can wait." He got up and went to Haley's side, he bent to kiss her cheek before heading home. Minutes after Lucas had left the room the other Scott entered.

"Hey how'd it go with Luke?" Nathan settled in next to his wife and rested a hand on her baby bump.

"Brooke didn't get it wrong." Nathan let out a low whistle in response to his wife's statement. "But he does love her. I think…I think maybe it's just Brooke turn to fight for them."


	33. Christmas Eve

The soft knock on the door was all it took to wake Brooke from her light slumber, her eyes darted to the clock which read 6a.m. before she pulled back the covers. She sighed deeply, just one more day until Christmas. She knew Lauren would be beyond excited the entire day, particularly when they went to the house that night, everyone was planning on staying the night in order to spend Christmas morning together. She yawned as she pulled on her robe and opened the door – to find a moses basket. The angelic face that looked up at Brooke with wide eyes and trembling lip almost brought her to tears. Instinct kicked in and she bent to scoop the baby into her arms. The note that was pined to the snowsuit was taken off as she stepped back into the warmth of the room. It didn't take a genius to work out who the baby was, despite only having seen him once. She slipped the fluffy suit from him and pulled faces at him until he no longer looked about to sob. Then she settled him in her lap and grabbed the scrap of paper.

_I couldn't risk leaving him outside a motel. I knew you'd take care of him until Julian could be contacted. I won't apologise for what I did, you wouldn't believe me even if I did. But the fact is I never really wanted a baby, Julian obviously wants to be a father so he's welcome to do so._

_Peyton_

Brooke couldn't believe that Peyton had just left her baby on someone's doorstep and apparently disappeared. Careful not to wake Lauren she took the baby into the living room and called the motel Julian was staying at. They connected her to his room and she pulled faces at Jonathon while she waited for Julian to answer. A groggy voice grunted a greeting at her.

"Julian, it's Brooke Davis. I have Jonathon with me." Those words were enough to wake Julian up who demanded she repeat what she'd said, not bothering for an explanation after hearing it again Julian requested her address and hung up on her. Jonathon really was an adorable baby, Brooke wondered if she'd have melted so easily for him had he been Luke's baby. She couldn't even begin to process the events of the last twenty minutes. To someone like her, a person who was utterly devoted to her child she couldn't possibly comprehend how Peyton had just walked away from hers. It was almost as if she had no further use of Jonathon now he was no longer a tool to win over Lucas. She heard tyres screech and was up opening the door as Julian stepped foot on the porch. His arms were open ready to take his son from her. She handed the baby over to his father who cuddled him close and kissed his head. Brooke motioned Julian back into the house and closed the door on the coldness behind him. As the door closed Julian turned to look at her.

"What happened?"

"I'm not really sure, there was a knock at the door and then when I opened it he was there. There was a note asking I contact you, saying she'd never really wanted a baby and you obviously did." Julian seemed too stunned to speak so she continued. "I don't really know what's going on but it seems wise to go over there and talk to her. I'd be willing to look after him if you wanted me to." Julian sat in the armchair.

"I'm not sure I want to talk to her, part of me is glad I have him. I mean looking at the person she is can you actually say she seems like someone who should have the wellbeing of a child dependant on her, the mortality of that same child guided by her."

"I guess I can see your point." Brooke sat opposite him. "You know I remember when I was growing up, I had all the money I could ever need – but my parents were never around. I pretty much lived at Peyton's house after we met. We just went from strangers to inseparable best friends within days. She was so much fun, she didn't brood, she drew pictures that were happy back then. I remember her mom, Anna. God I loved her. She was…words can't describe Anna Sawyer." Tears came to Brooke's eyes just thinking of the woman who before Karen had been the closest thing she'd ever had to a real mother. "I wish she was here to meet your son, she'd have loved him. In my heart, looking back I think the Peyton I knew died with her. The girl that was left after…I still loved her but she was so different. And now, even she's gone. Replaced by a stranger who I can't understand. I don't know how she became so twisted, so evil and so easily able to walk away from her child." Brooke swiped at her eyes to clear the tears and shook the sorrow off herself. "I'm sorry if you don't want to hear this, I just want you to know she was a good person once."

"I guess it wouldn't hurt to go see her." Brooke nodded.

* * *

It was still early when she'd thrown her clothes on after Julian had left. The house was still quiet and she knew it would be at least an hour before Lauren was up. She scribbled a note to Karen just in case she or Keith awoke before she was back and wrapped Jonathon back up in his snowsuit. She taped a note to Julian on the door as she softly closed it. She didn't imagine for a second he'd read it. His talk with Peyton would most likely be a long one. She considered that she should perhaps have asked his permission for what she was about to do before he left but waved the thought away. It didn't take long for her to reach her destination, she unbuckled the baby from the car seat in Keith's car and trudged to where she knew she needed to be. She was a little surprised to see someone was already there.

"Peyton?" The figure at the grave shot up and turned to her.

"How did you know I'd be here?" Brooke shifted Jonathon awkwardly in her arms.

"I wasn't looking for you, I came to introduce Jonathon to his grandma Anna. Julian has gone to your house to talk to you."

"The Comet is all packed up Brooke, I'm leaving town. I just wanted to talk to my mom before I left." Brooke briefly wondered how in the space of a few days they'd gone from trying to kill each other to standing talking early one morning in a cemetery.

"What about Jonathon?" Peyton smiled softly.

"You already know." Brooke shook her head.

"I know that you're giving him to Julian, but I don't understand it." The wind began to whip about them and Brooke watched as Peyton's hair blew across her face, obscuring the tear tracks she'd only just seen.

"I'm not her Brooke. My mom. It's funny, my mom set me the best example there could ever be to be a good person and good mom. Your mom set you possibly the worst and look at us. You're the good person who gets the good things and is a good mom and I'm the bitch who deserves nothing and walks away from her child."

"You'll never be her, but no one's asking that of you. By all means leave Tree Hill, go back to L.A. you and Julian don't need to be together to raise your son. He's just a baby, in a year's time this won't even matter. He never has to know what happened here. You still have chance to be a good mother to him."

"Maybe I am being. Maybe leaving him now is the best thing I can do for him. You won't believe this but I do love him. I didn't think I would, he was just a pawn in a game but I do love him. That's why I'm leaving him with Julian. I need to go Brooke, I need to go someplace where I can find the daughter that she would be proud of, until I do that, until I'm the person I should be I can't be his mother. I don't want to destroy his life like I've destroyed mine." Brooke watched her former friend's emotions overwhelm her. She smiled, not because the blonde was in pain but because somewhere in there the Peyton she knew was hiding. Brooke would never love her again, never forgive her or be able to have her in her life. But she did want Peyton to become the best she could be, for Jonathon's sake. She knew better than anyone how life could be without a loving mother. She wished every child could know the love she'd only ever seen others receive. "I hope one day I'll be worthy of being his mother, the day I am I'll come back to him."

"He'll be loved, Julian loves him."

"I know. Julian will do a better job raising him than I could right now. I know I have no right to ask this of you, or of Julian. But please don't ever tell him. Don't tell him what I've done. If he ever asks about me, just tell I love him and that I'd be there if I could. Please don't let him know the person his mother is."

"I won't. But be clear it's for his sake, not yours." The blonde nodded and touched a hand to the gravestone before walking away. Brooke closed her eyes and took a deep breath before walking to the spot Peyton had just vacated. She knelt down and twisted Jonathon in her arms so he was looking at the headstone, one hand reached out to touch it and she smiled. "Anna, I want you to meet Jonathon, your grandson."

* * *

Julian was sat in his car when she pulled into the driveway. He was out and over to the car before she'd opened her door. He unbuckled Jonathon and lifted him into his arms. Brooke didn't bother to invite him in assuming he'd simply follow her.

"She wasn't at her house. It was all locked up." Brooke closed the door behind them as they went inside. She could hear Karen and the babies in the kitchen. She went through and Julian followed.

"Hey Kar." Karen turned from the sink where she was testing the temperature of the bottles. Keith was sat at the table with a baby in each arm.

"Hi sweetie. Are you okay?" Obviously she'd seen the note, it had briefly explained the mornings events and where Brooke had gone. Brooke nodded.

"Is Lauren up yet?" Karen shook her head. Brooke turned her attention back to Julian who was struggling to remove the snowsuit from Jonathon, she moved over and expertly helped him. Once done she stepped back. "I know she wasn't at her house, she'd gone to see her mom." Karen looked up from where she was now seated feeding Lily, opposite Keith who was feeding Leo. "She said she's leaving because she loves him too much to destroy his life like she has her own and that one day she hopes she'll be a good enough person to be his mother. She asked that no one ever tells him the truth about all this mess." The other 3 adults stayed quiet in a shocked silence.

"I've no idea how to look after a baby, I don't know where to start." Brooke laughed.

"Well for starters I'd say from the way he's getting grizzly now and twisting to look at the twins bottles he's probably hungry. I'm not sure which formula Peyton has him on but he'll just have to have what the twins have for now. Come on I'll show you what to do."

"There's probably enough water cooled from the water I boiled for the twins Brooke." Brooke nodded and went over the counter.

"Now first off you would if there wasn't already some here, boil some fresh water and let it cool for 30 minutes. Then you put water in a bottle and add one scoop of formula per ounce of water. For a beginner like you if you look on the side of the formula carton here, it tells you how big a bottle your baby is likely to want. Now that's just a guideline and you can adjust it to suit your baby. Now looking at his age I'd say Jonathon needs a 5 oz bottle, but just in case he's a hungry boy we'll do a 6oz. so you pour in 6oz of water and put in 6 scoops of formula, then screw on the top and shake real well so the formula dissolves. Then you can either taste it, or sprinkle a few drops on the inside of your wrist to check the temperature is okay. If the water has cooled for longer than 30 minutes, or if you make a days worth of bottles up and put them in the fridge the bottle will need to be heated in warm water. Luckily this one has just been done so will be fine. Now you sit down and hold Jonathon like Keith is holding Leo." Julian did as instructed by Brooke and she handed him the bottle. He offered it to the baby who latched on with furious intensity.

"Guess he's definitely hungry then." Brooke rested a hand on Julian's shoulder.

"Now he's probably going to want feeding every 3 to 4 hours, but that really does vary between baby to baby. They are all individuals. Now Lily has just finished her bottle and so watch what Karen does to burp her. You need to burp babies after you feed them to get their wind up because they can't do it themselves." Julian watched Karen intently as she placed Lily over her shoulder and gently patted her back until she brought wind up.

"Just a warning though Julian, babies have a tendency to bring a little milk back up when you burp them." Julian turned from watched Karen to Keith as he spoke to him.

"I guess this is the right place to have found myself in with a baby and no idea of what to do."

"You know Brooke had no idea what she was doing when she first had Lauren. I had to show her everything that you probably need to be shown. It's hard for everyone at first but before you know it everything will just be second nature to you. You'll be able to do it in your sleep – which is a good thing with babies. Although things will be easier with Jonathon. Then again I suppose that depends on whether Peyton established a routine with him or not."

"A routine?" Julian questioned. Brooke almost laughed at his panicked tone.

"Yeah, babies need routine. I mean not like military or anything but some structure is good. They don't tend to know the difference between night and day because they sleep so much, so routine helps them adjust so that when they get a little older and sleep less but for longer periods the longest periods are at night like everyone else."

"I don't know if can do this."

"Of course you can. Despite what Peyton may have led you to believe about me and the people in this town we are all very friendly. Fact is if you hadn't shown up and told us all the truth then god knows what mess we'd still all be in. So now you need help, we'll help you."

"Brooke's right, it's pretty much baby crazy in this family right now. One more won't even be noticed. Right it's time to get these two dressed." Karen and Keith disappeared into their bedroom with the twins. Brooke slipped into the seat Karen had just vacated.

"It's Christmas tomorrow and we'll all be over at Luke's house. I want you to join us, today we can go and see what things are at Peyton's house, that's if she still hides a key in the same place and we can go and buy whatever else you need. Luke's probably at the house getting things ready so I'll give him a call let him know what's happened and see if he minds Lauren 'helping' him."

"I can't thank you enough for this. You two must be so happy now, Peyton and Jonathon are no longer and issue and you get to be together."

"Actually we're not together. Luke said that he loves me but can't be with me."

"But you're pregnant, I mean sorry I just thought you looked." Julian tried to back up at the horrified look on Brooke's face.

"I'm not offended, I just…Lauren doesn't know yet. With all the drama and things so messed up we just haven't told her. I didn't realise I was showing that much."

"So you're pregnant and you love him but he doesn't want you." Brooke shrugged.

"I was upset when he told me but I'm okay now. See the thing is I know him better than I know myself. He's hurting because he thinks I've only decided to try and make things work with us now we all know Jonathon isn't his baby. Which isn't the case. He'll come round though, people who are meant to be together always find their way in the end."

"You seem very confident and unaffected by it all." Brooke stood up ready to go and call Lucas.

"He loves me, and we're meant to be together. I have faith that we will be. And that's enough."

* * *

"Hey you." Her voice was soft and raspy. She shivered and wrapped her cardigan more tightly around herself. All three babies were asleep as was Lauren, Haley and Nathan were still up putting the last few presents round the tree. An exhausted Karen and Keith had more or less passed out as soon as the twins were down. It left just Brooke and Lucas. He was sat outside on the deck staring out across the expanse of lawn. He looked round when he heard her voice.

"You shouldn't be out here, you'll freeze, which won't be good for you or the baby." She smiled softly at him and went to sit beside him anyway.

"What do you see?"

"A swing set, and you see that big tree at the bottom of the garden, you could build a great tree house in there."

"Luke, I know I'm early but I want you to have this." She handed him a small gift wrapped in shiny red paper that glistened in the moonlight. He glanced up at her before tearing open the present. He examined it in his hand turning it over before bringing his gaze up to hers a smile on his face. To some it may just be a plain gift she had given, just a book. But this was their book. A book that was the beginning of something special.

"The Winter of Our Discontent. Thank you." She smiled back.

"Look inside." _I shall always fondly remember the first time I read this book, for it was the moment my life changed. Now almost 7 years later I hope it shall change my life once more. Lucas Scott come what may I shall always love you. I envisage my future with no one but you, with our children and then their children surrounding us. May you never doubt that my heart has always been yours. Will you marry me? Brooke._

**I know the scene with Brooke/Peyton is probably a bit unexpected. I always knew Peyton would leave Jonathon with Julian once it all come out and my first instinct was to write that it was a callous act now Jonathon was no longer of use to her, however as a mother I find it impossible to comprehend how anyone would not love their child regardless of how or why the child was conceived therefore I had to write her motivations the way I did. **

**Also Brooke does seem very accepting of Jonathon now, I tried to write her as trying to make peace with Jonathon from the start as he has always been an innocent child, obviously this is much easier now she knows he is not Lucas' son. As a mother herself her first instinct is to care for any baby.  
**


	34. Christmas

_I shall always fondly remember the first time I read this book, for it was the moment my life changed. Now almost 7 years later I hope it shall change my life once more. Lucas Scott come what may I shall always love you. I envisage my future with no one but you, with our children and then their children surrounding us. May you never doubt that my heart has always been yours. Will you marry me?_

The will you marry me somehow seemed big than the other words. The book itself was a touching gift, reminding him of the start of what had turned out to be the rest of his life. He was stunned by her words though. He tore his gaze away from the book to study her face. He could see the fear in her face, the nervousness in the way she held herself but most importantly for him the love in her eyes.

"That's a pretty bold move for someone who was told a week ago that I couldn't be with her." She smiled a nervous smile.

"I don't know whether you know but I used to be a pretty bold person, you seemed to like it." She quipped back at him and he grinned.

"One of many things I adore about you." For this had never been about not loving her, while at first glance it may seem like he'd given up on his promise to wait for her, but deep down he knew the truth. He hadn't nor would he ever give up on Brooke Davis. He would still wait until his last breath for her. It was no longer him awaiting her to love him, or to decide their fate. He'd known last week when he told her that he couldn't be with her that he was waiting for something new. He was waiting for her to show she loved him as much as he loved her.

"I love you Lucas Eugene Scott, it's always been you. It will only ever be you. I'm not going to give a big romantic speech because we both know that words are your department. All I'll say is I want the future we planned, even if Jonathon had been your son I'd still want it. I can't imagine there being a day I could survive without you. You and our children are my world." He reached across the divide and placed a hand over her clasped hands.

"I love you too Brooke Davis…" her head had dropped and his hand rose from hers to place a finger beneath her chin tilting her head so he could look into her eyes. "…soon to be Scott." He grinned at her and she seemed frozen for a minute, before she leaped into his lap, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck pressing her lips to his. His arms slide round her pulling her closer to him. He never wanted to let her go. As she pulled away leaving them both breathless she smiled.

"I think Lauren might well explode in the morning, all the presents and the two things she's wished for all year, us getting married and getting a baby brother or sister." His hand reached up to cup her cheek and she nuzzled into it.

"Well in which case I'm in danger of exploding too. All you seem to have left for me to ask is when do we move in?" she let her forehead rest against his and smiled deeper.

"Now." He lifting his head the inch needed to press his lips to hers again. Only parting as he felt her shiver.

"Let's go inside, I told you it was too cold out here for you two." She slipped from his lap and took his hand as they slipped back inside. She turned back to wait for him as he closed and locked the doors.

"Looks like you've been upgraded from the sofa." He took her into his arms and stared deep into her eyes.

"Promise me we'll always be as happy as we are now." She smiled and softly shook her head.

"I can't." Her hand slid between them resting on her middle. "Because one day soon we'll be happier." He captured her lips in a soft gentle kiss.

"I want to go to sleep with in my arms."

"Then let's go to bed. Santa won't come until we're asleep anyway." She grinned and then began to make her way to the stairs, he trailed after her still holding her hand.

"Santa already gave me everything I asked for." They stood together outside the door to the master bedroom. It had been a long time that he had waited, that they had waited, for the night when they would lay together in the new bed they had purchased in their house with the family they loved around them. Brooke twisted the door knob and the door swung open, revealing the room she had so loving planned over 5 months ago. The pair undressed slowly and pulled back the covers before sliding in together. Brooke curled up on her side and Lucas curled round her, one arm flung over her middle drawing soft circles on their baby's current home.

"I don't ever want to spend another night in another bed, or one without you."

"Pretty girl you'll never have to."

* * *

He softly clicked the door shut and shrugged out of his jacket, he winced as it thudded on the floor, yet it didn't disturb the beauty sleeping in his bed. As he peeled his layers of clothing he watched her in slumber. As soundlessly as he could he slipped in beside her, as if sensing his presence she turned to snuggle into his broad chest and he smiled, slipping an arm around her and dropping a light kiss to her forehead. He checked his watch and saw that it was almost 7 in the morning. Christmas morning. Lauren would be awake soon, full of the excitement only children experience on Christmas. Though he was loathed to do so he knew he had to wake Brooke, there was something he needed to do before the house was the hive of activity he knew it would become. He traced a finger lightly along her arm in an attempt to slowly bring her into consciousness. She shifted and wriggled until his persistence paid off and her eyes slowly opened.

"Hey you." Her voice was low and he could hear the sleep in her words.

"Happy Christmas pretty girl." She smiled back at him.

"It is." Downstairs they could hear the sounds of people moving and he was certain his mom and Keith would be up with the twins. They'd spent the night in what would be Lauren's room, Nathan and Haley were in the guest bedroom soon to be the baby's room, leaving Lauren and Hannah both downstairs in the den and Julian and Jonathon in what was Brooke's study. The sound of a shout alerted them both to the fact Lauren was now awake. Ecstatic that Santa had visited. Brooke made to get out of bed to go down to the chaos and he grabbed her wrist pulling her back to him.

"Before we go anywhere I have something for you. After you were asleep I went to my apartment to get it. My mom gave me this before Peyton showed up. I was planning on giving it to you after the party that night." He rolled over and fumbled with his jeans before rolling back to her and handing her a small black velvet box. "It was my grandmother's." he watched intently as she took the box from his hand and pulled each side open to reveal a platinum ring with a pear shaped sapphire flanked by three princess cut diamonds on either side.

"It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." He gently took the box from her hand, removing the ring from the box. She held her hand out to him and he slipped the ring on her finger.

"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen, so you deserve a beautiful ring." As he leaned in to kiss her the moment was destroyed by the hollow of his brother.

"Brooke your daughter is ready to open presents!" he sighed and shook his head before they both got up, wrapped their robes around them and made their way to the rest of the family downstairs. Deb had already arrived by some miracle. Lucas couldn't fathom why anyone would want to leave the house this early. Lucas flopped back onto the couch beside Julian who was feeding Jonathon. Keith was sat in the armchair holding Lily while Nathan had Leo in the other armchair. Haley was the other side of Julian with a squirming Hannah on her knee. As soon as Lucas sat Lauren was in his lap begging to open presents. Karen was in the kitchen, no doubt tending to the food. She came in and settled down on the arm of the chair in which Keith sat. Brooke knelt beside the tree and began sifting through the presents. She handed one to Lauren who happily tore through the paper while everyone watched.

"The Barbie hair salon!" Her shriek Lucas was sure almost deafened him. Brooke laughed and turned to the next present in her hands, passing it over to Hannah. Before the girl, who had little concept of what was actually happening could even begin to tear open the paper her mother cried out.

"What on earth is that giant thing on your hand Brooke Davis?!" Brooke looked across at him and he grinned from ear to ear giving his head a slight nod.

"Well I may have given Lucas an early Christmas present last night. I gave him a copy of The Winter of Our Discontent, for those of you who don't know it's the book he made me read in high school before he'd go out with me. In it I asked him to marry me. By the time I woke up this morning he'd been and got the ring he'd been planning on giving me before all the drama. Sooooo the giant thing on my hand is my engagement ring. Lucas and I are getting married." Complete silence fell across the room as everyone tried to process the information. Lauren twisted to look up into her father's face.

"Does that mean mommy will get to dress up like a princess like grandma Karen did, and you'll have a party and then we all get to live together?"

"It sure does baby girl." The grin that came across her face almost split her face in two. Her arms flew tight round Lucas' neck for barely a minute before she was bounding over to her mother, the force of her hug almost sending Brooke backwards into the Christmas tree. As Lauren pulled back from hugging her mother she said, "Santa got me what I asked for momma." Brooke's gaze rose to his and he smiled. Finally the others came back to life as Haley unceremoniously left her daughter on the sofa and flew into Brooke's arms, as much as a woman weeks away from giving birth could fly, and enveloped her into a bone crushing hug. Nathan was the first to reach across the divide between him and Lucas and offer his hand to his brother.

"Congratulations man!"

* * *

The room resembled a bomb site with bright coloured but now torn paper littering every surface for as far as the eye could see it left Lucas and Brooke with just one more gift for their daughter. Julian had gone to change Jonathon and Brooke slipped onto the sofa beside Lucas who wrapped an arm round her shoulders. Lauren was knelt on the floor gazing up at her parents with utmost attention.

"Where's my present momma?"

"Well honey daddy and I tried to make sure your present was here for Christmas but unfortunately it's going to be a few months late." Lauren looked so disappointed.

"Mommy and I decided that since you'd been so good we'd give you what you've been asking for – a baby brother or sister." The squeal of excitement provided to everyone how delighted Lauren was with the events of that Christmas morning. Lucas shook his head at his daughter dancing around the room, presents forgotten in the delight of being given the family he knew she'd craved since he'd appeared in her life over 18 months ago. As the girls kept watch over the children, guiding Julian in how to hold, play and care for his son Keith prepared the table for dinner while Deb helped Karen in the kitchen. Lucas and Nate began to mammoth task of clearing the mess from the living room.

"So it's a big turn around in a week big brother." Lucas looked up from stuffing paper into the black bag.

"Not really, loving each other was never the problem. I just needed her to show me she loved me and she did. I haven't told her this yet but there's one last present for her. I figured if she's really going to make a go of her own fashion boutique then that bedroom she's planning on using for a study isn't big enough. So I'm having the attic made into a studio for her. I always knew we'd get here Nate." Nathan shook his head.

"Took you guys long enough. I mean she's only been in love with you for 7 years." He regretted his actions a teenager greatly, even to this day. The hurt he'd caused her and the years of pain and loneliness she'd suffered. The sacrifices she'd made while he had lived his life as a normal teenager plagued him. He just wanted to give her everything she could ever want now. The room was cleared and everyone was now dressed in order to sit down to the lavish meal Karen had prepared them all. The chatter was almost deafening and Lucas sat back in his chair just watching the people he loved, old dear friends and new ones. Every so often as she passed bowls of food or moved her hands when speaking the light would catch the ring on Brooke's hand creating a sparkle that caused him to smile. This Christmas would undoubtedly remain one of the best he would ever have. The day in which everything fell into place.


	35. New Year, New Life

**Firstly, thank you to everyone who reviews and reads this fic it does mean a lot and keeps me going. Secondly I apologise it's been a while but hey busy time of year. I did want to post two chapters as a Christmas present to you all but it's looking like there may only be this one slightly longer one unless I get an hour or so tomorrow. Thirdly I'm not sure how the hospital process works when giving birth in America but this is more or less my labour with my son so it is still an accurate labour even if some things are a bit different here than America.**

**And finally Happy Christmas to you all.**

Brooke turned as she heard the deep and heavy sigh, expecting to be confronted by two sweaty, exhausted Scott men. Today it was FINALLY happening. She, Lucas and Lauren were moving into their home – for keeps this time. Not just for Christmas with the family, not in the hopes of a future but actually doing it. The excitement within her constantly bubbled just beneath the surface, moving into their house, in just 6 weeks time they'd be having a baby, and only 2 short months after that she'd take vows to become Mrs Lucas Scott. She'd instructed the men to bring in Lucas' couch to place it in the den. Each time either Lucas, Nathan, Julian or Keith began to complain about the heavy furniture Brooke was quick to point out how little they were actually having to move. The majority of the furniture had been chosen and delivered months ago, before Peyton's arrival. The main living area of the house and the dining area had the key items, leaving the furniture from Lucas' apartment to go in the den. Their new bed had arrived months ago – slept in for the first time Christmas Eve as a newly engaged couple. Lauren's room was the one in which most of the furniture was needed in. Her bed, and the wardrobes she had once shared with her mother were all coming from Karen's house. Of course there was the addition of the necessary items Brooke had purchased for the baby's room. And then not forgetting that once their house was completed Lucas and Nathan had promised to help Keith convert Brooke and Lauren's old room into a room for the twins. Karen was currently at home with the twins, along with Lauren, Hannah and Jonathon. Thankfully Deb was there also – and Haley though at this stage there was little she could do to help out. Or at least Brooke had believed Haley was there, instead as she turned at the heavy sigh she found a very large, angry looking Haley staring at her.

"I swear to you now that Nathan is having the snip before he comes anywhere near me again!" Haley was currently nine days past her due date and counting. To say she was frustrated would be the understatement of the century. Brooke slipped an arm round her friend and manoeuvred her into the lounge and onto the sofa.

"You want some decaff tea honey?"

"No. I want this damn baby out of me. Honestly Brooke what is it with my kids, Hannah scared the crap out of me by being so early, and this one is perfectly content to stay in there until he or she is like 40!" Brooke tried desperately hard not to laugh, it wouldn't be what Haley needed right now.

"What did the doctor say?"

"I have to go have something called a membrane sweep later today – apparently there's a 50/50 chance it will start labour. If it doesn't then they'll wait until Tuesday, if no baby by then I have to be induced. I got all the pamphlets on it Brooke and I don't want to be. I want to have a normal birth, I never got that with Hannah." Haley let out an aggravated scream before gently pounding on her swollen abdomen. "Come on baby get out." Brooke rubbed a hand soothingly in circles on Haley's back. Haley sighed and fell back into the couch defeated.

"I know its hard Hales, but you'll forget all this as soon as the baby is here. Come what may this time next week you'll have a little baby to hold."

"I just feel enormous and it's hard because Hannah doesn't understand why mommy is so big and why she can't do the things she usually does. At least Lauren is old enough to have it explained to her." Brooke laughed.

"Look on the bright side, you've not spent the last few weeks constantly being asked when the baby will be here. I think Lauren's more excited than either Lucas or I." Haley shook her head in amazement.

"I don't think anyone could be more exciter or happier than Lucas is right now. For a long time we all thought this wouldn't actually happen. I think he'd resigned himself to the fact he was going to be a weekend dad to both his children. Now he gets to be the father he always wanted to be. I remember growing up he'd tell me all about what kind of dad he'd be when he had his own kids. All courtesy of the Dan Scott school of what not to do."

"I'm happier than I ever been, but I'm also more scared than ever. It feels like everything is perfect. But no one ever gets perfect do they?"

"Brooke if anyone deserves perfect then it's you guys. But you're right nothing is ever perfect. It took Keith like 20 years to get the family he wanted, and now they twins which is great but chaos. Nathan and I went through hell at the beginning, then again with his injury, the worry when Hannah was born. Our life is wonderful, but it's not perfect Brooke. We have friction and fights and days where we can't stand each other. Things go wrong and we worry and stress. It's not perfect, bad stuff still happens but its close. That's what you guys have, the Peyton drama, Lauren's birth, the years apart, the exposure of the truth, her illness, the struggle to accept how you felt, the Peyton drama. They're just problems, I know right now everything is wonderful and it won't stay that way you're right. But it's not scary Brooke. It's just life and sometimes like now it's perfect and sometimes it's a struggle, but it's worth it."

"Yeah it is Haley, just like all the drama over little Mr, or Miss, late arrival is worth it – in the end." Haley shook her head and rolled her eyes at her friend.

"I shot myself in the foot there didn't I?" Brooke giggled.

"A little bit. Maybe your baby is just waiting so we can give birth at the same time." Haley snorted at Brooke's comment.

"No way in hell is this baby staying in there for another 6 weeks!"

* * *

"Oh my god. I cannot believe after the day I had you made me get Lauren to bed, that's just cruel! She's so totally hyper right now, it took me eleven stories to get her to sleep. Eleven Brooke! For the first 4 she was still jumping around the room." Lucas groaned as he flopped back onto the bed beside Brooke who laid her sketchpad on the bedside chest as Lucas lay his head on her chest. She idly stroked his hair.

"I know babe that's why you had to do it. I'm way too big and pregnant to be dealing with a crazed six year old right now." Lucas tilted his head to be able to look at her face and she grinned down at him.

"That excuse is going to be used a lot over the next six weeks isn't it?" Brooke nodded and beamed down at him, her dimples showing. "It's a good thing I love you Brooke Davis soon to be Scott." She couldn't wait for the day they could drop the Davis soon to be and just call her Brooke Scott. She still found it difficult to believe that day would be in just over 3 months time. It was barely even a month ago they'd gotten engaged. Brooke had wondered whether Karen would combust when they'd told her that they'd set the date for the wedding to be May 8th. Karen had grumbled that they were giving her just 5 months notice to prepare everything, insisting that neither Brooke or Lucas, or even maid of honour Haley would be of any use to her since they'd all be preoccupied with new offspring, as if Karen herself wasn't. Brooke was well aware of the fact it seemed incredibly quick. But truth was she didn't want a big flashy wedding. She and Lucas had both decided that they wanted a very small wedding, with just their very close friends and family. A simple beach wedding, with a reception that was only going to cater for a slightly larger group than the wedding party. In fact Brooke had been tempted to suggest just having a small gathering at their house following the ceremony but felt she'd be pushing Karen a little too far. Karen wanted to give them the perfect day. But for Brooke the days of big fancy weddings were long gone – just like her errant family. She didn't want that emphasised. She loved her family as it was – but truth be told if they went traditional almost everyone they knew would be on Lucas' side of the church. There was one thought in particular that was plaguing her and she decided to just jump in and talk to Lucas about it.

"Luke, have you decided on a best man yet?"

"I would have thought that was obvious." He replied not even bothering to open his eyes to look at her.

"I guess so." She tried to stop the wistful tone in her voice but didn't quite manage it. His eyes opened then.

"What's wrong, you don't like the idea of Keith being best man?"

"It's not that Luke, I just…Keith and your mom are like my family too. I just…he can't be in two places at once and I just thought…it doesn't matter I'm being crazy. Forget I said anything." She shook her head an averted her gaze, but that just made him sit up to look at her properly.

"Brooke why does Keith need to be in two places?"

"Luke, at our wedding your mom will be there, your uncle will be there, your brother will be there, your childhood friends will be there. Apart from Rachel everyone that's going to be there are yours."

"Brooke they're ours, our friends and family."

"They were yours first. I don't really have anyone Luke, certainly no…no one to walk me down the aisle." He pulled her into his embrace and she let her body mould to his.

"Brooke I don't think it matters who knew them first, they love us both, we love them all. But as you said I have my childhood friends coming, and traditionally I would ask one of them to best man, I'm sure that Keith would be honoured to give you away. I don't think he cares who he stands next to as long as it's one of us." She felt the tears prickling her eyes and twisted her face to look at him. One hand slipped up to cup his cheek as she pressed her lips against his.

"I love you Lucas Scott."

"I love you too Broo…" He was cut off by the phone ringing and she laughed at the way he dived on it. The time he'd spent putting Lauren to bed she wasn't surprised he didn't want her waking. "Hello? Where's Deb? It's not a problem Nate. Bye."

"Is something wrong?"

"Haley's in labour. Deb's gone on a date and left her cell at home so they can't contact her. Nathan wanted to know if he could bring Hannah over here. He should be here any second I think they were already in the car."

"He's detouring here and she's in labour?" Lucas laughed at her.

"Brooke they live about 2 minutes from here, it's not out the way and I'm pretty sure if Haley couldn't last she'd be telling him." Brooke shrugged and shuffled to the edge of the bed, using her hands to push herself into a standing position. She began to make her way down the stairs and Lucas followed. The sound of a car pulling up sent Lucas to the door, ensuring it was open as Nathan stepped onto the porch cradling Hannah who was half-asleep. Lucas opened his arms wide and accepted the little girl from his brother.

"Brooke, Hales said is there any possible way you could come with us because apparently I was of little to no use last time." Lucas looked horrified at the words Haley had given to Nathan. Brooke merely laughed and placed a sympathetic hand on Nathan's arm.

"Sure I can Nate, and just know you could be the most amazing man in the world but unless you pushed a baby out of a hole the size of your nostril you aren't in the best position to help her." Brooke turned and grabbed her coat following Nathan out to the car. As she slipped inside the car on the backseat beside Haley she caught a look at Lucas' bewildered face and smiled reassuringly before turning her attention to Haley.

"Thank god you're coming with us." Brooke gripped Haley's hand and smiled soothingly.

"How far apart are your contractions?"

"About 3 minutes now."

"Have your waters broken?" Haley shook her head and Brooke smiled. "Then there's nothing to worry about. You'll be at the hospital and pumped full of drugs in no time." Brooke wasn't entirely sure that the best thing for her right now was such a vivid reminder of just how painful labour was. It had been six years since she'd had first hand experience and clearly as she watched Haley now she'd forgotten just how intense it could be. As Nathan pulled into the car park Brooke had her door open. Both she and Nathan supported Haley was they went inside the maternity unit. As they were buzzing in through the security door a midwife was there to greet them and usher them into a delivery suite.

"Mrs Scott once you're settled on the bed I'd just like to examine you and see how far dilated you are. I checked your notes after your husband called and I see you had a membrane sweep. Now they can create a fair bit of pain similar to contractions so it may be the case that things haven't progressed quite as much as you think they have." Brooke wanted to punch the woman so had no idea how Haley was feeling.

"I want drugs!" So that was how Haley was feeling. As the midwife examined Haley Brooke just held her hand tight. Nathan looked to be a wreck beside her and she wondered how he'd gotten through this experience the first time.

"Ok then Mrs Scott, at this point I'm afraid I can't give you any pain relief. You're just 3cm dilated and so anything at this stage may well halt labour – which obviously we don't want." Haley managed to swear between her panting before demanding drugs.

"It wasn't a problem last time you were practically giving them out like sweets!" The midwife smiled at her.

"Well given the circumstances of your last labour Mrs Scott we weren't concerned about labour being halted. But given the fact you're already overdue as it is we wouldn't want to stop any progress." Brooke felt a tug on her hand as Haley tried to get herself into a more upright position, more than likely to lash out at the woman.

"Haley, this nice lady here is going to run you a warm bath and we'll get you in it. That'll make the pain easier and then before you know if she'll have some pain relief all ready for you." Haley turned to her and Brooke noticed for the first time how unwell she was looking.

"I think I'm going to be sick." The midwife left to retrieve a sick tray, before she returned Haley jerked forward, grabbing the blankets Brooke huddled them around her as Haley vomited. Brooke felt decidedly nauseous herself at the sight of it and tried not to let her panic show as she witnessed what was coming from Haley. As Haley relaxed back she grinned. "I guess I shouldn't have had chocolate pudding for dessert." Brooke felt immediately better knowing that there was nothing seriously wrong with Haley. The midwife returned and then disappeared again immediately to get some clean sheets. Nathan escaped to the bathroom to prepare the bath for Haley. By the time the midwife returned Brooke was able to inform her that on every fourth contraction Haley was vomiting. The sheets were discarded as the midwife disappeared yet again to retrieve some anti-sickness medication, which Haley managed to keep down for about a minute. As Brooke and Nathan helped Haley into the bath the midwife returned with a needle ready to inject Haley with medication to stop the sickness, which by now had reached such severe levels she was bringing up just bile. As each contraction hit Haley groaned and Brooke and Nathan hung outside the door.

"I hate seeing her in so much pain. I feel so helpless Brooke."

"Nathan it's one day, a few hours and then she'll be the happiest woman on the planet. Trust me in 24 hours time this will be forgotten, well not forgotten. But the pain will be." By the time the water had cooled enough for Haley to want to get out of the bath it had reached 1a.m. As the midwife checked Haley and informed her she was now at 6cm all three were relieved to hear she could now be given pethadine. It didn't take long for the pethadine to kick in and Haley seemed to fall into a fitful sleep. Nathan took the hard plastic chair to sit beside her, holding her hand and stroking her hair while Brooke was left with the recliner. She felt herself slip in and out of consciousness. At some point in the early hours the midwife gave Haley another shot of pethadine and she went straight back to sleep. By which time baby Scott was wide awake and kicking Brooke's bladder like it was a soccer ball. As Brooke exited the bathroom for what felt like the millionth time the midwife was giving Haley another examination. Brooke's eyes drifted to the clock and she saw it was now 6.30 in the morning.

"Well Mrs Scott it shouldn't be too long now. You're about 9 and a half centimetres." The midwife left and Haley shifted.

"I give up, I need to get up. I need to pee." Nathan helped Haley to her feet and guided her to the bathroom. A few seconds later she shouted out to Nathan. "I'm getting up now can you come in and…" Her voice trailed off and Nathan looked to Brooke worriedly. "I need a midwife, my water just broke." Brooke waddled from the room to get a midwife as Nathan went in to help Haley. When Brooke came back in with two midwives Haley was back on the bed.

"Mrs Scott I'm just going to examine you, this is Nikki and she's just come on shift and she'll be taking over from me. She's going to stay in the room with you now." The midwife paused and then looked back up. "Okay Mrs Scott I'd say you're about ready to push now. Nikki is just going to finish up with me making sure she's totally aware of all your details, so in a minute or two she's going to come over and get you in a comfortable position." Brooke and Nathan positioned themselves either side of Haley as the two midwives conversed for a few seconds before the younger brunette came over. She helped Haley into a more upright position and her legs into the stirrups. By the time this was done the paediatric nurse had arrived with the equipment she needed and a health visitor joined them. Haley pushed valiantly, each time giving more than the last. Despite her cries of being unable to continue.

"Mrs Scott this next push needs to be a big one and then we've got the head, you ready?" As the next contraction hit Brooke and Nathan pushed Haley's legs to her chest as she barred down and pushed. "And we've got a head, you're doing great Mrs Scott, one last push and we've got your baby." Nathan turned to watch as the baby came out, at the last second the baby turned so he was greeted with the baby's buttocks as the midwife handed the baby to the nurse.

"Is it a boy or girl?" Nathan's voice was so filled with emotion it barely came out as more than a whisper. The midwife turned to the nurse.

"They don't know the sex." The nurse turned and smiled at them all as she held the baby up.

"Congratulations on your son."

* * *

As Brooke sipped the cool water she heard someone call her name. she turned to see Lucas walking towards her carrying Hannah in his arms with Lauren skipping ahead.

"Is the baby here, can I see it?" Brooke smiled down at her daughter.

"Him honey, he's a boy." Lucas smiled at her over Lauren's head.

"They have a son?" Brooke nodded and smiled. She didn't feel as exhausted as she should considering she had now been up for almost 30 hours.

"A little boy, 6 pounds 4 ounces born at 8:51 a.m. You coming in, I bet Hannah wants to meet her baby brother." Brooke grinned at the little girl who held her arms out to be taken. Brooke obliged and carried the little girl into Haley's room, followed closely by Lauren and Lucas. Haley was sat cradling her son and Nathan stood when he saw Brooke enter with Hannah and took the little girl from her. As Brooke, Lauren and Lucas watched Nathan approached the bed and allowed Hannah to peek into the bundle of blankets.

"Hannah this is your baby brother – James Lucas Scott." Brooke turned to her future husband and saw the genuine surprise and delight on his face. She was remembered just how happy she'd felt when they'd given Hannah the name Brooke as her middle name. Lauren skipped forward begging for a glimpse of her new baby cousin. Lucas slipped in beside Haley to stare down at the tiny baby. He leant down to kiss her best friend.

"Congratulations Haley." Brooke smiled at her family and ventured further into the room to join them. As Lauren and Hannah played beside the bed and Brooke got her chance to hold baby Jamie she noted Lucas pull his brother to one side and kept one ear to their conversation.

"Congratulations little brother, you never know this might well be the Scott who makes it to the NBA." Nathan grinned and the two shared a quick embrace.

"Your turn soon Luke, nervous?"

"Terrified. It was hard when it was my mom let alone Brooke. The pain I just, feel like it's my fault. And scared that I won't be good enough support for her."

"The fact you're here is enough for her."

"Thanks man. Nate I need a small favour." Nathan eyed him warily but nodded to allow Lucas to continue. "I'm in the market for a best man, you interested?" A grin broke across Nathan's already happy face and he pulled his older brother in for a hug. As they came closer to the bed once more Nathan had his arm round Lucas' shoulders.

"Hales have you heard how the maid of honour has to have slutty wedding sex with the best man?" Haley gave Nathan a mystified look before grasping what he was saying.

"Well I guess since it's tradition who am I to say no…provided there is a LOT of contraception involved!"


	36. Crazy Girl

**Sorry it's been such a long time since I updated, what with Christmas/New Year and then both my son and I being ill I haven't had much time for writing.**

**I just wanted to say a big thank you to everyone who is still reading and thanks for all the reviews.**

**This chapter doesn't have much of a point but I felt like it was time for some light hearted Brucas fluff.**

Brooke leaned back on the bar stool as she watched Lucas preparing a salad for their lunch.

"You know when we get married we might have to think about changing Lauren's name." Lucas looked up from where he was chopping tomatoes.

"And why is that?" Brooke sighed.

"Well she's going to be a Scott, she really doesn't need the name of Lauren Scott Scott."

"Ahhh." Lucas said while nodding his head in understanding. "So why not just go with Davis Scott." Brooke frowned, a look which was entirely missed by Lucas who was now once again intent on the task at hand.

"I want to forget all things Davis. They're a part of it anymore, of me or my daughter. So anyway – I was thinking how about Lauren Karen Scott. I mean obviously Lauren would need to be asked her opinion. But what do you think?"

"I think my mom would love it."

"Your mom has been the rock that has kept me going, kept Lauren alive some of the time when I think back to just how clueless I was at the start, I just want her to know that even though we have you now and we're all moving on she's still as important to me and Lauren as she ever was." Lucas looked over at her again.

"She knows Brooke. I know she has the twins now but I'm still her first son and you're her first daughter."

"I wish she was my mom for real." Lucas looked at Brooke panicked and it took a moment of two for her to realise the implications of what she'd said. "No that's disgusting I take that back!" The pair laughed as Brooke shook her head to mentally clear the thoughts from her mind. As Lucas continued to chop Brooke continued to trawl back in her mind, going back further than remembering the tower of strength Karen had been for her. "Hey Broody," Lucas looked at her and she winked both recognising the use of the long forgotten nickname, "did you ever think that when I took you to that bar got you drunk and tattooed that we'd end up here?"

"Two months ago I didn't think we'd end up here Brooke, you may have changed but you're still unpredictable." Silence descended as Brooke was left to ponder what Lucas had said. The last 6 years of her life had brought about a change in her, a huge change and she knew she'd never be the girl who'd done all those crazy things again. She didn't regret the choices that led her here still she sometimes forgot that she was just 23 years old, apart from Haley and Nathan she didn't think she'd be able to name anyone her age that lived the serious life she did. Lucas had convinced her not to return to the café after she'd had the baby. He reasoned that if his mother had managed to let go and find someone capable of running the place then there was little doubt Brooke could afford to leave completely. They certainly didn't need the money. He'd just received the advance for his next novel, the money he got from coaching alongside Nathan alone covered the money she made from the café and he reasoned she'd have more time to realise her own dream as well as be a mother. Brooke for her part knew that the café wouldn't be the same without Karen there, and Haley certainly wouldn't be picking up spare shifts when they were busy during weekends and school breaks now she had two children. Her life was certainly becoming less of a strain, and having the man she loved beside her brought her joy that she just couldn't find in her child, and she was excited about the prospect of having her own clothing store. But she wasn't thinking about any of that right now, right now she was preoccupied with thoughts of everything she'd given up, or the things she'd missed – of the girl she was.

"Do you miss the old Brooke?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean the girl who stripped naked in your car, who made you step out your box." Lucas finally laid the knife to rest so he could move round the counter to Brooke. He looked earnestly into her eyes and took her hands in his.

"Brooke I loved that girl, she was crazy and impulsive and had this love of life and need to live each second. And I love the woman she became even more, because that woman became an amazingly strong person who has such courage and loyalty, that woman is so beautiful and yet she doesn't even realise it, she is sexy without trying, without stripping naked in my car she can turn me on more I thought possible, she is the best mother I could ever want for my children, she will be the wife I always wanted. And she's as unpredictable as she ever was. Brooke you grew up really fast, but you didn't change. You're still that crazy girl, but there was always more to you than her. You just never let anyone see that. The difference between the girl you were and the woman you are is just that you let people see all the other great things about you. That crazy girl wanted everyone to see her as one-dimensional because she was hiding, but this amazing woman is so much more stunning three-dimensional."

"That's why I love you Lucas Scott, you always have the right words." She grinned at him. He kissed her forehead and went to return to the job at hand. She kept tight hold of his hand and he turned back to her.

"Let's go to the beach." He frowned.

"Brooke it's the beginning of February, it's like 45 degrees out." She shrugged and grinned. He laughed and shook his head at her. "What about lunch?"

"Who cares! Come on." With that she was shooting off, as fast as she could given her size, to grab her coat and disappear out to the car. Lucas followed her grinning.

* * *

Brooke screamed as the freezing water hit her bare feet and legs and once again Lucas begged her to stop being so insane and to put her socks and shoes back on.

"Come on Broody, it's refreshing." She giggled at him in response before screaming as the water hit her again. She felt his strong arms around her scooping her up and away from the next wave and she twisting violently against him.

"Brooke I know you want to have some fun and be crazy again but not this, not standing in freezing cold water. I will do anything else you want to do for the rest of the day." She stopped struggling and grinned wickedly at him as he placed her down on the sand.

"Anything?" She could tell her was now reconsidering his words but knew it was too late. "Ok then Broody, you wait here and I will be back shortly." She left him staring at her retreating form as she pulled on her socks and shoes before leaving the beach. It didn't take her long to get what she wanted and when she returned she found him staring out at the ocean. "Is this beach taken?" He jumped slightly at the sound of her voice but relaxed and smiled when she sat down. She wriggled about for a minute getting comfortable before she reached into the bag that was full of her purchases. She pulled out the two warm burgers and handed him one.

"Eating a burger on the beach? That's your anything? You've gone soft Brooke Davis." He laughed at her. She sharply placed her elbow in his side and he winced.

"This is just food before the anything. The baby was hungry and I figured it would be mean to get us something and not you."

"Well we have to collect Lauren pretty soon."

"Oh no Eugene, it's not that easy. I called your mom and she's taking Lauren for the afternoon – and night." She told him with a wink. Brooke would have been horrified if she'd had twins, she clearly remembered how hard Lauren had been. But Karen just seemed to take it in her stride, she dealt with twins better than some people dealt with just one baby, and the addition of her granddaughter for a day was a pleasure. The pair finished their burgers in silence and once the last mouthful was gone Brooke was on her feet dragging Lucas to his. She began to skip off down the beach and he followed laughing at her as she danced and twirled around. If she was watching a woman who was almost 8 months pregnant do what she was doing she'd be laughing too! It didn't take long for her to become out of breath and to fall into a steady pace beside Lucas, who offered several times to relieve her of the bag she carried but to no avail. She was certain he could not see, touch or hold the contents until they got where they were going. Instead she informed him he'd have to settle for simply holding her hand, which he was more than happy to do. She knew he'd recognised the house she'd stopped in front of and he turned to her questioningly. In response she merely dipped her hand into the bag to retrieve toilet paper and box of eggs.

"Brooke are you crazy? This isn't Halloween and we're not kids." She just laughed at him.

"I know Broody, by the time Halloween rolls around we'll have a baby and a six year old to contend with and we won't ever do anything like this. And as for being kids who cares! It's not like we don't know the owner – and it's not he doesn't deserve it, or that you owe him anything." She knew Lucas would cave, if she gave him 'the look' long enough. Sure enough within minutes the toilet paper was flying and floating around them, the wind spinning it further than she'd imagined getting not just the house of their victim but the neighbouring one as well. Luckily the eggs managed to stay their course hitting just the beach house of Dan Scott. At a loud enraged shout Lucas dropped their supplies and hitched Brooke into his arms running as fast as he could with his precious – but heavy load. Brooke was in hysterics as from her perch she could clearly see Dan coming onto the deck and surveying the damage, by the time he turned to look for the kids who'd damaged his property Brooke and Lucas were far enough down the beach not to be recognised. Lucas stopped to catch his breath and put Brooke down. She immediately set off back the way they'd come.

"Where are you going?" She grinned at him.

"Back to the car." Obviously he'd forgotten that the car was in the other direction when he'd started running. She saw the panic on his face and just laughed more. "He'll think its kids Luke, come on." She grabbed his hand and started walking back towards Dan's beach house. She slowed her pace to a stroll as they got closer and he could hear Dan and his neighbour discussing the mess 'some damn kids' had made of his house and that some of it had got the neighbours. Brooke was trying desperately hard not to laugh and genuinely thought they'd be able to walk behind the pair and to the car without them even noticing. Until Dan turned to gesture up the beach telling the neighbour the way they'd run. She could feel Lucas' fear as Dan finally noticed them.

"Lucas! Brooke!" The pair stopped at Dan and the other man came over to them. "Did you see a couple of kids back that way?" Lucas glanced down at Brooke who saw the terror in his eyes, she managed to erase the hint of laughter from her face before she turned to Dan.

"Er yeah there were some kids, all shouting at two of their friends I think there running towards them. When the two joined the group they all ran." Lucas was tightening his grip on her hand and she was beginning to surprise herself with her self control. Dan's face was turning redder.

"Bloody kids, don't they know I'm the Mayor of this town. They've vandalised my house." Dan gestured towards the beach house.

"Wow Dan that's terrible. Bad parenting I blame, you won't catch our Lauren, or this new baby, doing anything like that when they're older." It was then that Dan seemed to click exactly what he was seeing.

"I heard that you two were back together, that you were having another child. At least you know about this one Lucas." This time it was Brooke's turn to squeeze Luke's hand at the blatant jibe at their past.

"Yes Dan obviously I do know, we're very happy thanks for asking. And we're getting married soon. Don't worry your invite hasn't got lost in the mail – we just didn't invite you." Lucas said through gritted teeth before beginning to walk away with Brooke following behind.

"Will Peyton and your other child be there?" Lucas continued to walk away but Brooke tore her hand from his and turned back to Dan.

"His other child, our daughter will be there. The only children either of us have are with each other. But if you're so concerned with the guest list your ex wife, your other son and his wife and children will be there, as will your brother and his wife – the lost love of yours, and their children. Have a nice day Dan." She caught up with Lucas and they walked away with just a muttered 'jackass' under her breath.

"I'm really glad we egged his house." Brooke burst into laughter at Lucas' comment and the two wrapped an arm around the other as they made their way back to the car.


	37. The Cloud and the Silver Lining

He smiled at the beauty by his side before once again focusing on the stream of children exiting the school, searching for his daughter's face.

"Luke I…" Brooke's voice trailed off as he hand slipped from his and he turned in time to catch her before she hit the ground.

"Mommy?" Luke tore his gaze away from his unconscious fiancée to his terrified daughter.

"Lauren go inside, go back to Miss Rhodes – now!" The terrified girl continued to stare at her mother. "Lauren." The sharpness of his tone sent her scurrying back into the school. "Brooke, baby wake up."

"Mr Scott, I've called the paramedics." He looked up to find Miss Rhodes Lauren's teacher standing over him holding a blanket out to him. He took it from her wrapping it around Brooke's still form. "Lauren's with the school nurse, she was very upset so I thought it best. Is there anything else you need that I can…" The woman trailed off he was sure because she knew that there was nothing she or he could do.

"Could you, could Lauren stay here…I can call my brother and get him to…"

"Don't worry Mr Scott, Mrs Scott's details are on file in the office I'm sure I can reach her or her husband at home and Lauren will be fine with me until he comes." Lucas had forgotten the school would have Nathan and Haley's number on Haley's personnel file. He heard the siren and felt the presence of men standing over him. He gently eased her from his arms and over to the paramedics.

"What's her name?"

"Brooke, Brooke Davis."

"And how many weeks is she sir?"

"Um I don't know exactly, she's um over 37 – just. She just collapsed. She was fine when we got here, we walked here was that wrong?"

"Sir we just need to get her to the hospital." He watched helplessly as they loaded her into the ambulance, with one last reassurance from the teacher than Lauren would be fine he climbed in after her. Perched next to Brooke he gripped her hand.

"Brooke, sweetie wake up….please." the journey to the hospital felt like it lasted a lifetime and he felt so useless as she was wheeled away from him. Left alone in the hospital he sank back into a chair and cried, the fear that something would take her and their baby away from him devastating.

"Luke?" He quickly brushed the tears away before looking up as the brunette man jogged towards him. He unashamedly went into the strong arms that were held out to him. "What happened?"

"I don't know, she was fine. She said she wanted some air so we should walk to get Lauren from school. Maybe that was a sign she wasn't well, she just said she'd been stuck in the house all day. Maybe I should have said no."

"Luke this is not because she walked to Lauren's school. She will be okay, the pregnancy has been tough on her from the start, but she is a fighter. She has everything she wants you think she's going to leave that now when it's finally perfect."

"Uncle Keith I just…" Lucas couldn't continue as once again the desire to cry overcame him. He composed himself within a minute and pulled away from the man who was in all the ways that counted his father. "How did you know we were here?"

"Nathan called on his way to get Lauren. He wanted to come himself but obviously he needed to be with Lauren, Haley and the kids. Your mom will be here as soon as Deb arrives to watch the twins."

"Is someone here for Brooke Davis?" Lucas turned and marched to the doctor.

"She's my fiancée, is she okay? What about the baby?"

"Brooke is awake now and I'd like to discuss this with you both there." Keith patted his back as he went off with the doctor. As he walked through the door into her room and saw her laid in the bed looking so pale and ill his heart lurched. He rushed to her and wrapped his arms around her.

"Please don't scare me like that pretty girl."

"Lauren?"

"Yeah she saw, but she's with Nate and Hales." The doctor came further into the room and Lucas sat in the chair beside the bed holding Brooke's hand.

"Miss Davis you passed out due to a spike in your blood pressure. Now your blood pressure is quite high and there appears to be protein in your urine, now it would suggest you have pre-eclampsia. Due to you not having any other symptoms it's likely it's a mild case. However the only cure is to deliver the baby. Now at over 37 weeks you are considered as being full term so there is no chance of any harm to the baby if we induce labour, which is what we think is necessary. To continue further may increase the chances of you becoming more severely affected."

"But once the baby's here she'll be fine?"

"Yes she will."

"And there's no risk for inducing labour?"

"There are no greater risks with an induced labour than a natural one."

"Okay then."

"Very well Miss Davis, now you'll be given a pessary which hopefully will begin contractions, if this fails to occur after 7 hours then another pessary will be administered. I'd like to get things underway as soon as we can so if it's okay with you we'll administer the first pessary in an hour." With that said the doctor left them.

"Luke you need to go home and get the hospital bag. And make sure you go to Haley's and tell Lauren I'm okay and she'll be a big sister soon."

"Brooke I want to be here." She shook her head.

"No Luke, Lauren needs to hear from you that I am okay and I need that bag so you need to go. You won't miss it. I might get another one in 7 hours, you're not going to miss the birth I promise. Now go on."

* * *

Lucas paced about the small room, unable to deal with the pain Brooke was in. it's was almost ten and she was due to be checked to see if another pessary was needed in five minutes. She'd been experiencing pain for almost 4 hours now and Lucas was wondering why any woman would do this more than once.

"Okay then Miss Davis, how are you doing?" The midwife asked cheerily as she came in.

"The pain is coming every ten minutes, and lasts for around a minute."

"Well I'll just see how things are." The midwife checked Brooke out and Lucas was praying she'd inform them Brooke was well on her way. "Miss Davis I think the pains must be due to the pessary as you're not dilating at all yet. Now if the pains are as regular as you say than it's wise not to administer another pessary just yet. I'll check you again around 5am so you should try and get some sleep." The midwife left the room, leaving them both feeling deflated.

"Sit down Luke, that chair reclines." He followed Brooke's instructions and reclined the chair in the corner.

"Holy crap!" Brooke cast her gaze over to him as he struggled to stand. "When it reclines the back goes up and the bottom shifts down leaving a gap your ass falls through!" The sound of her laughter was worth the uncomfortable feeling of being stuck in that chair. As he cast his gaze up at the clock he saw it was approaching 11:30 and he still was not asleep, thankfully Brooke seemed to have settled slightly. The next thing he knew Brooke was calling his name and it was midnight.

"Luke my water broke." He shot up and out the door to bring the midwife in. the lights went on as she examined Brooke.

"Well you're still not dilating and there are still no contractions. We best get you cleaned up and dry and then try and get some more sleep." The midwife disappeared and returned with clean sheets. Lucas helped Brooke into the bathroom while the sheets were changed and showered her down before slipping a clean man's t-shirt over her head and helping her back to bed.

* * *

"The baby seems to be getting a little distressed now. I think we really need to get things moving." It was now 2 in the afternoon and due to Brooke's waters having broken in the night they'd not been able to administer another pessary, meaning that despite her waters having broke, which put the baby at risk of infection there were still no real signs of progress. "Brooke we're going to have to put you on a drip to give you something that will bring your contractions on. Now to do that we'll have to give you an epidural."

"Why? I didn't have one with Lauren."

"Because this will mean your contractions come on so hard and fast your body won't have time to get used to them, it's just too painful without the epidural. Now the anaesthetist has been paged and will be here soon to give you the epidural." Her scared eyes locked on his.

"I'm afraid of needles." He held her hand in his.

"It's going to be okay. Just one Brooke and then we'll have our baby before you know it." Lucas wasn't about to admit to his terrified, quivering fiancée that the needle that was behind her being preparing to be placed in her back was the biggest he'd seen in his life. She sat on the edge of the bed as he held both her hands, the midwife trying to calm her down and stop her shaking so there was less chance of anything going wrong.

"You've done really well Miss Davis, I've got everything ready. I'm just going to administer the epidural now and then the midwife will get you hooked up to the drip." As Brooke was eased back onto the bed and the drip inserted into her arm Lucas kept reassuring her, telling her how proud he was of her and how well she was doing. It was barely half an hour after the drip had been inserted that Brooke's contractions started, within the hour she was fully dilated and ready to push. Her cries and telling him how she couldn't push anymore broke his heart and he swore after this he'd never ask for another child. That despite always having wanted 3 or 4 children that after witnessing just what she had to go through that he'd never ask it of her again.

"You have a daughter. Congratulations." And like that it was the end and the beginning all wrapped into one. The room was a hive of activity as Brooke and the baby were checked and cleaned, the room cleaned and he looked on. To Lucas it felt like he stayed stock still as the room buzzed around him, until Brooke was laid on a pristine bed, with a beautiful baby in her arms and a smile lighting up her face, and the three of them were the only ones there.

"So Luke, you got to here this time. So how was it?" She beamed up at him.

"I think two children is perfect and I think you're the bravest person I know for doing this again." She laughed and shook her head.

"I think when we try for the boy I'll go back to Team Lauren for the delivery."

"Try for a boy? You'd do this again?"

"Maybe not soon, but yes Luke. I'd consider it. Now how would you like hold your daughter?" She edged over to allow him room on the bed next to her and as he settled beside her she handed their new baby over to him. Nothing could prepare him for the rush of emotion as the tiny bundle was placed in his arms.

"I feel like I'm going to break her. Why didn't it feel like this with Jamie?" Brooke laughed at him once more.

"Because she's yours. You have to protect her and keep her safe and it's scarier. So Broody, since I did the first one – you got a name for her?"

"How about, Emily?"

"And which famous are you naming our daughter after?"

"Emily Dickinson. She was a poet."

"Em, Emily Scott, Emily Haley Scott."


	38. The Start of Something

**Apologies for the long time in updated but I've been swamped with my degree.**

**I just wanted to respond to some of the reviews, in answer the question of the age of Brooke and Lucas, they are roughly 23/24 years of age – so yes plenty of time for there to be more children. My decision for the baby to be a girl was not a reflection of any thought that Brooke must only have girls.**

**I have a sequel planned to this fic set quite a few years in the future, and for certain aspects of that story to work this baby had to be a girl. I actually didn't realise there were such strong feelings for the sex of the baby and I apologise to those of you who were disappointed.**

**Also to Nikki, I never said that you can't have an epidural without a drip, but rather the other way around. I was my friend's birthing partner and she went through having an induced labour and in order for the drip that would start her contractions she HAD to have the epidural first. And secondly it is a scoop of formula for every ounce of water; I've only just finishing feeding my son so of this I'm sure.**

**Anyway thank you for all the reviews regardless, I do appreciate them all both positive and negative as I do try and improve my writing based upon them.**

The sound of her daughter's shrill cry caused Brooke to drop the bottle in her hand. She quickly bent and scooped it up before rushing over to the bassinet in which her baby lay. Small finger marks on the distressed child's leg were clearly visible to Brooke whose mind processed the implications while cradling her one month old close to her. After soothing the child a little she settled herself into the couch to feed Emily the bottle she'd prepared. There was a gentle knock on her door but before she'd even considered getting up she heard it open, followed by the sound of tiny feet running towards her. Hannah came into the room babbling something that resembled the word cookie closely followed by Haley with Jamie in a carrier strapped to her front.

"Hey, I figured we'd walk since it was such a nice day – boy is she quick now." Brooke laughed, obviously Haley's pleasant stroll idea had been shattered by the girl who wanted nothing more than to reach her destination to have the detested reins taken off. As Haley removed Hannah's reins and coat Brooke moved to the stairs to call Lauren down. By the time she was back Haley and Jamie were both coatless. The two month old was placed on Emily's floor mat and Haley flicked the switch to start the music and the lights. Once burped Brooke laid Emily next to her cousin.

"Coffee?" Haley nodded and she disappeared to make them both a drink. As she went back into the room she noted her daughter had settled into the sofa with her baby cousin on her lap. The smile was unmissible and it hurt Brooke somewhat to see it. Hannah began to mither her cousin desperate for her attention. Haley removed her son from Lauren's lap and the two girls tore off heading to Lauren's room.

"Make sure you help Hannah up the stairs Lauren sweetheart." Haley called after them.

"I will do Aunt Haley!" Came the yell back. Brooke passed Haley her coffee once Jamie was once again settled on the play mat.

"Hannah adores her, I honestly think she'll say Lauren before mommy or daddy."

"Lauren adores her too – and Jamie." The wistfulness in Brooke's voice said what her words didn't.

"Is she still not taking any interest in Emily?" Brooke sighed deeply.

"I can't say for sure but before you got here Emily was screaming and she had a mark on her leg – like she'd been pinched."

"You think Lauren did that?" Brooke shrugged unsure what was going on with her daughter, the sweet girl who adored her younger cousins and baby aunt and uncle. "But she asked you guys for a brother or sister. And she's so good with Jamie."

"I know, I've had the same thought. Maybe the reality of a baby being here ALL the time isn't what she imagined. I don't know Haley."

"But you guys lived with the twins when they were first born. Surely it's not that different from that." Brooke knew Haley was right, but she couldn't think of another possible reason for her daughter being so hostile with the baby sister she'd wanted so badly and had been so delighted to first meet. It was something that was bothering her more and more with each passing day. But decided to make the most of her friend's company she shoved the thought to the back of her mind.

"I heard from Julian yesterday, apparently Jonathon is doing really well. He sounds very much the devoted and extremely able father now." Brooke was glad that Julian stayed in touch, given the terrible way she'd been introduced to Jonathon she had developed a liking for the baby while Julian had been in Tree Hill seeking their guidance. And for Julian for that matter.

"Has he heard anything more from Peyton?" As a mother Brooke could not understand how on earth Peyton had been able to leave her child.

"He said he'd gotten an e-mail asking if Jonathon was okay, she didn't offer up any details of where she was or what she was doing. Or if she'd be back."

"Even now the whole thing just completely blows my mind. I just can't understand how she could be so conniving and malicious. And then how she could just walk away from her child."

"Sometimes I think maybe we're to blame. After Lucas left you shouldn't became my best friend, when before that you and I had nothing in common whereas the two of you did. She was always an outsider because I could never really forgive her. Yet I managed to forgive Lucas. I feel like I helped make her so hateful."

"Brooke it was different. She was your best friend. I think that it's just the way things go that you expected more from her than Lucas. He was a boy you'd dated a few weeks, she'd been your best friend for years. Besides with Luke you guys had a child together so you couldn't hate him, plus there'd been such a long time to deal with your feelings whereas Peyton was always there everyday. But no matter what we did or didn't do or what we should have done it certainly doesn't excuse Peyton's actions." She knew Haley was right, regardless of the past nothing could explain or justify Peyton's actions over the past few months. But the thoughts still managed to plague her that she'd been too hard on her former best friend – especially in comparison to Lucas. He too was just as much at fault as Peyton was and yet he'd escaped relatively unscathed. "Brooke, can we just forget the past. We've all been living in it too long. Between you, me and Karen we have got six beautiful, healthy children. And two happy marriages - and one wedding to plan. A wedding that is just two months away." A smile crept onto her face at that.

"Yes, in two months time I'll join the rest of you in being a Scott. I won't be the odd one out anymore." Haley laughed.

"Sometimes being a Scott isn't all it's cracked up to be. You'll be related to Dan for one thing."

"No I won't, for all intents and purposes Keith is going to be my father-in-law. And my kids grandfather. And it's not just being a Scott, I get goosebumps thinking about being Mrs Lucas Scott."

"Don't you mean Mrs Lucas EUGENE Scott." Haley teased.

"I am not taking on Eugene. What on earth was Karen thinking?"

"I don't know Penelope perhaps your parents can shed some light." Brooke laughed. Truthfully she and Lucas certainly both seemed to have been given some truly awful middle names. The light banter between the friends was interrupted by the door banging open and the two Scott brothers coming into the room. A quick kiss to their respective other halves and the brothers swiftly turned their attention to their offspring. Nathan scooped Jamie into his arms and began to toss him in the air. Haley tutted but didn't bother telling him to stop knowing he'd just ignore her. Lucas held Emily up to look into her face.

"There's the most beautiful baby in the world." He planted a soft kiss on her forehead before settling next to Brooke and blowing raspberries on Emily's stomach.

"How's the team doing?"

"Not too bad, but they'll be doing great when my boy here grows up and becomes a Raven, he'll be better than his old man and uncle put together." Lucas laughed at hus brother.

"No pressure on the kid then Nate."

"You got to dream big to win big." Haley rolled her eyes at her husband.

"Honestly he sounds more and more like Dan everyday." Nathan shuddered.

"Now that is a horrible thought."

"Hey did Brooke tell you what we did to Dan's house when she was pregnant?"

"No."

"Honestly the things she thinks of. Well she decided that…"

* * *

Brooke sighed wearily as she picked up the soft toys on the floor to return them to the toy box. Lucas was settling Emily down while Lauren was brushing her teeth. And then she saw it, sticking out from Lauren's pillow Brooke saw the picture. Lauren had scribbled all over Emily's face in the first picture taken of the four of them as a family when Emily was just a few hours old. As the little girl came into her bedroom to get into her pyjamas she found her mother sat on the edge of her bed with the destroyed picture in her hand. Brooke felt overwhelmed and so lost. She felt angry with her firstborn and tried desperately not to show it as she asked her to come sit beside her. Lauren complied obediently.

"Lauren want to explain this picture, and why I found marks on Emily earlier?" To Brooke Lauren seemed smaller than normal as if she was pulling into herself. She was looking down at her hands in her lap while her feet swung softly against the bed.

"Just don't like her." The voice was sullen and Brooke wondered where her happy, friendly daughter had gone.

"But honey you wanted a baby brother or sister."

"Changed my mind."

"Why have you changed your mind sweetie?" The pain eyes that finally met hers broke Brooke's heart.

"Daddy said to Uncle Nathan that the day she was born was the best day of his life and that she was his princess. And he keeps saying she's the most beautiful baby in the world. Daddy loves her more than he loves me. I used to be his princess, and he wasn't even there when I was born, he never saw me as a baby because he was too busy. He never said nice stuff like that about the time he met me first. I hate her!" Brooke felt the guilt cut through her like a knife. She bundled her daughter into her arms and kissed her head.

"Sweetheart neither mommy nor daddy love Emily more than we love you. We love you both exactly the same and we always will. And you are still daddy's princess, that hasn't changed. There are two of you now."

"Not the same."

"I know it's not. But you know how daddy calls you his pretty girl, well a long time ago before you were born that's daddy used to call me. But now you get called his pretty girl, sometimes he'll still say it to me. But he says it more to you. And I don't mind sharing because I know that daddy still loves me just the same as before, but he loves you too, just as much as me."

"I still hate her." Lauren slipped off the bed and began to pull her clothes off to get ready for bed, signalling to her mother that as far as she was concerned the conversation was done. Brooke left the room and followed the sound of tapping computer keys to find Lucas in the study. He broke away as he saw her enter the room and she came round the desk and settled herself in his lap. She snuggled into his chest and he wrapped his arms around her.

"Lauren hates the baby." He chuckled.

"Don't be silly, it's just an adjustment for her." She twisted her neck to look up at him.

"I mean it Lucas, she's jealous. She heard you telling Nate that the day Em was born was the best of your life. She's upset because you call her princess which is supposed to be Lauren's pet name and she thinks that because you call Em the most beautiful baby in the world and you weren't around when she was that age that you love Emily more than her. And that's all my fault." Lucas sighed.

"It's not your fault. I thought we agreed that we'd forget that, the past. What's done is done and we can't erase it Brooke. You had your reasons and they were valid at the time obviously. Whether they were right or wrong is irrelevant now."

"Maybe we should tell her that you weren't there because I never told you."

"Don't be ridiculous. She's too young to understand and it wouldn't serve any purpose. I'll talk to her, but we don't ever need to tell her about any of that stuff." Brooke stood to allow Lucas to go and see their daughter. She managed to stay sat in the study for a total of about 2 minutes before tiptoeing down the hall to eavesdrop on the conversation. She peeked round the door and found Lauren settled in bed, a discarded book on her lap and Lucas sat beside her, one arm around her tiny shoulders.

"Lauren the day I walked into grandma's house and saw you I was terrified. You were so beautiful and clever. You were so grown up. I was scared that I'd be a terrible father to you, but I loved you so much that I just had to try and be the best father. I know I wasn't there when you were Emily's age but that doesn't mean I don't love more than anything in the world, just like your sister. The two of you are my life and I would never be able to choose one over the other, you're both as special to me as each other. And the reason the day Emily was born was the happiest day of my life is because my family was finally complete and my life was perfect because I had my amazing, beautiful, clever, funny and talented little girl, I had your mommy who I will love for every day of my life and then we had a baby girl as well. See when I was growing up I didn't know I had a little brother, so i didn't have anyone to play with. When I got older I decided that when I had children I wanted more than, so my child would never be alone. Which is why it was perfect when Emily got here, because I never want you to be alone. I wanted you have to someone to play with, someone to teach things too. And you know what Emily gets – an amazing big sister to look up to. Don't ever think that you don't mean everything to me, because you do. You and your sister are the most important people in my life."

"More important than mommy?"

"More important than mommy, mommy comes second to you two."

"Won't she be upset?" Lucas laughed.

"No honey she won't be upset cos guess what, compared to you and Emily I'm second to mommy too."

"I'll be nicer." Lucas placed a kiss on her head.

"Want me to read your book to you?"

"Yes please daddy." Brooke smiled and stepped into the room.

"Hey I thought if you guys were having story time maybe you'd like this book instead of your school one." She slid a book from the bookshelf and handed it to Lucas. Both his and Lauren's faces lit up on realising that it was the book Lucas had written for Lauren the first birthday he'd been around. Brooke kissed her daughter and her fiancé and left them to spend time together.


	39. Wedding Day

Lucas woke at the sound of not one but two screaming children, it took him a minute to realise this was because he was not at home, but at his mother's. On her not so comfortable sofa no less. But the fact the twins cries had woken up from a pained slumber at 6am didn't bother him, because today, May 10th, was his wedding day. As he lay there listening to the sounds of his mother's home coming alive, his mom and uncle tending to their children he reflected on how much life had changed since he'd first stopped off in Tree Hill before he was intending to head to New York. It didn't feel like it had been 2 years since then. Such a lot had happened in such a small period of time, he'd gained a daughter, fallen completely in love with the girl he should have always been with, endured endless drama, had a baby with the woman he loved and now finally today that woman would become his wife. Brooke Davis would become Mrs Brooke Scott, and he didn't think anything would sound as perfect to his ears as her name would.

The three months between when his daughter had been born and his wedding day had been a difficult period of adjustment for them all. Brooke cursing her determination to have a spring wedding – meaning just a matter of a month and a half to slim down to her pre-baby weight. Luckily she was born with the type of body that metabolised well and though she may still be a few pounds heavier than she once had been not nearly as much as some women would be 3 months after giving birth. To him the extra few pounds she still carried were certainly all in the right places. She had a curvy, sexy womanly body and he was overjoyed to think she was going to be his wife in just a few short hours.

* * *

To the rest of the world the setting for the Davis/Scott wedding must have seemed insane. But to Lucas it was perfect. Both had known a traditional church wedding was not what they wanted. Brooke being adamant that if she was going to the trouble of getting married in spring she wanted to be outdoors to enjoy the season. While they talked about the beach and various different scenic places they just never felt a spark ensuring it was the right place to get married. A family trip out and a chance suggestion, a simple off the cuff remark by his fiancée said entirely in jest at the time planted the thought in both their heads. A thought that flourished without ever speaking of it until he decided to ask if she would seriously consider it. He'd been delighted and astounded that she too had been thinking the same as him. So with a few touches to make the place look more romantic than it would appear at first glance they'd made the decision to get married at the river court. The chairs were lined up on the court, the aisle was a long white carpet, the alter was a simple wooden construction adorned with flowers. It was a simple wedding, no one who had once known Brooke Davis would have believed this to be her wedding, but after everything they'd been through all that mattered to them was becoming man and wife in front of their family and close friends in a place that held so many memories for them. His eyes travelled away from the place to focus on the people. In order to ensure that there was no divide or 'his' side or 'her' side for the most important people in their lives were not 'his' or 'her' side but 'their' the chairs were in continuous rows with the aisle to the left, it curled round the front of the seating to led Brooke to the alter. There in the front row was his beaming mother, Deb beside her and somehow between the two they were managing to contain the twins, Jamie and Emily. At 7 months old the twins were cruising and desperate to be off, so while they awaited the arrival of the bride his mother was allowing them to make their way up and down the row of chairs. He watched his brother with his son and smiled. It felt so natural to him now to belong to this family. His brother, his nephew. Years ago he'd have been horrified if anyone had suggested such a thing to him. The sound of a car horn signalled the arrival of the bride. Nathan left Jamie with Deb and came to stand at Lucas' side. Karen grabbed her children and settled one on the seat beside her and the other in her lap. Emily asleep in her pushchair wedged between the chairs. His felt tears spring to his eyes at the sight on the first of the bridal party to begin the walk down the aisle. Her dress was fuchsia, thin straps with a full sweeping skirt, the material gathered in the middle to the right of the dress pinned in place with a corsage. Her brown hair pinned up in curls. And he was stunned to see just how beautiful she was. His baby girl. Lauren beamed from ear to ear as she made her way along the aisle, scattering flower petals as she moved in time to the soft music. Rachel followed next, her red hair pinned back in the style of an old Hollywood star. Her dress was just above her knee, it was strapless with pleating in the bodice leading to an empire line with a full skirt. The colour exactly that of Lauren's dress. The simple white Gerber daisies tied together with a line of the same fuchsia material. The exact same bundle was clasped in the hands on Brooke's maid of honour. His oldest and best friend, his sister-in-law, Haley. While the colour of her dress matched Rachel's her style did not. Classic Haley the dress had wide straps that led to a v-neckline, the material crossed over down to the pleated sash around her middle, pinned at the side with a corsage matching Lauren's. The skirt like the others was a full wide skirt, ending just below her knees. She caught his eye as she stepped onto the aisle and gave a soft smile. In a flash he was able to see her not much older than Lauren was, a gap in her smile as she waited for the space left by her baby tooth to be filled. He turned away from the girls to watch his brother as Haley came closer. The love that had been so strong two teenagers had married was still so evident in the look on his face, the smile on her lips. Lucas' one hope in that moment was that he and Brooke would be as happy and in love in their future years as Nathan and Haley had been in theirs. The thoughts of his brother and oldest friend vanished as he glimpsed his bride, standing beside the man who was the only man who'd ever taken the fathering role in either of their lives. Her long brown hair fell over her right shoulder in soft waves, a few delicate strands left framing her beautiful beaming face. Her dress was of a vintage style, in ivory colour with material allowing what could easily have been a strapless dress to become an off-the-shoulder one, the material ruched in the bodice before draping downwards in a column to the floor, and then back upwards to the hoop in her right hand. She was breathtaking. He was transfixed by the very sight of her, becoming unaware of Lauren, Rachel and Haley reaching their positions. The only thing he was able to see was Brooke.

The Minister cleared his voice and the congregation sat to attention. Lucas finally tore his gaze away from his stunning bride to focus on the man about to make Brooke his wife. "We are gathered here today to witness the coming together of two people, Lucas and Brooke, whose hearts and spirits are entwined as one. They now desire to profess before all the world their intention henceforth to walk the road of life together. To these two people, this marriage signifies the birth of a new spirit, which is a part of each of us, yet not of any one of us alone. The beliefs and thoughts about love which motivate these two people are perhaps best expressed in the words of poet Kahlil Gibran:

_"You were born to be together, and together you shall be forevermore.  
You shall be together when the wings of death scatter your days.  
Ay, you shall be together even in your silent memory.  
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,  
And let the winds of the heaven dance between you.  
Love one another, but make not a bondage of love.  
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.  
Fill each other's cup, but drink not from one cup.  
Give one another of your bread, but eat not of the same loaf.  
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each of you be alone,  
Even as the strings of a lute are alone, though they quiver with the same music.  
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping,  
For only the hand of life can contain your hearts.  
And stand together, yet not too near together,  
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,  
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in shadow."_

Have you come here in the midst of these natural surroundings to affirm your commitment to each other?" The pair looked at one another before turning back to the minister and replying.

"We have."

"Who brings Brooke to stand beside Lucas ?" The minister questioned. Keith took a step forward, Brooke's and resting on his.

"I do." As he spoke he gently lifted her hand from his and placed it to rest upon Lucas' hand. A smile passed between the two men. A look which shared between just those two everything each felt upon the younger man's wedding.

"Are you willing, now and always to support and strengthen this marriage by upholding both Brooke and Lucas with your love and concern?"

"I am." Keith responded, sharing a smile with the pair before stepping back to stand in line with the bridesmaids. He placed his hand upon Lauren's shoulder and smiled at the ecstatic young girl whose dreams were coming true as she watched her parents marry.

"Please share your vows with each other." Lucas gently took Brooke's hand between his own and massaged his thumb across her palm. His eyes stared deep into hers and he felt like they were one.

"What can I say to you that I haven't already said, what can I give you that I haven't already given, is there anything of me that isn't yours already? My body, my mind, my heart, even my soul. Everything that is me belonged to you long before this, and it shall be yours long after this. I will follow you anywhere and everywhere you lead. Hand in hand and heart in heart. Brooke you have filled my world with meaning. You have made me so happy and more fulfilled as a person. Thank you for taking me as I am; loving me, and welcoming me into your heart. I promise to always love you, respect you as an individual, and to be faithful to you forever. Today I choose you to be my partner, and commit myself to you for the rest of my life."

"I used to be afraid of love, then I met you." She smiled. "Circumstance and years took us apart and then I became afraid not of love but of falling in love, of giving my heart away. How could I trust a man to love me, to give to me all that I wanted to give to him? Lucas, when I met you again, the real you the one with me today, I realized how much we could share together. You have renewed my life: Today I join that life with yours."

"Do you Lucas, knowing this woman's love for you and returning it, realizing her strengths and learning from them, recognizing her weaknesses and helping her to overcome them, take Brooke to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do."

"Do you Brooke, knowing this man's love for you and returning it, realizing his strengths and learning from them, recognizing his weaknesses and helping him to overcome them, take Lucas to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do." Lucas saw the tear glisten in her eyes and leant forward to smooth them away knowing she'd curse if they ruined her make-up before the photos were taken.

"Please now exchange rings." He turned to his brother to receive the ring. Nathan smiled at him and nodded his head almost imperceptibly. After everything they'd been through and everything he and Brooke had been through it meant more than he would ever be able to find the words to express that Nathan had agreed to be his best man. That after years of hatred and estrangement, tolerance and awkwardness that the two had become friends, brothers and that he gave his blessing to their love. Lucas turned back to Brooke and slowly slid the ring on her delicate finger. She then slipped one on his and he marvelled at the two gold bands, the purpose of them to let the world know that they loved one another and had pledged their lives to each other. "Let these rings serve as locks–not binding you together–but as keys, unlocking the secrets of your hearts for each other to know, and thus bringing you closer together forever. And now Lucas and Brooke, seeking the fulfilment of love and marriage, find again that the poet Gibran speaks for them:

_"Love has no other desire but to fulfil itself.  
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks to another day of loving.  
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;  
To return home eventide with gratitude, and then sleep with a prayer  
For the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips."  
_

These two people have been drawn together by their love for each other. May they practice self-discipline and patience throughout their marriage, for these are essential to lasting love. May they continue to trust each other, for trust is the foundation on which all love is built. Since Lucas and Brooke have pledged their love and commitment to each other before these witnesses, I declare that they are husband and wife. Congratulations! You may kiss the bride." They shared a chaste kiss in front of their applauding audience, the bridesmaids and best man enveloping them in a hug. Lucas broke away to share an embrace with his mother and scooping Emily from her position. He once again joined the group as the others slipped aside allowing the family a moment as one. He looked down at his wife and daughters and prayed life would stay as wondrous as it was this day.

**And finally that is it for this one. Look out for the sequel Broken, set about 10/11 years in the future.**

**Also please check out my other fics, Starting Over which takes off around season 6 and Superman Tonight which is entirely AU.**

**Thank you to everyone who has continued to read this fic and for all the reviews.**


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